TW: Mental Breakdown

noun: understanding

"Sasagawa Ryohei, gate crashing!"

Tsuna and the others whirl their chair around, and stumble up. Ryohei stands in the doorway of the control room, carrying Chrome in his arms.

"Onii-san!" Tsuna blurts out happily. He looks down at Chrome, and his voice turns worried. "Chrome!" She's badly hurt, looking exhausted, cradling an owl in her arms, but he trusts Ryohei would look more worried if there was reason to.

"Lawn-…!"

"Senpai!"

"Onii-chan!" Kyoko shouts, stepping forwards, holding her hands to her chest.

Ryohei smiles. "Oh, Kyoko… You've become so short…"

Tsuna breathes out a laugh, while Yamamoto chuckles.

"What, he actually noticed?" Gokudera taunts for the room at large, but there's no heat to it. "I guess there's still hope for him."

Haru promptly stomps on his foot, and acts clueless as Gokudera curses. They bicker, and Tsuna takes in the scene, takes them all in, grinning.

"How is she?" Kusakabe asks, coming from behind Tsuna to stand next to him.

"She needs extreme medical attention right now."

"I'll take care of her," Bianchi calls out, walking into the control room. "Good to see you, Ryohei."

Ryohei turns around, grinning. "Good to see you too, Bianchi! Extremely happy to be back. Thank you." He hands Chrome to her, but before she can walk away, Kusakabe raises his hand.

"Sawada-san, about Mukurowl… It looks like a box weapon, after all." Tsuna looks up curiously. "Are you sure we shouldn't investigate it further?"

"Yes," he says right away. "It belongs to Chrome, doesn't it? I don't think she'd like it if we did anything to it without her permission…"

Kusakabe looks considering, but then a little smile pulls at his lips. "Very well, then." He lowers his hand, and Bianchi nods at them before walking away.

"Onii-chan!" Kyoko shouts again, her voice choked with tears, throwing herself in his arms as soon as he turns back around. "I'm so glad you're alright!"

Ryohei immediately turns flustered, wrapping his arms around her. "Don't—don't cry, Kyoko! As you can see, I'm alive and kicking, okay?"

"Okay…" Kyoko nuzzles her face into Ryohei's chest, tears at the corners of her eyes, and Tsuna smiles, happy for her.

It feels like they're back in the past, seeing the two of them together like that, especially when Ryohei looks exactly the same as back then.

He's not fine—how could he be?—, Tsuna isn't fooled, sees the tense line of his shoulders, the slight frown between his brows as he looks at Kyoko, noticed the way he has yet to look at him properly.

But he's there, steady as he has always been, standing tall and strong in the face of this future they have to fought against, and he has been nothing but smiles and straightforward, determined eyes since he appeared. His ever constant uplifting energy washed over him the second he gate crashed in the control room, the ever constant warmth pouring out of him warming him up to the core.

The sun, his Sun, and how dearly Tsuna missed him.

"Lawn-head, she's fine!" Gokudera eventually says when it doesn't look like Ryohei will let go of Kyoko anytime soon. "Tell us why the hell does the Varia know about you coming here?"

"That's because I was with them, of course!" Ryohei says, pulling away from Kyoko. "I've also returned with a message."

Tsuna gaps, widening his eyes. "Onii-san was with the Varia?"

Reborn jumps on the table, then on Yamamoto's shoulder. "It's the instruction Belphegor mentioned, isn't it?"

"What could it be?" Yamamoto asks.

"I've forgotten it to the extreme!" Ryohei screams at the top of his voice, and despite how alarming it is, Tsuna relishes in the laughter startled out of his mouth. "Not to worry, though," he reassures, taking a paper out of his pocket, "because I extremely wrote it down. I have learned something these last ten years." He reads his note with furrowed brows, nodding along. "I see. I see." He puts a firm hand on Kyoko's and Haru's shoulder. "There was a sumo wrestling match in Italy I had to attend on official business!" he says too loudly, too cheerfully. Tsuna's smile falls from his face. His stomach twists, and he holds his hands over it, curling his fingers around his shirt. "It was really great, you know, Kyoko, Haru!" He laughs, seemingly not noticing the sudden dead silence in the room, and it rings loudly in Tsuna's ears.

