"Gilbert, Frederick. Do you two know what a ball is?" I beamed, hopping up and down.
"Ooh! Me! Me! Me!"
"Yes Gilbert?"
"If you throw it down hard enough in some rooms you can have it bounce up and hit the ceiling!"
"Not that type of ball Gilbert."
"I know! I know!" George cheered.
"Yes Frederick?"
"You kick it and yell 'score!'"
"No, not that type of ball either. This is not a ball you can hold." I tilted my head, confused.
"Is it an imaginary ball?"
"Ooh! A metaphor or hyperbole!"
"No. Children, let me speak."
"But I want to give the right answer!" I called.
We were in Fritz's office in the middle of a lesson. Some lessons were together on the same subject and some we shared. Like today. Today's lesson was apparently about a ball you could not hold. Fritz is deep. A genius.
"Ooh! I know! Bullets!"
"No! Cannon ball! They're super heavy!"
"How about that ball thing people put on catapults but it's on fire?"
"Boys, please."
"Ooh! Fireball!" Fritz sighed, steepled his fingers, and seemed to be waiting for the right answer.
"An angel!"
"Angels aren't balls Gilbert."
"How about a ball that's yet to be created?"
"A ball that no longer exists!"
"Children. Please."
"Okay. I give up." George said, deflating.
"Fußball! Uhh… musical notes! Uhh, ballads! I give up. This game is hard."
"Ready for the answer boys?" We nodded. "The answer is a ballroom ball, a dance."
"Oh. Boo! I'm out." I stood but at a disapproving noise from Fritz I quickly retook my seat.
"A dance? What's a dance?" George asked.
"I don't really remember it but I know it means personal touch between man and woman. Which, by the way,-" I crossed my arms over my chest, giving my most 'hell no' look. "- I absolutely refuse."
"Personal touch? I've never even touched a girl before!"
"Nor really have I, and I don't intend to."
"You two come with me." I glowered as they stood up and headed for the door. "Gilbert, come."
"I don't want to play this game. Let's play something else."
"Gilbert, this game is very important for your future. You and Frederick are old enough to participate in the balls I hold in the ballroom in the future, especially so when it comes time to choose Frederick a bride." I crossed my arms over my chest, frowned, narrowed my eyes, and looked down.
"I don't care. I don't want to dance. Not with girls anyway."
"Very well Gilbert." I beamed at him. "You have a choice to make." George stared at Fritz, eager to hear any alternative. "You can come to the ballroom with Frederick and I for dancing lessons or you can stay in that chair for a time out until which point in time you decide to do what you're told and learn to dance. Which one do you choose?" George's face fell.
"You can't do that!"
"You forget, Dad's the king. He can do whatever he wants." I opened my mouth to retort but paused. He's right. Fritz is the King. King of Prussia, me.
"Well Gilbert?" I opened my mouth and closed it a few times. I decided to be stubborn and hope he changes his mind.
"I'm not doing it. You can't make me!" I crossed my arms stubbornly. Fritz nodded.
"That's your decision then? You choose to stay in time out on that chair?"
"Pfft. I've been put in time out many times before."
"You won't be allowed off the chair, getting up would mean that you accept the dancing lessons."
"Come on Gil. Just do what you're told. It's easier that way." I scoffed.
"Shut up George. You're one to talk."
"Frederick, go get Prince Henry or Abelard."
"What?" Getting another idea I quickly spoke up.
"Never mind. I'll come along."
"I'm pleased you changed your mind. Now you two, follow me." I followed him and George to the ballroom where apparently the Queen was waiting for us. Fritz turned to us. "There are two pre-steps to beginning a dance. First you bow to each other like so." He turned back to his wife and I quietly scoffed. Bowing. That's a form of submission and unless my dance partner is to be Fritz, there was no chance in hell that I would actually bow to someone else. "Gilbert. Gilbert." I looked up at him, unaware that he'd been trying to get my attention.
"Yes Your Majesty Fritz sir?"
"Are you paying attention?"
"I'm always paying attention, sir."
"Then what did I just say and do?"
"I didn't mean that I was paying attention to today's lesson on dancing."
"Gilbert, this is very important. I thought you chose the ballroom over the chair." I frowned.
"I did. I said that I'd come with you, not that I'd learn how to dance." George let out a disbelieving noise before laughing. Which in turn made me laugh.
"Boys! Don't disrespect the king in such a manner." Elisabeth scolded. "I'm not above calling for your whipping boys." I flinched at the same time George did.
