Chapter 45

Severus was pleasantly surprised on Thursday when Harry dropped by his office that evening. Having the boy stay in his quarters for a few days had proved unexpectedly not awful. As teenage boys went, Harry was relatively quiet and shockingly tidy and had ended up being reasonably good company. They played chess and talked, but Harry was also happy to read silently in his armchair.

Severus had been worried that Harry's return to his dorms would entirely end their friendly conversations and that the young Gryffindor would only speak to him in class or their mandatory catch-up meetings. He postulated that the boy might have a topic in mind but presumed that if it was something urgent then Harry would have just come to him straight away.

They hadn't agreed a time, but Severus had told him he would be in his office after dinner and not long after he had begun lesson planning, a knock on the door indicated Harry's arrival. He called the Gryffindor in, marveling, as he often did, at how grown the boy was. He seemed, not just taller, but broader in the shoulders. The figure of a man instead of that of a child. Severus gestured him into a seat and poured him hot Moroccan mint tea.

"Thanks." Harry blew on the steaming liquid before sipping it gratefully.

"How has your week been?" Severus asked. It was a question he often started his meetings with, since it opened up the conversation and was a good way to tune in to the mood of each student. This evening, however, he asked without motive, only genuine interest and care, a difference Harry heard in the man's tone.

"Good." He answered, honestly. "I can't believe how much of a relief it is just to know that the Death Eaters are all taken care of. I didn't realise how much it weighed on me."

Severus nodded. No matter how much he might have told Harry that the Death Eaters were not his job to deal with, he knew the young hero had felt the responsibility regardless. "A closure for you, perhaps?"

"Yeah, I guess." Harry's face said that he was pondering on how that felt. "What about you? Have your classes been alright?"

Severus hummed. "Only one injury in fourth year dueling, but we have moved on to silent casting with the sixth years, which can be…challenging."

Harry grimaced. He recalled his own first lesson on wordless spells with Snape and it had not been a particularly pleasant experience for either of them. Harry could at least think of a few 6th Years who could already cast a few things wordlessly, since it was one of the things they practiced fairly regularly with the DA. He didn't say that, however, since their organization was still a sort of secret and he wasn't totally sure of what Snape's opinion on a secret dueling club would be.

"Better than exploding potions, I suppose?"

A small smile tugged at the corner of Severus' mouth. "There is that."

A gentle silence fell between them and Severus waited it out, assuming, correctly, that Harry had something he wanted to broach.

"I need to talk to you about something." Harry began cautiously.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, do you remember what I said about the Death Eater attack? How I…sensed something and just knew something was up?"

"I recall."

"When we talked about it, you thought maybe I had just noticed their unusual behaviour subconsciously and that alerted my suspicions. But I think – I know that isn't what it was."

"Why do you say that?" Severus said warily.

Harry scratched the back of his neck. "Because I've been feeling the same feeling…"

Harry assessed Severus' expression as he absorbed this news. The man seemed calm but he had definitely grown serious. More serious than usual. "When?"

"Er, it comes and goes."

"When did it reoccur for the first time?"

"I noticed it when I was in the Hospital Wing."

The Professor's eyes narrowed and his lips thinned. "So it has taken you nearly two weeks to inform me that you are sensing potentially dangerous magic, a sign that previously precluded a deathly attack."

"In my defence, I told you about it before and you didn't think it was anything."

Severus glared for another moment before sighing heavily. "Harry, I would have listened to you if you came to me again."

"I know, but I wasn't even feeling it all the time and then when I went back to the 8th year dorms, it seemed to bother me even less."

"But you are still experiencing it?" Harry nodded. "Describe it to me."

"It's sort of slimy feeling. Definitely dark. It makes me feel nauseated, but it's also sort of…familiar?"

"Familiar."

"Yeah, so that's why I wanted to talk to you." Harry said, noticeably nervous. "I think I know what it is."

The dark eyebrows dropped further. "Go on."

"It's the Dark Mark."

The little colour he had, swiftly left Severus' face. "Excuse me?"

"The Dark Mark." Harry repeated. "Or people who have it."

"Harry…" Severus' voice was strained. "Voldemort is gone."

"I know, I'm not saying he's back, I'm saying I can sense when his followers are around because of the Dark Mark."

"And you have concluded this because…?"

Harry paused before he admitted quietly, "Because I feel it when I'm around you."

Severus looked pained.

"That's why it felt familiar. It reminded me of you, of the magic I sensed from you."

