NOTE: Let's discuss a few things before starting up.
1. Erza's fangirl crush was born of respect for Goku as a warrior. I just played it that way for my own amusement. She would never try to pursue a romantic relationship with the guy, because he's already married. Hell she has shown to support Goku and Chi-Chi's relationship this entire fic.
2. They will see Dragon Soul(Cell Saga Version). I won't tell you when.
3. Everyone in Fairy Tail loves muffins. Muffins are fucking awesome!
4. The FT Cast refer to Cell as an "It", because in the manga that's what everyone refers to Cell as.
That's pretty much it. Enjoy the chapter and Review!
Chapter 71: The "Perfect" Guy
(cut to the Hyperbolic Time Chamber with Goku carrying Gohan on his back)
GOKU: (singing to "Giant Woman")
All I wanna do is see you turn into a Super Saiyan, a Super Saiyan
All I want to be is a dad who gets to see a Super Saiyan (shows Goku and Gohan's training montage)
All I wanna do is see you turn into a Super Saiyan, a Super Saiyan
All I want to be is a dad who gets to see a Super Saiyan
Oh, I know that it'll be great, and I just can't wait! To see your hair golden, spiked and glowing
If you let out your rage, just break out of your cage! Because you are at least half Saiyan
Your power will rise like never before! Just tap into the power deep in your core
It's waiting for you, for you to turn into a Super Saiyan! A Super Saiyan
All I want to do is see you turn into a Super Saiyan
(Goku now places Gohan down on a bed and pulls a blanket over him)
"That song was so sweet!" Millianna meowed.
"He has a lot of faith in Gohan, doesn't he?" Gildarts smirks.
"A father always has faith in his children. Their true potential is always there, it's just a matter of helping them reach it," Makarov explained.
GOHAN: (breathing heavily and then wakes up) I'LL WRECK YOUR WHOLE WORL-
"And Gohan was just angry that entire time," Yukino sweatdropped.
"Anger helps me fight better," Natsu shrugged. Which was true, he defeated the majority of his enemies by getting extremely angry.
GOKU: Hey, son!
GOHAN: Were you...watching me sleep?
GOKU: Like a papa hawk! I don't wanna miss the moment you go Super Saiyan!
"Well, at least he's watching," Erza muttered.
"But, how is he supposed to go Super Saiyan in his sleep?" Happy wondered.
"There's always nightmares?" Wendy wasn't too sure about her own answer.
GOHAN: Wow, it's been nearly three months in here, and you still think I can do it?
"Of course you can do it! The other you did it, so it shouldn't be too hard for you," Lisanna said.
"Yeah! Only those with a MANLY drive can go Super Saiyan! And Gohan has the MANLIEST of drives!" Elfman shouted.
GOKU: Well, yeah! If you don't, the whole world will be doomed!
"No pressure there," Minerva muttered.
GOKU: Or not... Maybe I can handle it. So don't sweat it! And get some sleep, son!
"Of course you can handle it. You're Goku," Natsu said as if it was a fact.
GOHAN: Uh...yeah, okay.. (lays back on the bed and goes to sleep)
GOKU: (thinking) 'Cause tomorrow, I'ma get you Super Saiyan!
[OPENING SEQUENCE]
(cut to The Lookout)
PICCOLO: No, see, I'm definitely going with Krillin. Call it a safe bet, but I think his history speaks for itself.
"When was the last time Krillin choked under pressure?" Gray asked. He heard multiple gasps, getting ready to speak. "Nevermind don't answer that," Gray deadpanned.
TIEN: You haven't known him as long as I have. Sure, he can be a little... *sighs* Well, he's a total bitch.
"So we're finally admitting it?" Gajeel asked.
TIEN: But when we really need him, he's always stepped up. Vegeta, on the other hand…
"That's true. Even though he gets scared, Krillin always manages to step up in some sort of way. He may not be the strongest, but his heart tends to be in the right place," Lucy said.
BULMA: Hey, uh, what are you two talking about?
PICCOLO: Oh, we're just making a bet to see who screws this up.
"Oh Vegeta already has," Minerva said.
"Cell hasn't reached its Perfect Form, so he technically hasn't failed yet," Kagura countered.
"Are you seriously defending Vegeta?"