"That wouldn't be necessary. Though I dare say that you're getting quite close to disrespectful behaviour Gilbert Beilschmidt." I flinched again, looking at my feet. "Now pay attention."
"I told you I didn't want to learn." I muttered.
"Gilbert, stop." George said. I smiled.
"We're learning to dance. I can dance. Watch this." I made my way apart from them before performing. Then I grinned as George clapped. "Watch this. It's a Russian dance." I tried my best to sit in midair before throwing a leg out and quickly putting it back to kick the other out and quickly doing this a few times before jumping on my feet, standing. "Hey!" I tried again but fell backwards. I chuckled as George laughed. "I fell. Ow." I stood back up. "Watch this!" I bit my lip as I started my foot work before smiling.
"Wow." I started belting out random lyrics.
"Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum, a pirate is I. Oh adventure is the life for me. On the run, escape is what I'll do. Oh yo ho ho and a bottle of rum. Do as you please. Yar har, we'll take our leave and go. Merrily we row along. The sea she tossed us too and fro. I sail the ocean blue for an adventure just for me until I find the perfect treasure just for me. The sea she is quite a sight to behold, the sea she is my-"
"Gilbert! Would you pay attention to me? What song is that?" George demanded.
"I don't know."
"... The sea is your what?"
"I forget."
"Well start over."
"I don't remember exactly what I said."
"What?"
"I'm well known for running my mouth, I won't be responsible for what comes out."
"I thought you said what you mean and mean what you say."
"Running my mouth."
"That's contradictory."
"I say it to get my point across or to get out of trouble." He started laughing so hard he slapped his knee. I raised a brow. "Really?" I stopped. "Watch this!" I spun in circles repeatedly until I got the hang of it, quickly, before moving. I spun, jumped, and leaped. Going in circles. George started doing the same thing.
"Children, please. I'm trying to teach you something important."
"Your wasting both your Father's time and mine." The Queen said.
"Aw, come on Mom. Have some fun for once in your life. Dance with us! It's easy!" Then just as he said that he fell. I chuckled.
"Ha ha. You fell." I chuckled before toppling over myself. In trying to catch myself I only hurt myself. "Oww. Fuck. That hurt." Then I laughed.
"You're so weird Gil. I've only heard people laugh at themselves… What is it? Ah! Bitterly. You give genuine laughter."
"I've exhausted myself."
"Lies. You've gone much longer." I chuckled.
"Of course." George laughed.
"I love you Gilbert. You do a fine job of making boring things fun." I gave another chuckle.
"I live to please. You know how awesome I am, and I know how awesome I am."
"Everyone does."
"Now who's lying? Austria-"
"- is jealous."
"If you two are quite finished, today's lesson is far from over." Fritz said. "Do I have your attention now?" George groaned.
"Yes Father, you've got my attention." He said.
"Do I have yours, Gilbert?" I sighed.
"Go ahead, Your Majesty Fritz Sir." I arched my back as I laid on the floor, bringing my chest up as I stretched. Then I rolled over and stretched again, getting into a low bowing position as my back arched down. Then I politely let myself drop and laid my head over my folded arms. I watched Fritz.
He bowed to her, she grabbed her skirts and curtsied, he asked her to dance. She agreed. He wrapped an arm around her waist and grabbed her hand with the other, intertwining their fingers. Do I have to watch this? It's almost as bad as watching them kiss. George seemed to be thinking the same thing because he couldn't keep his eyes on them longer than a few seconds. Nor could I.
"Dad, this is embarrassing. I'll learn, but I'm not doing it."
"Agreed. Two votes." I agreed.
"This is not a debate. You two will learn." I was tempted to tell him to make me but I knew better. This was the only drawback to an absolute monarchy. They tell you to do something then you have to. It's like their word is law. I smirked.
"I bet France and Spain don't know how to dance like that."
"I happen to know that Francis already does, his boss throws lots of parties. Now, I shall have you two brought partners and you can begin learning. The man leads the dance and the woman follows."
"As is life." George joked, making me laugh. However his mother quickly got on to us.
"Don't turn something this important into a joke."
"You're right. Trying to teach us to do it is the joke." I replied. George scoffed a laugh before turning it into a cough. I smirked. "Do I look like a gentleman? An aristocrat? Austria? No. To all the above."
"Boys! I have had enough of your disrespect and attitudes. This is very important for your futures. You must learn to dance. It is what is done, it is tradition. You are being rude. Consider this a warning. Excuse me. I have to go find the said partners so you two can at least practice the first two steps. Once you two learn them then you can go until I call you in for your personal lessons." Fritz released the Queen and then left the room.
