Chapter 2
Bleeding Heart
The next few days passed in a state of blank numbness. She didn't go to school, and rarely even left her room. It wasn't uncommon for her mother to walk in on her staring blankly at the portrait of her and Masaya or sitting quietly, tears dripping down her face as she stared listlessly out the window.
She felt like she was slowly being torn apart, from the inside out. Her heart seemed to beat less, or hardly even at all. She was frozen. Frozen in the icy grasp of despair. To even breath felt like shards of glass were ripping at her lungs and trachea. Her stomach constantly felt empty, like a black void.
That day, Ichigo was still in bed, the blankets pulled up to her shoulders as she lay on her side, the portrait clutched to her breasts like her life depended on it, like her heart had been ripped out and she was trying to push it back in.
"Ma-say-ah…" She chocked, curling even tighter around herself. A fresh tide of tears broke loose, spilling from her eyes and blotting her face before dripping onto the sheets.
A knock sounded at the door, announcing the presence of her mother as she cooed to her softly from the door.
Ichigo, if possible, curled even tighter around herself.
The door opened and she could hear the soft padding of her mother's feet against the carpet as she crossed the room. The bed sank as her mother added her weight to it and placed. She placed a comforting hand on the exposed part of Ichigo's shoulder.
"I've talked to the school and explained the situation." She told her in a soothing voice, "They're sympathetic to your loss and wish for you to take as much time as you need to mourn. Mr. and Mrs. Aoyama also called.
Ichigo's tears stalled and she rolled over to stare at her mother. It was almost like looking into a mirror they were so alike. The only difference, at the moment, was their eyes. Ichigo's eyes sparkled with tears and a void of bottomless numbness while her mother's hazel eyes were full of sympathy.
Her mother gave her a small, sad smile then leaned forward to wipe the tears from her eyes gently, with the pad of her thumb.
"Mr. and Mrs. Aoyama called to let you know that the funeral will be held this weekend. Right now they're planning an open casket funeral at the cemetery a few miles away. They thought," her mom squeezed her hand, sending the message of her endless love and support for her daughter before continuing, "They thought you might like to say goodbye."
Ichigo swallowed the lump in her throat, nodding silently as her eyes burned.
Her mother shifted so that she was lying next to her daughter and pulled her into her arms.
Ichigo didn't refuse, needing, craving, some form of comfort even though she knew there was nothing that could be done for her aching heart. By the time her father got home from work that evening, he found his wife and daughter in Ichigo's room. The elder woman was still awake, stroking her daughter's hair. Ichigo had cried herself to sleep.
The next day she still did not go to school, but it was like waking from a deep, dark slumber. It was the first time, in what felt like forever she'd stepped outside her room. Yet, the numbness remained. She no longer noticed the sun in the morning, the feeling of the soft carpet brushing against her bare feet, or even the warmth of the shower that used to caress her like an old friend.
Her mom was with her again that day, always close, always there. Somewhere deep down, beneath the numbing pain, Ichigo was extremely grateful for her mother's presence. Though she would never admit it, it somehow kept her grounded in reality.
She walked into the kitchen that morning, long after school had started and her dad had left for work. Her mother was at the kitchen table, stacks of paper in front of her and her laptop open, telecommuting from work so she could be there for Ichigo.
She looked up at the sound of her daughter's footsteps, a look of surprise washing over her face.
"Hey," Ichigo mumbled, her voice cracking from lack of use.
"How are you feeling?" Her mom asked, pushing the chair away from the table and standing up.
"Ichigo wrapped her arms around herself, shivering as if cold despite the fair weather of the day."
"Hungry." She confided, staring at the white tiled floor.
"Would you like to help me whip up some onigori?"
Ichigo nodded slowly and shuffled across the kitchen to the sink as her mother pulled out the necessary ingredients from the fridge. She turned the water on, hot as it would go, and thrust her hands beneath the scalding spray. Despite the steam and the fact that her hands were turning bright red under the burn, she couldn't feel it. She could hardly feel anything at all.
