Chapter 21
"So whatcha gonna do? We'd all feel better if we knew the plan." Lori asks pouring a cup of coffee
"Is there a plan?" Andrea asks moving around Lori and the fire to drop her plate in the dish bin
"We gonna keep him here?" Glenn asks
"We'll know soon enough" Rick says just as Daryl walks up from his "talk" with Randall in the shed
"Boy there's got a gang, 30 men" he says coming to a stop next to my chair where I'm feeding the baby
"They have heavy artillery and they ain't looking to make friends. They roll through here; our boys are dead. And our women, they're gonna – they're gonna wish they were"
"What did you do?" Carol asks
"Had a little chat" Daryl says glancing at his bloodied knuckles, shaking my head to myself I grab the towel resting on the dish bin and hand it to him
"No one goes near this guy" Rick instructs
"Rick, what are you gonna do?" Lori asks
"We have no choice. He's a threat. We have to eliminate the threat."
"You're just gonna kill him?" Dale asks looking completely disgusted
"It's settled. I'll do it today" Rick says before walking off, Dale following behind
I can just barely hear Dale tell Rick that he can't do this as they walk off
Shane moves off to his tent, Carol, and Lori head up to the house with Maggie. T-Dog and Glenn go off to wherever they go during the day and Andrea heads into the RV instead of on top of it for a change
"Daryl, sit down for a sec. I'll grab the first aid kit. Carl, Jackson go get your schoolbooks." I instruct
"You don't have to do that" Daryl tries to protest
"Here hold her" I tell him and place Anneliese in his arm that isn't bloody before jogging into the RV to grab the first aid kit
By the time I've returned to the fire, Daryl is settled into a chair with Anneliese contently cooing at him and his crossbow resting against his chair
"Let me see your hand please" I request kneeling in front of him and opening the first aid kit
"Did you get the answers you wanted from him?" I ask dabbing at the cuts
"I got answers, don't think they're anything any of us wanted though"
"You think Rick should kill him?"
"Don't know. He's too much of a risk to have here at the farm but an even bigger risk to just let him go" he says, and I hum grabbing the antibiotic ointment to apply to his knuckles
"Keeping him here or letting him go would be putting your life, the kids' lives at risk. His group aren't nice people" he continues
"I believe you Daryl. I do. And I understand I just wish there was another way you know. Killing someone when there's so little life anyway seems…I don't even know."
I continue bandaging his hand in silence turning what he said over and over in my head. From what I've gathered Randall's group sound like they would keep the women alive for fun and would kill the men. And that wouldn't be good I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But Randall seems so young, and second chances are sometimes for the better. And who's to say his group has even stuck around these parts, they probably decided he was good as dead. But then there's the possibility that they are still close and that he could find them, and I just can't think of risking the kids like that
"There you go, the bandage doesn't need to stay on long, just long enough for the medicine to soak in and then you'll be fine. Try not to get them dirty though, I don't think I could treat an infection and Herschel might just kill us all himself if we need any more antibiotics or painkillers", I joke packing everything up before looking up to meet Daryl's eyes
"Thanks Gen"
"Of course. If you want to hunt today you should probably head out" I tell him pushing off the ground and standing
"I think I'll stick around here today; bow could use a cleaning "
"Alright" I say accepting Anneliese from him as he stands and grabs his crossbow before making his way to his tent
"Y'all should just continue from where you left off yesterday. Penn you have some letters left to trace, don't you?" I ask turning to the kids
"Yeah, and some numbers" She answers
"Alright go ahead and do those and once you're done, we'll work on something else okay?"
"Okay Mama"
"Boys, start with math and I'll check on where you are when I'm finished with the dishes" I tell them motioning for them to go sit at the picnic table a few feet away before securing Anneliese in her sling
"Alright little one, let's get these dishes done and then we'll see about some tummy time huh"
Dishes don't take long and once I'm done, I set the kids up doing more schoolwork and then gather laundry from everyone and start on that
"Can I see him?" I hear Carl ask and I glance up to see him walking with Shane
"No, look, man, this is – this is grown-up stuff, all right? You just let us handle this." Shane answers him before walking off
"Carl come here for a second please" I call, and he heads towards me with no hesitation
"Did you get done your schoolwork?" I ask
"Yeah, is it okay if I go talk to mom?" he asks
"Of course, it is, she's your mother after all. You know where I'll be if you want to help with the laundry" I tell him
"No thank you" he laughs before running off, presumably to head into the house and find Lori
Laughing to myself I turn back to the laundry but not before glancing at Andrea and Shane talking outside the shed that Randall is in
My attention is pulled towards them again when I hear the door bang open followed by Shane and Andrea both yelling
I feel my jaw drop when I see Shane haul Carl out of the shed and waste no time hurrying over to them
"You could've gotten hurt in there" I hear Shane say still holding onto Carl's arm
"I can handle myself" Carl protests trying to pull out of his grip
"Let me tell you something- "
"Let him go" I say coming to a stop just behind Shane pulling both of their attentions to me.