"No, I'm just saying that he hasn't truly screwed up yet. Though that completely depends on what Trunks and Krillin do next," Kagura answered.
"And considering how conflicted Krillin is on the matter of 18. Everything is riding on Trunks' shoulder at the moment," Erza added.
TIEN: See, he's betting on Krillin, but I'm betting on Vegeta...
BULMA: Oh... I'll get in on that action.
PICCOLO: Okay, Vegeta or Krillin?
BULMA: Both.
Everyone had a brief moment of silence at Bulma's answer.
"You know...that's a huge possibility," Levy said.
PICCOLO: Wow.
TIEN: Damn.
BULMA: *laughs* Please, I've been in this longer than the both of you. Although, if I had to pick who's gonna screw up first...
(cut to Krillin, who's feeling skeptical about shutting down Android 18)
"Oh Krillin…" Lucy mumbled.
TRUNKS: (in the background) ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…
"He's still screaming no," Levy noticed.
KRILLIN: (thinking) Okay Krillin, pull yourself together... She's right over there, standing there like a...mechanical angel.(Juvia could be heard squealing.) And all I have to do is push this button and...watch her explode...everywhere. Little bit of blonde hair here...her blue eyes there...and then it's done.
"As much as I want to give Krillin slack, this isn't a situation that I'd want to be in," Gajeel said. He didn't know what he'd do if he was forced to have to kill Levy.
Both Gray and Juvia thought back to their fight with Invel. The Ice-Mage remembered the emotions that ran through him when he thought that Juvia had killed herself for his sake. He really sympathized with Krillin here, losing someone that you love. He looked down at Juvia who had small tears building up in the corners of her eyes. "Maybe...maybe I should…" Gray shook his head, saving that thought for later.
KRILLIN: I-I mean, she probably won't even feel it, or even know what happened, just her life...ended in an instant...by me...with no DragonBalls to wish her back when Cell dies... Oh, come on, Krillin! Be strong for one second in your worthless life, and push the stupid button! IF YOU DON'T, EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND LOVE IS GOING TO DIE! INCLUDING HER! (realizes what he had just thought and slowly drops the detonator) Oh…
Everyone who has been watching Krillin from the Saiyan Saga to now were shocked by Krillin's proclamation and admittance of his love for 18. Usually there'd be a sarcastic remark to make about Krillin not having the balls to go through with something, but there was only silence within the guild.
(shift over to Vegeta and Trunks)
TRUNKS: ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
VEGETA: Quiet, boy! (Trunks shuts up) Now, continue.
CELL: Thank you. You see, my dear prince...
VEGETA: Don't push it.
"You're pushing it," Laxus glared.
CELL: Uh, you see, Vegeta, this is only my second form. I am merely Semi-Perfect.
VEGETA: Wait, how can you be Semi-Perfect? You're either perfect or you're not me-there's no gray area.
"And if you thought that the Prince of all Assholes couldn't get any more full of himself…" Minerva spat.
CELL: My point is that this form was achieved by absorbing my brother, Android 17. And the only way I may obtain true perfection...
VEGETA: Is to absorb the bitch. So, in summation, you get the Android, and I get a proper challenge!
"Is a proper challenge really worth the risk of the entire planet!? If you want a challenge then just fight Goku, but don't risk the lives of other people for your own selfish desires!" Jellal shouted.
CELL: Oh, I promise you, Vegeta, you're going to get everything that's coming to you.
"Well, that's not ominous," Gajeel muttered.
VEGETA: Oh ho ho! Ominous!
(cut to the Androids listening to Vegeta and Cell's conversation)
ANDROID 18: He wouldn't...! 16, he wouldn't, would he?!
"Considering the fact that you broke both his arms, humiliated him, and he's a selfish prick? Yeah, he is definitely going to do this," Gray answered.
ANDROID 16: Wouldn't you?
ANDROID 18/Everyone: No!
ANDROID 16: ...I'm sorry, what are we talking about again?
"Oh 16," Wendy mumbled.
KRILLIN: (off-screen to the Androids) Hey! (Androids 16 and 18 look over at Krillin)
ANDROID 18: (thinking) Whoa, it's the cute one.
"She really does find him cute!" Juvia squealed.
