A/N: Sorry this chapter is shorter than the others! Thanks all for the kind reviews and follows/favorites, I always look forward to reading your reviews!
Arthur wasn't sure exactly when was the right time to tell Merlin about his intentions.
When he left Gwaine earlier, he went straight for Gaius' chambers, only to be informed Merlin wasn't there. He'd planned a hunt for the next day, but didn't really think that was a good time at all - he resolved he would wait until such a time as seemed appropriate made itself known to him.
Even without such a grand gesture, his and Merlin's relationship seemed to be naturally repairing itself somehow. He and Merlin exchanged an almost normal level of jabs and witty remarks throughout the day, neither feeling awkward or uncomfortable doing so. It just seemed that the two had gotten back to normalcy. Maybe not quite normal, but something like it. It almost made Arthur not want to go through with lifting the ban - just because of how he knew the people would react. He was never confident in his decisions as King anyway, but to pile on having to choose between the will of the people and the life of his friend, he felt like he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. The decision was clear; the execution of said decision was going to be beyond difficult.
Once all the knights made it to the courtyard and Merlin had ensured each necessary piece of equipment was prepared, they set off, on a smaller hunt than usual this time with only his most trusted Knights and, unironically, friends.
Merlin seemed exceptionally cheerful, which helped to calm some of the storm of doubt clouding Arthur's mind. It was instant - Merlin's bright smile was like a breath of clarity. What did Arthur care if it was difficult? He'd give anything to see that smile never disappear.
Merlin was often sullen and quiet during hunts, considering he disliked both the sport as a whole and the fact that it required riding a horse all day in the summer heat that was always a displeasure to all those subjected to it, but this time he seemed chatty and upbeat. Arthur could only imagine why, as it didn't seem much had changed, but enjoyed it while it lasted. The other knights seemed uplifted by Merlin's high spirits as well, and the hunt seemed to be rather pleasant.
They caught a fair amount of game much to Merlin's dismay, although it didn't seem to much change Merlin's demeanor nor his expression. Once they arrived back at the castle, Arthur decided for certain: he would speak to Merlin before he made any kind of strides towards lifting the ban, but would speak to him as soon as possible. The knights all went to take off their armor, and once Merlin had assisted Arthur with his, he took off toward's his home, where Gaius would likely be waiting with the newest potion ingredients.
Arthur hadn't seen Merlin for a few hours, and although he'd been delighted to see Merlin in high spirits earlier was getting irritated with his lack of punctuality. Gwaine offered to investigate, but he elected to go himself and tell the boy off. He'd likely gone to sleep, or something else equally lazy and whatever it was he didn't plan to afford Merlin particular leniency.
He first knocked on the door, noticing it was still open a crack, and when he heard no response shoved it open, expecting to see Merlin sleeping.
Instead, he saw a ghostly pale Merlin rocking on his knees on the floor.
His eyes looked blank, completely devoid of any emotion - it was unlike anything he'd ever seen before. He rushed quickly over to him, grabbing onto the boy's shoulders. He couldn't help but flinch a bit when he noticed how thin, how small Merlin looked. He could honestly understand why Merlin always looked so afraid during fights, he looked as though he'd barely weigh a feather.
"Merlin, a-are.. What happened?"
He didn't know quite what to do when Merlin didn't respond, just sat there, rocking back and forth, staring somewhere far off. It was like he was asleep, just with his eyes open.
Arthur stood up, surveying the room. He didn't really notice anything amiss; in fact it all looked particularly tidy. A small box sat on the table which he didn't open out of respect for Gaius' items, but he couldn't see what had happened.
Until he did.
Gaius looked almost as though he were sleeping, eyes shut, expression peaceful, blanket on. He couldn't tell if Merlin had done that or if that was how he was found, but he knew what happened as he watched Gaius' chest, waiting for a rise and fall to signify he was breathing that never came.
He let out a sigh, not of any emotion he could properly name. He stared at Merlin, the small figure hugging his knees, rocking back and forth on the ground, and sat down next to him. For a moment he just sat in silence, not even sure if Merlin registered his existence, before he hugged Merlin.
He couldn't remember a time he'd properly hugged him, maybe a quick pat on the shoulder but never a true hug. He waited for a tear, a sniffle, a scream, anything to show that Merlin was still there under the cloudy catatonic expression he wore, but it never came.
He couldn't remember how long it was by the time he moved Merlin over to his bed and waited for the other knights to come down and search for the two of them. Gwaine came down first, and upon seeing what Arthur had, went immediately into the room with Merlin, and smoothed back the young boy's hair rhythmically from his forehead until his empty expression disappeared into slumber.