Right so thanks for all the awesome reviews and a special thanks to Pishta Hamster whose advice should mean that this chapter is a little more realistic than the last in terms of geography and language! :D This is the last Stag do chapter so enjoy it, the next chapter is kinda cool though, it does a backwards time jump which to do with the end of this chapter so see if you can work out what that might be. Anyway enjoy! xxx p.s feel free to traslate the German, its actually quite funny. just type it into google and it should work!
"Sie sind es sind gebrochen nicht glücklich,"
Pete stared up at the middle aged nurse with a raised eyebrow as she clumsily dabbed at the tiny cut on the bridge of his nose.
"Uh…sorry?" he frowned.
"Es ist eine gute Sache, die Sie heiß sind," she laughed. "Etwas erklärt mir, daß die Mädchen nicht für Sie wegen Ihrer Gehirne gehen."
"Right," Pete nodded slowly as she pulled away from him and tossed the bloodied gauze into the bin at the end of the bed, peeling off her gloves and staring at him expecetantly.
"Nicht erhalte ich danken Sie mindestens?" she smirked.
"Danken!" Pete shouted with a laugh. "I know that, its thank you, yeah?"
"Aber leider wir sind alle aus Goldsternen heraus gut gemacht," she laughed and then placed a hand on his shoulder. "It would be best if you don't wash this," she pointed to the cut on his nose. "Ok?"
"You speak English?" Pete frowned.
"More than you speak German apparently," she smiled. "Try not to get hit again,"
"Yeah," he grinned boyishly at her, jumping down off of the bed and nodding his thanks. "Uh…danke…"
"Und wir haben einen Sieger!" The nurse clapped. "Und Dr. denken Jansen erklärte mir, daß alles Brits Idioten sind,"
"Yeah, you too," Pete smiled, giving her a small wave and pushing the curtain aside, stepping out into the hallway. Catching his reflection in one of the mirrors on the wall, he blinked in surprise seeing that he didn't even have a bruise. Thank God for that, because he was almost certain that if the bloke in the bar hadn't succeeded in breaking his nose, Allie sure as shit would have when he walked in the door.
"Ay, ay," Dave nodded to him from where he and the rest of the boys were sat nursing their own wounds at the end of the hall. "How's the nose?"
"Uh, I don't actually know," Pete leant forward and lowered his voice. "Mate, I ain't got a fucking clue what 'alf these people are sayin'. That nurse in there could 'ave just told me I've got three hours to live for all I know,"
Dave laughed and clapped him on the shoulder, shooting a glance at the clock and shaking his head.
"Fucking 'ell, it's already 10 in the morning,"
"Ah, well I don't know about you ladies," Benjamin piped up, picking at the cut on his lip. "But I could do with a full English and a beer,"
"Finally," Steve smirked. "A Scotsman who makes sense,"
"Oi," Pete nodded towards Benjamin who looked a little worse than the rest of them. "What 'appened to you? You didn't get too badly hurt, did ya?"
"Nah," Benjamin smirked. "I caused more damage than I endured,"
"Bollocks," Swill laughed. "You went to twat some bloke, got your foot caught on a chair and knocked yourself out on the table,"
"Oi!" Benjamin snapped, pointing at him. "In case you've forgotten, the reason he then got knocked out was because he tripped over my arm after Steve punched him so I played my part, alright?"
They walked down the bright yellow hallway, chatting amongst themselves about the outcome of last night and comparing war wounds.
Pushing through the glass doors which led to the outside world, Pete frowned, suddenly realising that he had no recollection whatsoever of getting here last night.
"Uh," Matt laughed, glancing up and down the long road. "Do you guys know the way back to the hotel?"
"Nah, I just thought I'd follow you lot," Swill shrugged, pulling his cigarettes out of his pocket and lighting one.
"Right so, what you boys are saying is that we're stranded somewhere in Prague with no idea of how to get back to a hotel which we don't know the name of?" Steve looked around at the younger men as they nodded and dropped his head into his hands.
"Charles Bridge," Pete shouted, snatching the patch of matches out of Swill's hand. "We're staying at the Charles Bridge hotel."
"Look, the underground is over there," Ned pointed, jogging across the road and gesturing the them to follow him.
"Metro," Pete frowned. "What the fuck is Metro?"
"Its what they call the underground, innit?" Swill shrugged. "'Ere Steve, you've been abroad and shit, you should know how to use this,"
"I 'aven't been to Prague before," Steve laughed. "How am I supposed to…"
"Fuck it," Bovver snorted. "We'll work it out somehow, I mean how hard can it be?"
"Danke für das Verwenden des Metrosystems, Sie sind jetzt in Troja."
"Where the fuck are we now?" Pete stepped off of the crowded train and looked around.
"I dunno," Benjamin came to a stop next to him, peering over Swill's shoulder at the map. "I think they just said we were somewhere called Troja or something,"
"Troja?" Swill nodded. "Oi, there's a zoo near 'ere, d'you wanna go?"
The boys turned and stared at him in horror.