Another long pause while Severus processed. "That's a bit of a jump, Harry," he reasoned.

"I feel it around Draco too." Harry said softly. "There's only one thing I can think of that links you, Draco and those idiots that attacked me."

Severus had to acknowledge the connection. "Your reasoning is sound, but the Dark Marks have been inactive since Voldemort's demise. It is more faded than I have ever known it and I feel nothing from it now."

"I can see it, Severus. When I'm around you, I see your magic. You're powerful so you were one of the first people whose magic I started sensing. The more I understood my magic, and the more I spent time with you, the more I could I see what your magic looks like. Your magic is strong, it's clear and sort of purple, but then there's something else, this darkness running through it. It's black and it doesn't move the same as your magic."

Severus said nothing. He didn't know what to say. He felt sick and violated at the just the possibility of what Harry was telling him.

"Can I see it?" Harry asked. Severus looked at him and Harry nodded at the man's left forearm.

Severus froze. Harry watched the man carefully, but he didn't move an inch.

"Harry…"

"I don't care that you have it, Severus." Harry was emphatic. "It's the past, but it shouldn't be a part of your future."

Severus took a breath and then began rolling up his sleeve, undoing the buttons of his cuffs with speed and dexterity.

It was as dull and faded as Severus said. Completely lifeless. Yet Harry could feel the stream of dark tendrils which emitted from it, subtle but definitely there.

"That's it." Harry whispered. He put his hand out, reaching towards the other man's arm but stopped short. "Can I?"

Severus looked straight in his eye. Harry thought he looked vulnerable; more so than he had looked even when he was dying in the Shrieking Shack. "You may."

Harry moved slowly, sensing Severus' tension and giving the man plenty of warning. The Professor kept his eyes unwaveringly on Harry, maintaining eye contact with Harry as he lowered his hand onto Severus' scarred forearm.

When they at last made contact, both wizards jumped as a spark of magic like a bolt of electricity ran through them. "Shit." Harry swore at the same time as Severus gasped.

After the initial burst of magical energy, things settled to a gentle hum between them. Harry kept his hand over the Dark Mark, feeling the same dark magic he had sensed before now twice as strong.

"This feels so weird." He commented.

"You can feel magic from the Dark Mark still?" Severus asked.

"Yeah, can you feel anything?"

"There is something…warm."

"Oh, that's not how the Dark Mark feels to me." Harry frowned.

"No, Harry. It is not Voldemort's magic, it is yours."

"Oh." Harry whispered again. "Mad." He frowned thoughtfully, still connected to Severus in both touch and magic. "Have you ever experienced something like this before?"

"Never." Severus answered, voice still tight. "There's no reason why your magic should be able to connect to me in this way."

Harry let go, breaking the connection, and Severus released a long, slow breath.

"I think my magic recognizes Voldemort's. Every time I felt the Dark Mark before, it was horrible, but it was familiar. Part of it was because I was so used to your magic, but another part of it is because I am so in tune with Voldemort's magic."

"You're nothing like him." Severus objected.

"I know, but a part of his soul lived in me for 17 years. My magic recognizes his. It always has." It should disgust him, but Harry was able to be matter of fact as he spoke of it. This was part of his life. He had learnt how to deal with it.

Severus for once was not the calm one. He had known of course that he was connected to the Dark Lord through his mark, but to hear that his magic still infected him was disturbing. While Harry sat, thoughtfully silent for once, Severus began unrolling his sleeve to recover the mark which so disgusted him.

"Wait!" Harry came out of his quiet pondering to stop the man. "I think I can get rid of it for you."

"What?" Severus hissed.

"There's something about the way it interacts with my magic." Harry could still feel the connection and while he couldn't explain how, he just knew he could siphon the dark magic away from Severus'. "I'm pretty sure I can lure Voldemort's residual magic away from you."

"Lure it where exactly?"

"Well, nowhere – hopefully. It should just disintegrate without a host."

"Or it finds a host in you." Severus countered.

"That's unlikely." Harry argued back. "There wouldn't be anything for it to latch on to."

Severus' lips pursed thin and he was back to rolling down his sleeve and buttoning the cuffs. "You are suggesting experimenting with the darkest of magic with absolutely no idea what could happen. The Mark no longer plagues me. There is no need to take such a risk."

As always, Snape spoke with authority, with every intention of concluding the conversation. Harry, however, had never really seen eye-to-eye with Snape's authority.

"It's tainting your magic." He stated quietly.

