noun: period of being young

Tsuna blinks bleary eyes, heavy with sleep and tiredness, but he won't sleep—can't sleep, not since he came to the future. Gokudera sits in the chair next to his bed, sleeping, his arms crossed on the bed, his head hidden in them. His chest rises up and down steadily, and the beeps of the medical equipment are the only sounds in the room.

Tsuna grits his teeth, getting out of bed as carefully and silently as he can. His shoulder throbs painfully through the painkillers and Rain flames, but he bites his tongue and keeps moving, keeping an eye on Gokudera's sleeping form. He stands, sweat running down the side of his face, barefoot on the mercifully cold floor.

"Tenth." Tsuna didn't even make it a step past him, and he smiles. Gokudera sits up straight in his chair, and maybe if they weren't in the dark he might have said other words. "Tenth, I'm not going to stop you to go see them, but... You're hurt too. You should rest—need rest. Sleep."

"You're right." Tsuna can't make out Gokudera's face properly from where he stands, but he imagines either surprise or relief on his face, maybe both. "I will. I'll go see them, and will be right back. To rest and sleep."

"I'll wait for you."

"I'll be right back," Tsuna says again, as soft as Gokudera, and switches the light on for him on his way out.

Lambo's and I-Pin's room is in the same hallway as his, both of them in the medical bay too. The light shines under their door, happy not-so hushed chatter filtering through.

Lambo is the one to answer when he knocks on the door. He lies in his bed, awake, as well as I-Pin, sitting on her bed next to his. Yamamoto sits on a chair between both their beds, loosely holding Shigure Kintoki in his arms, and he grins sheepishly when they catch each other's eye.

"You're the adult here, you know," Tsuna teases.

"Ew, 'adult'," Yamamoto and Lambo say at the exact same time, making a face, before laughing.

"It's not even true, Tsuna-nii!" Lambo adds. "We're all the same age right now."

Tsuna drags a chair next to Lambo's bed—Yamamoto stands to help, but he reassures him with a smile—, then sits. Lambo is all smiles, his eyes shining happily, but there's concern in the way he keeps them on him. Tsuna's been told he collapsed as soon as they made it into the safety of the base, but he looks much better already in between the bandages and band-aids, a healthier color to his skin.

I-Pin's watching him too, a slight frown between her brows. Her knees are pulled up against her chest, her arms around them. Her hair is loose, beautiful, wavy black strands falling along her back. She looks away as soon as they meet eye, and Tsuna doesn't know if she had the time to see his smile.

"You should be resting," he says to Lambo, but talking about both—all three of them.

"Look who's talking!" Lambo shots back cheekily.

Tsuna playfully ruffles his hair with his good arm. "You brat, is that any way to talk to your big brother?"

Lambo laughs, then sticks out his tongue. From the corner of his eye Tsuna sees a smile pulls at I-Pin's lips too, and it loosens the knot in his stomach a little.

"You should be resting too, Tsuna."

Tsuna nods, looking up at Yamamoto. "I will. I just… I just came to say goodnight. I'm fine. Really," he adds when Yamamoto doesn't look convinced, and smiles, "I'm fine. Just give me five minutes?"

Yamamoto's face softens. "Of course! Just don't push yourself too hard, alright?"

"I couldn't even if I wanted to," Tsuna jokes. "I'm expected back soon."

"Oh, that's reassuring to hear!" Yamamoto laughs, then stands, stretching his arms and back. "It's the perfect time for a bathroom break, then. I leave the kiddos to you in the meantime."

"Not a kid," Lambo and even I-Pin say in the flat tone of habit, and Yamamoto and him exchange a knowing, amused look.

Yamamoto squeezes his good shoulder before leaving, and a beat of silence lingers in the room.

"How are your injuries?" Tsuna asks.

"The worse," Lambo complains. He kicks his feet under the blanket, but then winces, stopping. He catches Tsuna's eye again, and smooths his wince into a cocky, confident smile instead. "But I'm the Toughest, Strongest In The World, so of course it's nothing for me."