White angelic hands reached past her and turned the knob for the hot water off. With a soft, delicate touch, they wrapped around her numb fingers and drew them away from the sink's basin.
"Don't use all the hot water. We'll need that." Her mother reprimanded in a quiet voice. She placed a bowl into the now empty basin and turned the tab back on, filling the contents of the bowl.
"I know you don't want to hear this Ichigo, and it's incredibly cliché to say, but I do know how you feel."
A sudden wave of anger she couldn't place made her blood boil. That was most certainly not what she wanted to hear. How could her mom possibly understand the feeling of loss and abandonment she was experiencing? Then that feeling quickly died. She wasn't her mom. She didn't hold her past memories or even knew a great deal about her past for that matter. She slumped her shoulders, tears brimming at the corners of her eyes.
Her mother moved across the kitchen to the counter, set the bowl down, and added a favorable amount of salt to its contents. Ichigo followed.
"I was in my senior year of high school when I lost my best friend." Her mother said so softly that Ichigo thought she might've heard wrong. She looked up to see her mother shoot her a sad smile, "Her name was Karin." She continued, setting out another bowl of left over rice, "She was my friend since childhood. She was tall, gorgeous, and empathetic, and had a great sense of humor, popular too. She'd always been friends with everyone, but our senior year that changed. My guess is that people got jealous of her or hated her because she had everything they wanted; I think she also had some family problems going on that year, but I don't know. I just remember her being constantly depressed, changing day by day until she couldn't take it anymore. The night she killed herself she invited me over. We spent a majority of the night together, talking and laughing about old times, but then she thanked me whole-heartedly for being her friend for such a long time. I told her we'd always be friends no matter what.
"I left that night with her alive and smiling. The next day I received a call from her family saying that they'd found her hanging from her neck in the closet."
Ichigo's hands stilled over the rice she'd been bunching together.
"I… Mom… I never knew…"
Her mother chuckled humorlessly, wrapping a completed onigori in seaweed and placed it aside to start another.
"It was hard, Ichigo. I was so shocked and anguished that I felt I wanted to die too. It felt unfair to my friend that I was alive and well, graduating my senior year with your father, happier than I'd ever been, but she was dead. I couldn't understand her decision or why she'd done it."
She finished another rice ball and added it to the pile, "But," she continued, "I eventually was able to accept what had happened and move on. At times, her death still affects me. When ever you do something amazing or spectacular, or even manage to accomplish something that's been really hard for you, I find myself picking up the phone and be half way through dialing her number before I remember that there's no one to pick up on the other end." She whipped her hands on a dishtowel, turned, and hugged Ichigo close to her.
"Don't ever forget Masaya." Her tone had shifted from the light and reminiscent anecdote she'd told to edged in fierce determination, "Though you may not be able to see him he is always with you." Her Mom used her index finger, pocking Ichigo in the chest just above her heart, "He is here, along with everyone else that loves you. Don't you ever forget that."
Ichigo burst into a fresh wave of tears, abandoning the rice ball she'd been in the process of making, and flinging her arms around her mother as she bawled into her chest, again seeking comfort from the pair of arms that wrapped around her trembling form.
The rest of the day passed quietly while her mom sat in the kitchen working and Ichigo occasionally joined her to catch up on schoolwork. She cried less for the rest of the day. Somehow, knowing that her mother understood her pain made everything easier. It was like sharing an insurmountable burden.
That evening, Momo and Yuki dropped by to wish her their condolences. Apparently they'd been coming by since day one to see if she were all right, but her mother had told them it wasn't the right time. Ichigo thanked them politely, promising she'd be back at school as soon as the funeral was over then waved them off.
"Why are you looking so sad?"
Ichigo nearly jumped out of her seat. That voice… it couldn't be…
"Masaya?"
There he was, dark hair shining under the glare of the sun, wide brown eyes a light. He reached out and enfolded her hand in his. He was there before her, smiling, healthy, and very much alive.
