Keep Me Where the Light Is (part 6)
Poor old Granddad,
I laughed at all his words.
I thought he was a bitter man,
He spoke of woman's ways…
They'll trap you then they use you,
Before you even know.
For love is blind and you're far too kind,
Don't ever let it show…
I wish that I knew what I know now
When I was younger.
I wish that I knew what I know now
When I was stronger…
The can can's such a pretty show,
They'll steal your heart away,
But backstage, back on earth again,
The dressing rooms are gray…
They come on strong, and it ain't too long
Before they make you feel a man.
But love is blind and you soon will find
You're just a boy again…
…You'll have to learn, just like me,
And that's the hardest way,
Ooh la la
I wish that I knew what I know now
When I was younger.
I wish that I knew what I know now
When I was stronger.
(Ooh La La ~ The Faces)
Friday, July 22, 2022
9:07 AM
Quinn Fabray opened her eyes with a jolt Friday morning. It took her sleep-deprived brain several seconds to catch up as she lay motionless on her stomach in bed. As those seconds crept by, the blond drama professor felt her head pounding. It was the kind of pounding that reverberated like a pinball from her forehead to the top of her head then back down from one temple to the other before slamming against the back of her skull, leaving her teeth aching.
She moaned slightly as she closed her eyes again then slowly reopened them, hoping for a different outcome. The result was the same, only the pounding was harder as she shifted her green eyes to look across the bed, trying to remember the night's events.
Quinn's thoughts were fuzzy just like the foul taste in her mouth. She swallowed hard in an effort to force moisture but that worked about as well as someone in Hell requesting ice water.
The blonde remembered celebrating with Brittany and Santana…briefly. She also remembered Rachel never showed, eventually texting that she got caught having to talk with the press and the show's investors and other industry bigwigs.
After a few strong margaritas, the rest of the night was a blur.
"Good morning," a friendly voice said from somewhere inside the room.
That startled her, causing her to move before her stiff joints and muscles were ready as she tried sitting upright in the bed. When she did, she realized she was totally naked.
"Aahh," she screeched, reaching for the cream-colored sheet, her head pounding even harder and making her dizzy.
Quinn pulled the sheet up around her bare chest and turned her head to the right, finding her past standing there freshly showered and in a towel with a big dopey grin.
"Oh god," the blonde said, a look of horror on her pretty face.
"I was going to surprise you and go get coffee and bagels."
She continued to stare, pulling the sheet up to her neck and looking around the familiar room to realize she was back inside her hotel. She finally asked, "Why are you here?"
"What?" Puck asked, somewhat confused, running a hand through his wet hair and moving toward the bed, "You didn't think I'd just sneak out on you this morning, did you? I'm classier than that."
Quinn looked down at herself then back up at Puck. "Did we…?"
The tall brunette sat on the edge of the bed and smiled as he leaned to kiss Quinn, "You look beautiful in the sunlight."
She cut him off abruptly by covering her mouth with her free hand, "What are you doing?"
"What's your problem?" he asked, taken aback by the harsh reception.
"You need to leave," Quinn stated firmly, "Now."
"Why?" Puck's face showed a look of hurt.
"Because I'm gay, Puck…," the blonde shook her head, rattled by the haze of memory filtering back into her head, emphasizing, "…this should nothave happened."
"Well, you certainly didn't seem 'gay' last night," he accused, standing up and moving to a side chair where his jeans were draped.
"No…I was drunk last night…and lonely…and just plain stupid," Quinn rambled, "but I was…and am…still very much gay."
Puck pulled on his boxer briefs and faded black jeans, shaking his head and staring over at Quinn but not saying any of the dozens of things running through his mind. He pulled his red t-shirt over his head and bent over to grab his socks and black boots, finally responding simply, "Fine."
It wasn't Quinn's intention to hurt him, but she felt the truth needed to be made clear so there was no further ambiguity. "Puck…last night should have ended with old friends sharing drinks and laughs," she tried to soften the message, "I take full responsibility…I'm really sorry."
"Fine," he repeated abrasively, walking toward the door, shoes in hand.
"Puck…," Quinn pulled up to her knees, still gripping the sheet tightly.
"I'm sorry I ever saw you again, Quinn Fabray…," Puck stated bitterly as he yanked open the room's door, running face first into Santana who held a drink caddy with two cups of coffee with one hand and with her other hand raised to knock.
