Snippet 92

No Jeggings Allowed

Genre: Humor/NSFW

Pairs: None

Parody: RWBY/Camp Camp/CollegeHumor

AU-Type: High School AU

Tags: Teacher!Roman, Teachers do not get paid enough to deal with this mess, Anvils will be Dropped, a bit of Social Commentary, a bit of a mix of the first and seconds Jegging videos, Slight NSFW

Note: Cinder, Emerald, Mercury, Adam, and Ilia have been made younger to fit with the theme. The Camp Campers have also been aged up.

Roman Torchwick hated his job. Being a teacher in the modern era of education was simply a nightmare. He hated the low pay, long hours, and the incompetence of the principal and the board. He used to love teaching too, but the years wore on him. At least he was a sub, and only had to be called in when needed. Today, he had to deal with an advanced algebra class. He almost pities those students, but this was Beacon Academy, the private school that will screw you over to line administration's pocket. He looked down at the note from the principal.

"I wish that grey-haired ass would just…" Roman thought before entering the room to see a warzone. "Oh god, why?"

Roman cleared his throat and said "Hello class my name is Mr. Torchwick. I will be your substitute while Mr. Black is getting trialed for child abuse and domestic violence. You can call me Mr. T, and I have a note from the principal," No jeggings.""

Roman did this while writing his name on the board while the groans of protest from one student. Said student was Emerald Sustrai, the queen bee's bitch and asskisser wearing just a lime green tube top with the illegal jeggings. Said jeggings were tight

"What?" Emerald said standing up to show them off. "Come on, they're jeans!"

"No, you vapid brat, they're leggings. They're just disguised to look like jeans," Roman retorted leaving her to huff.

"Yeah, Emmy. We can see all those asscrack and crotch lines," Mercury teased. "Better with them off though."

"Whatever." Emerald huffed as she sat back down.

"What about my tacket?" Ilia asked showing it off.

"Hey, is that a tank top jacket?" Roman asked getting a confirmation from her. "No, that's very slutty and it can't be worn. Besides, it's only making you look like a shrimp."

"I bet you hate these steleakers too, don't you?" Ilia screamed standing in them.

"Yeah, those are definitely banned. Now, are those pants you're wearing? What are those?" Roman asked tiredly.

Really wishing he had taken Neo's path of going into showmaking. She's now writing her hit animated show, SPHR, and making bank with her own studio, Shark Fang Studios. Maybe he'll give her a call at the end of school. Just a few more months, he thought.

"Stockis? Stocking khakis?" Ilia exclaimed with disbelief.

"Gotcha. Not allowed." Roman said with a shrug.

"What about Max? He's wearing a hat!" Sun said pointing to sulky student wearing a turban.

"That's a turban, you shirtless idiot. It's cultural!" Roman scolded.

Max stood up revealing he was not wearing pants saying, "I also got a dick turban."

"Fucking….just what? I vouch for you, man!" Roman said fighting off laughter.

"So, I guess that means I can't wear my nirt?" Yang asked sarcastically.

"You mean that shitty yellow jacket?" Roman asked, beginning to feel a little annoyed.

She unzipped her hoodie to reveal her bare chest saying, "My not-a-shirt?".

Many would have snapped a photo for later use, especially Ilia. Yang's ample breasts had a bit of jiggle much to the joy of many. Roman wished it was her mother instead.

"That's just not wearing a shirt," Roman explained, suddenly feeling very tired.

"Even if she was eighteen, I can't even enjoy this. Ugh, I need a cigar." Roman thought.

'Mixed with a shirt!" Yang exclaimed defensively.

She pointed to the bottom of a plaid shirt hugging her waist.

"You'll still going to be SUSPENDED," he explained exasperatedly.

"Swearrings?" Ruby Rose asked innocently pointing to her earrings that were literally mini sweaters hanging from a metal hook.

"Sweater earrings! Those are absolutely fine!" Roman exclaimed happily. "Hell, you get to leave ten minutes early."

"I knew that they were lucky!" Ruby thought.

