Ho-Hum and the Alien Visitation

A Hyperdimension Neptunia Fan Fiction

by Derald Snyder

Chapter 19- Interviews and Interrogations

*Planeptune Basilicom, Training Room*

"Nep whoa! Ack! Yikes!" Neptune cried as she desperately dodged every projectile flying at her, until one nailed her in the face! "OW! I think my nose is bent!"

"Oh come on, it's just a tennis ball!" Dragon Ball sighed as she juggled another ball in her hand. "You girls need to work on your reflexes, if you don't want that ninja almost getting the better of you again!"

"You've got a point, but they still kinda sting, as fast as you throw them," Nepgear pointed out, she and her sister dressed in exercise clothes, Gear herself wearing a headband to keep her long hair out of her face.

"Yeah, besides, we can handle that ninja if he shows up again!" Neptune insisted.

"Are you sure about that?" DB's voice spoke up behind Neptune, causing her to yelp and leap a foot in the air! "See, if I'd been that ninja just now... Krrrrrttt!" She drew a finger across her throat. "That's why you need training!"

"Okay, okay..." the CPU sighed in resignation. "Can you at least throw the balls a little slower?"

"Nepsy! Gearsy!" Uzume cried as she dashed into the room. "Turn on the TV! The aliens are making their public debut!"

"Really?!" Nepgear gasped, running to grab the remote and switch the channel on the TV above the nearby treadmill...

"This is Box News Network, no S-rank game breakers, just fair and balanced news!" the female NPC reporter announced. "I'm currently standing in front of LASA headquarters, where an incredible development has taken place! It seems the Truth is very much Out There, as we have just confirmed that extraterrestrial beings have made first contact with the space team! They apparently intercepted the satellite that was launched by LASA to the Animenga Star Cluster, and I am told that the cluster has a goddess and Oracle, just like the four nations of Gamindustri! And now, here with more information is our own CPU, Lady Vert!" The busty blonde promptly stepped into the camera's range, arms crossed and with a slight smile on her face. "Lady Vert, when were you first made aware of this development?"

"Thank you. Actually, due to navigational error, the aliens first touched down in Lowee and made contact with Blanc, who summoned me and the other two CPUs to meet with them," Vert explained. "The two aliens then traveled to Planeptune so that the Oracle there, Histoire, could teach them about the history of this world, before coming here to Leanbox..."

"So can we assume that they will visit Lastation as well?"

"That's the plan," Vert confirmed. "And I feel I must stress that these aliens have no ill intentions towards our world, so anyone afraid of abduction or dissection can rest easy..."

"So what do these aliens look like, and why are you keeping them out of the public eye?" the reporter pressed.

"Well, they look human enough, though they're technically in disguise," the CPU replied. "However, they have informed me that many denizens in the Animenga cluster are as human as you are, or quite close. In fact, Neptune has met with another alien that arrived afterward, and she too looks indistinguishable from any other human..."

"So are there any other aliens that will be arriving? And you didn't answer my earlier question about the aliens not appearing in person..."

"Nothing concrete at the moment," the busty blonde shook her head. "As for not appearing in person... look behind you."

"Awww! You ruined it!" A voice spoke up behind the NPC, causing her to yelp and quickly whirl around, revealing Haruhi standing there. "Well, anyway... Hi, I'm Haruhi, the goddess of the Animenga cluster! First off the bat, I'm not a CPU like Vert, so I don't depend on citizen's faith to sustain my existence..."

"O-oh, I see," the reporter grunted, a little shaken.

"You'll have to excuse her, she's a bit of a prankster," Vert said.

"Yeah, well, with all the crap I deal with back home, I gotta keep happy somehow. Laughter is the best medicine, you know," Haruhi said with a wink.

"I-I see..." the NPC female nodded, trying to compose herself. "S-so, are you the only goddess in the whole cluster?"

"Well..." Haruhi took on a contemplative pose. "There is one other that I know about, but she only watches over four specific planets, and she's kinda aloof. Not to mention beyond human comprehension. We've kinda agreed to leave each other alone... I mean, it's kind of a bad idea to associate to close with someone who's named after nightmares..."

"So is your true form beyond mortal comprehension?"

Haruhi glanced over at Vert, who frowned and shook her head. "Well, not exactly, but it can be a bit overwhelming..." The seven-eyed mask appeared in her hand. "This is kinda what my real face looks like."

"S-seven eyes?!" the reporter grunted.

"I know, gives new meaning to the term 'all-seeing goddess,' right?" the brunette deadpanned. Letting the mask vanish, she continued, "Now you see why I took on a human form... as for that other alien who arrived in Planeptune later, I instructed her to stay there and look after Neptune after she and her sister nearly got assassinated by a ninja..."

"Assassinated?!" the NPC recoiled.