"Sorry," he said, brushing past her as she stood there in shock.
"Puck?" the Latina recognized him instantly, having dated him herself in high school.
The angry rocker kept walking toward a set of elevators, saying over his shoulder, "Not now, Lopez."
Noah Puckerman got into the elevator which opened straightaway, never turning around as the doors closed behind him.
Santana shook her head in disbelief, her eyes as wide as saucers, then she knocked firmly on the partially-opened door, announcing her arrival, "Quinn? It's me."
The dark-haired beauty did not wait for the okay to enter, pushing on the barrier then closing it behind her. She found her best friend still sitting in the middle of the king-sized bed, cloaked in its bed sheets.
Santana grimaced as she stood there silently staring at Quinn who looked as disheveled and demoralized as the brunette had ever seen her.
She shook her head and moved to the edge of the mattress, "Do not say a word."
Santana frowned and shrugged. "Did I?"
"Just please don't," she told her old friend, bunching up the long sheet around her torso as she pushed past her toward the bathroom, "I do not need a lecture."
Santana turned to set the cups of coffee on a nearby round table, saying, "Me lecture? Never."
She busied herself with putting sweetener and cream into one of the cups, hearing Quinn moving around inside the bathroom.
A couple of minutes later, Quinn stepped out in one of the hotel's white bathrobes, and asked, "Ok, aren't you going to say anything at all?"
"You told me not to…," Santana took a bite of her bagel with cream cheese, sitting in one of the chairs and crossing her legs at the knees.
"I ran into him last night."
"Uhuh," she said as she chewed.
"He's in the band that played last night at Caliente."
Santana nodded, taking another bite, "Ok."
"We had too much to drink," Quinn admitted, "Things went way off track."
"Clearly," Santana said with a raised eyebrow.
"You can drop the judgement," Quinn warned, pulling the lid off the other coffee cup and taking a big gulp, "Ugh…this is horrible coffee."
"Mine is good…and there is no judgement, Q…," Santana commented, taking another sip, adding, "…but, he's still in love with you. I saw it in his face."
"He needs to get over it," the blonde dismissed, "This tastes like decaf."
"Oh hell…they mismarked them then. Here, this one must be regular. I should've known it tasted too good to be decaf," Santana pushed the other cup toward Quinn, "Sorry about the cream."
Quinn looked down at the cup in her hand, her upper lip curling in disgust, then she handed it to Santana, asking passively, "Why are you drinking decaf recently? The only people who drink decaf are old people and pregnant women."
Santana looked up at her friend, their eyes locking.
"No way! You are?" Quinn surmised correctly, a smile filling her face when she realized Santana was not denying the statement, "You are!"
"Seven weeks," Santana smiled too.
"Congratulations!" Quinn squealed with delight, bending to hug Santana tightly, "I'm so happy for you guys."
"Thank you," the Latina accepted the embrace, "Please don't tell anyone yet, ok?"
"Of course not," Quinn assured her, holding on to the brunette's hand, "This is such a surprise, San!"
Santana smirked as she retorted, "Well, not nearlyas big a surprise as you this morning."
Monday, July 31, 2022
12:28 PM
Rachel Berry stopped walking, pausing near an oversized, cement shrub planter that was affixed in front of Kabuki in Midtown Manhattan, pulling out her purse mirror and quickly checking her hair for perfection and her white teeth for red lipstick. She stuffed the mirror back inside her fashionable handbag and flattened out the black skirt of her lightweight dress before stepping to the restaurant's front door and pulling it opened.
As soon as she stepped into the foyer of the popular Japanese restaurant, she spotted a handsome blond guy waiting patiently on an ornate bench made of dark, polished wood.
"I am so sorry I'm late," Rachel apologized genuinely as she walked up to him.
"It's ok," Grayson Knox said as he stood, his six foot height towering over the petite brunette, "I guess I should just be honored that you showed up this time."
Rachel took in a deep breath, knowing she fully deserved that zing after never showing to the Caliente celebration on premiere night and cancelling their last two attempts at a lunch date.
"I had a morning meeting that ran longer than I expected, but thank you for waiting," she emphasized the second part of her statement.
Grayson gave her a tight-lipped smile, easing the tension slightly, then told her, "Let's get a table."
