Right so this is my brand shiny new chapter...I hope you like it. If you want the same musical inspiration I had whilst writing it, you might want to listen to Kate Voegele's version of Hallelujah. Oh and leave a review to make me happy! :D

3.48am.

The ticking of the clock on the guest bedroom wall rumbled through the silence as Pete lay there staring at the hands as they pointed mockingly to the ridiculous hour.

3.48a.m and he still couldn't get to sleep.

Having finally managed to drag Harry up to his old room, Pete had given no thought to strolling down the hallway and into the guest bedroom, trying his best to ignore the look of utter desperation and devastation on Allie's face as he went.

He couldn't face her tonight, not after everything that had happened. And the idea of lying next to her, of being able to smell her skin, to feel her lips knowing that Matt had…

"Fuck," he hissed angrily, slamming his fist against the mattress and sitting up quickly, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and resting his elbows on his knees.

He was winding himself up just as he always did; it was a talent which all Dunham's seemed to possess. The ability to make things seem worse than they already were was not something that Pete was proud to call a part of his heritage but there it was.

Drumming his fingers on the edge of the mattress, he debated walking down the hall to his bedroom. He knew what would happen, he would wake Allie up and she would stare up at him, tears would gather in her beautiful eyes and without a word he would lean down and kiss her. She would whisper his name against his lips as she always did, her hands drifting down his back as he claimed her as his then they would wake up in the morning and things would slowly but surely go back to how they had been before.

It seemed so easy…but then why couldn't he do it?

Sighing heavily, Pete forced himself to his feet and yanked on his sweater, not caring all that much that it was still caked in Matt's blood before walking over to the door and opening it as silently as he could.

Tip toeing down the darkened hallway, he stopped only to look in on Alex, a smile pulling at his lips as looked at his son laying flat out, his chubby form wrapped up tightly as he clutched at one of Allie's scarves that he had taken to sleeping with.

With a slight hiccup, the infant fidgeted and then went right back to sleeping, his gentle snores filling the otherwise silent room.

Fighting the urge to go over and hug him, Pete instead walked on to Poppy's room where he knew she would be lying half out of the bed, covers on the floor just like her mother did.

Pete actually laughed out loud when true to form he discovered his daughter sprawled on the bed, her left leg and arm hanging out and a copy of Stuart Little across her chest. Despite having no clue how to pronounce most of the words in it or indeed any knowledge as to what they meant, Poppy was determined to read it, refusing help from any source other than Benjamin.

Knowing that there was little point in tucking her back in, Pete simply shut the door and picked up his pace, knowing that the next door he came across would be the hardest to pass.

Lara's bedroom still haunted him and even though he had on occasion brought himself to go in there, it wasn't an experience that he overly enjoyed.

But as he neared it, he noticed it was slightly ajar, an eerie looking blue glow coming from within.

Frowning and preparing to chuck Harry out on his drunken arse, Pete peered in, blinking in surprise when he spotted Allie sat on the bed in one of his old sweaters from University, her eyes red and puffy as she stared at the TV.

Following her gaze, Pete's heart skipped when he saw Lara on the screen laughing as she whispered something in Allie's ear.

He recognised it immediately as their wedding video, his heart swelling as he took in how stunning Allie had looked that day. Her eyes flashing mischievisouly as she blew a piece of hair out of her eyes, squeaking in surprise when Pete himself picked her up and spun her around, whispering something into her ear which made her laugh.

His fingers tightened on the doorframe as he watched the scene unfold, the younger versions of himself, his wife and their friends laughing and dancing, not caring about anything and so unaware of what the future held for them. Glancing at Lara once more he felt his throat tighten and pushed back from the door, running down the hallway full pelt, his movements still silent despite their pace.

It was only as the front door closed that Allie let herself sob out loud, wondering why despite how close they were he didn't realise that she had seen him.

Dave blinked twice into the darkness, his brow furrowed in confusion as he tried to work out where the loud banging noise was coming from.

