A car horn is what initially interrupts my rem cycle, but it's the insistent sounds of traffic that pulls me towards consciousness. Slowly working my heavy eyelids open, I snap them closed again immediately when the morning sunrays stun my cornea.
Where the hell am I? my sleep-addled mind tries to work out.
As I creep closer to full wakefulness, my memory sharpens on the events of the night before. The dinner. A party. Tova, Tova's Cinna's niece. The kiss…oh yeah, the kiss. A dark porch, green eyes shining, soft tentative lips. My stomach flips uncomfortable at the memory, so I chose to push it to the back burner of my mind so can fully devote attention to it when I'm fully awake. My thoughts tumble forward past the kiss and the party and eventually lands on the image of a sparkling pool and 3 feet propped up by a fire. Any lethargy my brain had been wading through is instantly dissolved and I register for the first time a weight draped across my lap.
Sun blindness be damned, I force my eyelids open and they let loose a torrent of tears at the pain, but I quickly rub them away. There, toes tucked under my left forearm, are two small feet. My breath catches in my chest and my heart pounds wildly as my eyes traveling up muscular calves two tanned knees and toned thighs all tangled in pink satin. The rays of morning catch on silvery threads of the sash that wraps around a small waist and there I pause. I know what I'm about to see, and it causes my hands to sweat. Swallowing around a lump the size of my fist, I force my gaze onward. A graceful neck, full pink lips, a delicate nose, long dark lashes arched across sleep flushed cheek. Dark hair cascaded across a teal pillow and surrounded her face like a halo. She looks peaceful, calm, angelic.
My eyes slide close, my heart pounds so hard in my chest I feel like it's about to jump out of my chest. Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap! I scream in my head. This was so dangerous. Fuck, what if I had woken up mutt? I chastise myself. Yes, we've managed a few fleeting touches, but this….this so not the same thing! How irresponsible could I be? I'm a moron! As the accusation tumbles around in my head, my breathing must become erratic because my vision gets blurry. I lay my head back and try to regain control over my breathing and start with a new mantra.
Everything is fine. She is safe. You are you. Everything is fine. She is safe. You are you. She is safe. You are you. She is safe. She is safe. She is safe.
My vital functions returning to normal, I chance opening my eyes again. It's not a dream, Katniss still lies sleeping in my lap. Her face is the perfect expression of peace. The tranquil continues, make me smile, and oddly causes a surge of pride to run through me.
It's no secret that, like myself, Katniss still suffers from horrifying dreams most nights. We spent too many burly eyed morning looking at each other over breakfast to not acknowledge our struggles, so seeing her so peaceful while curled up next to me, well, I can't help but wonder if it has to do with my presence. As a prideful smile pulls at my lips at the thought, a barrage of old memories flood over me. I've known, in an academic sense, for a while now that Katniss and I platonically shared a bed from time to time before the quell and I've had tainted memories to go with them, but suddenly it's as if a curtain has been pulled back. I remember everything. Every night we climbed in between the sheets together, every time we grasped each other after a nightmare…every morning I woke to the feeling of her pressed against me. So maybe not so much with the platonic feelings ffor me back then, I think, replaying one specific morning and sleep eschewed night gown revealing just sliver of the curve of a breast. The image playing in my head causes guilt to sprout deep in my gut and heat to raise up the back of my neck. I'm still struggling with my thoughts when the brunette draped across me begins to stir from her slumber. I watch Katniss closely as her drowsy eyelids lazily flutter open to reveal her unique grey orbs. Surprised shock flashes on her face, but she quickly replaces it with a soft, shy smile.
"Good Morning," I offer, smiling down at her.
"Morning," she returns with a lazy stretch. "Wow, so we totally fell asleep out here," she quips through a yawn.
I find her lack of reaction a little confusing, but honestly, I don't want to focus on that emotion. No, I want to revel in the closeness we are sharing.
"Did you sleep well?" I ask, plucking a wayward strain of hair from in front of her eyes.
She sighs happily, "Yeah, I did. Man, I haven't slept like that sin…." She begins but cuts herself off.
"Since before the Quarter Quell," I finish for her.
She nods, a blush creeping to her cheeks before I spot her thoughts as they pass over her face, "Oh, Peeta, are you okay?" she asks, worry flashing in her dawn gray eyes.
I run a hand down her cheek. "I'm fine. I woke peacefully too," I reassure her. "But..." I add reluctantly.
