Chapter Two: He Loves Me; He Loves Me Not
Canon Manga Info: Sasuke dodged several successive C2 shockwaves in his fight against Deidara and only used his Cursed Seal (CS) once. He even dodged a C4 shockwave and (only) pulled out the CS for a return trip back to Deidara. (A clay-based bomb's shockwave is extremely fast!) You can ask for scans if you feel like it. This speed is unmatched in the manga bar Ae using his full-charged Raiton armour when he poured Bijū-level chakra into it to enhance his speed (Mangekyō Sharingan Sasuke, who's slower than Hebi Sasuke, dodged this Version-One [V1] Raiton cloak easily and landed an attack, as well, something Kurama-Chakra-Mode Naruto couldn't even manage without Deus Ex Machina). In fact, he kept up with V2 Ae just fine, as well, as he predicated his every attack fairly easily (save the one that cost Ae his arm, so it was a win regardless in Sasuke's favour). It wasn't beaten till EMS Sasuke, along with high-tier Rikudō characters, wasn't introduced.
Warning: Morbid and Offensive Black-Humour (mostly of the Romance variety). This chapter was written with a very peculiar tone in mind.
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It rained cats and dogs—she could not hear herself think. Rain cascaded and spun a grey veil across the forest. Rain fell off rocks and trees in sheets, a gauzy curtain. Her young muscles rippled as she ran behind her team, green eyes barely able to keep track of them in front.
Sasuke stopped suddenly and took refuge behind the tree—its texture, rough and wet—that scraped against his right hand. His Sharingan was out, glowing like danger on his face. The branches overhead had reached out and intertwined into a tangled mess, but Sakura could still feel rain's cool lash. Heavy rain and wind pushed at her from behind as if trying to get her flat down. When she saw Sasuke flick his fingers to signal Neji to go right, she pressed herself flat against the tree and hid behind it.
It was a race against time to catch the Rock spies before they took off with the stolen scrolls. Tired and exhausted, they had hidden in a cave ahead. It was now or never! Chakra fizzled around Sasuke's right hand and turned into Chidori: it stretched out five meters ahead of him, and a bloodcurdling scream tore through the misty morn and shot out of the cave's mouth. The sound progressed into a gruesome shriek and, gradually, died out. The man was probably dead.
Standing stiff and alert behind the tree, Sakura could see nothing—she did not have Sasuke's unmatched foresight or Neji's Byakugan ability to cover a vast span of distance in a heartbeat. She was ordinary. Her skills were something she had made for herself. She was not born privileged. Little by little, she had honed herself into an exceptional Medic, but it was difficult to please Sasuke . . . he always nit-picked about everything she did. It was almost childlike, this side of his character to demand perfection in the tasks he gave her. He was never fair, not to her.
Steps, so many of them, sloshed through water, and she shrank into the ground to avoid any attack sent her way. She was a medic. Sasuke had asked of her to stay hidden. She was going to listen this time and avoid the lash of his scathing tongue. Rain filled her ears and eyes. She had one hand in the mud to keep herself steady as she wiped her eyes and face on the back of her hand. The noises, the screams . . . they were drowned out by the storm.
Sakura's eyes skittered across the area and then to Sasuke as he clashed with seven ninjas. Blood flew into the air and quickly disappeared under the rain. The men screamed. A few more cuts, a few deep slashes into the sides, tearing through muscles, and they were dead—all of them. He did not even have his Sharingan out. A bold expression was on his face. Something she was so familiar with. Something she intimately resented.
A loud sound distracted her, and she twisted her neck to look back at the noise Naruto was making: he had got so good at making Rasengan with a single hand over the past few months. It took him years to amass enough experience out of his Kage Bunshins to manage that. He shouted silly things, sounded off many obscenities as he slammed it into the gut of the unsuspecting ninja in front. It drilled into his skin and sent him flying back.
Two of his clones grabbed one of their injured teammates and carried him out of the fray. Sakura looked on through the sheets of rain to Sasuke clashing with another ninja in a manner as if he was playing with him. He could be so cruel, so sadistic sometimes. Her eyes were unable to see his face clearly: it was enshrouded by dim shadows of trees and heavy fall of rain between them.