Severus paused. "What makes you say that?"

"I can see your magic." Harry reiterated. "I know what it looks like, how it feels, but this mark is tarnishing it. It's like rust."

Severus took that in for a moment before speaking decisively. "It's irrelevant. You have no idea what you're even suggesting."

"I know the magic, Severus."

"You know nothing! You have no experience with this, you have done no research."

"When would this have ever occurred before? There isn't going to be any books on how to do it!" Both wizards became more emphatic.

"Precisely! You cannot risk yourself doing something for which there is no precedent."

"We can just try it."

"You are not 'trying' anything." Severus insisted.

"But –."

"For Christ sake, Potter!" Severus slammed his hand on the desk angrily, causing Harry to jump. "I said no."

Harry sat back in his chair, defeated, wary and silent. Severus sighed and deflated. His elbows came onto the desk and his head fell into his hand as he rubbed his face wearily.

"Sorry." He told Harry gently.

"S'alright." Harry allowed, relaxing after Severus' evidently heartfelt apology. "It's a sensitive topic. I shouldn't have pushed."

"I did not mean to shout."

"I know."

"I apoloqize if I alarmed you."

"Severus, it's fine." Harry assured. "I'm sorry too. You know me, I'm not good at backing down from an argument." He smiled at the professor, hoping the joke would relax him somewhat.

It did, slightly. A wry smile appeared in acknowledgement of Harry's words. Yes, the professor knew that well.

"We had been doing well, I thought. Now, I fear, our argument will mean that you avoid talking to me for the next three weeks."

Harry rolled his eyes. "I won't." He promised. "We can have a disagreement and still be…friends. I still want to stop by and talk." He said, before adding more vulnerably. "If that's ok with you, I mean?"

Severus was relieved. "Of course you may. You are welcome anytime, Harry."

"Even if I don't have anything to talk to you about?"

"Even if all you wish to do is play chess or sit in that chair and read Quidditch books."

Harry couldn't hide a beaming smile. Each day he felt more grounded, more at home.

"There was something else I could talk to you about." Harry suggested.

"Oh?"

"My Auror interview is on Tuesday."

"Ah. Do you need help getting there?"

"Nah, that's okay. I've sorted my absence with Professor McGonagall. I'll walk down to the gates and then apparate to London."

Severus looked at him thoughtfully for a moment. "Would a portkey not be more practical? You could take it straight from the castle."

"I'm not taking a portkey anywhere." Harry narrowed his eyes at the professor. "And you know why."

Severus' look was sympathetic. "I suspected, Harry. I did not know."

"It doesn't matter. There are plenty of other ways to travel." Harry reasoned.

"There are." Snape agreed. "And I would not suggest you push yourself to do something you are uncomfortable with." He soothed. "Is this a recent development?"

Harry shook his head sadly. "Since the Tournament. Since Cedric."

"Of course." Severus nodded. "And are you feeling confident about your interview?" Though everyone else knew that Harry was a sure thing, Severus knew that Harry himself didn't feel that way.

"I'm nervous." Harry admitted.

"That's entirely normal." Severus reassured. "Just stay calm and remember to talk about all of your positive qualities and achievements."

Harry grinned, "You sound like Hermione."

Severus roled his eyes but was pleased by Harry's amusement. "Clever girl, that Miss Granger."

"Brightest witch of her age." Harry agreed.

"Good evening, Professor." Hermione Granger was always polite in every meeting and interaction.

"Evening, Miss Granger. How have you been?"

"Good, thank you, Sir."

"You're managing your workload?"

"Yes." She frowned. "Why? What's Ron said to you?"

"Mr Weasley has not said anything to me regarding your study habits, I am simply aware of the larger than average number of courses you are taking. I have also been your teacher since you were eleven and am very familiar with the pressure you put on yourself when it comes to exams."

"Ah, yes, ok, fair point." Hermione allowed a bit sheepishly. "I'm handling it."

"And if I were to ask Mr Weasley or Mr Potter if they agreed with your assessment?"

Hermione's head tilted thoughtfully. "Ron and Harry have different priorities, so they might think my habits are strange, but I enjoy studying and learning in the same way they enjoy, say, Quidditch. They both keep an eye on my stress levels and they know how to redirect my attention to something different." She explained, thinking of the DA and how much they all enjoyed dueling, learning new spells and revising and mastering old ones.

"Very well." Snape accepted. "Let me know if you do start to feel overwhelmed."