Tsuna looks down, feeling colder and colder. He needs to tell him there's no need to lie anymore, to leave Kyoko and Haru aside, needs to tell him why there's no need for that anymore. The lump in his throat is too big for him to swallow, and he barely registers Yamamoto's hand on his back, doesn't feel soothed by it.

"Onii-chan," Kyoko says softly. "It's okay, we know, I know."

Tsuna doesn't look up, only has their legs in his line of sight. Kyoko steps back, Ryohei's arms falling to his sides.

"Kyoko?"

"I know," she says again. Haru steps closer to her, takes her hand in hers, and Kyoko's voice grows stronger and firmer, if still soft and soothing. "About the mafia, about this future, about all of you."

Ryohei misses a beat. "Kyoko…" He laughs, or tries to, but the smile in his voice sounds strained, his cheerfulness like fear. "What are you talking about? Are Haru and you playing a mafia game together or something? I extremely didn't know it was your thing!"

Kyoko raises her voice, pleading. "Onii-chan, I know! About everything, okay? So—" Another beat, and then her voice is quiet again. "So you don't have to lie anymore, okay?"

"Kyoko, what are you talking about?" Ryohei screams, so afraid, lurching forwards, reaching up again. He shakes her. "You can't—!"

"Ryohei." Reborn's voice leaves no room for arguments, and he lets it linger in the air. "You heard her. This is how it is now, nothing you can do about it anymore." He jumps down from Yamamoto's shoulder, then walks past them out of the control room without looking back. "Come, all of you. We'll be better seated in the meeting room. And I believe there are important matters we need to discuss."

Kusakabe, Lal and Giannini follow after him in silence, leaving them behind. Kyoko's the first of them to move, Ryohei's arms falling at his sides again. She leaves with Haru by her side, neither of them saying a word either.

Ryohei doesn't move, neither does Yamamoto nor Gokudera. Tsuna just needs a moment more so he can move again, needs for Ryohei to do something, to react in any way first so he can move again.

He does, turning around to face him, his hands curled into fists at his sides. Tsuna looks up then, meets his eyes head-on, because it's the least he owes him.

Ryohei's face is blank with forced composure and restraint, his eyes hard, but still familiar in the last silver of hope he can see in them. It disappears the second their eyes meet, and Tsuna wonders how obviously the guilt and confession are written all over his face, are screaming at him from his body language.

The sun, his Sun, but the sun can burn too.

Yamamoto steps in front of him, blocking Ryohei from his sight. Gokudera steps forwards, to stand nose to nose with Ryohei if Tsuna knows them at all.

"You heard Reborn-san," he says, his voice faking casualness, normalcy. "Let's go before you somehow destroy the note and forget important intel."

It takes a moment that has Tsuna tensing, but thankfully so Ryohei walks away without getting in a fight with Gokudera, even if his relief's swallowed whole by his anxiety. Yamamoto wraps his arm around his shoulders, dragging him along too, and Gokudera falls in step on his other side as they walk past him.

They squeeze on one couch with Kyoko and Haru, Bianchi, Lal, Reborn, Kusakabe, and Giannini sitting on the other couch across the table between them. Ryohei stands against the desk's chair between the two couches, his arms crossed on his chest.

"Hibari should be here too," Reborn says from Bianchi's lap, looking at Kusakabe.

Kusakabe nods. "I've already notified him of Sasagawa-san's arrival, he should be on his way."