Slowly, Sakura raised herself to her shaky feet. Biting cold was pressing in on her body; a cool wave raced through her, and her heart fluttered deliciously in response to warm her body. Harsh sounds of metal against metal were jarring—the motions of the Shinobis' sword dance, slow. Sasuke was just playing around. He cut here and there and then flashed to the back and kicked the man forward, sending him crashing into the mud.
The man was livid. Embarrassed. He clenched his teeth, raised that sword high, and charged, only to be shown the same courtesy again. His face was flat in the mud this time. Sasuke placed his sandal on his back and slammed him back down when he tried to get up. He was too weak to get away whilst he helplessly wriggled there like a fish out of water. It was odd to see Sasuke draw amusement from something so silly.
Her eyes roamed to the left to gaze upon Neji: he was a skilled shinobi; his swiftness and speed always amazed her. He was no Sasuke, but he was the second fastest shinobi in all Jōnin Squads. His fingers jabbed into the joints like lightning bolts and felled ninjas one after another. He sent men sprawling to the muddy ground, and few crashed helplessly into the trees around him.
Sakura was still looking when muddy hands grabbed at her throat and lifted her off the ground. Her eyes opened wide and turned to terror; her feet shook violently, unable to find purchase on the ground. The pressure was building at her throat. Sakura's eyes rolled back into her head and her throat spasmed violently. Her lungs burnt. She reached up and grabbed the man's wrist, and, releasing chakra into her hand, she crushed it completely. He let out a choked scream and faltered, and she slipped down from his death-hold. That was all she needed. She pushed back, slamming her back against the tree to dislodge her attacker.
His powerful grip slackened and Sakura twisted away and spun around. Her fist flew in his direction. He was still quite fast as he ducked and avoided her attack. The tight, trembling fist slammed into the tree and tore clean through. The broken bark crackled, swayed, toppled over to the left. She jumped back when his sword slashed through the air. He suddenly stopped. There was a glint in his eyes, and he opened his hand and the sword fell down. With inhuman swiftness, he opened his jacket and terror washed over her: so many explosive tags were stuck to his breast, and they were about to explode!
Sakura flashed back but it was not enough. Her mouth opened wide to let out a loud scream. That was when she felt someone grab her and flash away. The tags exploded; she could not see a thing, just a flash of blinding light. She got knocked out of the air and crashed into the mud, rolling on the ground and hugging her hand to her breast. Mud was on her face, her head, and matted on her hair and her entire left side.
Slowly, she pulled her head up and saw Sasuke standing in front of her, his wispy Susanoo out. Its rib-cage took the explosion's impact and cracked a little, pushing him back, his sandals slipping in the mud; but he held his ground, hands raised high, as the aura swirled before him and expanded wide to stop the fire's heat.
Her breaths were loud and quick, and her heart beat madly. She was sweating despite the chill of the rain. She straightened her torso and lifted herself up on her elbows and looked back. Neji stood with Naruto and two other ninjas behind her. His jacket was in tatters, and he held onto an injured Naruto.
Sakura looked back to Sasuke again, and her eyes travelled over his back and the bleeding arm: a thin, pointy rock was stuck in his lower arm, and fresh blood was going down his white elbow. At last, the shockwave passed and the spray of rain returned. The heat was gone. Rain cooled the hot air about them. He pulled his hands down, and Susanoo disappeared like a ghost.
His expression was guarded as he turned around and pulled the rock out, leaving a deep hole in his arm. He looked down and his face changed his time. "I thought I told you to keep watch. What were you doing? You could've got everyone killed!" he said, his voice sharp.
Sakura coughed, and her fingers reached up to touch her bruised throat. "Someone grabbed me from behind. I didn't—"
"You better pray it doesn't happen again—or I will send you home for disobeying me next time," he said in anger and walked away just like that.
Warm blood rose to her cheeks and she felt humiliated. Slowly, she rose to her feet and watched as he left all of them standing in the rain. She pulled her eyes away, distraught . . .
