I suppose keeping a 1.5-2k word count per chapter is alright. I was worrying this was short.

I mean, it is, but I can read a 100,000+ word thing in about a day, so it might just be me. And I'm not going to start posting wordcounts. That's cheating, and this isn't that much of a vanity fair.

2x faster brain, FTW.

On the topic of my questionable mental structure, I took the Mary Sue Litmus Test for Aqua, and she came in at probably a six or seven without the point subtractors at the end. With them she's a one. Which means I need to work on my character development or that test doesn't take my (and by extension, Aqua's) psyche into account for Sueism.

Please tell me if my character development sucks/I'm writing Aqua as a Mary Sue. I'm insecure enough about the characters as is.

Also, I came up with a mental image of Aqua being crushed under a wave of shipgirls, and had to share.

The Review Box:

Fid99: Uh, whoops.

And thank you, thank you.

AmythestPone (review and PM reply): ...Which one?

... Maybe jumped the gun on 'Past Me' shipping (how do you ship- wait, I've seen it.). I can say that I'm rather sure I'm not shipping anyone with their past self. Hopefully.

Thanks to AmythestPone and Captiosus for the follow.

Jawsome VS KH3: So I did something I wouldn't normally do and bought a game day one. It is Kingdom Hearts 3, which had fifty fuckin' years of dev time between the fifteen thousand remakes, Birth by Sleep (still need to play that) and 3D, and I worked for it, dammit. This commentary was actually written after this chapter was already done. I just moved it and the other KH commentary here because I wanted to share.

(Day 2) So far, been enjoying KH3. It's… somewhat predictable, and my Sora, Donald, Goofy counter crashed midway through the Toy Story world (mostly because I stopped caring), but the game controls nice once you learn them (curse you Automata for spoiling me on controller customization(fuck the coliseums in that game)). Story is… well, as expected. I honestly think Nomura is just writing as he goes. At least it's not retellings of the movies every time. So far Corona has been, and Arendelle is looking like it, unlike Olympus and Toy Box. They also nerfed Twilight Town- there's only the tram common, some underground (a new section at least), the forest and the mansion. And you only go in in a cutscene.

(Day 6) HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

MY HEAD.

WHAT EVEN.

NOMURA, Y U DO DIS.

We now return to your regularly scheduled shipgirls.

And the schedule is far worse for me than it is for you.

Journal of Admiral Steele, January 8, 2558

It's Monday. Fun stops here, and there's no going back.

And I've run out of ways to describe my caffeine addiction, so enough of that.

This morning I dropped in on the R&D division as I was referring to it as. So far the repair and research ships had been quiet, which either meant they had nothing to do, or were up to something.

Neither sounded good.

"Admiral." Luna saluted me as I entered, standing next to a desk piled with paper and scrap metal. I nodded as I walked over to her to figure out what the hell was going on. The paper was full of scribbles that went way over my head. Something about... the coefficient of electricity? Maybe?

"So, what have you been up to? And I see you've dropped the 'hot scientist' act." I said, picking up a piece of paper with what looked like a force/distance equation on it. The research ship took it from me with a slight scowl and set it back, then picked up a small square.

"I know when to be serious. And this is rather serious. We- Akashi, Aether, and I- have been probing the firepower differential between shipgirls with natural UNSC weaponry and updated weaponry." Luna began. "In that, we began to theorize about alternative forms of assault, like MACs and whatnot, but what we have here is quite possibly the best of all. Call in a battleship for me, will you?"

"You rang, Admiral?" Texas asked after her salute.

"C'mere." Luna walked around behind the battleship, took hold of her belt, and slapped the square on it, where it lit up with a green indicator.

"Hey! Watch the merchandise." Texas grumbled, looking down at her new belt accessory.

"So far the only thing I've seen that used for is to slap a girl's ass." I deadpanned. Granted, the battleship did have a nice one, but still.

