Chapter 11
When Penny and I go back in the RV Jackson and Carl immediately ask a million questions to which I tell them that I don't know what happened, just that Daryl was hurt in the woods. I settle the kids by reading to them from Harry Potter some more. About an hour after everything happened, I'm in the bedroom changing Anneliese and getting ready to feed her when Carol comes into the RV.
"Hi Carol." I greet turning around to face her briefly
"Hi Genevieve. I just came to tell you that we're going to have dinner with Herschel's family in the house today" she says not making eye contact, only looking at her hands
"Okay. Thanks, when should we be up there?" I ask
"Rick said he'd come get you when dinner is done." She says before turning and leaving
"Well okay then, dinner at an actual table sounds nice doesn't it?" I ask the kids, getting distracted nods from them all as they're absorbed in their comic books, and magazine. Enjoying the quiet I feed Anneliese and let her sit propped up for about 15 minutes before grabbing a receiving blanket and laying it on the floor to do tummy time. I remember that Penny liked to have someone be on her level to talk to her and make noises and just keep her calm. So, I lay down on my stomach between the table and the cabinets just in front of Anneliese.
Anneliese isn't a huge fan of tummy time, but she doesn't cry the entire time either. I'm about to get up from the floor when the RV door opens.
"Hello." Rick greets and I turn my head to see his amused smile and raised eyebrow
"Tummy time" I say simply, and he nods in understanding offering me a hand up, so I roll onto my back and let him hoist me to my feet.
"Thanks" I tell him picking Anneliese up from the floor.
"You're welcome. I just came to get y'all because dinner is done" he says, and I nod before grabbing the baby carrier.
"Can you help me put her in? I can do it on my own but it's easier with two sets of hands" I tell him with a laugh, and he nods taking Anneliese from me and helping me settle her into the carrier. I grab the diaper bag just in case I need it and settle her pacifier in her mouth before telling the kids to get a move on.
When they all try to take their magazine or comic books with them, I hold a hand up
"Paper entertainment stays here" I say with a smile at the sighs I get but they all place their respective books down before filing out the door. Once down the steps I grasp Penny's hand and follow Carl and Jackson up to the house with Rick walking next to me.
"How much of Daryl did she see?" he asks in a low voice
"Hopefully not much, she knows he's hurt" I say back lowly but obviously not low enough as Penny looks up at me
"Is Mr. Daryl okay?" she asks Rick more so than me
"Yeah he just got hurt while looking for Sophia. But he'll be okay" he tells her with a soft smile
"Are you sure?" she asks him
"Very sure, he'll be good as new in no time"
"How long?" she asks, and he looks to me for help
"Maybe after dinner we can see Daryl and you can see for yourself that he's okay?" I offer and she nods quickly.
There's almost an awkward silence when we walk into the house and I try not to shift too much as I follow Rick and the kids into the dining room. Carl and Jackson sit together next to Lori and I help Penny into a chair next to Jackson. Rick surprises me by pulling out my chair for me.
"Thanks" I say to him with a smile, and he nods back settling into the chair next to mine. There is an awkward silence around the table save for Carl and Jackson's hushed whispers about a comic book character.
The silence is broken when Carol followed by Maggie, Patricia and Beth file out of the kitchen carrying dishes full of food. Once it's all on the table and everyone is seated. Herschel says a blessing over the food and then we begin serving ourselves.
I give Penny some pasta and peas on her plate and as I cut up her pasta, I see Lori serve Jackson a plate of food along with Carl. Dinner is quiet except for a few small conversations around the table, no one seems very happy to be sitting there. It gets even more awkward when Glenn asks if anyone knows how to play guitar and Patricia says that Otis did.
I decide that now would be a good time to take Daryl some food and prepare him a plate.
"Jackson behave Penny and I will be back in a minute" I tell him before turning to Rick
"We'll take this to Daryl; what room is he in?" I ask
"The room you guys used" he says, and I nod
Penny and I quickly walk up the stairs and stop at the closed door. I knock on it and wait until he says to come in before pushing it open.
"Hey Daryl. We brought you some dinner." I say trying to focus on his face only as he pulls the sheet up to his neck.