Night came and stars wheeled across the sky. The mission was over, but Sasuke's work was far from done. He sat alone in his office, skimming through the details of the mission. They had to chase Rock Shinobi disguised as Bandits and retrieve an official scroll in their possession. They stole it straight from the office by making a network of tunnels underneath the heavily guarded Security Department.
They were right under their noses the whole time, and no one saw it coming. If Neji's Byakugan had not seen through the ground and detected a subtle crack in the lower pillar, the crafty crooks would have got away. Still, it took so much effort. Sasuke did not even have time to form a proper team: he just took the men still in the office. And only the great Sage knew that he never wanted to take Sakura along with him, not after that last mishap.
Sasuke could see how desperate and hysterical she was in her mad chase of him. He hardly had any nice things on his mind about her. She was still the same: hopelessly infatuated and stubbornly childish. Years had given her no wisdom. He had tried to get her off his team many times, but it was not easy. Naruto was in love with her, and Tsunade loved her. She threw her in his face because she was probably—in her very humble opinion—the best Medic-Nin on all teams, and Naruto just wanted to put his prized Naruto-Chan in her girly place and be delighted about it all day long!
The things he did to please her, to keep her close—his stupidity was limitless. Naruto still could not understand that she was only using him to stay on his team and try her hand at persuading him to bed her. Her physical frustrations had only inflamed her mental obsessions. He had tried to pass subtle hints through Naruto's thick-head, but his ears remained clogged up with her passionate night-time warbles; and despite Naruto's precious stamina and interesting talents, he was rethinking this absurd team-arrangement.
He created the final letter on the scroll, watched it dry, rolled it up. Today's task was done. He got to his feet and took a few steps, the scroll still in his hand. He looked outside the office window, and then he turned his eyes slightly to look at the clock: it was three minutes past midnight.
He pressed his forehead against the cool glass, looking at the clear night sky. Rain had stopped hours ago. He moved a little and pushed the scroll into the large fancy-looking cupboard—courtesy of his own family. He wrinkled his nose when a familiar smell wafted to him from just beyond the door. Not a second later, the door clicked open and she entered his office.
"Why are you still here?" he asked, frowning. "Go home. We have a mission tomorrow."
When no sound came from her, he turned around and looked at her; Sakura stood in the bulb's dim light: she had washed her dirty hair; her fair face, framed in pink hair, was filled with a little desire; her cheeks, a little pink; and she breathed a deep sigh. She was holding a scroll in her hand. Her eyes were upon his face, and he felt as though she wanted to say something intimate—and very unbecoming—to him.
"I—" Sakura began and coughed, her fingers brushing against her bandaged throat, "—I came here to give you my report." She took three long steps and put the scroll down on the table.
Sakura kept looking at him and the red in his eyes, holding her gaze as if she wanted to trap him against the wall and have her way with him. There was a slight tremble in her pink lips (she was on the verge of speech), but she mashed her lips together to swallow down her words. His eyebrows went up, and then a slow, slow smile graced his face, the look in his eyes like that of a wolf staring at a carcass he wanted nothing to do with.
"What do you want, Sakura? I hope you haven't come here in hopes of playing like last time," he whispered in a lover's voice, and his face turned mischievous—that mouth curled in an exquisite smile.
Shock passed over her face and then it hardened in anger. "I came here to see if you were all right. That's all," she said and turned her eyes away, her cheeks red.
Sasuke raised his arm and turned it around a little with his other hand; it was bandaged, and the wound was almost healed. "Looks fine to me," he said and returned his eyes to her face. "Is that all?"
Sakura gulped down the big lump in her throat, her heart tripping; hot blood galloped through her veins as her budding arousal pushed her to him. She did not know when she closed the gap between them. She grabbed his hand, placed it on her cheek, and turned her face to kiss his palm and bit the tip of his finger. Her eyes darkened, and she pressed her body against him. The heat was unbearable: it made her head spin. She just wanted him to blossom against her. It was an honest thought, and she was not ashamed of it.