"That's because it's interfacing with her weapons systems." Luna retorted, picking up a tablet and tapping a few times. A large target rose up on the opposite end of the room. "Run testfirev4. EXE aiming at that target." She directed Texas, who shrugged, manifested her guns, and aimed.

Suddenly, a beam of blue light fired out of one of her battery guns, dead on target. Texas was knocked onto her ass as the target gained a black spot where the goddamn laser beam had hit it. Luna pumped her fist in victory. I think I feel a grin on my face.

"I love it." I declared in no uncertain terms from where I was leaning against the desk. "I don't care if it's just a Splaser program, I love it."

"Damn straight! Thing kicks like an angry longhorn, but it's e-ffective!" Texas said as she stood up. She then turned to Luna with- her eyes are actually shining, okay. "Can I keep it?"

"Of course." Luna smirked. "It was kinda a first-come first-serve type deal. Provide data about it on combat missions and we can roll it out to the rest of the battleships and even upgrade it too." She was then tackled by a happy battleship that was saying 'thank you' so fast it was blurring together.

After a good laugh at the situation, I dismissed Texas to go about her business (which I expected would include bragging to the other battleships and then a deluge of requests for a laser. Which I would dump on Luna's desk and forget about), and helped the research ship off the floor.

Unfortunately, there wasn't anything quite as spectacular as what they had called the 'Shipgirl Laser' (creative, although the original Spartan Laser was also rather uncreative with it's name). Just bits, pieces, and proofs of concept. I told them to keep at it.

Next on the list… 1000 hours…

Ah yes, shooty time.

One in the chamber… pump… five in the tube… aim… brace…

*BLAM!*

My shotgun barked as double-aught buck tore into a target. I pumped, and fired again, dropping the target and another shell to the floor. I emptied the tube and dropped two more targets, then loaded six SLUG (Shotgun Loaded Uranium Group) rounds. Each pretty little explosion blew apart a target, which repaired back soon enough. Then I loaded six Whiplash slug rounds. Sighting targets further downrange, I fired. Once I had emptied the tube, I took it over to a bench for some cleaning, idly observing the shells be cleaned by the automated disposal as I snapped the action open. As I began to work, a battlecruiser -Hood- walked in, set up her range and summoned her guns, opening fire. I idly watched the pride of the old British Navy work, noting how she grimaced slightly when she missed, or winced sometimes when she hit a target on the top and bottom. Bracketing, I idly recalled, left an old ship dead in the water. But it was when a round punched through where a target's heart would be that she suddenly lost all color, her guns disappearing, as she began to shake uncontrollably.

Wait… wasn't that…

I wrapped my arms around her, studiously ignoring the fact that she could crush any bone in my body if she retaliated, trying to get her out of whatever the hell had just come over her. She was shaking, muttering over and over something about a pink explosion, weak deck armor, her Admiral going down, into the darkness.

"Hood." I said. "Hood!" I began to repeat myself until she finally stopped. She was staring at me now, fear in her watery eyes. "It's fine. You're here now." I said. "It's gonna be fine."

"But Admiral…" She muttered, looking at the ground in misery. "What if you die too?" I laughed.

"I can't really go down with you if I can't actually go with you." I said. "Besides, I survived the Covenant War. If I can live through that, I can live through anything."

"Right…" She then began to mutter to herself, speaking so fast I couldn't make out anything she was saying. She then snapped her fingers into pointing up, like she'd had an idea. "But if the Abyssals come here, you might die! So I'll be your bodyguard!"

I graced her with a particularly flat look. "I'm an ODST. I don't really need a bodyguard." I deadpanned. Hood began to violently shake her head, so much that I put a hand on it so she wouldn't give herself whiplash.

Shipgirls can get whiplash, right?

"Yeah, but these Abyssals are different aliens! So I'm gonna keep you safe from them!" Oh, god, that's obsession I hear. If I'm not careful, she'll lock me in a room somewhere.