"It could have gone the other way?" she says completing my sentence for me.
I shrug. "Truthfully, I don't know. I've been in a kind of transition lately. When I'm awake, I can tell when things are going to go sideways, but waking up it's not very predictable," I tell her honestly.
She considers my answer for a moment, "Perhaps something to discuss with your Doctor?" she suggests shyly.
Her suggestion eluding to this morning's event possibly returning to a regular habit at any point pleasantly surprises me, but my traderous brain flashes this morning's cleavage memories at me once again and I have to admit that resuming a sleeping arrangement with her requires more thought.
Behind us the door opens, creaking loudly in the quiet that's settled between Katniss and me.
"Oh, there you…are," I hear Effie exclaims, her voice dipping when she takes in our state. I look over my shoulder and find her with her hand over her heart and smile on her face, but when she catches my gaze, she immediately drops her hand and erases the pleased look from her countenance.
The door squeaks again and Haymitch barging on the patio behind Effie. Our gaze locks and Haymitch rolls his eyes theatrically. "Oh, perfect," he grumbles, throwing up his hands in the air.
I duck my head and sneak a peek at Katniss who seems to be taking the whole situation in stride, a smirk on her face and all.
"When you two are able to pull yourselves together, meet us in the kitchen," Haymitch grouses, then turns and drags Effie back into the apartment.
"It's never a good sign when Haymitch is up before noon," I sniff.
"Did he seem hungover to you?" Katniss asks, wiggling her toes under my arm.
I smile down at her and pinch her on one of her big toes. "Not particularly…" I draw out playfully.
"He wasn't hungover yesterday morning either," she says, pulling herself to a sitting position, but still managing to keep her legs draped over my lap.
I squint at her, "Yeah, and?"
She shrugs, "And nothing, it's just odd," she says through a mischievous smile.
I smirk, "Very," I return recalling all the oddities I've noticed in him since our arrival. "Have you noticed that he's been…" I start but the sentence is interrupted by the squeak of the screen door again.
"Pulling yourselves together doesn't take that long! You're not even naked" Haymitch growls, "Get in here" he demands, letting the door slam behind him again.
Katniss hides a laugh behind her hand and pulls her legs from my lap so I can reach over to grab my leg from where it lies abandoned.
"I'll have put that nakedness clause to work use in the future," she mutters as she pulls her gown down from where it has ridden up around her hips over the night. I freeze mid latching my leg on to stare at her up at her, amused by the comment. She immediately blushes so deeply it matches her dress. "I…I mean…you know when…when he's rushing me…out the…somewhere," she mumbles awkwardly as she stands to finish straightening her clothes. My heart beats a little quicker in my chest at her flustering retort. This is the Katniss the old me remembers.
Pulling the last strap on my prostatic tight, I clamor to my feet to stand up next to her.
"Ready?" she asks, dipping her face to hide her blush.
I look down at her pink-tinted cheeks and have to bite back a chuckle. "Let's go." I say, maneuver her around furniture towards the back of the apartment. She's pulling the door open when I reach over her head to push it close it again. I don't want the morning to end just yet. She spins around to confront me but with my hand on the door she's a lot closer than she realizes so she has no choice but to look up at me. She smells like perfume, chlorine, and outside, I think, and silently wish I could bottle it like the candles and lotions I bought from Honey the night I was lost in Panem. I offer her a warm grin, but she just raises an eyebrow at me. "I just wanted to ask you for a favor before we head in," I say.
"Okay," she drawls out.
"Do you think you might be able to avoid using the naked excuse in front of me in the future, I mean I am a teenage boy," I suggest in a teasing tone, hoping to break the tension she has decided to put between us because of a silly off-handed statement. Her cheeks glow, but she straightens her spine and a smirk pulls at her features.
"Peeta you'll be 20 in a month," she counters with a raised eyebrow.
I chuckle in amusement, at the rebound. I just shrug and reach to pull open the door behind me, "Yeah, well let's just say that certain parts of the male brain remain perpetually 16 years old," I smirk and glide past her into the apartment.
Her face turns fiery red and her mouth hangs slightly agape.
"What? It's the truth," I laugh looking back at her. "Come on, get in here before Haymitch sics Effie on us," I urge, feeling pretty proud of the scarlet stain I put her features.
She glares at me then sighs theatrically. "I'll never understand males," she mumbles and pushes past me. I chuckle and follow her down the hall to the dining room where we find Effie and Haymitch sitting with full plates in front of them, each engrossed in a newspaper.