Moving her hand down, she pulled the jacket's zip down the length of his torso. She only made it halfway when he grabbed her wrist, his lips an inch away from hers. His hot breath blew across her face, and a shiver ran through her.
"Stop it!" he let out a low hiss and pushed her back. He looked irritated now, his Sharingan out and dangerous, warning her to back off.
Hot breath hissed in and out from between Sakura's teeth, and her face mimicked the expression on his with the same intensity. "You're hateful! I just want a bit of your time. You don't have anything to lose, but you test me because you can!" she choked out, shaking, balling her fingers into fists.
"Aren't you used to this treatment by now?" he mocked, and his mouth pulled into a half-smile despite himself. "If I were you, I would've given up on me a long time ago. I don't know why you even keep coming back to experience rejection over and over again. Do you take satisfaction out of this arrangement?"
Colour flew from her face, and then it deepened in her cheeks and lips. There was a ferocious glint in her green eyes, and the muscles in her face worked in nasty fury. "Don't mock me 'cause I love you. You have no right—no right! All I ever asked of you was to love me back. Even for a few moments, but you're so selfish. You only care about yourself," she said in a deep voice that wavered with the usual desperation.
"Why don't you love Naruto?" came the quick reply.
Her eyes flashed hatred and she felt singed by his words. "That's none of your concern," she said through clenched teeth and backed away.
"Of course it's not," he began and fixed her with an amused look, "why should I be concerned when you're using him to try and get in my bed?" He flashed her a meaningful smile and then turned his eyes away in a playful manner.
"T-That's not true." Emotions garbled her words as she stifled the sob that hurt her throat now. She felt humiliated. Stung. "I'm not in this team for you. Don't mock me. I want to prove myself as a shinobi to my parents. You wouldn't understand . . ."
He smiled and it was a cold smile that mocked her still. "Of course—that would explain your irritating habit of coming here, begging for a romantic tryst. Even your dodgy mouth has become boring now," he said coldly and held his stern, unflinching gaze.
Sasuke's words struck her and they struck her deep and they struck her raw. The sting was shameful. "You were never this cruel, Sasuke," she breathed out, took in a long breath afterwards, and went on, "you were never this cruel. I've loved you since I was a child. Why are you so hateful? You're never fair to me. You always hurt me. Why . . . ? Don't do this. Don't hurt me . . ."
Sakura's head was bent now. Her eyes misted over and streamed out fresh tears. She raised her hand and wiped at her eyes and tried to even out her breathing. When she raised her head, her eyes were red. He did not seem moved. He was cold—cold and cruel. His eyes slightly turned and he looked at the door. A smile danced on his lips and he spoke: "your lover is here. Want to continue? He may enjoy this free spectacle!"
She drew in a sharp breath. Anger flickered across her face, and she spun away and left the room. He heard Naruto call out to her, but she took swift steps to leave the building. A few seconds passed and Naruto entered the room. He was not wearing his usual grin that stretched his lips from ear to ear. There was an annoyed look on his face whilst he looked at Sasuke in an accusatory manner.
"You scolded her again?" Naruto asked, hands on his hips. "You're so mean, Sasuke."
"Nothing that would concern you," Sasuke said and turned around to pull out another scroll from the deep corner of the cupboard. "Why are you here? If you came here for Sakura, she already left a playtime invitation for you. Go and play with her and stop bothering me."
Naruto's face flushed in embarrassment and he looked away. "That's not what I asked," he said in a huff and crossed his arms. "Why are you up so late?"
"Office work," he droned and slowly opened the scroll. "You know, I don't care how you play with her—just keep her restrained. She's out of your control." He turned around and eyed him with annoyance in his face.
"You don't have to be so grumpy all the time," Naruto mumbled and looked up at the still fan. It had been shined to perfection: an odd Uchiha habit to keep things disturbingly clean. Itachi was even worse. Last time he went to that cold-tomb Sasuke enthusiastically called his Nii-Sama's lovely office, he could have sworn he saw his own reflection in that fan's blade; or it could have been his mind playing tricks on him. Itachi, in his humble opinion, was quite ghoulish!