Turning to look at Aimee who was still fast asleep, he gently pulled his arm out from under her and flexed his fingers, trying to wake the limp up before stumbling out of the bedroom and through the flat he shared with his fiancé.

The banging continued, its pace quicker and seemingly more desperate until with a forceful and rather pissed off yank, Dave opened the door.

"Pete?" the older man frowned. "Fuckin' 'ell mate its 4 in the morning,"

"I know," Pete nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets and smirking lightly. "Don't suppose you fancy a pint do ya?"

It was a mere five minutes later that the two men found themselves sat on the roof of Dave's apartment building, each of them clutching a bottle of Corona and pretending that the iciness of the air wasn't getting to them.

"So, Matt kissed 'er?" Dave repeated for what had to be the fifth time.

"Yep," Pete shrugged and took a long sip of beer.

"What a cunt," Dave muttered, shaking his head and proceeding to peel the label off of the half frozen bottle.

"She said sorry," Pete mumbled, looking up at the sky. "Allie was stood there and she was crying and begging me to forgive 'er and…" he shook his head and laughed sadly. "She asked me to hold 'er and I couldn't do it,"

Dave gulped down his mouthful of beer hard and stared at the blonde.

"What the fuck does that say about me?" Pete whispered. "She's my wife and I couldn't even look at 'er…I just…" he rubbed the back of his neck. "Dave, I don't know what's goin' on with me at the moment. I can't suss 'er out, y'know?"

"Pete," Dave shook his head. "Come on mate, this is Allie. Little miss shot contest 05, the same bird who sings the whole way home in the taxi when we're pissed, the same Allie whose shit at FIFA, rips the piss out of 'erself constantly and…"

"When was the last time you saw 'er do any of that?" Pete interrupted. "When was the last time you saw Allie laugh properly? Or piss about? And I mean before Lara died…she's…" he shook his head. "I'm losin' 'er because she's losing herself…I know that don't make any fuckin' sense but…"

"Have you told her this?" Dave asked him seriously. "I mean have you actually sat her down and said any of this to 'er?"

"Oh yeah," Pete snorted. "That'd go down a fuckin' treat right now wouldn't it?"

"Pete, do you love 'er or not?" Dave asked him.

The blonde looked up at him as though he had just been slapped, his mouth slightly agape as he stared at his mate.

"You what?" he whispered.

"Allie," Dave clarified. "D'you still love 'er?"

Pete closed his eyes for a long moment, the realisation making his body freeze up, his heart pound and his mouth feel dry as he tried to get his brain to function, whilst Dave's words still echoed around his brain.

"Do you still love her?"

"Pete?" Dave prompted, pulling the bottle of beer away from his lips as he stared as his friend in horror.

The tears shimmering in the blonde mans eyes reflected the faint light around them as he turned and dropped his head into his hands, the sobs shaking his body and giving Dave his answer.

Harry Harding grasped the side of his head as he stumbled down the darkened hallway, the faint moonlight creeping in through the half closed curtains at the end of the hall creating eerie shadows as he made his way towards the bathroom.

As if on queue his stomach heaved again and with a loud hiccup, he grimaced, tasting vomit.

Nearing Lara's bedroom door, his paced slowed down just as it always did, his mind daring his body to obey his heart and peer in, if only for a second. If only to let the smell of her hit him, to stare at the bed and remember nights he had spent in it with her, to run his fingers along the cotton sheets and pretend it was her skin.

The taste of vomit seemed to grow stronger at the thought and so he picked up his pace, not stopping until he was downstairs and away from any threat of going in there.

Not bothering to switch on any of the lights he walked into the kitchen and with shaking hands reached for a glass, turning on the tap and listening to the water crash into the sink.

Glancing up, he sighed heavily briefly wondering if the pain in his head would ever cease. The headache he had acquired earlier after passing out on the pavement was yet to leave him and the constant thumping on his cranium was making it hard for him to do anything other than focus on his need to vomit.

It was then that he caught it, the movement so small and so hidden by the darkness outside that he had to blink a few times to assure himself he wasn't imagining things.

