A/N- Reviews are like oxygen. You get too much you get too high, not enough and you're gonna die. Reviews make you high.

Okay, yes. Those are the lyrics to "Love Is Like Oxygen". But I think it gets my point across, right? You don't want me to die, do you? DO YOU?!

I'm regretting this note, but I've come this far, it seems like a waste to turn back now. Thanks for all your loving words of encouragement. You'll all be happy to know that I actually am finally getting to the real plot of the story.

And yet again, big ass thank you to Lizzieturbo for all of her help. I'm pretty sure my life would suck without you. Yep, Kelly Clarkson. I'm not original enough to think of lame things to say on my own...

It was shortly after noon the next day when Rogue rolled into the apartment complex parking lot. She grabbed her bag off the passenger seat and hurried across the lot, glancing at her watch as she hauled the heavy glass door open. Logan was expecting her back in less than two hours, leaving very little time to get down to business. But time restraints had never deterred Remy before, and she was sure he wouldn't let it start now. She punched the button to summon the elevator and waited impatiently for the doors to open. Once the elevator brought her to their floor, she walked swiftly down the hall, opening the door without even bothering to knock.

"Alright Lebeau, I've got a fresh bag of Funions with your name on it. Pants off." She announced, dropping her bag to the ground and tossing her keys onto the island counter. She glanced around the empty living room with a frown. "Remy?"

She moved to check out on the patio when she heard a familiar voice coming from down the hall, causing her to stop and furrow her brow. The voice was slightly muffled, but there was no doubt in her mind that it belonged to Kitty. She turned and started towards the hallway, pausing when she heard a man's voice which very obviously belonged to Remy.

And then she heard Kitty moan, "Harder Remy."

Her eyebrows shot up and she sucked in a breath, trying her best not to make any noise as she tiptoed closer.

"You're doin' it wrong." Pyro's voice filled Rogue's ears and she stopped dead in her tracks.

"I'm pretty experienced Pyro. I know what I'm doing."

"Then shut up and do it!" Kitty demanded, "Harder!"

"I don't want to hurt you!"

"You're not going to hurt me, I can handle it."

"Just relax, Katya." Piotr said calmly, "Move over, I will take it from here."

"I can certainly do better than you." Remy scoffed.

Kitty let out a long sigh, "Would someone do something already?" She moaned again, "Oh God..."

Rogue hurried down the hall to Kitty's open bedroom door and was very grateful to see all of its occupants were fully clothed. Kitty was laying on her stomach on her bed with Remy perched on the edge next to her, rubbing her lower back with a frown.

"Do it harder!" Kitty barked, "All you're doing is tickling me! And you said you were actually good-"

"I'm not used to doing this for any other purpose than to get into a girls pants." Remy snapped, "The skill doesn't transfer to actual usefulness."

"What the hell?!" Rogue interrupted, causing all four sets of eyes to turn to her in the doorway, "I don't even know- What the hell!?"

"Katya threw her back out yesterday, trying to move our new couch." Piotr supplied, crossing his arms with a frown, "Remy seems to think he can give some sort of magic massage to make her feel better."

"I can! I'm good at this! Back me up here, Rogue."

"Jesus! It sounded like y'all were havin' some kind of sick orgy in here or something!" Rogue rubbed a hand over her face and shook her head, "It's gunna take me a minute to recover."

"You have a sick mind, Rogue." Remy informed her, "This sounds nothing like sex."

"Eeew!" Kitty grimaced, swatting Remy away from her and turning to look at Rogue, "You actually thought that I would- Ew!"

"Look, I took a class for this kinda thing," Pyro shook his head as he flipped through Kitty's CD collection, bringing them back to the topic at hand, "I'm tellin' you, I can do better."

"Unless your secret job is a legit massage therapist, Pyro, I'm doubting the usefulness of this so-called class." Kitty said with her face buried in her pillow.

"Did it have a happy ending?" Remy smirked, prompting Pyro to chuck a CD at his head.

"Hey! Don't take your anger out on my property!" Kitty snapped.

"So wait a second, back up here." Rogue rubbed her fingertips on her forehead, "You three let her help move the couch?!"

"She barely helped at all." Remy rolled his eyes, "She didn't like where we put it and tried to move it herself."

"And now it feels like I'm dying." Kitty groaned into her pillow, "I can't move, and I almost collapsed in the shower this morning. Thank God I didn't. I just know Pyro would be chomping at the bit to bust down the door and help me out."

Pyro chuckled and gave a little nod, "I would. I'm a gentleman."

"Did you take some Advil or something?" Rogue knit her brow and took a few steps into the room.

"Oh no! I didn't think of that." Kitty snipped sarcastically, dropping her face back onto her pillow.

"Apparently being in pain turns her into a giant raving bitch." Remy informed Rogue with a frown.

Piotr let out a breath and shook his head, "I am telling you, back home, when the pigs were in labor they would get all worked up and we would have to massage them to calm them down-"

"You are not seriously comparing me to a laboring pig right now, Peter." Kitty gave him a very pointed look, "Right?"

"No." He furrowed his brow and looked down, "But it worked for the pigs..."

Kitty buried her face into her pillow again, grumbling about finding a new place to live when Rogue shooed Remy away,

"It's a massage for chrissake, how hard could it be."

Kitty pointed out the painful area and let out a long groan when Rogue dug her thumbs into the spot.

"Right there?"

"Yesss..." Kitty whimpered, "Right there."

Rogue kneaded the spot for a moment, "Do you want it harder?"

"Yes." Kitty moaned.

"Oh, okay..." Remy pursed his lips and nodded, "I'm hearing the sex thing now."