"It comes with the heritage and responsibility. You wouldn't understand," Sasuke said with a smile. "How's your wife? She probably knows about your pushy little playmate. The whole team probably knows. I don't think it's a big secret. Soon, your parents will start breathing down your neck, and then you'll start weeping before me. It's an endless cycle, and it's tiring."
Naruto's eyes grew wider: he looked a little confused. "I don't think she knows. I don't think even my parents are certain of it. They like making guesses to shame me," he said, looking a bit alarmed. It was obvious that he was not sure of his own thoughts. The look faded from his face; he blinked and moved a little to face Sasuke. "I intend to end it, anyway—I just need the rank."
"Ah, the rank," Sasuke paused to widen the smile, "aren't you working hard for it? Playing with Sakura and all that . . . but I'm a terrible friend. Why would you need my advices? You could do without them."
"I love Sakura. You know that!" Naruto said, breathing heavily as he worked himself into anger. His cheeks and nose had turned summer red. "Do you always have to mock me?"
"I'm not mocking you. It's not as if you listen to me, anyway," he said and placed the scroll on the table, his red eyes meeting his. "Hinata is your wife. Her family, your family, will only make things worse for you. Go near her from time to time. That's all I'm saying. She isn't contagious."
His words silenced Naruto. He appeared to be lost in thought as if he did not know what to say. "How long has it been since you last touched her? Sooner or later, this will escalate, two clans will get involved, and she might just look for a lover . . . something interesting to look forward to rather than cleaning gardens and painting terrible lamps all day long—wouldn't you say?" His countenance was sarcastic now.
"Hinata would never do that, she—" Naruto broke off, and his expression in such moments was always a confused one. Sasuke could see a bit of anger stir in his deep blue eyes—that familiar male ego was still there.
"Oh? I didn't know she was a temple-nun living through her rigid oath of yearly celibacy in your absence," he said. "Your idealistic view of her is amusing. She is human. She has needs. Don't be a fool. I'm not asking you to drop Sakura. I'm asking you not to make things worse for yourself."
His words were met with astonished silence. Naruto had dropped his gaze to the floor. His eyes roamed here and there aimlessly. He was caught up in his own little world. He was always indecisive, naïve, and foolish—always had been.
"You can leave and play with your wicked lover. I have work to do," Sasuke said and resumed his office chair to write down the final report. It would take him a good one hour to review every detail; and, by that time, Naruto was already at Sakura's place, thinking about Hinata, his parents, and their betrayals. Somehow, it was pushing him over to the dream-like edge, and he felt something familiar wriggle inside the deeps, and he did not know why . . .
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EN: Nuns aren't restricted to Christianity; in fact, the word 'nun' isn't even biblical in origin. The most famous nuns in Japanese history were the 'Kumano bikuni'. They were groups of travelling nuns in medieval Japan who preached to women by telling them stories and showing them pictures. These stories and pictures often involved pregnancy and childbirth that concerned the female audience. Women took over the Ketsubonkyo cult as a result of the institutional and doctrinal association between various monastic nun orders.
These nuns carried the paintings that depictured the detailed accounts of the Blood Pool Hell and offered the doctrinal practices of salvation. Nuns also wandered prominent towns for fund-raising missions on the behalf of temples and shrines. These institutions were helmed and run by nuns.
The legend of a child nun figure originated from these institutions. She's famously called 'Yao bikuni,' and she appears mostly in Tokugawa-period gazetteers. The main elements of the story are that a little girl stumbled upon a peace of dried meat (human or mermaid) and that cursed her with immortality. Over eight hundred years of age, she dubbed the 'eight-hundred nun'. She's also referred to as the 'Shira bikuni' or the 'white nun', which refers to her snow-white hair or the fairness of her complexion or the white camellia she carries.
The Yao bikuni spread her teachings in the Jizo hall, from where the idea of the Blood Pool Hell was widely propagated by the 'medium' of female Jizo called Jizoko. Jizo holds an important position in the iconography of the 'painting of the ten worlds perceived within the mind' and the stages of the human life cycle that were carried across the country by the bikuni and used in preaching for fundraising.