"No mate," Dave frowned. "Given we're hung over to shit and we still 'aven't 'ad any food, I don't think any of us are in the mood to go to the fucking zoo."
"Alright, it was just a thought you miserable twat," he shot back, crumpling the map and shoving it back into his pocket.
"Someone 'ere must speak fucking English," Bovver muttered, looking around at the people hurrying about the platform.
"Matt, you're American, yeah?" Ned stared at the blue eyed man intently.
"Yeah," Matt laughed. "And?"
"Well, don't that make you bilingual?" he shrugged.
"Oh fucking 'ell, Ned," Pete laughed. "Just don't think any more, yeah? It must hurt like fuck,"
"What?" the shorter man frowned. "He's foreign, he should know this kinda shit,"
"Gimme that map," Steve held his hand out to Swill who yanked the scrunched up paper out his pocket and threw it at him, watching the older mans brow furrow in concentration as he tried to make sense of it.
"You're 'aving a laugh," Steve snorted.
"What?" Bovver jerked his head towards him, searching for the exit. Damn it, he was desperate for a cigarette.
"We're about a ten minute walk from the city centre, you daft prick," he laughed. "Which means we're about fifteen minutes from our hotel."
"Oh," Swill frowned. "We'll who put me in charge of the fucking map?" he shoved Matt who was still laughing at him. "In case none of you cunts noticed, I took a bottle to the 'ead last night so I ain't exactly thinking straight,"
"Christ almighty," Keith rolled his eyes. "You going through PMS or what?"
"Look, at least we know where we are, yeah?" Dave rubbed the back of his neck tiredly. "So I'm thinking hotel, piss, food and beer preferably in that order."
"Yeah, I'm well up for that," Pete nodded, staring towards the stairs. "Hurry up though, yeah? I don't know about you lads, but I've gotta piss like a racehorse,"
Climbing the small set of metal stairs, the sunlight hit their eyes for the first time in about 20 minutes and they all groaned.
"Oi, look, there's a café across the road," Swill pointed out excitedly.
"I know mate, but hotel first, yeah?" Pete squinted in the bright afternoon, wishing he had thought to bring his sunglasses with him. "I don't really fancy walking into a café like this,"
He gestured down to his shirt which was still covered in specks of blood and grimaced; no wonder they'd gotten so many looks on the underground.
"Fair play, brother," Benjamin pulled off his sweater, grinning smugly at the clean t-shirt which he wore underneath. "Some of us came a little more prepared though,"
"Oh, fuck off, you geek," Pete laughed, slugging his arm around the Scotsman shoulders as they walked towards the bridge, the sun beating down on their heads and bringing out the dreaded hangover headaches.
"I'm the geek?" Benjamin scoffed. "You're voluntarily signing yourself up for sex with only one woman for the rest of your life and you think I'm the geek?"
"You have seen Allie, 'aven't you?" Pete smirked.
"The fact that she's fit doesn't matter," he replied, shaking his head earnestly. "Although, I have to admit, if you weren't in there, I would be,"
"Fuck off," Pete snorted.
"No, I'm telling you brother," he sighed. "I've seen the way she looks at me,"
"What's all this?" Dave piped up.
"Ah, see pretty boy 'ere reckons Allie would go for him, if I wasn't in the picture," Pete shrugged.
"I didn't say you had to be out of the picture," Benjamin laughed. "I could have her in a second if I wanted," he winked at him. "You're just lucky I took a liking to you and thought better than to charm her off you,"
"Bollocks," Dave laughed. "Are you forgetting how you got shot down the other night by that barmaid?"
"She didn't shoot me down," the Scotsman shot back. "She obviously just realised how drunk I was and didn't want to take advantage,"
"Yeah, yeah," Swill snorted. "That must 'ave been it,"
"Hey, Pete have you got the key to our room?" Matt frowned, digging around in his pockets. "I can't find it,"
"Uh, I dunno," Pete pursed his lips, flipping his wallet open and trying not to pass out when he realised that the wad of notes he had had in there last night had been reduced to a few stray coins. How much had they drunk exactly? Tipping it upside down, he tapped it against his hand hoping that the small card would fall out. The last thing he wanted on top of everything was to get back to the hotel and have to explain to them that they'd lost their keys.
A few stray recipts fluttered down to the pavement but he ignored them, letting Benjamin bend down to inspect them.
"Ay," he frowned, standing up again and waving a bright orange piece of paper in front of Pete's face. "What's this?"
"What?" he frowned, still desperately trying to get the hotel key out of his wallet.
Benjamin unfolded the post it note and stared down at it, a faint smile tugging at his lips.
"Pete," he read aloud. "For proving me wrong, I.O.U., Allie xxx." Staring at Pete in confusion, he saw the grin spread across his mate's face. "What's all that about?"
"You really wanna know when I became a doomed man?" he winked. "Look at the back,"
"December 14th, 2002," Benjamin shook his head. "I don't get it,"
"Oi," Bovver piped up. "That's my birthday, innit?"