"Masaya?" She repeated uncertainly, reaching out and cupping his cheek in her hand. It was warm and smooth, pulsing with life.
"Are you ok? You've been really upset." His eyes were focused solely on her, loaded with concern.
Ichigo stared at him blankly, feeling a familiar heat at the corners of her eyes.
"Ichigo, why are you so sad?" He pressed, using the pad of this thumb to brush away her unshed tears.
"Because you're dead." Ichigo whispered. She couldn't blink. Somehow if she closed her eyes for even a fraction of a second she would lose him again.
Masaya's face fell as he looked away.
"I know," he said, regret and sadness edging his voice.
"You left me." Ichigo's eyes were swimming with tears and her fingers wound tighter around his hand, "After always promising to protect me." Her other hand closed tightly over the bell chocker Masaya had given her on their second date. It had mysteriously appeared though she couldn't recall wearing it.
His hand tightened around hers as well, shaking with suppressed emotion.
"Ichigo." His soft yet serious tone drew her eyes back to his. He was gazing at her, water sparkling at the corners of his eyes but his jaw was set in a manner Ichigo recognized. It was a look of set determination, "I'm sorry I left you. I'm sorry you will no longer be able to see me."
Ichigo's heart seemed to crumple before her. She scrunched her eyes against the impending pain, burning with despair until she felt the soft velvet tough of his palm rest against her chest, right over her bleeding heart. She swallowed and looked up to see him smiling fondly at her.
"I may no longer be where you can see me, but I will always be with you, Ichigo. I am apart of you." Ichigo gasped in horror as Masaya seemed to be fading. He was leaving her again!
"Masaya!" She cried, but fell silent as he pressed a glowing finger to her lips. His smile of bravado would've looked heroic if it had made it to his eyes. Instead, those large eyes were filled with pain.
"I am always with you Ichigo. After all, I am your Blue Knight." His last words faded out like a whisper in the wind, along with his image. Ichigo was left alone again, staring at the empty space he'd just disappeared into.
"Masaya?" She whispered hesitantly, hoping, praying that he would reappear before her, laughing gaily, taking her hand, and pulling her into an endless abyss of happiness. The seconds ticked by but he did not reappear.
"Masaya…" Ichigo's knees gave way, "MASAYA!"
"Masaya! Masaya! Masaya! MASAYA!"
"Ichigo!"
She was aware of the voice that screamed her name over and over, as if breaking through an invisible veil. She felt urgent hands grip her hip and shoulder, shaking her roughly. Reacting on instinct, she cried out, lashing wildly as a petrified sob left her throat.
"Ichigo!"
Her eyes flew open as her heart jackhammered in her throat. She felt trapped. She couldn't move. Her limbs were trapped against her torso. She fought even harder against the bindings, panicked sobs racking her throat; a cold sheen of sweat sticking to her body.
"Ichigo quit thrashing!" The voice of her father demanded.
She stilled instantly, large eyes making out the figures of her mother and father at her side, trying to unravel her from the bindings, which turned out to be her own blankets.
Heart still hammering in her chest, Ichigo sunk limply back into the mattress, not even bothering to wipe away the salty liquid that dripped from her eyes and matted her cheeks.
Her mother gently pulled the blankets out from under her and then her father tucked her back in again.
"It's ok Honey, you're safe." They whispered, but their reassurances fell on deaf ears as Ichigo continued to sob into the palms of her hands.
The next day Ichigo, again, found herself sitting on the windowsill, staring, like an outsider looking in, as the day progressed on the streets below.
She couldn't stop thinking about that dream. Had she really managed to speak with Masaya? But how? Had his spirit come to her to say goodbye? Like in the mangas? Or was she so driven into the wake of depression that she was shutting off and her mind was creating a new reality? One in which he would always be there… But that couldn't have been it. Even if it was a dream she saw him, talked with him. Her only conclusion was that Masaya had somehow managed to reach back through death in order to say goodbye to her. The idea seemed ludicrous. After all, she'd never heard of an event even close to what she'd experienced last night. Sure there were supernatural stories of hauntings but this just seemed so real, so close… but then there was the conversation. He had admitted her was dead. That thought felt like a sharp stake piercing her heart but she forced herself to move on, recounting everything he had said. As she recalled him always being with her as her Blue Knight, she stood from the window and relocated to her bed where she pulled the now finger printed portrait of the once happy couple from her bedside table. She stared at it. It was a surprise the image was not permanently burned into her corneas.