"Then I'll start." Ryohei marks a pause full of reticence, and Tsuna tightens his fists on his lap, averts his eyes to instead look down at the table. "I was acting as a messenger to the Tenth Boss to go to the Varia with regard to a certain matter…"

His voice's muddled to Tsuna's ears through the thick silence that chokes him, but at the same time crystal clear, and he can't make himself look up to meet anyone's eye. A smile fails to pull at his lips, tastes like ash in his mouth.

Tsuna should be used to this by now. None of his meetings with his Guardians from the future went well.

Ryohei talks about the allied families who know of their presence, tells them how Dino and his family are well, and his shoulders relax slightly, his breath coming out easier.

"The instruction to those of us here, the Tenth Boss' family, is this. In five days' time, we will raid the Millefiore's branch in Japan."

Tsuna widens his eyes, snapping his head up to look at Ryohei. "What? A raid?"

"That's right. This is the strategy—"

Tsuna stands. "But five days is way too soon! We can't—!"

"But if we miss this chance, there's no telling when we'll be ready to make an effective strike against the Millefiore again."

"The enemy could find our hideout anytime too," Lal agrees. "The faster we do this, the better."

Tsuna snaps his eyes to her, then to the others next to her, and realizes with horror they're all in agreement with the plan. "No…"

"Our objective was to take down Irie Shoichi, right?" Lal goes on. "It concurs completely!"

"No!" Tsuna shouts, and the room stills. "This kind of mafia war… You can't just… We can't—"

"Tsuna, calm down. This isn't nearly the kind of suicidal plan you think it is." Tsuna flinches at his words, but Reborn continues smoothly. "Don't tell me you have yet to notice?" he says, smiling.

Tsuna frowns. "What…?"

"All the Guardians are here, Tenth!" Gokudera fills in for him, and Tsuna turns to him to find him beaming.

Oh.

"Oh!" Yamamoto cheers. "That's right, we are." He wraps his hand around his wrist. "Tsuna, this is great!" Tsuna finds himself smiling back at him despite himself. He didn't even notice, but they really did gather all the Guardians together. "With all of us here, and the rings here…" Yamamoto squeezes his wrist, and Tsuna pulls his hand back to hold his hand properly. He tries to keep his smile on his face, but he can't.

"Still…" Kyoko and Haru put on a brave smile on their face as soon as he catches their eye, an encouraging one. They intertwined their hands, resting on their lap, ever so slightly shaking. Tsuna turns back to Ryohei. "Still!"

Ryohei, finally, looks him in the eye. He leans away from the chair, his arms falling at his sides. "There are still a few things we need to discuss, but let's leave that until later. Listen, Sawada." Tsuna straightens his back, beyond grateful for Yamamoto's hand in his. "This strategy will determine the survival of the Vongola. It's a very important battle. But whether to carry out the plan and how, will be your decision."

Tsuna frowns, incredulous. "Me?"

"The Vongola's upper echelon are currently in total chaos. It's not that they want to rely on you guys from the past either. The Varia have also taken their stance as the Ninth Boss' squad. There's no way they'd call off the entire strategy on your decision alone, right?" Tsuna says nothing, and for a brief moment, through the unwavering faith in Ryohei's eyes, the trust in his voice, the sun is only warm again. "But as long as the chief of this hideout is the Vongola Tenth Boss, he will make the decision. That's what I said to them to the extreme!"

Tsuna has to look away. How much is he regretting it now?

"You've grown up, Ryohei," Reborn says, and Tsuna finds it easy to smile despite everything else. Ryohei really did.

"Your deadline is the end of today," Ryohei finishes. "If you want to call it off, I'll convey the message to the heads."

The door opens, and Tsuna only catches a glimpse of Hibari's back as he closes it behind him.

Kuskabe stands, then nods. "We'll go first. Sawada-san, please let us know of any developments."

"That's how it is, Tsuna," Reborn says, and on cue Bianchi stands in turn. "First, think about how you are going to secure your fighting potential to my satisfaction in the next five days."

"In five days, we have to get Chrome recovered and wrap up the training for the rest of you too," Lal adds.