"Can I wear my belly shirt?" Ered asked getting a nod from Roman.

Ered really just wanted to show that she finally got some abs on her stomach. She wasn't near Pyrrha's level, but she could join the club now.

"What about my belly shirt?" Nora said literally wearing a tiny skirt around her belly.

"Where the fuck do you even those clothes?" Roman exclaimed. "And you're soaked…"

Nora's face was flushed as she was certainly getting off on the clothes her "daddy" (Ren) was having her wear.

"There's apart of the Nigiri Collection." Cinder said getting up to reveal she was completely naked. "It's where I got this Nunzie."

Roman's eye twitched. Yes, Cinder was attractive, but what she said was grinding on his mind.

"You're just naked…." Roman stammered.

"You just can't appreciate Jessica Nigiri's genius." Cinder said doing a hair clip. "You old fogey."

"Fogey? I'm only 24!" Roman raged. "Besides you're near 20 and still in high school!"

Cinder rolled her eyes and sat down. Roman noticed Dolph was clearly rubbing on out to Cinder, but let that go because it was not worth the effort to get mad.

"What about my bloodstained jacket?" Cardin asked.

"Aside the fact, you're wearing a jacket coated in blood in one layer. Is that blood even yours?" Roman asked dryly.

"Of course not, I strangled a homeless man and used his blood." Cardin said fluffing his jacket.

"Is my superhero cape, okay?" Velvet said nervously putting her hand. "I'm cosplaying as Supergirl for a class."

"Well that's fine." Roman said cheerfully only for that smile to fall to see Coco. "You have got to be kidding me."

"What? I'm cosplaying as a superheroine too." Coco said striking a pose.

She was literally naked save for a mask, gloves, and boots. Now Roman knew who Kekko Kamen was, but even he was not going to say it. But he could confirm that the carpet did match the drapes.

"Just…why?" Roman asked.

"Can I wear this condom?" A nude Jaune said holding a condom in his hand.

"Not instead of pants!" Roman roared. "Is this a prank?"

"No, sir. I need it for a turn on Blake." Jaune said pointing over to Blake and Sun.

"Can I wear Blake?" Sun said clearly having sex with Blake with reckless abandon.

Both were naked with Sun having Blake over the desk holding her hair with one hand. Behind him was Yatsuhashi, Fox, Ilia and Neil in a line waiting for a turn on the school bike. How did Ilia get back there? Roman didn't know, but he finally snapped.

Roman flipped Nikki's desk screaming, "ENOUGH! LISTEN YOU, YA LITTLE SHITS! I AM THE LAW AND I LAY IT OUT!"

"No space helmets outside of science classes," He stated.

Space Teen shrank in his chair and took off his helmet. Fucking Ozpin, he thought.

"No collarbone cardigans. No toeless boots." Roman said as Scarlet hid his shoes underneath his desk.

"No belly skirts. No slutty superhero costumes!" Roman roared. "No, fishnet body suits!"

The emo goth, Adam exclaimed, "The fuck I do to you asshole?!", while throwing down his trading cards.

"NO FUCKING AT YOUR DESK!" Roman said right as Sun climaxed right on Blake's back.

Yatushashi, Fox, Neil, and Ilia shuffled back to their desk disappointed as Sun confidently strode back to his desk.

"And finally, NO JEGGINGS!" Roman yelled close to breaking a blood vessel.

A chorus of "Yeah's", "Sure's", and "Whatever's" came from the class.

"Perfect. Now open up your textbooks to page sixteen," he said as he slid off his jacket, revealing a rather racy t-shirt of Kekko Kamen.

The class's outraged noises were even louder than their complaints.

"No, no, no, I am an adult, I can wear this shirt, I have earned this right!" Roman said defiantly.

Teaching really was a thankless job.

(A/N: This piece was a mix mash of bits from the first three Jeggings videos with a bit of my original styling. Honestly, just writing this one was hard as I couldn't stop laughing at the insanity. Next up, we return to a miniseries.)