Pyro and Piotr nodded in agreement and Rogue rolled her eyes, "Stupid men."

"Get out." Kitty demanded, shooing them out the door with her hand.

"Geeze, see if we try to help you again." Pyro muttered as he followed the other two out the door. Once the room was emptied of testosterone, Kitty craned her neck as far as she could to look back at Rogue.

"So what, you just come over when I'm not here for some afternoon delight? Do you do this often?" Kitty clipped.

"Holy crap, you are a bitch."

"Well my back hurts!" She whined, "And my boss totally threatened to fire me this morning when I called in. I mean, he didn't say that, but he hinted. I heard him hint."

Rogue pressed her elbow into Kitty's lower back and used it to knead the knot, ignoring her crying out in pain.

"To answer your question, no. I don't do this often." She began, "I needed some... tension relief."

Kitty grimaced into her pillow, "Tension? What are you tense about?"

Rogue let out a breath dropped her hands into her lap, "I have a date."

Kitty looked back at Rogue over her shoulder, ignoring the searing pain the simple movement caused and stared at her friend, "Seriously? Like, a real date?!"

"No, a fake date. He's actually a hologram."

Kitty rolled her eyes, waiting for Rogue to elaborate beyond her sarcasm.

"I met him... at Starbucks. A few weeks ago." She pressed her lips together to hide a smile, "His name's Holden."

Kitty pushed herself up to a sitting position as carefully as she could and propped her pillow up on her headboard to lean against, "Like, Catcher in the Rye?"

Rogue grinned and looked down at her hands, "We bonded over the barista getting our names wrong on our cups. She wrote Rose on mine. He was telling me that Rose was a pretty name." She laughed.

"So... you have a date. And your first instinct is to come here and screw around with Gambit." Kitty frowned.

"No, that was not my first instinct." Rogue snipped, "My first instinct was to panic. Actually dating someone freaks me out, Kit. This was Remy's idea, you know, to let off some steam."

Kitty sighed and shook her head, "Your relationship gives me a headache."

"I told you Kit, it's not a relationship-"

"Right, right, bros with benefits." Kitty cut her off with a wave, "So tell me about this Holden guy. Is he cute?"

"Definitely a 9." Rogue smirked, "Broad shoulders, bright blue eyes, wavy black hair..."

"Oooo, momma like." Kitty grinned mischievously, "Nice body?"

"Hell yeah." Rogue nodded, "I wouldn't mind licking nacho cheese off his abs, I'll tell you that much."

Kitty grimaced, "Gross."

"But he's also really funny. And nice, and he seems pretty smart." Rogue added as she continued to nod.

"Wow, you that all that from one conversation about coffee cups?" Kitty snorted.

Rogue offered her a sarcastic smile in response.

"How exactly is this going to work then, you go out on dates with this Starbucks guy, and then come to Remy for some nookie?" Kitty raised an eyebrow.

"No. As of tonight, no more Remy. The only reason I started fooling around with Remy in the first place is because I've yet to meet a decent guy who isn't freaked the hell out by my mutation." Rogue shrugged, "Maybe Holden's one of the good ones."

"I guess."

Rogue pursed her lips for a moment, "So, I feel like I may regret asking this, but why exactly did y'all need to buy a new couch?"

Kitty sighed and rolled her eyes, "Pyro was trying to impress Anya with his lighter party tricks."

"Oh boy." Rogue winced, "And Anya is..."

"Pete's ballerina girlfriend." Kitty gave her head a shake, "That girl is definitely a fish out of water around here. She's so uptight. And frankly, a little bit of a bigot."

Rogue quirked an eyebrow and waited for Kitty to elaborate.

"She just... she's a little bit wary of the whole mutant thing. I mean, I get it. Not all of us are... safe. As Pyro demonstrated." Kitty shrugged, "But she's basically written Remy off completely, just because of his eyes. And she doesn't want to see Pete's mutation at all. Like it's some kind of deformity. Like a third nipple that he has to hide."

Both of Rogue's eyebrows shot upwards and she blinked at Kitty, "Seriously?"

"Yep."

"I'd like to give this little miss thing a piece of my mind." She sniffed, "I mean, Pyro, I get. But not even wanting to see your own boyfriend using his ability because you're what... creeped out? And there is nothing wrong with Remy's eyes. I happen to like Remy's eyes. I mean, it's not like I'm gunna start writing sonnets about his glowing red orbs or some crap, but damn. What the hell is wrong with this bitch?"

"I know... but I can see her apprehension. Like, Dr. McCoy. He's pretty intimidating looking, right? It can take a bit to get used to, especially if you've never really been exposed to mutants before." Kitty pursed her lips and let out a long breath, "And she's... trying..."

Rogue leaned back and eyed Kitty for a moment, "What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you sticking up for this girl?!"

"Pete really seems to like her." Kitty's shoulders slumped and she let out another sigh, "He's always saying that the guys scare away all of his girlfriends... I feel bad."

"I don't think that sticking up for the uptight bigot is the appropriate move, Kit. Maybe this time you should just let nature take its course. Live and let die, kinda thing."

"She's really not that bad." Kitty frowned, "I'm sure she's not. Pete has to see something in her."

"I don't see why you feel the need to spend a ton of time and effort shoving carrots and sugar cubes under this chicks nose just so Piotr can bringing her home to bang her." Rogue rolled her eyes, "You're not the jerk whisperer."

"If I was, I could totally have my own TLC show. You totally know I could." Kitty pointed out with a grin.

Rogue smiled thoughtfully in return, offering her a single nod, "I'd watch that."