Tsuna says nothing, looks at no one.

Everyone leaves the room, Reborn, Bianchi, Lal, and Giannini, then eventually Kyoko and Haru too. Ryohei stays, like Tsuna knew he would, as well as Gokudera and Yamamoto.

Yamamoto stands, and wraps his arm around his shoulders. "Tsuna, you don't have to think about it right now, one day is plenty of time," he says cheerfully. "Let's focus on training first. When it comes to training, I'm sure we'll be fine! Right, Gokudera?

"R-right. Leave everything to us, Tenth!" He stands, takes a step forwards. "Let's go together."

"Thank you." Tsuna gently removes Yamamoto's arm from around his shoulders, then shifts so he can't see his face. He tries to put a smile in his voice, but it doesn't sound convincing even to his own ears. "Yeah, you're right. You go first, I'll be right behind you."

It takes a moment—two, but they leave the room too without a word. Ryohei walks to the couch in front of him when they do, and they sit face to face, Tsuna's head bowed down.

Ryohei cuts to the chase. "You told her?"

"I did. I had to."

"No, you didn't." Tsuna bites his lip, tensing his body so he doesn't flinch. "It's not like you plan to involve them any more than they have to, right? You chose to do it."

"They're already involved. They're here, aren't they? In this world that isn't theirs. In this terrible—"

"Look at me, Sawada." Tsuna bites his lip harder. He releases it from his teeth before it can bleed, and raises his head, his shirt bunched up in his fists. Ryohei crosses his arms on his chest, his back straight against the couch, his gray eyes like steel. "They were safe. They'll keep being safe, because we will see to it. I will see to it to the extreme."

"They weren't," Tsuna says, and it feels meaningless, feels like he's talking to a wall. "When they got here—when they appeared in the future, they were under attack, hunted by Millefiore men. They could almost have—" he cuts himself off.

"But they didn't, did they? Because you were there, all of you. Because you saw to it they stayed extremely safe."

"You don't understand." Ryohei's lips twitch, his fingers digging in his biceps, and it's a bit of a solace. "You weren't there. You don't know how close—What if I had failed?"

"You didn't."

"She was in danger, and she didn't even know to run—"

"And you won't, I know you won't."

"Sasagawa-san—" The name feels stranger in his mouth, bitter, cutting short anything else he was going to say. But it doesn't occur to him to call him anything else, not now, and the thought he might never be able to call him anything else clenches his heart.

"You didn't have to tell her anything!" Ryohei snaps, standing. He towers over him, his hands balled into fists, anger turning his features harsher.

Tsuna feels small under his gaze, feels consumed by the accusation in them.

The sun, his Sun, and for the first time he learns it can be scorching too.

"Yes I did!" he shouts back, turning desperate, pleading. His eyes sting. "What else choice I had? Safe? There's no safe place left in this world, isn't that the whole problem?"

"That wasn't your choice to make!"

Tsuna feels punched in the guts, all air leaving his lungs. He blinks, stunned, like a sudden cold shower poured down on him. "How was it not my choice to make? Who are you in the mafia for, if not for me?"

"Sawada, I trust you, I respect you, but I'm her brother. The least you could have done is talk about it with me first."

"Who are you making them lie to her too, if not me?"

"Sawada, she's just a kid!"

"So am I!" Tsuna screams, standing on unsteady legs. "I'm just fifteen!"

[Only thirteen when they sent a hitman to his home.

Did they hesitate, did his dad put up a fight, or was he the one to speak his name first?]

"I didn't ask to be sent here—for any of us to be sent here! I didn't want this, any of this! And now you all want me to decide if I should lead us all to our possible death?" He breathes heavily, but doesn't feel like he's breathing at all, a tightness in his chest that grows and grows and suffocates him.

[Did they care? Does anyone care?]

"I'm sorry she got sent here too, I'm sorry I had to tell her, I'm sorry I can't immediately bring her back to the past! I'm sorry I'm failing to meet your expectations, but I'm trying my best! I'm trying my best, alright?"