"At least it wasn't a one sided thing," Meredy told her water friend.
ANDROID 18: Was he hiding there? Wait, what's that on the gro-? (sees the detonator on the ground) (out loud) Oh, my God.
"Realizing that she was that close to dying in two different ways," Lily said.
KRILLIN: Uh, hi...
ANDROID 18: Uh, hey...
KRILLIN: Look, I just... Can I ask something of you?
Juvia and Meredy both held their breaths, expecting Krillin to confess.
ANDROID 18: S-Sure?
KRILLIN: (stammers) Please don't kill anyone!
Both of the women felt a bit disappointed from Krillin not confessing.
"Well, that's alright. I guess," Meredy chuckled.
ANDROID 18: Wait, are you-?
ANDROID 16: No deal!
ANDROID 18/Wendy: 16!
ANDROID 16: Son Goku is a person! Therefore, he is part of "anyone"! Therefore, no deal!
"Come on, 16! Just this once!" Wendy pleaded.
"Yeah, the fate of the world is at stake!" Happy shouted.
"You won't be able to kill Goku if Cell kills everyone!" Millianna shouted.
ANDROID 18: 16, calm down! I will get you a Goku!
ANDROID 16: Do you promise?
ANDROID 18: Yes!
ANDROID 16: ...Proceed.
Multiple sighs of relief were heard.
ANDROID 18: Okay! Now listen, we weren't planning on killing anyone!
ANDROID 16: Except Goku!
ANDROID 18: We haven't even killed anyone thus far! In fact, the only thing we want dead right now is Cell!
"She's correct by the way. The only bad thing they've done is stealing vehicles, burning down a forest, ransacking Goku's home, kicking all of your asses, and destroying country music. Other than all of those things they are completely innocent," Levy listed off.
ANDROID 16: Also Goku!
KRILLIN: Oh... Thank God, that makes this so much easier! (destroys the detonator with his foot)
"HE CHOSE LOVE!" Juvia jumped out of her seat, taking both Meredy and Gray with her. The rest of the guild weren't sure how to feel exactly.
"On one hand Cell can still absorb 18, but on the other hand I can't stay angry at Krillin," Erza said.
"Krillin followed his heart and his heart believed this was the right choice. It's all up to Trunks now to stop Cell," Lucy said.
(cut to The Lookout)
PICCOLO: Ha! And you owe me some zeni!
TIEN: Oh, no...
BULMA: All right, what did Krillin do?
PICCOLO/Gajeel: He crushed the remote.
TIEN: He did WHAT?!
BULMA: That was twenty hours of my life! That dick!
"He chose LOVE! KRILLIN DID NOTHING WRONG!" Juvia roared.
PICCOLO: And possibly the rest of it if Vegeta follows suit…
"Oh he will follow suit. Trust me," Minerva said.
TIEN: I don't understand! All he had to do was push the button and blow up the...the girl.
BULMA: Oh, that makes sense.
"If it was 17, then we'd probably wouldn't be in this situation," Rogue guessed.
PICCOLO: I don't get it.
TIEN: He really did it... He actually risked every life on the planet just for...for cyber sex! I didn't Kikohou myself half to death so he could get LAID!
"If you look at it like that. Then yes, what Krillin did was stupid," Levy winced.
"If Krillin had killed her, I don't think I'd have been able to forgive him. Destroying the remote was the right decision," Natsu explained his view.
"I agree, Natsu. What's the point of living if it means hurting the people you love," Lucy smiled at him.
"Hehe! Right on, Lucy!"
PICCOLO: Oh... Gross.
"Because you don't have a penis," Gildarts and Cana said simultaneously.
(cut to Krillin and Android 18)
ANDROID 18: Oh... Oh, wow. Well, I mean, that was really sweet and all, but...maybe you should have kept that around.
KRILLIN: What? Why?
"Because Vegeta," Laxus answered.
(shift over to Vegeta and Cell)
CELL: Vegeta, this is the only chance you're going to get! If she slips away now, you'll never get the opportunity to fight me at my full potential. And let's be honest, do you really think Goku can give you the challenge you deserve?
VEGETA: You know, the funny thing is, I know you're playin' me... But you're right. She's all yours!
"TRUNKS DO SOMETHING!"