"Yes, as I'm sure you know by now, a new terrorist group has arisen in Gamindustri, calling themselves the House of Humiliation, or Ho-Hum for short," Vert took over. "They have also attempted to assassinate CPU Candidate Uni in Lastation, as well as tried to place us and our subordinates into humiliating situations, hence their name."

"Not to mention that ninja turned my Oracle into an ice cube!" Haruhi growled in mild anger.

"Oh my, is she all right?!"

"She's fine now," the alien nodded, putting her hands behind her head. "Only reason she's not here with me at the moment is because she's a bit camera shy... Still, any help we can offer..."

"That's appreciated, but not really necessary," Vert abruptly cut her off. "As you just said, we CPUs are dependent on the faith of our citizens to survive... so how would it reflect on us if we had to rely on aliens to resolve this conflict?"

"They attacked my Oracle!" Haruhi shot back. "And they took lewd photos of your Oracle too, so I think you would understand how I feel!"

"S-so you think this terrorist group was behind those unflattering pictures of your Oracle and bodyguard?" the reporter stepped in to try and defuse the tension.

"I don't think, I know, because I confronted them personally," the CPU stated firmly. "Unfortunately, they managed to escape, but we have put BOLOs out on the currently known members..."

"Well, at least let us help with the investigation," Haruhi proposed, "but we'll leave the take-down to you and your fellow CPUs. Would that work?"

"...That is acceptable," Vert agreed. "Perhaps once you're done here, you can head to Lastation to help Noire investigate the attack on Uni."

"Sure thing," Haruhi nodded. "Well, anyway, I'm gonna go back to the LASA building, I kinda wanted to see how their space technology matches up with back home. See ya!" With that, she promptly walked off-camera.

"I'm sorry about that, I didn't mean to argue with her on-camera like that," Vert apologized. "Hopefully, once this conflict is resolved, we can have an official delegation from Animenga's government or governments to establish official ties, but as I said, nothing's been set in stone yet."

"Well, that would certainly be an event for the history books," the reporter mused. "Let's hope that said governments have benevolent intentions..."

"Well, again, to set the public's minds at ease, I was informed that any spaceships from that cluster would not be capable of making the trip here to Gamindustri without Haruhi's assistance..."

"But what about that one alien that arrived later?"

"She's a special case, she's a disciple of Haruhi herself," Vert explained. "Well, I think I've taken enough of your time, we have to get back to the investigation of the House of Humiliation..."

"Well, good luck with that, Lady Vert. And thank you!" the reporter nodded to her as she left.

"I guess that's it," Nepgear said as she switched off the TV. "Let's hope nobody panics over this development..."

"Well, maybe we should go out to the streets and ask people what they think," Neptune suggested. "And take DB here with us, so they understand these aliens aren't like, the brain-sucking kind or whatever..."

"Good idea, Nepsy!" Uzume nodded.

"But what about your training?" Dragon Ball asked.

"We can pick it up tomorrow!" the CPU proclaimed. "Gotta make sure the people don't panic, after all!"

"If Histoire was here, she'd accuse you of trying to avoid work again," Nepgear sighed.

"Hey, the day's still young, so maybe we can pick up the training again when we get back, before dinnertime!" Uzume proposed.

"That works for me!" Dragon Ball agreed.

"Aw nuts, foiled again!" Neptune sighed. "You guys know me too well..." The losing horn from 'The Price Is Right' promptly played in the background... "Neppit, author, stop plaguing my life with incidental music!"

*Lastation Basilicom, Noire's office*

"So there are actually seven Demon Lords?!" Noire gasped in incredulity.

"Yes, but on the upside, they don't tend to get along with each other very well," Sistermon Ciel explained. "So it's very possible this Demon Lord was acting entirely on her own..."

"Well, hopefully they only show up as bonus boss fights unrelated to the storyline," Uni spoke up.

"You've been hanging around Neptune and Nepgear too much," Noire sweat-dropped.

(Pot, meet kettle,) Uni thought to herself, but kept quiet.

"Anyway, according to what I heard from Vert, this Demon Lord Digimon started out as a different demon's pet cat," Noire continued, "from another world entirely..."

"You called her BlackGatomon, which is indeed a black cat of sorts," Ciel nodded. "Which mean the Demon Lord form she took was most likely that of Lilithmon, Demon Lord of Lust. Which is fortunate for us, as she's actually the weakest of the seven..."

"Even so, she almost killed Vert by herself, but Neptune and Vert working together managed to take her down," Noire expounded. "So if all four of us CPUs got together, she wouldn't stand a chance..."

"Might explain why she joined up with Ho-Hum," Uni suggested. "Those guys would have knowledge of this world that she didn't have..."

"Yes, and also knowledge about your abilities, so she wouldn't be caught off-guard so easily next time," Sistermon Ciel concurred.