The two of them were seated quickly inside the busy dining area which was packed full of men and women in business suits and high-powered work attire. They ordered just as quickly from the sushi bar when their efficient waitress arrived at their table, bringing glasses of water and a fresh pot of green tea.
Grayson removed the lid of the ornamental Japanese teapot, checking that the tea had fully brewed, before asking Rachel, "Tea?"
"Yes, please," she responded, pushing her small cup closer toward him.
He poured some of the green-tinted liquid into her cup then into his own, setting the pot back down on the side of their table.
Rachel squeezed a wedge of lemon into hers then blew on it to dissipate some of its steam before lifting it to her mouth and taking a sip. "I love hot tea," she informed, "It's so good for the throat."
Grayson nodded then took a sip of his.
"I drink some in my dressing room before each performance," she detailed.
"Interesting," the blond forced a smile.
"So the reviews all say we're a hit!" the Broadway starlet stated excitedly.
"I've read," Grayson acknowledged, taking another sip of his tea.
Rachel nervously shifted in her chair, observing, "You don't have much to say."
"Why did you ask me to lunch today, Rachel?" Grayson said candidly.
She tucked her hair behind her ears, stammering, "I…I…just wanted to see you again."
"You haven't made much of an effort to see me before today," he spoke honestly.
"I apologize," she frowned, unsure of what more to say, realizing how her actions could appear thoughtless.
"I'm to the point now that I don't know whether you want me to call you or not, because I don't know if you are actually interested or if you are politely waiting for me to get the hint."
She looked down at the table, not knowing how to process Grayson's bluntness or how to mix that with the way she felt about seeing him again today. She looked up into his deep blue eyes, noting that there was a trace of pain and mystery behind them, then she realized she felt the same butterflies in her stomach as she did the first time she met him.
The waitress appeared suddenly and set their sushi platters in front of them then left without saying a word.
Grayson sighed, lining up his chopsticks on the table so they were perfectly even, looking back up at Rachel, "I'm sorry…."
"I'm sorry…," she said at the same time he did, causing them both to laugh.
"This is probably why I don't date much," the handsome blond admitted.
"No really, Grayson…I'm very sorry."
Grayson could see the sincerity along with all the intensity that was ever-present in Rachel Berry's big, brown eyes.
"It's okay…want to start with a clean slate?" he offered, passing the soy sauce to her.
"Very much so," Rachel answered, her face showing relief as she poured some of the black liquid into a tiny bowl that sat near her plate.
They each used their wooden chopsticks to pick up a segment of their sushi rolls, dipping first into the soy sauce then putting it into their mouths.
Rachel finished chewing then took a sip of her water before saying, "I know this is no excuse for my behavior but…I've just sort of fallen into some bad habits, because I've become accustomed to dating a certain type of guy."
"You mean…theatre people?" he asked, trying to decipher.
"No…," she clarified, "…Jerks."
Grayson's eyes narrowed as he pondered that statement.
"I like that you're different," Rachel expanded for clarity.
Grayson smiled and looked down, "I'll take that as a compliment then."
Rachel laughed, "You should…definitely." She paused then added, "I loved my roses, by the way. It was a special surprise."
"Oh good," Grayson replied, feeling reassured that his gesture was appropriate, "I wanted them to be special…and worthy of a true star."
Rachel beamed at that sentiment, revealing coyly, "They're the only bouquet I took home with me that night."
Grayson looked up from his plate. As his eyes scanned Rachel's face, he felt his heart flutter. He took a calming breath and smiled back at her.
Saturday, August 6, 2022
1:36PM
Brittany was in the girls' dressing room Saturday, putting on her stage make-up for the matinee performance, when she heard Eva Navarro shout, "Austin! You can't be in here…we're changing clothes!"
"Oh please, honey…there's nothing in here that interests me," Austin Royle retorted as he passed through the group of female dancers without even a side-glance, walking up to Brittany and sitting in the empty chair next to her station, "Oh my god, Britt…we went out again last night."
"Who?" Brittany asked in confusion.
"Prince Charming," Austin reminded her, his excitement overflowing, "…from the dance floor?"
"Ohhh…Lover Boy?" she giggled, never one to take Austin's fleeting romances seriously.
"Yes! It's now officially official…I am in love, Britt," Austin practically melted into his best friend.