A knock sounded at her door, drawing her out of her endless musing as her mother walked in. She had dark shadows under her eyes for she had spent the rest of the night with her daughter, holding her as she cried herself to sleep.
"I need to go to the store. Would you like to come with?" Her mother asked.
Ichigo shook her head.
"How are you feeling?"
She shrugged.
Her mother sighed, running her pale fingers through her hair.
"Would you like me to pick up anything for you?"
"Not particularly." Ichigo replied, her voice barely able to make it over a whisper.
"Ichigo, I've signed you up to meet with a psychiatrist. I think, I think they'll be able to help you through this traumatic experience more than your father or I can."
Ichigo jerked like she'd been slapped.
"No Mom! You and Dad have been great! It's just…" Ichigo trailed off as her mother shook her head slowly, a knowing look in her features.
"Hard?" Her mother finished.
Ichigo hung her head.
"Ichigo, your father and I are not abandoning you. We'll still be here no matter what happens, but if you see a doctor they can provide you with much more therapeutic measures than we can. After my friend died, I was on anti-depressants for a while." Ichigo looked up glumly at her mother, "There's nothing wrong with asking for help. It does not make you weak."
Ichigo nodded but remained silent.
Her mom opened her mouth to continue, seemed to have thought better of it, then turned to leave.
"Have you heard from Mr. and Mrs. Aoyama?" Ichigo asked, wrestling to keep her emotions in check.
Her mother stilled in the door way then turned around. She looked somber.
"They'll be back in Tokyo the day after next… Mr. Aoyama called to say that they've cremated the body. They changed their plans. They think Masaya would've liked to have his ashes scattered around the world in areas he planned to study. There will still be a funeral when they get back, it just won't be open casket like they originally planned."
Ichigo felt her face crack into the barest hints of a smile. The expression felt foreign but she couldn't help herself.
"He would've liked that." She said, voicing her thoughts.
"I thought so too." Her mom nodded in agreement, "Well, I'm off to the store. Call me if you need anything."
Ichigo assured her that she would.
When she heard the dull thud of the front door close, Ichigo slid open the drawer of her bedside table. She reached in and felt around, groping in the dark until her fingers brushed against a cool metal surface that tinkled. She pulled out the golden bell, trailing behind it the red ribbon. It was the bell chocker Masaya had given her, the one she'd somehow been wearing in her dream.
Hot tears speckled onto the palms of her hands as she held it close remembering, like a cinema film playing before her, the day he had secured the trinket around her neck telling her that she was like a cat who needed to wear it so he wouldn't lose her. Well, he certainly got his wish. He hadn't lost her; she'd lost him.
"Long time no see, Kitty Cat." Ichigo froze, the image in her mind's eye fading, at the sound of the familiar patronizing tone. As if in slow motion, a few more tears dripped down her cheek as she turned, pupils followed by the actual motion of her head, to her neck, to the upper half of her body. Finally, her gaze rested on the owner of the voice, a tall, dark green haired boy with golden eyes, long ears, and pointed teeth; wearing a weird assortment of clothes that showed off his midriff. He was smirking, hands on his hips as he gazed at her through her open window, despite her room being on the second floor.
"Kisshu…" Ichigo breathed, staring at the alien in shock.
His smile broadened as he saluted her, then he vanished, reappearing in her room, a respectful distance from her bed.
"Don't you Earthlings usually have school on these days?" He asked in a carefree manner, floating back up into the air before landing crisscross next to her.
Ichigo hadn't said a word since he'd entered her room, not even to tell him to leave or get out. She merely stared, stunned by his sudden appearance.
