I don't own Danny Phantom or Grossology. Their respective companies own them. Joe Gutchern is an original character.
Earlier today, Lance Boil laughed maniacally as he tested out his latest experiment. The results were just as he wanted and more.
"This is perfect!" He cried out, dancing to an imaginary tune. "Those dorkologists won't know what to do. And I'll be running the department of Grossology soon enough! Ha! Ha! Hahaha!"
The tiny man with a giant boil for a head kept to a rhythm as the Joe's watched, confused by the man's actions. Bioengineering is not a strong suit for the two, especially Gutchern, who asked Sloppy a question whenever he was curious. Meaning at every word Boil uttered.
"Is this guy really a villain? I mean, his plan sounds like one, but I'm not sure," the ghost asked.
"He's a villain, just a gross one. Not a lot of us in that department," Sloppy Joe answered back.
"I always thought villains did stuff like kidnap the hero's girlfriend," Gutchern commented.
That got Lance boiling mad as he hopped around and snapped at the two Joe's. It wasn't intimidating to the much larger men. They could never see the small man as a threat. Though it was funny how the tiny man jumped and flailed his arms.
"Don't you dare compare me to the common everyday villain!" Lance yelled. "I! Am! The grossest criminal mastermind to walk this earth! And no one will even think to doubt me after this plan!"
"What is it?" Sloppy asked. The large overweight man walked to the lab and picked up a vial. It looked like something of the filthiest substance on earth. It had the living Joe smiling with glee.
"This stuff looks...nasty," Sloppy said before guffawing.
"It seems familiar," Gutchern commented. "Is this what you scrapped off me?"
"Hands off, you simpletons!" Boil commanded as he grabbed the vial with an evil look in his eyes. "This stuff is nastier than anything I've done. And the best part is those grossologists won't be able to stop me."
Lance's evil laugh echoed in his lair as he danced with the glass vial. Its contents swirled and partially glowed. Today was going to be his greatest achievement as he plays out his grossest crime ever. While confused, the Joe's joined in with a jog of their own.
Danny and the grossologists were pinned by the two Joe's. Goop, gunk, and whatever else the two had on hand flew at them as Lance Boil popped up on the screen.
"Citizens of ringworm city! I hope you all are enjoying my latest gross creation. I call it Everything Gross Skin. Right now, you people are mass-producing all manners of fluids and waste products as the virus adds more. Soon everyone will be a walking pile of everything gross, turning this city into a cesspool of disgustingness."
Everyone in Ringworm city gaged, groaned, moaned, and threw up at the news. The infected even more so as they realized what was happening to them-especially those whose pants were full.
"So, this is what the guy was up to?" Danny said in disgust as he saw this. He was now certain his gag reflex was going to break after today.
"That's not good," Ty remarked.
"And things will get worse if we don't stop this," Abby added.
"Any plans? I'm all open for ideas," Danny asked her.
"You're asking me?"
"Well, I don't see your brother with a plan." Danny pointed with his thumb.
"Give me a break. We've never been in a situation like this before," Ty retorted.
Unfortunately, the two Joe's kept up their barrage. Sloppy gulped down a bunch of citrus acid as Gutchern started hacking. The sudden pause gave the teens room to move but also had them out in the open as the Joes spewed forth chunks of ectoplasmic garbage-filth-vomit with streams of watered-down stomach acid.
Danny, Abby, and Ty managed to dodge with a series of flips, slides, and improvised shielding, though the ghost boy had better protection with his powers.
"Here, have a blast of ghost rays!" Danny yelled as he sent a blast at them.
"You creeps could use a deep scrubbing," Abby said as she fired with the new goop cannon.
"Yeah, and we got the soap," Ty said as he did the same.
The two Joe's laughed at that. They dodged everything as Sloppy slid along his stomach while Gutchern slithered between the air and ground.
"You kiddies need to learn how to aim. You couldn't hit the broad side of a barn," Sloppy Joe guffawed.
"Yeah, I've seen better aim from the Box Ghost," Gutchern added, and the fight continued.
"Says the guy as big as a barn," Danny quipped as he landed a blast on the unhygienic man. Sloppy Joe flew back as his slippery sweat slid him into a nearby lampost.
Sloppy Joe rubbed his head as he got up. The grossologists aimed their goop cannons but found themselves under attack by Joe Gutchern.
The specter raced towards them, fling and vomiting the filth on and inside him. The barrage was too much to fight back as Ty and Abby ducked behind a car for cover. The ghostly goo came rapid, bring the car and almost kicking it off as the duo held the vehicle down with sticky goop on the wheels.
After a while, Gutchern stopped suddenly, lying down and gripping his head and moaning. Sloppy Joe noticed and ran over, helping the filthy ghost up.
"You ok?" Sloppy asked.
"I feel...weak...and some pain," Gutchern wheezed.
This gave the teens ample time to get up. Ty and Abby aimed their goop cannons. Equipped with Fenton technology, the two fired foamy goop, hitting Sloppy Joe and knocking him back a few feet. A loud hiss was heard as the foamy dissipated, and the man found his greasy green skin turned into a pink, albino color. He was clean. His stench, built from the months of him rolling in garbage, bathing in sewage, lathering himself in jam, and diving around in a few septic tanks, was gone in a few spots.
"My stench. My wonderful stinky smell," The man gasped as the audacity of the new goop and quickly rubbed his hands on the spots, giving it back some of its filth. but it would take days of dirty work for a proper build-up. "What did you do!?"