CELL: Oh, thank you, Vegeta! Trust me...great things are about to happen!
"More like a nightmare," Makarov growled.
(cut to The Lookout)
PICCOLO: Oh, no...! Goddamn him!
BULMA: Okay, now what did Vegeta do?
PICCOLO: He's letting Cell absorb 18!
TIEN: Well, looks like nobody wins…
"Bulma wins," Levy replied.
BULMA: Well, I technically do. (in a singsong tone) You guys owe me zeni..
PICCOLO: CELL IS GOING TO KILL US ALL!
"Not if Trunks stops Cell!" Mira hoped.
(there's a short pause and then baby Trunks begins to cry)
MR. POPO: Geez, bring down the whole mood, why don't you?
(cut back to the battlefield with Cell flying away from Vegeta)
VEGETA: Make it snappy! The boy's gotta be in bed by seven or he gets cranky!
(as Cell takes to the sky, his path gets blocked by Trunks, now in his Super Saiyan form)
TRUNKS: Yeah, so, I'm gonna be the only voice of reason here and say ABSOLUTELY NOT!
"FINALLY!" Everyone felt relieved to see Trunks finally intervene.
TRUNKS: (Cell growls) Don't you get it?! He's just been feeding you everything you want to hear! He's playing you!
"Your Dad is aware. He's just too full of himself," Erza said.
CELL: To be fair, I haven't lied since I got here.
"That...is also true," Sting said.
TRUNKS: You're not involved in this anymore!
CELL: I'm feeling pretty involved...
VEGETA: Boy, don't make me come up there and be a parent!
"First time you've bothered to care," Laxus spat.
TRUNKS: First time for everything!
VEGETA: Oh ho ho!
CELL: Wow Vegeta, are you just gonna stand there and take the- (stops talking as he looks down to the ground and starts groaning)
TRUNKS: (thinking) Huh? Why is he doing that-? (looks at the direction Cell is looking and spots the Androids) Oh... Oh, no... (sees Krillin) W-wait, but there's Krillin! Does he have the- (sees the smashed detonator) No...! But why?! He... Why?! But, the Android! Krillin... Crushed remote! But...could turn...perfect! Crushed! Why?! Krill-? But...twenty hours! (out loud at the top of his lungs, catching Krillin and the Androids' attention) WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!
"Future Bulma has filled this boy's head with stories of these people. Telling him how great and heroic they all are. When the boy finally gets to meet the legends of those stories he is left standing shocked by how incompetant and dysfunctional each and everyone of them are," Makarov explained.
"Never meet your heroes, kids. Because heroes are people and people are shit," Laxus said.
KRILLIN: Oh, hey! It's Trunks!
"RUN AWAY!"
(Cell makes a break for 18, causing Krillin to scream)
TRUNKS: I said ABSOLUTELY NOT! (intercepts Cell and kicks him)
CELL: (thinking) Huh... Vegeta was right! He is almost as strong as- (gets hit by Trunks again and flies down into the ground)
"Which means he can very much kick your ass," Bickslow laughed.
VEGETA: Look, if this is about getting your own turn in, just wait until I'm done with him!
"Turns don't matter at this point anymore! Just kill Cell!" Lucy shouted.
TRUNKS: Just ignore him. Krillin, get the Androids out of here now!
KRILLIN: Don't need to tell me twice! Or at all, actually. Let's go!
ANDROID 18: Right! 16, let's move!
ANDROID 16: But I just got comfortable.
ANDROID 18/Wendy: 16!
ANDROID 16: More importantly, Cell is only after you. I will slow you down. Now, go!
"You aren't a liability to me, 16," Wendy said, sorrow in her voice.
ANDROID 18: Fine, but I'm coming back for you! (turns around and runs off)
KRILLIN: (approaches 16) You're doing a brave thing.
ANDROID 16: As are you. (Krillin runs off after 18) You are way out of your league, tiny duck.
"Nope! Krillin totally got the girl!" Juvia smirked.
KRILLIN: So, hey, I know this isn't the best time, but, um, are, uh, you seeing anyone right now? (an explosion erupts ahead, knocking him and 18 back)
CELL: (emerging from underground) She is…
"Not you!" Juvia cried out.