Kish frowned, waving his hand in front of her face a few times, but stopped after receiving no reaction.
"What's the matter Ichigo?" He laughed, flicking her affectionately on the nose, "Cat got your tongue?"
His actions were an agonizing reminder of the way her and Masaya used to interact. Without warning, the tears began anew, flowing thick and fast as she clutched the bell tighter.
Kish jumped back looking utterly dumbfounded.
"What? Ichigo? I haven't even touched you yet!" He exclaimed, "Ok, well, I flicked you, but that hardly constitutes as…!"
Ichigo managed to shake her head but did not look up.
Kish instantly fell silent. He could tell something was not right. Should've probably guessed by his less than eventful entrance. He sat back down on the bed, closer to Ichigo than he had been before.
"Ichigo?" He prodded.
Ichigo sniffed, whipping her eyes with the back of her hands but was unsuccessful in blocking the flow of tears.
"Sorry," she muttered, making a pained grimace, "I've been a real mess for the past few days."
"You look like it." Kish commented, giving her body a once over.
"Thanks." Ichigo muttered sarcastically.
"No seriously, have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately?"
Ichigo shot him a glare.
Kish stood up and held out his hand to her. When she didn't take it, he took the initiative and grabbed her hand, pulling her gently from the bed to her feet.
"Come with me."
He led her out of the room, down the hall and into her bathroom with the air of someone who know where he was going.
"How do you know your way around my house?" Ichigo wondered vaguely.
"Ichigo, I stalked you for an entire year." Kish laughed, "I know everything about you down to that damn Strawberry shampoo of yours, which, incidentally, is not working for you."
Ichigo rolled her eyes.
"Somehow, I'm not even surprised."
"Yep. Any ways, if you want to use a good shampoo, use L'Oreal because you're worth it."
"Wow, how long have you been working on that one?"
"Two years. I've had time."
"Two much time." Ichigo said in an undertone as he flicked on the lights. Ichigo gasped as she caught her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were red and puffy; tearstains traced trails down gaunt, sunken cheeks. Her red hair was tangled and disheveled, parts of it were even sticking to her face.
"Told you." Kish gloated.
"Shut it or I'll sock you in the face." Ichigo threatened in a sad attempt of a threatening voice. She was still staring at her reflection, shocked by how much a few days had changed her.
Kish took her hand again, flicked out the lights, and led her back to her room.
"So what happened?" He asked, sitting her down on the bed and watching her so intently she shifted uncomfortably.
Ichigo wrung her hands together, her breath shortening as her heart leapt into her throat. She shifted her gaze, finding a particularly interesting expanse of carpet and staring at the small follicles covered in dust.
She felt Kish shift from somewhere next to her, probably trying to figure out how to get her to open up and talk with him.
"Could you pass me that picture?" Ichigo murmured, her voice barely over a whisper. With out asking why, Kish handed her the finger printed portrait.
She took it carefully, handling it like fragile glass as she stared at the image.
"Did something happen to Masaya?" Kish asked, unknowingly hitting the nail on the head.
Ichigo nodded, not even bothering to deny it.
Kish titled her chin so they were eye to eye.
"What happened to him?" He asked. His tone wasn't patronizing, it wasn't even light or carefree. For someone who had considered Masaya his rival, he was genuinely concerned.
"He's dead." She told him in such a small voice that Kish thought he might've heard wrong.
"What?"
"He's dead." Ichigo repeated a little louder.
Kish was silent, his expression unreadable.
"I supposed the makes you happy." Ichigo remarked bitterly.
Kish frowned, crossing his arms and shooting her a disapproving glare.
"I may have considered Masaya a love rival because he was the object of your affections but that does not mean I wanted him dead." He stated coldly.
Ichigo laughed dryly, "The entire time you were here you were trying to kill him."