"Thanks, you can put it there" He grunts gesturing to the side table
After placing his food down, I guide Penny to stand next to me and she stares at Daryl wide eyed with her thumb in her mouth
"Penny wanted to make sure you were okay" I say
"I'm fine" he grunts out looking very annoyed that we're there
"Are you sure?" Penny speaks up for the first time
"I'm sure" he answers his eyes meeting hers and softening a little
"Gen says that if you don't feel good that you have to tell someone" She says inching closer to his bed, as my eyes widen at her little slip hoping he doesn't notice – but of course he did
"Oh, Gen says that huh?" He says moving his eyes to mine
"Yes, to little girls who don't like telling her they don't feel good. But Penny Mr. Daryl is a grown-up, he can take care of himself" I tell her
"Now come on, let's leave him to eat and rest" I say moving to take her hand
"Feel better Mr. Daryl" Penny tells him and surprises me when she quickly gives him a little kiss on his cheek, before taking my hand.
"Let us know if you need anything" I tell him and only receive a grunt in response.
We leave the bedroom and I pull the door shut behind me.
"What do you think about us reading some before we go to bed?" I ask Penny as we walk downstairs
"Are we going to read Harry Potter?" she asks
"Yea probably" I tell her
"Okay, I like Harry Potter." She says
"Good I'm glad" I say just as we reach the doorway to the dining room, the atmosphere is tense and awkward, and I waste no time grabbing the diaper bag and telling Jackson it's time to go.
He doesn't protest and together we walk back to the RV, where we all settle on the bed and I begin to read from the book, as the sun begins setting.
I know I probably should've stayed and helped clean up, but I'd rather read to the kids and keep them from a tense and somewhat hostile environment, they had enough of that before the world went to shit.
Three hours later, the sun has set, Jackson and Penny have fallen asleep and Anneliese is whining for her bottle. After changing and feeding Anneliese I settle her in her mosses basket and climb into bed myself.
Whining rouses me from my sleep, causing me to sit up and lean over the edge of the bed to check on Anneliese only to find her sound asleep. A rustling on the bed behind me pulls my attention there, where I find Penny squirming with tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Penny, Penny." I call her name gently jostling her shoulder
She slowly opens her eyes and focuses on my face, before letting out a sob and climbing into my lap. I wrap my arms around her, smoothing her hair down with one hand and gently rocking her, making soft shushing noises.
"Did you have a bad dream?" I ask her in a whisper
"Yes" She mumbles
"Do you want to tell me about it?" I ask
"You were like Mr. Daryl, you were hurt momma" she says, her voice increasing in her panic
"Hey, hey Penny look I'm okay. I'm not hurt." I tell her
"But momma what if you get hurt?" she asks
"I won't baby. I won't" I whisper to her pressing a kiss to her head
"What's wrong?" Jackson asks sitting up blearily rubbing his eyes
"Penny just had a nightmare, go back to sleep" I tell him, and he nods rolling over and falling back to sleep.
It takes Penny close to half an hour to calm down and fall back to sleep and then Anneliese is up for her night feeding. Almost 2 hours after Penny first woke me up, I'm able to settle back into bed.
When I sit up from sleep it takes me a second to realize why I was jolted awake, Penny is squirming on the bed and whining again.
"MOMMA!" she yells out and I jump, quickly leaning towards her and grasping her shoulder to rouse her.
"Penny wake up. Come on its just a dream Penny. Wake up!" I see Jackson sit up out of the corner of my eye, Penny doesn't show any signs of waking though and a few seconds later she screams out for me again
"Penny wake up" I try again and no sooner than the words are out of my mouth does the door to the bedroom open behind me, I turn just enough to see Rick standing in the doorframe but quickly refocus on Penny.
"Penny wake up, it's just a dream, it's time to wake up now Penny" Her eyes fly open and she looks around the room quickly before focusing on me.
"Hey Penny, it was just a bad dream you're okay" I tell her pulling her into my lap as she starts to cry again, once her cries settle to hiccups, I shift back to look at her.
"What happened in your dream Pen?" I ask
"You were hurt again, like Mr. Daryl. You were all bloody" she says, and I hear Rick suck in a breath from the doorway.
"I'm okay Penny. I'm not hurt. I'm okay." I tell her and she nods against my neck.
"I was scared Momma" she whispers
"I know Penny, but it was just a dream, I'm okay, you're okay, Jackson and Anneliese are okay. And Mr. Daryl told you himself that he's okay"
"Can I see him again tomorrow?" she asks and before I can answer Anneliese starts to cry
"Can you get her Rick?" I ask him and he nods before quickly moving from the doorframe and scooping Anneliese up
"Her pacifier is on the shelf" I tell him gesturing with my head to the shelf that acts as a nightstand.