"Ok, so tell me about him," Brittany could sense a difference in Austin this time around.
"He's perfectly wonderful…tall, handsome…muscles like you would not believe," Austin detailed with descriptive hand gestures, "He's sort of quiet and mysterious which intrigues me, you know."
"So he let you do all the talking?" Brittany affectionately jabbed at her old friend.
"Exactly! You know I love that," he replied in turn, "More than that though, he was a real gentleman…very polite. He held the door for me. He paid for dinner…at a very nice restaurant, I might add."
"Oh, he has a job then?" Brittany interjected.
"Yes, he has a job," Austin balked, "An actual, professional job at that…something involving sports…or advertising…or something boring like that."
Brittany smiled, stating, "That's better than most of the guys you date."
"Ok, true," he smirked, adding, "Oh and get this…he loves musical theatre. He named off a whole list of shows he's seen since living in Manhattan."
"That's great…get him to come to the show."
"I maybe didn't mention the show to him yet," Austin bit his bottom lip.
"Why not?" Brittany grimaced slightly.
Austin shrugged, "I just was enjoying talking to him. I felt like an adult for the first time last night…like maybe this could actually lead somewhere. I didn't want him to think I was just some chorus dancer looking for another fuck."
"I guess I can understand that. I know it's sort of different for gay guys than it is for us girls," Brittany put a supportive hand on Austin's forearm, "Look, if you're happy then I'm happy."
He smiled and put his hand over hers, "I know it's just been two dates…but I'm happy."
"Then when do I get to meet him? Cause you know I still have to give my approval before you plan the wedding," Brittany winked.
"Soon, I hope…a double date perhaps?" he suggested.
"Austin Royle! Out!" Dominic Serra yelled from the doorway of the dressing room, "Now!"
"Shit! Gotta go," he stood quickly to leave, saying back over his shoulder, "I'll ask him about us all getting together next weekend!"
Friday, August 12, 2022
10:14 AM
"Santana Lopez-Pierce," a stocky nurse called out.
Santana looked to her left and saw Brittany smile at her then they both stood and walked toward the nurse. The couple followed her until she stopped at a cut out in the wall where there was a small room.
"Step up here and let's get your weight," the straightforward nurse pointed to a scale.
Santana handed Brittany her bag then stepped onto the electronically-calculated scale, grimacing when she saw that she had actually lost weight since she was weighed two weeks earlier at her final appointment with Dr. Le.
The nurse wrote it down in the chart in her hand then motioned to a nearby chair, "Sit so we can check your blood pressure."
Santana sat down as the nurse fitted her with the black cuff that automatically inflated. Once it beeped that it was finished, the nurse wrote down that number as well as her temperature before removing the cuff.
"Follow me," she told them, leading them into an empty exam room and saying, "Disrobe and put this on please. The doctor will be in shortly."
Once the nurse closed the door, Santana picked up the paper gown off the exam table and quipped to her wife, "I have stripped down for doctors more in the last few months than I have for you."
Brittany chuckled, responding, "Hey, at least I get to watch this time."
Santana gave her a look as she stepped out of her shorts and handed them to the blonde. "There is nothing sexy about an exam room."
"Oh, I don't know…I've always liked when we've played naughty nurse and patient," Brittany winked knowingly.
Santana put on the gown as instructed and handed the rest of her garments to her wife, a sultry smirk crossing her lips as she leaned over and said in a low voice, "Well, maybe then we need to schedule an appointment…soon."
There was a sudden knock that startled the girls, causing them to giggle as the door opened and a tall, brunette woman walked into the room in light blue scrubs with a brown file folder in her hand, "Santana?"
"Uh yes," the Latina stood upright quickly, "Hi."
"Hi," the doctor replied with a friendly smile, "I'm Samantha Yates."
"This is my wife, Brittany," Santana introduced.
"Hi, Brittany," Dr. Yates greeted then said, "Santana, why don't you hop up here and let's chat first."
Santana climbed up on the elevated exam table while Dr. Yates sat on her shorter rolling stool, crossing her left leg over her other so she could prop Santana's medical chart in front of her.
"How have you been feeling so far?" the doctor asked as she scanned down the sheet in front of her.
"Pretty good, I guess," she answered with a slight shrug.
"I see this is your first pregnancy," Dr. Yates commented, "Any morning sickness yet?"