"That may be true but by the end of my stay I realized how important he was to you. I realized there was no way you would ever see me the same way you saw him so I resigned myself to just be happy for you and him. As long as he kept you happy and safe then I was perfectly content to watch you from afar. I always did whish you would show me the same affection but that never meant I wanted my rival dead. Right now I deeply regret the loss of such a bright and intelligent boy, and even more so, the affect his passing has had on you."
Ichigo looked at him doubtfully.
"Look, I can't make you believe me, nor do I think you'll ever believe me, but at least accept my condolences."
Ichigo hesitated for a moment then nodded, thanking him quietly.
Kish reached out and when she didn't shy away, drew her to his chest, squeezing her gently.
Ichigo blinked at the foreign gentleness. She was used to him grabbing her, fighting her, and overall treating her in a rough manner, but this gentleness… it was pleasant, warm, and comforting, a combination of the embrace from her parents, and, she was surprised she could think this, more than she'd ever received from Masaya. She fell into the embrace, burrowing her head into his chest. She brought her arms up, wrapping them around Kish's middle as he held her.
"Have you been sitting inside for a while?" She nodded.
"Let's go do something."
She pulled away, looking at him as if he'd grown a second head.
"Come on. You can't sit around all day moping. It's not what Masaya would've wanted."
"What should I do then?" She snapped testily.
Kish crossed his arms, closing his eyes in deep concentration as he contemplated her challenged.
"Aha! Let's go to that amusement park!"
"What?" Ichigo exclaimed, backing away and looking at him as though he'd lost it.
"Yeah! We'll go on those fast moving worms, the big circle thingy and the ponies with poles through their backs!"
Ichigo was shaking her head in bewilderment.
"What's wrong now?"
"Kish, I can't…" Ichigo started, "My Mom could be home any minute now and-!" But she was interrupted when he suddenly leapt forward, grabbed ahold of her upper arm, and the two of them disappeared on the spot.
Ichigo blinked at the sudden brightness of the day, of the cobblestone pass she now stood on, the shimmering green of well-kept trees and grass, and the bright colors that decorated the rides. She could feel the warmth of the sun wash over her, the stifling heat of humidity engulf her. The cicadas buzzed in the near by trees. The bees sang as they went about collecting nectar from the carefully arranged flowers. Water splashed in the distance, gears ground against metal, and people screamed in unbridled joy. Kish really had teleported her from her room and taken her to a theme park. Said alien was currently tugging at her arm.
"Come on Kitten."
She jerked her arm out of his reach, her face purpling in rage, "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" Kish backed away, taken aback by her sudden reaction. Her face was darkening more and more as she swelled like a balloon full of hot air, "MY MOM IS AT THE STORE! SHE COULD BE BACK AT ANY MINUTE AND WHAT IS SHE GOING TO DO WHEN SHE RETURNS AND DISCOVERS I'M NOT HOME? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT WOULD DO TO HER? HUH? DID YOU EVEN STOP TO CONSIDER –!" But her ranting was cut short by a pair of lips pressing delicately against hers.
Ichigo blinked.
Kish pulled away smirking, "That's more like the Ichigo I know."
Ichigo's face reddened with embarrassment, purpled with anger, then deflated to a look of defeat.
"I really need to get back, my Mom will worry." She said apologetically.
"No need to worry. Your Mom is going to realize she suddenly has a lot more errands to run that will take the entire day. She won't be back until school lets out." Kish stated smugly.
Ichigo frowned, eyeing the alien before her suspiciously.
"What did you do to my Mom?"
"Nothing! She's perfectly fine! I just used a new technique I learned that's all."
Ichigo purpled at once, "You manipulative son of a – !"
Kish slapped a hand over her mouth, waving his finger back and forth in front of her as if scolding a naughty child.
"Now, now, let's not speak badly of my family members. There's no need to disrespect the dead."
Ichigo looked stricken, "Kish I'm –," but he interrupted her again.
" – What do you say we hit one of those worm thingies? I've always wanted to try one! OOO! Then we could hit a haunted house, ride the ponies…!"
Ichigo couldn't help but smile. For the first time in weeks she felt alive.
She quickly ran to catch up with the excited alien.