TRUNKS: There you are! (powers up and charges towards Cell)
CELL: Vegeta, Trunks is picking on me!
VEGETA: Learn to share, brat! (kicks Trunks into a plateau)
"WHY ARE YOU HELPING IT!?"
CELL: That's better. Now, 18, I'm not sure I like you hanging around with other men. Or, in this case...half of one.
"Still making short jokes, huh?" Makarov sweatdropped. Levy also fumed at the short joke.
KRILLIN: Oh, yeah, another short joke. Yeah, sure, fine.
ANDROID 16: How about you leave the girl alone? (stands in front of Krillin and 18)
CELL: Come on, 16, don't be so jealous. This is meant to be, and she knows it. Just look at what she's wearing... She's practically asking to be absorbed!
"Prick!" Kagura cursed.
KRILLIN: Okay, that line has been crossed! You wanna go, big guy? LET'S GO-! (springs forward to attack Cell, only to get tail-whipped into a wall) (Krillin Owned Count: 33)
"He tried. He should get points for trying," Evergreen sighed.
CELL: Oh, no, who would have seen that coming? Anyway- (gets hit in the head by 16's fist) ...Really? (16 starts punching Cell repeatedly) Oh, you precious little cinnamon bun. Never change? (elbows 16 down to the ground and then 18 comes after him) (thinking) A oney and a twoey and a you-know-what-to-doey! (blasts 18, knocking her at a cliffside)
"Let me at Cell! I'll kick it's ass!" Natsu was held back by Macao and Wakaba from charging at the Lacrama again.
(Trunks emerges from the ground and powers up)
TRUNKS: That is it! I am stopping this now!
VEGETA: Oh, what are ya doing?
TRUNKS: What am I doing?!
VEGETA: Thwartin' my plans?
TRUNKS: Thwarting your plans?!
VEGETA: Are you?!
TRUNKS: ...You know what?! YES! (fires a massive blast at Vegeta, who screams as he gets carried into the sky, disappearing with a twinkle)
The mages cheered at Trunks finally having enough of his father's bullshit and standing up to the man.
"And that gag made a return!" Levy clapped her hands.
KRILLIN: (sits up from under a pile of rubble) (thinking) Oh, God... If I had a nose, I'm pretty sure it'd be broken. (sees Cell approaching 18) (out loud) Ah! Oh, no... You leave her alone, or I swear I'll...
ANDROID 16: No, little duckling! It is not your time!
"Yeah, Trunks is on his way! It'll be fine!" Wendy shouted.
(Cell starts humming as he approaches 18 and opens the funnel of his tail. As Android 18 looks in utter shock and fear, Cell starts laughing.)
TRUNKS: FUTURE KICK!
CELL: Wha-? (gets knocked away by a kicked in the face from Trunks)
"YEAH, TRUNKS!"
TRUNKS: (stops in front of 18) BLOW YOURSELF UP OR LEAVE; I DON'T CARE WHICH! (takes off after Cell)
"Tien said the same thing to her a bit ago," Levy mentioned.
ANDROID 18: ...Yeah, okay.
CELL: I hope you know, this means war-! (gets repeatedly punched in the face by Trunks)
"Garlic Jr. said the same thing when Kami knocked him under rubble," Levy remembered.
CELL: Where's Vegeta? (Trunks kicks him in the face)
"Sent flying by his future son," Gajeel answered.
(18 runs over to 16 and puts his arm around her shoulders to carry him off)
ANDROID 18: Come on, 16, move it!
ANDROID 16: Why...are you...still here?
ANDROID 18: It's like 17 said, remember? The three amigos? Well, I guess more like...dos compadres, now…
"That's sad. I am sad now," Happy curled into Lucy's side.
KRILLIN: (reaches his hand out to 18) Here, uh, allow me. I might not be good for much, but I can lift!
ANDROID 18: (thinking) ...If we make it through this, I am going to rock his four-foot world.
Jaws dropped from 18's proclamation, all while Juvia and Meredy were dancing hand in hand. Both of them chanted about love.
(cut to Vegeta floating on the surface of the ocean)
VEGETA: Huh. This is a new feeling...pride in someone else.
"Did he knock some sense into your ass?" Laxus asked.