"You stay away from him. You hear me" Shane says letting go of his arm
"You won't tell my parents, will you?" Carl asks
"Carl man, this- this ain't bout getting in trouble okay? A guy like that will say anything to you. He'll try to make you feel sorry for him. He'll try to make you let your guard down. You let your guard down out here people die"
"That's enough Shane" I interrupt "Carl go up to the house, find your mother and stay there with her or I will be speaking to your parents" I order, and Carl only hesitates for a second glancing between me and Shane before running to the house. This time I watch as he walks up the stairs and inside
"That boy is gonna get himself killed" Shane huffs and while I don't entirely agree I can't deny that I am also angry
"Why wasn't he with you?" Andrea asks
"I was doing laundry; he was with my kids doing schoolwork until he finished and said he was going to talk to Lori. I didn't think I had to watch him walk into the house but now I guess I will" I say shaking my head
"Don't let him near the shed again. Him or your kids" Shane tells me
"I don't plan on it" I tell him before turning and walking back to my laundry to try and hang it before Anneliese wakes up demanding to be fed
At some point while I was sitting with the kids at the picnic table Carl followed Rick out of the house as Rick headed towards the barn and I assume Rick asked him to stay outside because Carl stood kicking at rocks in the dirt. Not long after Lori emerges from the house and talks to him for a second before moving into the barn herself
Carl has started picking something up off the ground – I assume its rocks – by the time Carol emerges from somewhere and starts talking to him
I keep an eye on him as he says something back to her before walking off into the field by the fence
"You need to control that boy" I hear Carol call to Rick and Lori as they start walking away from the barn
I can't hear what else is said but I can see Lori and Carol exchanging words as Rick heads after Carl. Deciding that Carl will be fine once Rick is with him, I round up Penny and Jack and go in the RV, where I settle Jack at the table doing language arts work and the girls in the back taking a nap.
"Hey Gen, you got a second to talk?" Dale asks poking his head in the door
"Sure" I tell him joining him outside the RV
"Do you think what they're planning is right?" he asks outright
"I don't know. Honestly, Dale, I don't know. It doesn't feel right to kill him but if he got back to his group and brought them down upon us…I just can't risk my kids like that" I tell him
"So, you don't think they should kill him?" he asks
"I don't know"
"Well look, Rick's gonna have a vote when the sun starts going down in the house. Make sure you're there"
"Okay" I answer him before going back inside
When the sun starts going down, I lead the kids from the RV up to the house where Lori is leading Carl
"Gen, the kids can stay with Carl and Jimmy upstairs" Rick tells me as I move past him at the door and I nod my thanks
"You heard him, go on up" I tell them gently pushing them up the stairs before leaning against the wall next to Daryl
"So how do we do this? Just take a vote?" Glenn asks once all of the kids are upstairs
"Does it have to be unanimous?" Andrea asks
"How about majority rules?" Lori proposes
"Well let's just see where everybody stands, then we can talk through the options." Rick says
"Well, where I sit, there's only one way forward." Shane starts
"Killing him, right?" Dale snaps "I mean why bother to even take a vote? It's clear which way the wind's blowing"
"Well, if people believe we should spare him, I wanna know." Rick states bracing his hands on the back of the couch
"Well, I can tell you it's a small group – maybe just me and Glenn" Dale says and from glancing at Glenn's face he may not be entirely right in that
"Look I – I think you're pretty much right about everything, all the time, but this – "
"They've got you scared" Dales says cutting Glenn off
"He's not one of us" Glenn retorts "And we've – we've lost too many people already."