His words hurt to say, tear out of his choked up throat but sound loud and clear once out of his mouth, and it terrifies him to hear them. But it's incredibly relieving to hear them most of all, freeing to finally get the words out, like a dam filled to the brim finally breaking.

His cheeks are wet, his sight blurred, tinted orange, and he can't see Ryohei clearly anymore.

Is he still talking to a wall?

[Will anyone ever care?]

"I'm trying! I'm sorry this isn't enough, but I'm trying!" He's on the floor, curled over his himself, his hands clutching his chest. He doesn't remember falling. "I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying…" He feels as if under, can't hear his voice anymore but can't stop talking either. His chest's too tight, and he can't breathe anymore, but he can't stop talking. "I'm trying, I'm trying…"

"We know." A summer breeze washes over him, the heat of a hot milk chocolate cup against your skin warming him up inside, and the tightness in his chest loosens. Yamamoto wraps strong but gentle arms around him, holds him close against his chest. "You're doing enough, you are more than enough. It's okay, Tsuna, just breathe with me."

Tsuna sobs, tries to hold it back but it's like trying to swallow back the planet, and he lets go. A fiercer orange with a tint of blue obscures his sight, the carpet around him burning, burnt pieces of wood falling from under the table.

Tsuna bursts into tears, pressing against Yamamoto, trying to disappear in his arms. "I'm trying…" he chokes out through his tears.

"I know. And it's enough. It's the only thing that should be asked of you."

"I'm really… I'm so sorry…"

Yamamoto cups the back of his head, holds him tighter. "Don't be. Don't you even dare, you hear me? You have nothing to apologize for. Just breathe with me, Tsuna."

"Tsuna-nii!" tears-filled voices call out, and only as they climb up his legs to hug him around his waist, Tsuna hears his siblings' voice.

"Tsuna-nii, 别哭!

Tsuna blindly reaches for them with one arm, and holds them tight against him, feeling their bodies shake and jolt under their own tears. He lets go, and it's only pain and hurt and fears, doubts and guilt and apologies, and it doesn't feel like his tears will ever dry out.

"You're the Tenth Vongola Boss," Ryohei eventually says. "No one else but you can make that decision."

"Stop it," Haru immediately says, and it sounds so sad, but she's not asking, and the anger in her voice is unmistakable. "Sasagawa-san, please. Do you have to do this, even now?"

Ryohei marks a pause. "I don't understand to the extreme."

"This," she says, and for that one moment her anger flares clear in her voice, sounds more like accusation. "Looking at Tsuna-san, and seeing right through him. The Tsuna-san of this time might be the Vongola Boss, and our Tsuna-san might become the Vongola Boss too at some point, but this is just Tsuna-san. A student at Namimori Middle School, struggling with his grades. Our friend always facing his fears for us. A big brother who can't bring himself to ever say no to his siblings. His mother's oldest, and her only son for a long time. He's fifteen years old."

She falls quiet, and when she speaks up again, her voice sounds choked up. "You might not be terrified of this world, you might be used to it, know how to deal with it, but… You know, before we appeared here, Kyoko and I were on our way to our favorite cake shop." Her voice softens, and if she's smiling, Tsuna doesn't hear it. "We were giggling together, promising we'd tell no one else, because it wasn't our Appreciation Day. Later I had planned to go to the optician, because my dad broke his glasses again. And later that night we promised with my friend we'd do our homework together—" Her voice cracks in a sob. "We just want to go home," she says through her tears, and then she's sobbing in earnest. "This world is terrifying, and we just want to go home!"

Tsuna's heart clenches, hearing Haru cry so earnestly, Haru who's only ever joy and unwavering faith.

"I know that," Ryohei says, and he sounds like his anger's fading for the more vulnerable feelings underneath. "This is why, this is exactly why—"

"Onii-chan, stop!" Kyoko screams, so angry where Haru had been so sad, but sadness and hurt are unmistakable in her voice.