Bringing the now overflowing glass of water over to rest on the counter, Harry squinted out into the garden and shook his head.

"What the hell…" he mumbled, switching off the tap and walking through the colossal kitchen to the back door which was open just enough to let in some of the cold January wind.

Stepping outside, he grimaced as his feet made contact with the freezing cold paved slabs of the patio. Resisting the urge to run back in and put some shoes on, he propelled himself forwards towards the lone figure sat on the swing set, legs kicking back and forth lazily as she stared up at the unfeasibly clear sky.

"You do realise we have a fully functional living room indoors, don't you?" he called out, coming to a stop next to his sister and sitting on the swing next to hers. "It has a fire place, sofa…even the odd bit of carpet. In fact if you look close enough there's a whole bloody house in there,"

"How's the head?" Allie asked him quietly, not turning her face away from the sky.

"Uh…it's been better," Harry told her honestly. "But then head-butting a pavement after a bottle of JD is hardly the plan of the century is it?"

Allie didn't answer him and he sighed. Ever since Harry could remember Allie had been more than his sister…she had been his best mate. Whenever something went wrong, she was always the first person he would seek out, whenever he had a shit day or ended up in the dog house with Lara, it was always Allie that he would call.

Yet now as he sat next to her, she felt like a stranger. The lines drawn between them almost too much for him to bear, almost too deep for him to wonder if they could ever be prepared.

"You know the first time I ever kissed Lara was on these swings," Harry told her, the smile in his voice evident even in the dark. "It was your sixteenth birthday party and I remember she was sat there whinging on and on about how you were there with James and she had no one…"

"She hated James," Allie smiled to herself, recalling all the times Lara would sit her down and beg her to break up with him. He hadn't been a bad guy by any means but Lara had considered him boring. Which after he took her to the London science museum on their fifth date, Allie had to agree with.

"Yeah well the only way I could get her to shut up was by kissing her," Harry smirked. "Not that it went down all that well," he laughed. "Silly bitch punched me for it,"

"You told everyone you got that black eye from rugby," Allie laughed.

"I know," he nodded. "It seemed a little more dignified than telling my mates that a five foot nothing red head thumped me one for making a move on her,"

"Uh-huh," Allie laughed. "I'll bet,"

Harry looked down at his bare legs and saw the goose bumps covering his skin; jamming his hands in between his knees he prayed that they would warm up, not wanting to go back inside and risk ruining the moment.

"I'm sorry for everything I said today," he mumbled, looking down at the ground as it moved slowly underneath him. "I didn't mean any of it…you've got to know that Allie, you're the last person I would ever…" he shook his head. "I'm just so completely fucked right now…"

"I know," she nodded. "I know, Harry,"

Looking up at the sky, Harry let out a deep breath and shook his head, laughing quietly to himself as he reached into the pocket of his sweater and pulled out the small black velvet box he'd been carrying for the last fortnight.

"I uh…I wanted to tell you about this…I thought, well I uh, I hoped that we'd both get to tell you…" Harry held out his hand.

Allie skidded to a stop on her swing, hands tightening on the ropes either side of her as she stared at the box in horror, her throat closing up as she shook her head lightly.

"Harry…" she whispered, picking it out of his hand and opening it.

The ring inside sparkled almost mockingly in the moonlight, the small stone set in the middle of it glistening like a tear drop.

"Pete knew about it," he shrugged. "I had to tell someone before I had a bloody heart attack,"

Allie continued to stare down at the ring, unsure of what to do or say.

"I uh…I was planning on asking her on New Years Eve," he stuttered. "All these moments kept coming up when I thought ok, now's the time but then it would occur to me that I had all the time in the world…"

Allie closed her eyes as those words and felt a coldness sweep through her that she knew wasn't down to the wind.

"And now I fucking hate myself for not asking her earlier…" Harry's voice broke slightly and he curled his hands into fists. "I just…I wish I could have told her how much it all meant…how much I…"

"She would have said yes," Allie interrupted, meeting his eyes in the darkness for the first time since he had come outside.