VEGETA: (wipes his face with his glove and sees he's bleeding) Unfortunately, it's overshadowed by all this UNYIELDING RAGE! (shoots out of the water)
"Nope, still the same old angry Prince," Laxus said.
(shift to Trunks pulverizing Cell and then kicks him away)
CELL: (thinking) Okay, THIS obviously isn't working! (sees Krillin, 16 and 18 preparing to make their escape and then looks at the sun) Wait, Tenshinhan got me into this... And now, he's going to get me out! (starts flying downward)
"What's it planning now!?" Yukino cried.
TRUNKS: Uh, hey! (chases after Cell)
(Cell flies in front of the sun)
"Oh no! EVERYONE COVER YOUR EYES!"
CELL: I've been so close for so long...and I can't take it anymore! 18, I'm coming! (Vegeta is seen flying back to the battle, growling) SOLAR FLARE! (blinds everyone)
Thanks to being extra prepared this time, everyone managed to avoid getting blinded by the Solar Flare.
VEGETA: (thinking as he gets blinded) AH, MY RAGE HAS BLINDED ME!
"Pfft!" Millianna snorted.
CELL: (flies down to the ground, passing a blinded Trunks) Now...for the climax!
KRILLIN: (runs in front of the Androids, acting as a shield) I won't let him touch you! Just stay behind m- (gets sent flying by a blast from Cell) GAAH! (Krillin Owned Count: 34)
(18 shrieks and turns around as Cell approaches her and opens the funnel of his tail)
"Nononononononononononono!"
ANDROID 18: 16!
ANDROID 16: Yes?
ANDROID 18: ...Look after the little guy.
ANDROID 16: ...Confirmed.
(18 dashes forward, only for Cell's tail to drop down and let out a terrified scream. Trunks lands on the ground, regaining his eyesight and sees Cell undergoing his final transformation.)
The mages watch in horror as Cell begins to transform, their worst fears bearing fruit once more.
TRUNKS: (thinking) NO!
ANDROID 16: (thinking) NO!
KRILLIN: (thinking) NO!
VEGETA: (thinking) YES!
"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"
(Cell lets out an enormous shockwave that can be seen from the island)
The large Lacrama began to shake roughly, before emitting a powerful shockwave that knocked most of the mages out of their seats. An enormous gust of wind burst forward, but Wendy regained her senses quick enough to reel the wind in.
"WHAT'S HAPPENING!?" Lucy cried out, holding onto Natsu.
"We're fucked…" Laxus answered.
(cut to The Lookout)
BULMA: Hey, so, I can't sense power levels, but I can feel THAT! Does that mean anything?
PICCOLO: WE'RE F**KED!
(back at the battlefield, Cell completes his Perfect form as everyone minus Vegeta looks in shock)
PERFECT CELL: (lands on the ground and looks up in the sky)
"P" is for "priceless", the look upon your faces
"E" is for "extinction", all your puny races
"R" for "revolution", which will be televised
"F" is for how "f**ked" you are, now allow me to repriiise
"E" is for "eccentric", just listen to my song
"C" is for "completion", that I waited for so long
"T" is for the "terror", upon you I'll bestow
(chuckles) My name is Perfect Cell, and I'd like to say...hello
Something was different, entirely different. Cell's entire demeanor no longer screamed creepy or freaky. There was nothing, but a chill that entered the guild. Everyone felt that chill of overwhelming hopelessness that the Fairy Tail mages had only experienced once before.
The chill of death created by Acnologia on Tenrou Island absolutely paled in comparison to Cell's endless stream of death. A God of Destruction has been born into the world.
[DBZA ALTERNATE SCENE- "...WHOOPS..."]
ANDROID 18: We haven't even killed anyone thus far! In fact, the only thing we want dead right now is Cell!
ANDROID 16: Also Goku!
KRILLIN: Oh... Thank God, that makes this so much easier! (accidentally hits the button of the detonator with his foot)
ANDROID 18: Huh? (her head explodes)
KRILLIN: AAH!
(I hate this awkward deleted scene. Ruins the atmosphere. But, people would've complained about me leaving it out.)
Chapter End
NOTE: In the original broadcast of Dragon Ball Z, Cell was called a God of Destruction in the episode title in the Japanese version.