"Gen wasn't a part of our group, but you all accepted her" Dale protests
"Gen didn't try to shoot us when she saw us" Rick says before I can even open my mouth
"How about you? Do you agree with this?" Dale asks Herschel and Maggie
"Couldn't we continue keeping him prisoner?" Maggie asks
"Just another mouth to feed" Daryl speaks up
"It may be a lean winter" Hershel adds
"We could ration better" Lori suggests
"Well, he could be an asset." Dale protests "Give him a chance to prove himself"
"Put him to work" Glenn says with a shrug
"We're not letting him walk around" Rick says shaking his head
"We could put an escort on him" Maggie offers
"Who wants to volunteer for that duty?" Shane asks
"I will" Dale volunteers
"I don't think any of us should be walking around with this guy" Rick protests
"He's right. I wouldn't feel safe unless he was tied up" Lori says earning herself looks from both me and Daryl cause isn't that a flip from what she was just saying
"We can't exactly put chains around his ankles, sentence him to hard labor" Andrea says
"Look, say we let him join us, right? Maybe he's helpful, maybe he's nice. We let our guard down and maybe he runs off, brings back his 30 men" I may not like Shane, but he has a point, and I can tell Daryl thinks the same as he shifts against the wall next to me
"So, the answer is to kill him, to prevent a crime that he may never even attempt?" Dale asks "If we do this. We're saying there's no hope. Rule of law is dead. There is no civilization"
"Oh my god" Shane mumbles
"Could you drive him further out? Leave him like you planned?" Herschel asks
"You barely came back this time." Lori says and I scoff, yeah because the men acted like children and beat each other up
"There are walkers. You could break down. You could get lost" she continues
"Or get ambushed" Daryl adds
"They're right. We should not put our own people at risk." Glenn sighs
"If you go through with it, how would you do it? Would he suffer?" Patricia asks
"We could hang him, right? Just snap his neck." Shane offers
"I thought about that. Shooting him may be more humane" Rick says
"What about the body? Do we bury him?" T-Dog asks
"Hold on, hold on." Dale calls out before anyone can answer T-Dog "You're talking about this like its already decided."
"You've been talking all day, going around in circles. You just wanna go round in circles again?" Daryl asks standing up from leaning on the wall, pacing away from it, and coming to a stop in front of me when Dale snaps at everyone
"This is a young's man life! And it is worth more than a five-minute conversation. Is this what it's come to? We kill someone because we can't decide what else to do with him? You saved him and now look at us. He's been tortured. He's gonna be executed. How are we any better than those people we are so afraid of?" Dale asks
"We all know what needs to be done" Shane says after a moment of silence
"No Dale is right" Whoop there's the circle again "We can't leave any stone unturned here. We have a responsibility" Rick says
"So, what's the other solution?" Andrea asks
"Let Rick finish" Lori interrupts
"We haven't come up with a single viable option yet. I wish we could" Andrea plows on and Daryl huffs before leaning against the wall next to me again just as Anneliese starts to shift in her sling against my chest
"So, let's work on it" Dale practically yells
"We are" Rick protests
"Stop it. Just stop it" Carol speaks up "I'm sick of everybody arguing and fighting. I didn't ask for this. You can't ask us to decide something like this. Please decide either of you – both of you but leave me out."
"Not speaking out or killing him yourself; there's no difference" Dale says and woah isn't that harsh
"All right, that's enough" Rick interrupts "Anyone that wants the floor before we make a final decision has the chance" Rick offers, and no one moves
"You once said that we don't kill the living." Dale says to Rick trying to appeal to him
"Well, that was before the living tried to kill us"
"But don't you see? If we do this, the people that we were- the world that we knew is dead. And this new world is ugly. It's harsh. Its survival of the fittest. And that's a world I don't wanna live in. and I don't believe that any of you do. I can't. Please. Let's just do what's right." Dale pleads and at the sight of tears in his eyes I can't help but feel bad for the man
"Isn't there anyone else who's gonna stand with me?" he asks
"He's right" Andrea says "We should try to find another way"
Shane is looking at her like she's lost it, and Lori glances over to me and Daryl before looking back at Rick
"Anybody else?" Rick asks, turning to make eye contact with all of us but no one else speaks up
"Are y'all gonna watch too? No, you'll go hide your heads in your tents and try to forget that we're slaughtering a human being. Whoa. I won't be a party to it." He says choking up before moving past all of us
"This group is broken" He says to Daryl grasping his shoulder before walking out the door and letting the screen slam behind him with a bang causing Anneliese to jolt awake with a cry
After a small, short dinner, Patricia herds the kids upstairs to sit with her, Herschel, Beth, and Jimmy while Daryl, Shane and Rick go to execute Randall. Knowing that the kids are okay upstairs I head to the RV to change Anneliese and feed her and then I join Andrea, Carol, T-Dog, Maggie, and Glenn around the fire.