Harry looked at her with so much hope and pain in his eyes that she felt her own start to sting with the now familiar sensation of tears.

"You reckon?" he half laughed.

"Without a doubt," she nodded. "It wouldn't have even taken her a second,"

Harry nodded and shook his head, a half sob escaping his lips as he let his chin rest on his chest.

"She would have made you sweat though," Allie smiled. "Lara always said she's never go easily,"

Harry laughed and looked up at his little sister, tears streaming down his face as he stared at her with utter desperation.

"I'm so fucked, Allie," he whispered. "I want her back so much…I can't deal without her being here, I mean look at me, I'm a complete fucking mess…"

"Hey," Allie shook her head and placed a comforting hand on his arm. "I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and tell you that its ok and that it'll get better because right now, I know how shitty you feel. I know how much it hurts without Lara here but…she loved you, Harry. She loved you so much and if nothing else then just hold onto that…"

Allie stared at her brother as he fell apart, biting her lip with worry as she tried to think of something to say.

"Well if you can't hold onto that just remember what a pain in the arse she was," Allie giggled. "At least you won't have to spend the rest of your life listening to her ramble on about shoes…"

"Oh yeah," He laughed. "That woman and shoes…it was a scary combination,"

"Scarier than me?" Allie asked him.

"Oh Jesus, are you kidding?" Harry smirked. "You were tame compared to her. Lara Knight was the only person I ever saw knock a kid out of the way just to get to a pair of boots,"

Allie laughed and tilted her head back, pretending for a moment that Lara was there with them, waiting for the moment when she would pipe up and smack her playfully before jumping on Harry and tackling him to the floor.

The moment never came and so they both sat there staring at each other.

"I miss her," Harry nodded, wiping his eyes bashfully. "I really bloody miss her, Allie,"

"I know," she smiled tightly, tightening her hand on his. "Believe me I know,"

They sat in silence for a few minutes, neither of making a sound despite the tears rolling down their faces.

"Come on," Harry let go of her hand and shoved the ring back into his pocket, securing it there and vowing to pretend for a while that he didn't actually have it. That Lara would never see it.

"I used to trash you on these when we were little," Harry smirked, swinging his legs back and kicking off of the ground. "Let's see if you can beat me this time,"

"Bring it on, bitch," Allie laughed, doing the same and building up a fast pace until the stars above her began to blur into a glittering white stripe above them.

"I think I just heard something snap!" Harry laughed, pulling his legs back even further despite his worry.

"Whatever," Allie shrieked. "You're just being a wimp, as usual,"

"Screw you, Dunham," Harry shot back, stressing her last name.

"That's not much of a greeting,"

The voice caused Allie to almost lose grip on the ropes, straightening her legs a little too quickly to bring herself to a stop. Her bare feet skidded along the muddy grass and she jolted forward, stumbling a few yards in front of her to where Pete was standing, his face pale and gaunt as he looked at her, his bright blue eyes completely unreadable.

She panted, unsure of what to say as he looked back and forth between her and Harry for a few seconds before his eyes locked onto hers, making her heart thump wildly in her chest.

"I uh, I need to talk to you," he mumbled, shoving his hands into his pockets to ward off the cold.

Allie stared at him, her mouth slightly agape as she let herself revel in the realisation that he was speaking to her for the first time in two days.

"Allie," he prompted. "Please?"

"Sure," she nodded, holding out her hand for him to take. "We should go inside,"

"Yeah," Pete nodded, glancing down at her hand and then back up at her face. Swallowing the lump in his throat he stepped around it and started towards the house leaving Allie staring after him.

"Oh shit," Harry piped up, still out of breath himself. "That doesn't sound good, does it?"

"No," Allie shook her head, trying to convince herself that the cold was the only reason she was shaking like a leaf. "No it doesn't,"

So as you can tell I'm still in melodrama mode! I'm watching way too much One Tree Hill at the moment! But nonetheless it would make me so happy to read some reviews. Pretty please?! Thanks for reading guys xx