"Yeah," Pete nodded, finally retrieving the room key and tossing it to Matt who just about caught it. "You lot remember that night?"
The boys frowned, staring off into space.
"I remember puking a fair amount," Ike offered.
"'Ere, didn't your bird drag us to some shitty club?" Swill glared at Bovver.
"You had a girlfriend?" Matt grinned, staring at his roommate.
"Oh fuck off," Bovver snapped. "We're not all gay boys like you, y'know, and besides, she wasn't my girlfriend, she was just some bird…"
"So what's any of that got to do with Allie?" Benjamin tapped Pete on the shoulder again with a cheeky smirk on his face. "What exactly did she owe you?"
"Ah, boys now see that'd be telling, wouldn't it?" he raised an eyebrow, snatching the note back and smiling to himself.
"Come off it, you cheeky fuck," Swill laughed. "You talking like the fuckin' Riddler ain't gonna make us any less interested…"
Smirking over his shoulder at them, Pete shook his head and went back to staring down at the note, tracing his fingers over the three kisses scrawled at the end of it. He should have run right then and there, he should have known just from looking at her that he was fucked for life, that this one girl had the ability to pick his life up and turn it onto its arse. But he didn't. He stayed.
His grin widened when he thought back to the night that had led to his note as he shoved it back into his pocket, deciding that sticking around was probably the best decision he ever made.
"'Ere look," Swill cried. "They got penguins in that zoo," he shook his head. "I fucking love penguins,"
"Mate, did they give you drugs in that hospital?" Keith frowned.
"What?" Swill shrugged. "Why's everyone lookin' at me like that? I think the zoo would be a right bubble, especially if we get pissed before hand,"
"Right, I tell you what," Steve grinned. "How's about, we all go to the pub and you can to the zoo on your todd and then give us a call when you're done, yeah?"
"Fuck off, I ain't going on my own," he frowned. "I'll probably get arrested or something,"
"For what?" Matt laughed.
"Aw, mate, that there's a question you don't wanna be asking," Pete smirked.
"Ich möchte etwas Bier," Ike grinned down at his phone as the others stopped to look at him.
"Mate, are you fucking jokin me?" Pete laughed. "You speak German and you 'aven't thought to break it out until now?"
"Nah, nah," he shook his head. "I got the internet on my phone and I'm on some translator website,"
"What'd the fuck you just say?" Bovver frowned.
"I would like some beer," Ike told them, chuckling. "Aw, mate, this things is fucking genius," he started tapping something else in. "Oi, did you know that cock in German is Hahn? Cock sounds way better,"
"Yeah, well it would have been a lot more genius if you'd found it an 'alf hour ago when we was stranded on the fucking underground." Steve laughed. "Jesus Christ, are we almost there? I ain't got the energy for this anymore?"
"Yeah, look," Matt pointed to the large building just over the street. "That's us right there,"
"Thank fuck," he muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets and narrowly avoiding tripping over the curb.
"Dear me, ladies," a voice stopped them, a grin spreading across Pete's face as he closed his eyes and laughed. He'd know that poncy Hugh Grant accent anywhere.
"Don't you look worse for wear?" Harry Harding grinned at them as he leant against the bridge wall, the tinted sunglasses he was wearing hiding his smiling eyes. "Good thing I got out here just in the nick of time, eh?"
"Ay, ay," Pete laughed, jogging over to him and pulling him into a hug. "I thought you couldn't make it, you cheeky twat?"
"Ah, see so did I," he smirked. "But then I came down with a sudden case of the flu and figured the best way to cure it would be to fly over here on the company account and get pissed."
"Its worked out well for me so far," Dave held his hand up and grinned.
"So, why don't you girls go back to the hotel and make yourselves look pretty?" Harry winked at Pete. "Its your last night out here so I figured we better make it a good one,"
He held up the tickets and watched Pete's eyes glow as he laughed.
"Oh no you fucking 'aven't." he shook his head, taking one of the tickets out of his hand and looking at it.
"Oh yes, I fucking did," Harry nodded, handing out the tickets to the rest of the lads.
"Aw, sweet," Bovver laughed. "V.I.P. entry? How'd you get your hands on these?"
"Mate, say the words 'stag do' in any bar out here and they treat you like royalty," he snorted. "They know that the likes of us are interested in one thing and one thing only: spending every cent we have on alcohol,"
"Well fuck me sideways," Swill exclaimed, raising an eyebrow and showing his ticket to Dave. "The word topless is the same as it is in English,"
"I know you're marrying my baby sister and you're happy blah, blah, blah," Harry waved his hand dismissvely. "But this is your last technical night of freedom, Dunham. No one to explain yourself to, no one to yell at you when you vomit in the bed later tonight," he smirked. "What'd you say we make the best of it, eh?"
"You know what, Sloaner?" Pete winked. "I say bring it the fuck on."
So in case you hadn't guessed it, the next chapter will be a little glimpse into the story behind the note Pete carries in his wallet...then after that one...prepare for the ultimate seven month time jump and get ready to say hello to another Dunham... :) REVIEW PLEASE!