"Yeah, but you can help us out dealing with her, right?" the CPU Candidate suggested.

"I will gladly offer what assistance I can," the nun nodded. "However, I am only a Champion-level Digimon, and while BlackGatomon is technically on the same level, Lilithmon is two tiers above me..."

"So how many levels or tiers of Digimon are there?" Noire inquired.

"Six tiers, starting with In-Training I and II, which are basically the equivalent of newborns and toddlers," Ciel explained. "The next stage is Rookie, where Digimon forms begin varying widely, then Champion, which is usually the adult form. The next stage after that is Ultimate, which is rare for many Digimon to reach naturally, and only by surviving harsh training and several battles. The final stage, the Mega level, was once thought of as a myth, as very few Digimon ever reach such a level naturally..."

"And Lilithmon is a Mega-level," Noire concluded. "So if she ever reaches that level again, we can't hold back at all... Still, even if you can't match her at full-power, at least now we understand her true nature a little better, thanks to you..."

"So what about that virus you drove off?" Uni asked next.

"Kuramon, a data-devouring Digimon born of pure malice," the nun explained. "Fortunately, it's an In-Training I-level, so it's easily handled by the likes of me... we might have problems if it starts to evolve, however. We should start scanning the network for the few that escaped..."

"Right, so you can nip them in the bud," Noire nodded. "I'll go and contact Cybercrime at once..."

*Ho-Hum HQ*

"Nyaaa, the blood's rushing to my head, meow!" BlackGatomon wailed as she hung upside-down by her tail, a rope tied to said tail from the ceiling.

"Now then, you will confess your knaveries willingly," said MAGES. as she stepped forward, "or you shall wish that it was a cold day in hell..." The end of her wand lit up with fire, slowly closing in on the kitty...

BlackGatomon sweated profusely, feeling her whiskers starting to burn... "OK, OK, I'll talk! I made a virus to attack the Leanbox space team's computers, meow!" The fire promptly halted, though still uncomfortably close.

"Did it work?" Overlord Momus asked.

"For a few hours, b-but then it just vanished, meow!" the black cat yelled. "I think that alien goddess must have destroyed it somehow! B-but I don't think she was able t-to trace it, meow!"

"Did you send this virus anywhere else?" Momus pressed.

"I s-sent it to th-the Lastation Basilicom's s-server, meow! But those ones got deleted by a Sistermon! She's a Digimon like myself, meow!"

"...MAGES., step back," Momus ordered, the witch promptly backing off as the Ho-Hum leader pressed a lever, lowering the rope BlackGatomon was tied to a foot or so, enabling him to pick up the cat and turn her upright. "Explain. What is a 'Sistermon'?"

"Ugh..." the Digimon groaned as she shook her head, before replying, "Sh-she's a Digimon that looks like a nun, but knows how to fight, meow! There's a few different kinds, I think this one is the Ciel kind, she uses a sword and daggers to fight, meow! But what really worries me is who they're associated with..."

"Go on..."

"W-well, back when I still lived in the Digital World, when I was just a little Salamon, I heard tales of these 'royal knights' that protected the peace, meow," BlackGatomon explained. "And that some of them were assisted by Sistermons... I'm afraid of what'll happen if she decides to call in these royal knights, it could mean Game Over for us all, meow!"

"So what would you suggest?" Overlord Momus asked in a neutral tone.

"Well, if were up to me, I'd say take her out now, before she has the chance to call for backup, meow..."

"Fortunate for us that you are not in charge, then," the horned man quipped. "MAGES., cut her loose." The Mad Magician directed her fire to the rope tied to BlackGatomon's tail, freeing the kitty. "After all, you yourself admit that these 'royal knights' were just tales that you heard... So, before we fly off the handle, we should find more about this Sistermon..."

"Well, maybe that Generic Soldier could spy on her, meow," the evil Digimon suggested.

"Exactly what I was thinking," Momus nodded. "Dr. Pop, go and contact Generic Soldier #20 in Lastation...Also, see if any traces of that virus remain on the Lastation Internep..."

"As you wish," the Mad Magician bowed briefly, before leaving.

"So, does this mean I'm off the hook?" BlackGatomon said hopefully.

"...not quite. Citrus!"

"Coming!" Peashy dashed into the room. "What's going on, Mom-Us?"

"Take BlackGatomon into your room and... play with her," the Ho-Hum leader tossed the cat to her.

"Yay! I get to play with kitty!" the child CPU exclaimed happily, easily carrying the Digimon over her shoulder despite almost being the same size. "Let's play football! You can be the quart-back, and I'll be the tackle!"

"Nooooooo!" BlackGatomon screeched as she was carried out of the room...

"Take care not to damage her collar!" Momus called after them.

*To be continued...*