"More like all day sickness," Santana retorted, looking over at Brittany who gave her a sympathetic frown.
The doctor laughed, "Yes, well that is to be expected in the first trimester. I see here that your weight went down since your last appointment with Dr. Le." Dr. Yates looked up from the chart, "We need to get you to eat more."
"Nothing smells or tastes good," Santana stated, "Even things I used to love."
"Strange things happen during pregnancy…smells become intensified…taste buds alter…cravings set in," Dr. Yates described, "Did Dr. Le's office give you a list of foods to avoid while you're pregnant?"
"Yes, I've cut out alcohol, caffeine, fish, deli meat…salad bars," she listed, "Those things pretty much made up my entire diet before I was pregnant."
"Well, just find something that stays down and eat more of it, okay?" the doctor patted Santana's knee, turning to Brittany with a smile, "Your job is to make sure she eats and starts gaining weight."
"I will," Brittany vowed, knowing she'd been trying.
"It's very important for development of the fetus," the doctor turned back toward Santana, "You've been taking your pre-natal vitamins, correct?"
"Definitely," Santana answered, "I've still just been so tired lately. It's like I can't get enough rest even though I sleep all the time."
"After we're done here, I'm going to send you over to have some blood drawn," Dr. Yates instructed, "It sounds like you might be anemic. If you test positive then we can add an additional iron supplement to help you feel better."
Santana nodded as the doctor scanned the remaining pages in her chart.
"When I reviewed your records that Dr. Le's office sent over, I saw that you had several unsuccessful cycles before this last one…due to a damaged fallopian tube…," the doctor flipped back a page in her notes to continue her statement, "…stemming from an infection you had when you were younger?"
Santana looked over at Brittany who smiled encouragingly, telling her doctor, "That's correct…I have some vaginal scar tissue too from the same incident."
"Incident?" Dr. Yates probed.
The Latina looked down at her hands which were folded in her lap before looking back over at Brittany.
The doctor observed the anxiety that passed between the couple, saying gently, "Santana?"
The attractive brunette swallowed then revealed to her doctor, "I was raped when I was seventeen. I was in the hospital for a week afterwards because of how severe the infection was from the tearing."
Dr. Yates gave her a sympathetic look, saying, "I'm sorry that happened to you."
"That's not going to cause a problem with her giving birth, is it?" Brittany asked with concern.
"We'll definitely check everything thoroughly and make an informed decision about whether to proceed with a vaginal birth or schedule a C-section," Dr. Yates answered the worried blonde, "Don't worry though…I assure you we will err on the side of caution, Brittany. We won't do anything that will put your wife or your child at risk, ok?"
Brittany nodded and sighed heavily.
"Now, let's regroup and focus on the positive," the doctor said with an upbeat tone, "Santana, lay back, and we'll do the part that's always fun for parents."
The doctor turned toward the counter and pulled out a hand-held machine from the drawer. Once Santana was flat, Dr. Yates moved a portion of the Latina's gown and told her, "This will feel a bit cold and gooey."
She squirted some blue gel onto the lower portion of Santana's abdomen then placed the wand that was attached to the machine in the same location, moving it around until there was a distinct thumping sound.
Brittany stood up and moved to the other side of the exam table, grabbing Santana's hand and smiling uncontrollably. The couple had heard the heartbeat of their child growing inside Santana a couple of times already, but each time it just seemed to get stronger and louder and made the entire experience that much more real for them.
"That's still amazing," Brittany said with awe, leaning down to kiss her wife.
Dr. Yates smiled at the couple, telling them, "This is always cool too…listen." She moved the wand up a little on Santana's torso until there was the sound of two heartbeats overlapping, identifying for them, "Yours with your baby's…beating together."
Santana's breath caught in her chest, and she felt tears filling her eyes as she listened. This was all she'd ever wanted…to be married to the woman she'd loved for a lifetime and to carry their child. This moment meant everything to her.
The brunette looked up into Brittany's blue eyes and saw the same emotion there. She felt a tear escape and roll down her face as she smiled at the blonde.
Brittany squeezed Santana's hand tightly, pulling it up to her lips and kissing it, reminding her, "I love you so much, honey."
Author's Note: Thanks for continuing to read this story. If you enjoyed this chapter, please review and tell me. If you have questions or need clarity, feel free to ask those things too!