Katniss heads directly for the buffet to fill a plate and I sit down across from Haymitch. "So…." I drawl out.
Haymitch peeks over the top of his paper at me, then watches as Katniss places a cup of tea in front of me and her plate down at her spot before clasping into her chair.
I glance over at Effie, but she's worrying her bottom lip. I'm officially nervous.
Haymitch clears his throat and carefully folds his paper in half and places it in between Katniss and I. "Thought you'd like to see the morning headlines," he says leaning back in this chair.
It the Panem Times and the headlines read in big bold letters "The Capitol Welcomes District Conference Teams with a Bash to Remember!" Below that are a number of brightly colored pictures of the party. My eyes slip down page but stalls at the picture of Gale and Katniss standing close to one another, his hand on her arm. The lighting of the photo is such that Gale's face is obscured in shadow, so much so that I'm sure that casual reader wouldn't be able to tell who it is, but I recognize him. The caption below it reads, "Is Katniss Everdeen in a love spat with this Mystery man?" I quickly glance over the article. Apparently, the photographer never identified the mystery man, but the article goes on to speculate about their early escape from the party.
I look up at Katniss and find her looking peeked. I push the paper away and clear my throat. "This is just speculation, they're looking for a way to pad the morning news," I state, sitting back in my chair and take up my tea for a sip.
Haymitch reaches over and takes the paper from Effie's hands and tosses it in front of me. "I'm not done," he says evenly. The People of Panem Gazette slides across the table, stopping between Katniss and I. I look down at a grainy picture and my teacup begins trembling at my lips. There below papers header is an image of Tova and I kissing on the porch in the dark. The image is blurry but is clear enough to positively I.D. Tova and I. I set the cup down carefully, and slowly lift my eyes to Katniss's. Her face is white, her gray eyes wide. I shake my head hoping to loosen the words I need to explain the evidence glaring up at us in black and white. I've yet to devote any real time to thinking about the moment on the patio, let alone am I ready to deal with it in the press.
Haymitch takes the paper from in front of me, and reads the headline, "Peeta Mellark falls for his Designer."
"It's not…what it looks like," I mutter.
Haymitch's eyebrows raise, and he grabs a remote next to his plate. After a push of a button, the picture above the buffet disappears and is replaced by a television screen. There, on a morning chat show the hosts are watching what appears to be surveillance footage from the porch. There isn't any sound, but the super clear film of us kissing makes up for that lacking. I bury my face in my hands. "On the bright side, no one's talking about your little dance," Haymitch gripes, flipping off the TV.
"Haymitch, a little compassion," Effie chides.
I lift my face from my palms and look over at him. "How do we manage it?" I ask quietly.
Haymitch takes a breath and looks from me to Katniss. "Well," he drawl out, "I think the thing with Katniss and Gale will die before it even gets off the ground. They don't even know who the mystery guy is so they don't have any ammo, but the film, it clearly shows that it's you and Tova. It's going to have legs and it's going to distraction from what we all agreed to come here to do!" he growls, slapping his hand to the table. I jump at the sound, but quickly pulls himself together.
"At least s we don't have to worry about the star-crossed lover's issue now do we," Katniss says, her voice tight. I hazard a look at her but she's got her eyes focused on Haymitch.
Haymitch considers her statement and nods. "I suppose that's true," he agrees.
Effie clears her throat, "Perhaps some well places leaks could possibly help?" she offers.
"What do you mean by "well-placed leaks?" I ask.
"I know quite a few people in the media, we might be able to turn this story in a way that suits our goal. There is a lot to be gained with some well-placed gossip," she explains.
I feel my brow furrow. "What kind of story? There isn't anything to tell at the moment."
"Reality doesn't matter, you of all people should know that!" Haymitch says flatly.
I level my eyes at him, "Okay, so I don't feel like it's anyone's business!" I grind out.
Haymitch snorts. "Then kiss your new girlfriend in private quarters next time! In the meantime, we have to figure out what we're going to feed the beast."
My blood pressure rises. I open my mouth to respond, but before the words can leave my mouth, Katniss is pushing away from the table. "Since my issue is resolved, you'll have to excuse me," she says, her voice hard. Shoving the chair in harder than necessary, she turns and quickly disappears down the hall.
My fist comes down on the table rattling the dishes and silverware. "Damn it!" I growl, silencing the remaining member of the dining room.