Very, very carefully, I considered my words. "Fine. You can be my bodyguard." Her eyes lit up, but I raised my hand. "But only when we're on base, and you can't deny anyone from seeing me. That's Ooyodo's job, and no you can't have it. Also, no threatening the other shipgirls, capiche?" She started nodding really fast. So I replaced my hand. She was giving me the shiny eyes beneath her messed up hair, and inwardly I hoped I hadn't made a mistake.

"You can count on me, Admiral!" She saluted, before ducking out of my grip and running off to the armory. I stood there, slowly turned around, and de-assed the area.

Vodka sounds like a good thing to try right now. I think I'll hit up Hibiki for some.

A disturbingly large bottle of pure COMЯADE-grade vodka was now sitting on my desk. I had been drinking it as I went through mission targets, and had selected one a third of the way through the bottle. Of course, I was suspecting I had drank a little too much earlier in life, since even that was only giving me a slight buzz.

Today's target would be a permanent installation, on a asteroid in Subsector Alpha. Orders were destroy as necessary, danger close. I casually mentioned to R&D that it would be nice if Texas's Wave Motion Gun (I am not calling it a Shipgirl Laser) could be improved and replicated. I think they responded by calling it a Shipgirl Laser, and yes, which led to an argument over naming conventions before compromising and naming it the Particle Accelerator.

Somewhat better, but I digress.

Texas has been designated flagship for this operation, since she has the aforementioned Particle Accelerator. I'm also deploying Akashi for field repairs, with orders for her to stay out of the fight, and the Ashford class to look after her. She has no combat weapons, so she's basically a sitting duck if she gets caught up in the Rap- combat. As a test to her wanting to do this body guard job, I told Hood that, under no uncertain terms, she was going, and to leave the DMR behind. She nodded, put it down, and lifted off with the rest of the fleet, though I caught her glancing back at me as they headed out into the sector.

That done, I returned to my bottle.

I sat in my office, absently reading something on my terminal. Then fell asleep in my chair, snoring rather loudly according to what Ooyodo told me later, and quite unladylike.

She didn't really understand why I walked off laughing my ass off from that comment.

I then woke up later, to the sound of my door opening and something being tossed onto my chest. Something heavy.

I looked down. A small girl with tentacles sprouting from her back looked back up at me in petulance, sticking her lower lip out and pouting.

I looked up. Texas, Hood, Bismarck, Kongo, and Yamato were standing in front of my desk, each of them sporting disturbingly wide and eager grins. Glancing back down, I noticed the distinct smudge marks of shipgirl round impacts, and even a smear, probably from the Particle Accelerator, all over the Abyssal.

Sighing, I reached for the vodka bottle again.

The Rant

No, I am not naming the Wave Motion Gun the Shipgirl Laser. I hold myself to a higher creative standard than that. *Quietly hides clipboard of copy/pastes*

Off topic, somewhat, but why does reality TV have writers? It's supposed to be actual events, that shit ain't scripted. Usually. *cough cough 2018 nfl cough*

And why doesn't FanFiction let me write a . EXE correctly?

One of the things KanColle does is make you want to learn naval history, and there's some interesting stuff to learn. One of the things Halo does is make you want to learn it's lore (which has an EU that wasn't retconned into nonexistence, looking at you, Disney), and there's also interesting shit to learn there.

For example: A Standard MAC fires 600 ton slugs of ferric tungsten/depleted uranium at 4% the speed of light. The speed of light in a vacuum is 299,792,458 m/s. 4% of this is 11,991,698.32 m/s (which is VERY VERY fast). If the weight of 600 tons is correct (544311kg), then the kinetic energy of one of these pieces of metal (Using E = (m * v2 ) /2 ) is 3.91 x 1019 Joules. This is equivalent to 9362 Megatons of TNT, or 187 TSAR Bomba Nukes. So if this hit anything, it would vaporize it.

The wonders of fiction.

Also, I retook the Sue test with more up-to-date answers (I.e., based on chapters I have written at the time of posting) and got an 8. Which means Aqua has a very low chance of being a Sue.

Yay?... My luck is absolute shit, so now I'm just gonna be even more paranoid.