"Um, Kish, we should probably purchase tickets before we do anything." Ichigo panted when she finally caught up with him in front of a billboard that contained a map of the park and its attractions.
"Why?" He asked nonchalantly, looking away from the map to stare at her.
"Because we need to pay to be here!"
"Do you have any money?"
"Well, no, but -."
"Then what's the problem? Besides, we already got in without any one noticing."
Ichigo glanced around anxiously. Indeed, no one had seemed to notice. Teenagers walked arm and arm with their dates while children in matching t-shirts traveled together in a wild pack, followed by harassed looking teachers. Families traveled in small clumps, the elder of the children leading the way while the smaller siblings were carried in strollers, or perched on their father's shoulders. Everyone was laughing and talking, exclaiming in excitement. Overall they were normal people going about their normal day at the park. No one seemed to have noticed or even acknowledged the sudden appearance of the alien, or the girl in pink pajamas.
"See? We're fine." Kish repeated, turning back to the map.
Ichigo opened her mouth to express another worry when Kish jumped into the air clapping excitedly.
"Let's do that one first!" He exclaimed, jabbing his finger at an attraction colored in bright blue and orange. He landed back on the ground, spun on the spot, grabbing Ichigo's hand, and took off running.
"Ah! Wait! Kish!" Ichigo yelled, stumbling to keep up.
"Wormy thingy!"
"It's called a roller coaster!"
Kish dragged her, weaving and dodging through the crowd of people.
"Kish be careful!" Ichigo cautioned right before she slammed into a small child. The kid fell over, screaming before he hit the ground.
"Watch where you're going!" The livid parent screamed after her.
"Sorry!" She called apologetically.
Kish dragged her all the way to a large, brightly colored roller coaster ride. Ichigo wondered vaguely how he'd been able to find it in one go. Usually it took forever to navigate around this place. His grin broadened with excitement.
Ichigo fell into step next to him, panting from the sudden dash.
"So how do these work?" Kish asked, his wild excitement falling away to calculative curiosity, "Do you ride on top of the worm, under it, or inside it?"
"For the last time," Ichigo said, a slight edge in her voice, "It's called a roller coaster!"
"Yes, but how does it work?"
"Are you seriously telling me you want to do something with out knowing anything about it?"
Kish nodded fervently.
Ichigo rolled her eyes as she pushed a loose strand of hair back, "It's a ride, not a worm. There are seats in the cars that you're strapped into so you don't fall out."
The machinery above them rattled as the wheels clunked against the structure, followed by the screams of its willing victims.
"What are they screaming for?" Kish asked with a frown, his eyes following the trail of the boxed machine.
"It's also extremely fast." Ichigo replied, also watching.
"I have got to try this!" Kish exclaimed. Ichigo caught him just before he could make a mad dash for the front of the line.
"Not yet." She told him firmly. She felt like a mother admonishing her kid, "You have to wait in line like everyone else." She pointed to the line, which wound in and out of a shaded structure then up and down several flights of stairs. They were currently at the very end.
Kish's ears drooped.
"We'll never get on with this!" He huffed.
"We will. We just need to be patient."
The two of them fell into an awkward silence as they stood waiting. Ichigo folded her arms and looked around the park. Bright, green, and would-be clean if it weren't for the wrappers and uneaten food scattered randomly at different intervals beside the obvious blue trashcan. People walked to and fro, each with their own destination and thrill awaiting them. The scene was perfectly normal, a common day in the life of a human, but served as a painful reminder to Ichigo about who she had lost. The last time she had been here was with Masaya. She watched as a young couple walked by, hand in hand, laughing at some unknown comment the boy had just made. That had been her and Masaya. She remembered it as though it were yesterday. She looked past the couple at a food stand nestled in the corner beneath the shade of a large oak tree. He had bought her ice cream there.
Ichigo's chest tightened. She clutched at the area tightly, biting her lip to keep from crying. It was Masaya she should've been here with. A healthy, energetic, human boy rather than an alien. Alien…?