"Kyoko—"

"No, you listen to me! Tsuna-kun has nothing to do with this, why did you talk about it with him? Why did you make him feel like that?"

"I—"

"Look at him! Don't you care? Isn't he your friend? Your little brother too?"

Look at me, Tsuna's mind echoes fiercely, desperately, and he curls against Yamamoto tighter, over his siblings, his tears pouring down his cheeks all over again.

[Why is it it's only ever Tsuna no one cares about what they're doing to him?]

"Of course I do! Kyoko, you know I do."

Kyoko says nothing, and her silence hangs heavy in the air. When she speaks up again, her voice is quiet. "Onii-chan, do you think I love you any less than you love me?"

"Kyoko!" Ryohei shouts, panic in his voice, desperation. "Of course not!"

"Do you think I worry about you any less than you worry about me?"

"Kyoko, please."

"Do you think not knowing is any less terrifying than knowing? Isn't more terrifying than knowing?" She marks a pause, but Ryohei says nothing. "Do you think I don't want to keep you safe the way you want to keep me safe, that I don't want to know you safe, that I don't want to know when you aren't safe?"

"I'm the big brother. I need to keep you safe, Kyoko, it's my job."

"The Kyoko of this time, your Kyoko… Does it really mean so little to you—" her voice falters, choking on itself. It isn't any stronger when she tries again, is more strangled than before. "Does your Kyoko's fear really mean so little to you, you let her in the dark all these years? Letting her watch you go choking on the lump in her throat, not knowing where you're going, or how long you'll be gone, not knowing how dangerous it'll be, or if you'll ever come back?"

"Kyoko, please," Ryohei breathes out, quiet like Tsuna has never heard him.

"Onii-chan, please," Kyoko pleads too, as quiet as him, as sad as him, like her heart's bleeding out. "Tsuna-kun told me everything, it's true, but I'm only thankful to him he did. I've only always ever wanted to know, Onii-chan. I… I get to worry too, and be terrified for you too. I get to love you as extremely as you love me."

"Kyoko…" It's barely a whisper Tsuna almost doesn't catch, and it lingers in the air unanswered. "Sawada…"

Gokudera's voice strikes like a whip. "Get the fuck away from him."

"Hayato," Bianchi says, "don't—"

Quick, firm footsteps draw closer, walk past him, and then he hears the sound of clothes being roughly handled. "What gives you the fucking right, Lawn-head?" Gokudera spits out in a low voice. "Did the Tenth's father hold you at gunpoint when he gave you the ring? Did he fucking threaten you when you agreed to take it?"

"Octopus-head—"

"Don't you dare call me like that," Gokduero cuts him off like a knife. "I said, who gave you the fucking right? Do you hear us fucking bitch about the shithole you let this world become? Did the Tenth do anything but trying to wipe clean this fucking mess for you since he got sent here?"

"Hayato—" Ryohei tries again.

"Fuck you." A loud noise, wood creaking and cracking. Tsuna flinches, abruptly stopping crying, as his siblings startle quiet too while Yamamoto tenses. Haru stops crying too, a startled high-pitched noise escaping her mouth. "Fuck you, you hear me? Fuck you too, you bastard!" he shouts. "Don't think I'm not talking about you too! Fuck you, all of you! Go fuck yourselves!"

Tsuna curls protectively over his siblings as breaking noises fill the room, furniture breaking down and glass shattering, fabric being torn apart and wall being destroyed. He tears up all over again, but holds them back this time, sniffling, only a couple sobs escaping his mouth.

He eventually slowly pulls away from Yamamoto. His siblings hold onto his shirt like a lifeline, but he was never going to let go of them. He stands, lifting them against his chest, holding them firmly with both his arms. Yamamoto stands too, staying close, a comforting arm around his waist as he presses him against his side.