"I believe that I shall have Baldur and Timo summoned. You two can't seem to behave yourselves." The Queen left the room.
"I don't get it. We're just playing. What did we do wrong?"
"Well I assume that we've been ignoring the King and Queen while we've been playing. A peasant would have been beheaded for such behaviour. I believe."
"No, a peasant wouldn't be in the castle period. Least not this one. Commoners are not allowed. They're called the way they are for a reason."
"Yeah. Poverty."
"Not poverty, social ranking. The king is on top."
"I suppose." We laid there until the King got back. He had two women with him.
"As learning this skill is so essential in your lives, for your future, you will learn not only from me but from Abelard, Prince Henry, your mother, and the finest and most skilled dance instructor I can find. Thankfully I have already sent word that I'm looking for an instructor on such a skill. It shan't be long."
"Friiiitzzzz." I whined. "I don't want to. Why isn't that enough for you?"
"You might as well. We lost. We have to."
"Why don't you want to?" Fritz asked. "Is there a reasonable reason why you don't want to or can't?"
"I don't know. I just don't want to. If I learn to dance, then I shall be expected to do so. Like a gentleman, like an aristocrat, like - like - like Austria!"
"The same reason you refused to learn to play the piano. Do you remember what happened? Do you know how to play the piano?" Actually, yes. Yes I do. I purposely don't want to remember. And yes, yes I know how to play the piano. I blushed as a thought occurred to me. Is he threatening me? "The same applies here."
"Friiiitzzzz. Surely I can give you something in exchange, something to bargain with. Jewels, more learning, less fights. You name it, you got it."
"Gilbert, I am putting my foot down." Great. He's being stubborn. At that moment the Queen walked in with Baldur and Timo.
"Putting your foot down about what dear?" She asked.
"Gilbert refuses to dance." Well maybe I can make it appear that I'm doing as requested. "Why did you bring them? Surely they have other things to be doing?" Elisabeth waved her hand dismissively.
"Nonsense. I went ahead and put two others on their job detail."
"And what of their jobs?"
"No, I hired two new hands last week."
"I see. Well. Moving on. Stand up boys." We stood and Fritz had Elma partner with me and Sofia with George. Fritz demonstrated where to put your hands again. I blushed. I was expected to do that? I crossed my arms over my chest and narrowed my eyes to the floor.
"Shan't! Tis embarrassing." Fritz unhanded his wife before grabbing one of my wrists. I freaked. "Fritz, no!" However, he only placed my hand where he wanted it. I struggled to pull away. "No!" At this time everyone but the King and Queen were all blushing. Baldur, Timo, Elma, and Sofia were around our age, which made this even more awkward. George backed away from Sofia. The girls, I assume, weren't complaining because he was the King.
"You as the male have to lead the dance. That means this hand goes here." I'd given up my struggles, intending to pull away once he stepped away. "This hand goes here. Her hands go-" I quickly stepped away.
"Don't." He yanked me back into position and my blush deepened. I looked down, refusing to meet anyone's gaze. He put my hands back and I bit my lip.
"Her hands go here -" He placed one hand. "- and the other goes here." He placed the other. Then he walked over to George, who'd stepped quite a bit away from Sofia, and dragged him to the girl and did the same thing he did to me. "Now remember this. Try removing your hands and putting them back in the same spot." I quickly removed my hands as did Elma. However, the King made his displeasure known and we quickly put our hands back. There were some minor adjustments. Then again we were told to do this. Again and again until we got it right every time. "Now step away and we'll take it from the top."
"I'm out." George said. "I'm not bowing. I'm a prince. The Prince of Prussia."
"The Prince of Prussia will bow. That is how every dance begins. Watch me children." Fritz bowed to his wife.
"Dad! It's submission!"
"Frederick, I'm putting my foot down, just as I told Gilbert."
"It's humiliating."
"Very." I agreed with him.
"Children, do what your Father tells you." Fritz bowed and she curtsied. Then they began dancing. "Look. One, two, three. One, two, three. One, two, three. There's a pattern, a tempo. It is done precisely and gracefully. Like that of a moving body of water. It is fluid. It travels between here and there while traversing others who are in the dance." I rolled my eyes at the Queen. "I saw that Gilbert." I froze. "Now you two try." Neither of us moved. Fritz gave a short sigh.
"I think that's enough for today. You two need to get comfortable with this otherwise you will be nervous and you will mess up." They stopped dancing. "Dismissed." I beamed.
"Thanks Fritz." I turned and left the room quickly to get away from the scene. I never want to do that again.