"Yes, Sir."

"I have something to show you." The Professor said then. He opened a draw in his desk, retrieving a shallow glass jar and placing it on the surface of the desk between them.

Hermione looked at the pot and waited.

"It's a salve that I want you to try on your scar." Severus clarified needlessly.

"Brewed by you?" Hermione checked.

"Yes, and experimental."

Hermione nodded. Nothing already approved had worked, so they could only explore new avenues. "What's in it?"

"I contacted George Weasley about the contents of his bruise paste and used that as a base product. I've combined ground Adder's Fork and Bursting Mushroom to protect the healthy skin with the smallest measure of Bloodroot to attack the scarred tissue." Severus watched Granger's face for her reaction but she was only calm and serious.

"Ok."

"We are only testing today – If you agree." Severus emphasized. "We will dab some onto a 1cm square of your arm at the edge of the affected area."

"Ok." Hermione agreed again. "Shall we start?"

"If you're sure you are ready?"

"I am." Hermione answered decisively, already rolling up her sleeve.

"Very well." Snape gathered some cotton tips and unscrewed the jar lid. "You will need to inform me of any sensations or side-effects you experience. Do not put up with any uncomfortable feelings because you are able to bear it." He warned firmly. "You must tell me if you notice any changes."

"Yes, Sir. I will."

Snape narrowed his eyes as he assessed her sincerity. Satisfied, he took hold of her arm and cast a spell to clean the affected patch of skin. He then picked up the Q-tip and dipped it into the salve. With delicate hands, the professor dabbed the solution onto one spot of her red, raised scar.

He tidied everything away efficiently as the paste dried in to her skin. "I will place a protective bandage over it before you leave this evening, but for now we will leave it to air and observe for any reactions."

"Ok. Thank you, Sir."

They both relaxed back into their seats and it was quiet for a moment as they watched the tine patch of skin they had treated.

"You have not experienced any more flashbacks then, I take it?" Severus asked eventually.

Hermione shook her head. "Not recently."

Severus didn't miss the evasion. "Anything else? Nightmares or panic attacks?"

"Not exactly." Hermione admitted. "Sometimes, it's not a flashback, bit I'll remember something and I sort of just freeze. I go a bit blank, stunned maybe. But it isn't being stuck in the memory like the flashbacks were."

"Are you able to come back to yourself?"

"If Ron or Harry are with me, they only need to call my name and I'm back. If I'm alone it can take a moment longer. I have to remember for myself where I am, that I'm safe. I'm getting better at that."

"Your feeling of security will increase over time." Severus assured kindly. "Have you been able to identify those places you feel safest?"

"The Burrow, I suppose, and our rooms here. Harry has them so heavily warded not a soul could get past them. The same for Grimmauld Place."

"And when you are with your parents?" Snape queried.

Hermione's eyes turned sad. "It is hard. I have home warded of course, but when I am away, I am terrified of how unprotected they are. I'm scared stiff of someone attacking them while I am here." She sighed. "But then when I am there, I feel vulnerable. Without Ron or Harry, without any other witch or wizard present, I am scared. I want to be there and away from there simultaneously."

"It will get easier." Severus said sympathetically.

"Yes." Hermione agreed softly. "I know."

"Have you felt any discomfort on your arm?" He asked after a moment.

"Only a cold sensation." Hermione answered.

"That is what I expected, which is good." Severus summoned a bandage. "I'll cover it now and we can have another look in the morning. I'd rather you weren't alone for another couple of hours before bed, however. Just in case you suddenly faint or some such."

"That's fine. The boys will be up."

"Will Mr Weasley be here to walk you back?" Snape asked, knowing the boy often ensured his girlfriend would not have to be alone in the corridors.

"Not tonight. We agreed he would stay with Harry tonight and keep his mind off his interview tomorrow so he doesn't freak out."

"Ah." Severus said in understanding as he tried off the small bandage around the witch's arm. "How is Mr Potter faring?"

Hermione smiled, warmly. "He'll be alright. He just needs to get it over and done with. It's the anticipation that's killing him. Harry's never been known for his patience."

"Indeed." Snape agreed. "Very well, I shall walk you back up to the dorms."

Hermione briefly considered saying that she could call for one of the boys, but concluded quickly that a request on the coin for one of them to come and get her would be received with panic over what might have happened.

"Ok, Sir. Thank you."

All of this might be a faff, but if it meant her arm would be only partially less disfigured, it would be entirely worth it.