Tsuna's flames wash over room, damaging it but not hurting the people inside. The blue and red of Yamamoto's and Gokudera's flames blend in his orange, as well as the green and yellow of Lambo's and I-pin's, lighting intermittently in his arms.

Ryohei looks unwilling to meet his eye, but even less unwilling to look away, standing still as if on trial under Tsuna's gaze. Tsuna vindictively raises his tears-marred face, lets his gaze weigh down on him.

Is he looking at him now? He's just a kid too.

[They all are.]

Kyoko and Haru are on their knees near the open door, Fuuta and Bianchi respectively holding them in their arms. Their cheeks are wet and their faces red, but they're not crying anymore, flicking their eyes between Gokudera and him.

Hibari stands just outside the room, leaning against the wall, his arms crossed on his chest. Further down the hallway Lal leans on the opposite wall, Reborn sitting on her shoulder.

Tsuna keeps his eyes on Hibari until he looks back at him, wants him to see, then flicks his eyes to Reborn. Reborn doesn't look back, his fedora hiding his eyes, and Tsuna almost sneers, almost screams.

Look at me. You're robbing us of our childhood.

[Does he care?]

Gokudera's flames flare, the paintings left on the wall lighting up in red and blowing up, loudly crashing on the floor.

"Gokudera-kun," Tsuna calls out. Gokudera relentlessly kicks the desk, out of anything else to throw or break, slamming it against the wall and caving in the drawers. "Gokudera-kun…"

Gokudera kicks the desk one more time, then makes himself forcefully stand still, his hands curled into shaking fists, his back to Tsuna. His chest noticeably rises up and down, his hair in disarray, even more so after he runs his hands through them.

"Don't cry anymore," he says quietly, but it's loud in the silence of the room, if not for the occasional sniffles and choked back sobs. "You too, stupid cow, idiot girl, all of you… Stop crying."

"Lambo-san has never cried ever, Stupidera," Lambo snaps, or tries to, but it's halfhearted, weak and mumbled.

"Haru isn't stupid," Haru says, just as halfhearted as Lambo.

Gokudera snorts. "Good." He turns around, catches Tsuna's eye, then his face brightens, a genuine smile pulling at his lips. "We're all going to be fine, so you don't have to cry anymore, you don't have to worry about a thing." Tears well up in Tsuna's eyes again, his lips wobbling, but he blinks the tears away and swallows back his sob. Gokudera walks forwards, and stops in front of him. "Tsuna… -san."

Yamamoto giggles first, then Lambo and Haru, then Kyoko and I-Pin. Gokudera blushes to the tip of his ears, giving them a halfhearted withering glare.

Tsuna laughs too, grinning, warm spreading in his chest. "Hayato," he says, soft and grateful.

Gokudera blushes harder, but the softest smile briefly graces his lips. He holds out his hand, and Tsuna gives his easily, adjusting his siblings to carry them with one arm only.

Gokudera holds his hand in both of his. "We're all in this together, Tsuna-san. We're not just following your lead, we're standing right beside you, walking together on the same path, wherever it'll lead us. Do you hear me? It's important." Tsuna nods, a bit of shame and guilt clenching his heart, but overwhelmed with gratefulness beyond words most of all. Gokudera nods back, and gives his hand a squeeze. "You're not alone, have never been alone, and you'll never be alone. It's important."

Tsuna exhales shakily, then breathes in deeply. He nods again, wrapping his fingers around one of Gokudera's hand, and holds it tightly.

Yes, it's important, so important. It's what matters the most, and Tsuna can't let himself forgetting it again.

Gokudera reaches in his pocket, then puts something in his palm, curling Tsuna's fingers around it with both of his hands. The shape of a ring digs into his skin. He doesn't remember throwing it away.

Tsuna recoils at its touch, his hand tensing, and he harshly tugs on his hand to pull free.