"Just a new batch of goop for those hard-to-clean spots," Abby quipped as she and Ty aimed at Gutchern. "Now, let's see how it can handle mold, poop, garbage, and other tough stains."
She fired almost immediately as Ty followed her actions.
"No!" Sloppy cried out as his ghostly friend noticed the goop shot.
Gutchern screamed and hissed as he felt his layers fall off. His filth melted off as if he were coated in acid. In his pain, the ghost phased into the ground, scraping the goop off of him in the process. Taking no chances, he came up behind Ty as his rage produced a claw of hardened garbage bones from his hand and brought it down.
"Ty!" Abby cried out as she lunged forward, knocking her brother out of the way.
She managed to avoid the talons with a flip, but Gutchern still slammed his hand into the concrete road they were fighting on. With a crack, he lifted his hand, revealing a large hole in the ground.
"You'll pay for ruining such a great stench!" He said in anger.
He turned around to face his young foes.
"Oh, please, what's so great about it? We've smelt it a hundred times already," Ty mocked.
"Then prepare for a new stench, you brats!..."The gross villain yelled
Gutchern was to take a swing but held his head again. It was throbbing more. And both the throbbing and the goop being shot at him was becoming too much. He went underground again, reappearing beside Sloppy Joe.
"You sure you're alright?" Sloppy asked.
"I...don't know," Gutchern replied.
Suddenly, he felt pain flaring all over as he kneeled over. It was almost too much.
Sloppy Joe saw this and grabbed Gutchern as the grossologists fired. He knew what the goop did to him, but it hurt his ghostly friend more. He ran as fast as his skinny legs could run. He tripped and slid down the road at a faster pace.
While the grossologists ran, Danny flew after them. He was close, hot on Sloppy's tail before the filthy man looked back with a wicked grin.
"Sorry, but you don't have enough gas," he guffaws, farting loudly as the toots hit the ghost boy in the face. "Unlike me."
"Gahhh!" Danny screamed, stopping in mid-flight. "Gross! I think...I think I can taste it! Yuck!"
The Joe's got away via an improvised fart-powered sleigh ride across town. He stopped in front of an abandoned factory, where he carried Gutchern inside and placed him on a discarded couch.
"Don't worry, buddy. You're old pal Joe won't let those grossologists hurt ya," Sloppy said.
"Thanks, Joe," Gutchern wheezed with a soft smile. He quickly went to sleep, a bit overwhelmed from all the action and pain.
The other Joe then looked around for the sewer entrance nearby. He knew those grossologists would find them, and he'd be ready for a rematch.
While all this was happening, Lance Boil was watching from afar.
"And just think! This is the beginning!" Lance gloated. He was delighted to see such a grotesque sight.
People were limping, stalking, or running as they were being infected. The substance was spreading faster now as the virus seemingly came to life and slithered onto everyone.
It was disgusting. It was horrible. It was horrific. And Lance grinned as he watched everything on his monitors.
"Oh! This is the best plan ever. Soon I will create an army and send them across the world. Everything will be so...gross," He laughed, feeling confident of his victory. Until he saw Ty, Abby, and Danny on screen. "What are those nerdlings doing here!?"
His expression soured as he saw how the goop cannons were washing off the virus on everyone. The citizens screamed a bit as there were cleansed of the illness.
"What!? No!? How did they get a cure so fast!? It's not possible!"
The grossologists' new, improved goop cannons helped in containing the virus. A few shots and the virus was running off the folks. But it wasn't enough as the spread was faster than the cure.
"We need more," Danny commented.
Inside, the ghost boy was frustrated. Ty and Abby had a handle on things, but the ghost boy didn't grab a goop canon from the gaglab. He felt helpless right now as he watched his new friends fight off an infestation.
"I have to do something other than knock the bad guys away," He said as he tried to think fast.
Meanwhile, the two grossologists kept fighting the infestation
"Lab Rat! The goop cannons are helping, but we need more firepower! Please tell me you got something!" Ty screamed into the gagcom.
The gagologist popped up on the screen. His face was covered in grease and oil with a slime suit on.
"If you guys can handle things for a few minutes, I should have something ready. Just hold on," Lat Rat said before logging off.
"Hurry!..."Abby pleaded as they continued firing.
"You won't be hurrying for nothing," An annoying voice was heard.
The teens turned to see Lance Boil with his puss gun aimed at them. The tiny man had snuck out of his hiding to confront them personally.
"You think you can stop me!? Lance Boil! The greatest, grossest mind ever to roam the streets and the Bureau of Grossology!"
"Dude, you're sick, and not just in the gross way," Danny glared with charged fists.
"Oh, please. That's a compliment coming from you," Lance said with a smug grin as he charged his weapon.
The ghost boy glared at that before turning to his allies.
"So, what do you guys say we get one last stain," He said, and the female grossologist nodded.
"Let's pop this boil," Abby said as the group stared down at the short villain. It was time to end things.
Looks like things may be wrapping up, or are they? Things are about to get even messier. Stay tuned.
Special Thanks! to Flower Princess11 for all her help!
Reviews:
RonaldM40196867: Definitely.
Jay The Average Fanboy: Labrat did a quick scan of his DNA yes. He grabbed a hair sample after decontaminating Danny. Maybe. No clue. You'll have to ask Hermes himself.
Luiz4200: Superman is a comic book character in this world, yes. Danny just doesn't know his tropes.
Andrew Kynder Adams: Welcome and thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed this.