"I feel bad for Dale" Andrea says
"Why?" Glenn asks
"His heart is too pure; he can't see the reality of some situations"
Before anyone can answer the sound of approaching footsteps pulls everyone's eyes to Rick
Rick who is leading the two boys I left at the farmhouse
"We're keeping him in custody for now" Rick says but my eyes are solely focused on Jackson who is a step behind him as if trying to use him as a shield.
"I'm going to find Dale" Andrea announces standing from her spot
"Carl, go inside. Now please" Lori orders
"Go with him Jackson" I snap and watch as both boys make their way up to the house their heads bowed, Maggie and Glenn following behind them
"They followed us." Rick says to Lori
"They wanted to watch, and I couldn't- "Rick explains
"That's okay" Lori tells him placing a hand on his shoulder and he nods glancing around at the rest of us before taking a seat next to me
"Don't be too hard on him, I think Carl convinced him"
"That's the second time today Carl has disobeyed something I told him directly" I tell him
"I'm sorry, I don't know what else to do" he sighs
"Its fine, I will be having a talk with Jackson regardless of who told him to do anything. He knows better than to go against what I've said. Especially now" I say, and he nods
I've just burped Anneliese, when screams echo across the farm breaking the silence our group has fallen into
"T-Dog get a shotgun now" Rick orders flying to his feet and moving towards the source and none of us waste any time in following him
I hold tight to Anneliese as I jog after them
"Dale!" I hear Andrea yell from the field and dread fills my body as more screaming comes from the field
I can't see much but I can tell that it's Daryl that tackles something, before standing and screaming for help
"Help! Over here! Run!" he yells before kneeling back down
"Who is it?" Andrea asks before covering her face as she comes to a stop
I can't help my gasp that leaves me as I come to a stop just behind her.
Dale is laying on the ground, his stomach ripped open and blood flowing everywhere
"Oh my God"
"Oh God"
"Rick?!" Lori calls
"Listen to me, all right? Just listen to me. Okay, hold on. Get Herschel!" Rick yells kneeling beside him "He needs blood. We gotta operate now"
"Hang on Dale" Andrea says falling to her knees where Daryl previously was
Daryl who has now paced around the group and come to a stop at my side
"Listen to me. Okay, listen to my voice" Rick says as Glenn skids to a stop Maggie right behind him
"All right. Please. Herschel! We need Herschel!" Rick yells
"Look at me" Andrea sobs
"Dale, we're gonna help. We're here. Just hold on" Rick tells him as he moans and pants
"What happened?" Herschel asks
"What can we do?" Rick asks instead of answering
"Dale, it's gonna be okay" Glenn tells him kneeling next to Andrea
I can't help but clutch Anneliese tighter as tears fill my eyes. Daryl shifts his weight towards me, and I lean my shoulder into his
"Can we move him?" Rick asks and it sounds like he's crying too
"He won't make the trip" Herschel says
"You have to do the operation here. Glenn get back to the house!" Rick orders standing up
"Rick!" Herschel yells grabbing his shoulder and shaking his head no
"No!" Rick yells spinning in a circle as if looking for anyone or anything that could help.
"Oh God" Andrea sobs
And as Rick pulls out his gun I glance around, everyone is crying – even Shane looks like he's about to as Rick kneels back down next to Dale and then I notice Carl looking from behind T-Dog before he turns to Lori crying. I look around and thankfully don't see any of my kids before my attention is pulled back to Dale as he coughs and sputters on blood
"He's suffering" Andrea whispers
"Do something!" She demands looking at Rick
"Come on" Shane mumbles
"Oh God" Andrea groans as Rick points his gun at Dale's head and then he seems to freeze
It's only a second before Daryl leans his weight more into me, before he moves over to Rick and takes the gun from his hand
"Sorry, brother" he says, and I close my eyes against my tears, holding Anneliese tighter as a single shot echoes in the air around us, followed only by the sound of everyone's sobs