"Of course," Tsuna agrees softly. "You've grown, Lambo." Lambo beams, and Tsuna wishes the words didn't taste like loss on his tongue.

Crybaby Lambo, who always tries to hold it in, but always, always comes running to either their mom or him, crying at the top of his voice at his every trouble, big and small ones alike.

[Where were his tears?]

His little Lightning made of the softest edges, who cares little about living up to the tough expectations, who avoids needless pain whenever he can, but is reliable nonetheless.

That's all Tsuna asks of him, and it's already more than Lambo should be asked of. And surely, surely his future self is the same.

[Why is it then it's carved all over his skin how strong and brave and tough he had to be?]

"Tsuna-nii." I-Pin's voice is so quiet, Tsuna almost doesn't catch it. "How's Kyoko-nee?"

Tsuna makes his voice cheerful and confident. "She's fine—they both are. The Kyoko-chan of this time twisted her ankle, but otherwise wasn't hurt. I'm sure she's being taken care of well in the past."

"It's my fault." I-Pin curls tighter on herself, shaking. "Because I could only think about fighting them. About making them pay."

Making them pay.

Tsuna recoils, can't help it. The words sound so strange in I-Pin's voice, I-Pin who's supposed to work part-time at a ramen shop to save money for her college tuition, I-Pin who's supposed to have quit the mafia.

Lambo says nothing, but his face is cold and harsh, understanding, approving.

"I… She could have been—" I-Pin laughs bitterly, weak and tearful. "Master would have been disappointed in me."

"You're wrong," Tsuna says, soft but firm. "You helped Lambo brought them to safety. You wanted to fight, but you stood in front of them, even after Yamamoto, Gokudera and I came, because you wanted them safe more."

Tsuna stands, and I-Pin curls up on herself more as he comes closer, hiding her face in her knees. She has bandages everywhere her medical gown isn't covering her skin, her torn apart changshan neatly folded on the chair next to her bed.

Tsuna has been told she collapsed the moment the battle was over, that only her Sun Flames were keeping her standing. He's been told she was already fighting Millefiore before she was asked to go look for Kyoko and Haru, [was killing them, picking them up one by one for what they did to her master.]

[I-Pin, third out of more than fifty thousand people for the potential to become a promising assassin, but she wasn't supposed to ever fulfill that potential.]

Tsuna sits next to her on his good side, and gently strokes her hair. "Even through your pain, you stayed the same kind and thoughtful I-Pin. Your master would only be proud of you. I am only proud of you."

A choked sob tears out of I-Pin's throat, and it's like a dam bursts. She throws herself at him, crying, wrapping her arms around his waist. "Tsuna-nii, I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

"It's okay," Tsuna soothes. He holds her tight, one arm around her back, the other on the back of her head. "I'm sorry for your loss, I-Pin-chan."

I-Pin's master died, same as the other Arcobaleno, same as Reborn. Yamamoto's father died, as well as so many other people they knew, and even his mom and dad, for all he knows. There isn't anything even remotely okay about any of this, but what else could he say?

The mattress shifts, and without a word Lambo sits on I-Pin's other side, leans against her, and rests his head against her shoulder blade. A painful smile pulls at Tsuna's lips.

His siblings, fifteen in this world, same as him, so different from him. Hardened fighters—killers—, and in this terrible world Tsuna can't imagine how heavy the word must be.

They've grown, but he never wanted them to grow like that.

Who allowed it to happen?

[Is it because of the state of this world? Is it only because of it?]

Pink smoke surrounds them, and when it disappears five years old Lambo and I-Pin are still fast asleep. A scream rises up Tsuna's throat, or maybe a sob, maybe both. He expected it, but he hoped—

Tsuna gently holds them in his arms, curls around them, careful not to hurt or awake them. He shakes, dread pooling in his guts.

[Where was he when their childhood was robbed away from them?]

Tsuna can't let this future hurt them, can't let it scar them. He needs to protect them, if only them.

Oh please, please, let him be able to protect them.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Any and all review are appreciated.

Thank you for reading!

- Hope