He grabs in and puts it in her mouth quickly.
"I'll take Anneliese up to the roof with me so you can get Penny settled" he says, and I nod watching as he leaves and pulls the door shut behind him.
"I think maybe we can go see Mr. Daryl later Penny. Maybe we can take him lunch or something okay?" I ask her and she nods already falling back to sleep
Jackson has laid back down and is just watching us.
When Penny falls back to sleep, I gently lay her down and cover her with the sheet.
"She called you Momma" Jackson whispers and I nod
"But you're not our mom" he whispers
"I know Jackson, but I'm as good as you have now" I tell him
"You were always more of a mom than our real mom" he says, and I smile sadly at him
"Do I have to call you mom too?" he asks
"Not if you don't want to, I love you like your mine no matter what" I say
"I might, I'll think about it" He says with a yawn.
"Okay, go back to sleep. I'm gonna go get Anneliese from Rick" I tell him sliding off of the bed and leaving the room.
Moving through the RV I see that Dale is still asleep. I close the RV door as quietly as I can behind me and ascend the ladder.
"Hey" I say once I'm on top where Rick is sitting in a lawn chair, Anneliese sitting against his chest wide awake.
"Hey, how's Penny?" he asks
"She's asleep, that was her second nightmare of the night." I tell him sinking to sit on the roof of the RV.
"She's dreaming about you being hurt like Daryl?" he questions
"Yea, this past one was much worse, I've never seen her have a nightmare to the point of screaming in her sleep" I say
"It sounded rough, I could hear her while I was up here, doesn't look like Dale budged at all though." He laughs
"No, he's still out, I'm surprised Anneliese didn't wake up sooner" I tell him, and he nods
"I'm sorry she saw that." He tells me
"It's not your fault, if anyone is to blame it's me. I should've made sure she stayed in the RV"
Its silent for a moment and I focus my attention on the faint line of light over the distant trees.
"You're doing a good job" Rick says suddenly
"Huh?"
"You're doing a good job, you're on your own raising 3 kids. Sure, you have the group to help you but when it comes down to it, you're their only parent. Not like how Lori and I both parent Carl, and he's only 1 child!" He says laughing
"Why thank you, I try my hardest" I say
"And not only were you caring for your kids earlier, you were caring for Carl too" he tells me
"I appreciate all of your help Genevieve, I really do. And I think you're doing a good job in this shit hole of world, better than me and Lori at least" he tells me his voice suddenly taking a solemn tone.
"What do you mean?" I question tilting my head to study his face, he's quiet for a moment
"Lori's pregnant." He says surprising me by his willingness to confide in me
"I know" I tell him causing his head to snap towards me and his eyes meet mine searching,
"You know?" He questions
"I saw Maggie give her the abortion pills, I was outside with the kids and Maggie was quite pissed" I tell him quickly following up with "I don't think Carl saw or heard anything, him and Jackson were quite immersed in talking to each other"
"She didn't even tell me, before she took them. She threw them up and we argued. She said she doesn't think it's right to force a baby to be born into this world. But I mean look at you! Look at little Anneliese here. You are managing" he tells me
"I am Rick but it's rough. If I didn't have the group and you especially; to help me as much as y'all do I don't know where we'd be" I tell him honestly
"I can't speak for anyone but if you ever need help with the kids you can come find me and I'll try my best to help you" he says
"Thank you, Rick, that means a lot. It goes the same for you, if you need someone to sit with Carl or keep him occupied for a little while I'm here. Him and Jackson get along great and it's good for them to hang out gives some sense of normalcy to this world." I say before turning my attention back to the sunrise.
"It always feels like the calm before the storm" Rick says
"What does?" I ask
"Sitting up here, watching the sunrise." He says
"Well it seems to have calmed that little storm" I say gesturing to where Anneliese has passed out in Rick's arms.
"That it has" he agrees
"Thanks for coming down to check on us, and for taking her when she started to cry." I tell him
"You're welcome, it takes a village. Especially now"
I stretch my legs out in front of me and lean back on my hands enjoying the warm sun shining on my face as it rises over the trees, and for the first time in a while I let myself fully relax. Jackson and Penny are asleep. Rick is holding a sleeping Anneliese, I could just breathe. Even if only for the next few minutes.