"Tsuna-san." Gokudera holds on strong, but not unkindly. "Tsuna-san, please, listen to me, look at me. Look at me." Tsuna reluctantly gives in, looking up at Gokudera. "These rings, the power that come with them… We don't have to carry them with the weight and meaning people before us put in them. We can make them mean anything we want. The only thing we care about them meaning. With these rings…" He tightens his hold, looking down at their hands. He flicks his eyes back up, looks at his siblings, looks at him and Yamamoto, then sideways at Kyoko and Haru. Then he catches his eye again, and there's still that smile on his lips Tsuna believes in wholeheartedly, his eyes unyielding. "With these rings, we'll go back home, all of us, safe and sound. Be it by doing this raid or something else, it doesn't matter. We'll go back home, we'll be strong enough, I know we will. We will."

His words linger in the air, and Tsuna soaks in them, lets them dry the last of his tears. He looks at Yamamoto, and Yamamoto nods, gently taking his siblings from his arms with a smile.

Tsuna reaches his other hand to cradle one of Gokudera's. He lifts all four of their hands to his forehead, and closes his eyes. The ring's warm against his palm, but it doesn't matter now.

Tsuna calls his flames back to him, wraps them around his family, around Gokudera and Yamamoto, his siblings and Kyoko and Haru, around Fuuta and Bianchi.

His voice doesn't shake, doesn't doubt and doesn't fear. "We will."

He lowers their hands to his lips, and ever-so-slightly, but unmistakably loving, he washes his flames over the rest of his family too, Ryohei and Hibari, Reborn and Lal.

Because they're his family too, even in this world, even when they tear at each other.

Because he wants them to still be his family once they'd have hold on to each other through the storm, so they can find each other again.

A/N: You get a mental breakdown, and you get a mental breakdown, and you get a mental breakdown, everyone-

Except Yamamoto, ironically enough, who's the one who holds it together. But then again it's not so surprising, because he's the one the whole "saving the future" is really personal and means everything to him. So I believe that after his off-screen talk with Reborn in canon, where he got to let it all out about how badly the future was actually getting to him, he made sure to find a strong, steady mental headspace to be in to carry him forwards.

And yeah, Gokudera got to do that, but you know, I actually think he's more fragile mentally-wise than Yamamoto, so he still needed that breakdown. Let alone Tsuna, and everyone else. This was really rough, but I think they really needed to let themselves feel and give in to that terrible future, so they can better fight against it going forwards.

As for Ryohei, hopefully you're not thinking too bad of him, because I do think he had a point, even if he went terribly about it. Or at the very least, he only meant well, but let his feelings get the best of him, because he too was terrified in this chapter, even if not for the same reasons as the others. And you know, I actually sat myself and wondered if in this verse Ryohei would have told the truth to Kyoko at some point ten years in the future, but then decided he wouldn't have. Because I do think he grew up too, even in regard to his overprotectiveness of Kyoko. But becoming part of the mafia fully really made him realize the weight he'd put on Kyoko's shoulders if he were to let her know, and he wanted to spare her from it if he could, and was always going to make sure he could.

Evidently Kyoko had plenty to say that, and thought plenty of that in case of TYL Kyoko, but I hope it came across how he wasn't in the wrong per se. How neither of them are, really, though Kyoko is absolutely in her right to claim that decision for her to make, and her only. I'd love to hear your thoughts about how I managed that dynamic, actually! And your overall thoughts about the chapter, because it's one of my favorites of this story haha.

I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Any and all review are appreciated.

Thank you for reading!

- Hope

Answers to Guests' Comments:

Mori: ahhhh thank you for saying that! ! exploring the sasagawas dynamic was really at the core of this chapter, just as much as showing the toll the future was taking on tsuna. and YES, glad you're able to see where ryohei is coming from here! ! it's just like you said, they ARE in a war so it's not like his fears aren't legitimate and understandable, but it's just unfortunate it makes him a bit cruel to tsuna without him realizing or meaning to be. thank you for your comment!