Ichigo quickly blotted her eyes before rounding on Kish, who didn't seem to have noticed. He was standing on his tiptoes, trying to see how far they were until the front of the line.
"Kish?" He didn't hear her.
"Kish?" She repeated. Nothing.
Huffing in frustration, Ichigo curled her hand into a fist, reeled back, and socked him in the back.
Kish yelped, falling forward and barely managed to keep from knocking into the people in front of him. However, the group of girls turned to look at him.
"Sorry." Kish grinned, scratching the back of his head sheepishly as Ichigo stared. Why weren't they reacting? Did they not notice Kish's large ears, the fangs, or even his oddly colored eyes? Where they oblivious to his choice of wardrobe?
Kish exchanged a few more pleasantries with the girls before rounding on Ichigo.
"What was that for?" He snarled.
Ichigo's brow furrowed.
"You've got some explaining to do." Ichigo hissed back.
"About what?"
"Like the fact no one seems to notice an alien walking around with a girl in bright pink pajamas!"
Kish blinked.
Ichigo crossed her arms, glaring him down.
"But people have noticed." Kish stated matter of factly, "That group there just asked me what anime I was from. What is anime any way?"
Of all the replies Ichigo had been expecting, that had not been it.
"They also wanted to know why you were in pajamas."
Ichigo's face burned.
"But, but, no one's been staring, or, or, whispering!"
"Actually they have."
"But I didn't hear or see anything!"
"Yeah, well, you also didn't notice me stalking you all those times either, so that's not really saying much."
Ichigo wished she could've turned to stone, eroded to dust then be swept away by the wind. This was mortifyingly embarrassing.
"What are you getting all red for?"
"Nothing." Ichigo ground out bitterly.
They lapsed into another silence as the line moved forward.
"It's strange." Ichigo commented softly after a long silence, "The past few times I was here I was with Masaya."
Kish reached out and enfolded her hand in his. It was meant to be a comforting gesture, but it drew tears to Ichigo's eyes. Masaya used to hold her hand like that.
Ichigo swallowed the lump in her throat, hoping it would take the tears. She was sick of tears. They made her feel pathetic, yet she couldn't stop them. She forced a smile on her face.
"After this ride we used to stop by that food stand over there. Masaya would never let me pay." Ichigo's grin broadened despite the tears rolling down her cheeks, "They have excellent ice-cream."
"You'll have to show me." Kish replied lightly. His tone was guarded, careful.
"Sorry," Ichigo squeezed his hand before pulling hers from his, "I don't mean to be a blubbering mess on you, it's just, I find it hard to believe he's gone… especially after the dream I had last night."
"What dream?"
Ichigo hesitated, wrapping her arms around herself as if to protect herself against the enemy of loss.
The line moved forward again.
"Ichigo, please tell me."
She looked up at him, deep into those molten yellow orbs full of concern and sincerity, then she found herself opening up. She told Kish about the accident, how she had come by the news, her jumble of emotions, and even the dream. The dream she had held like a closely guarded secret. Not even her parents knew. It seemed ironic that the first person she told would be her former enemy.
"You know what I think?" Kish asked as the gate leading to the awaiting cars opened. Ichigo's monologue had lasted all the way to the front of the line and placed them in the actual ride itself, "I think you really did see Masaya. I think what you saw was his spirit, and I think that dream was his way of saying goodbye."
Ichigo said nothing, mulling over what he had just said as she pulled the overhead harness down and buckled herself into place. That had been her original thought. She looked up into the sky, imagining that somewhere amongst those sparse clouds, her blue knight was watching her.
"Kish, what do you think happens when we die?" She asked.
Kish was silent as the ride jerked to life, small, circular legs latching and slowly climbing up the steep track. All around them people were chattering excitedly, craning their necks to see the apex of the climb, waiting, with bated breath for the inevitable plunge.
The ride dragged its passengers all the way to the top and paused before slowly tipping forward.
Through the sudden outburst of adrenaline-spiked screams, Ichigo was barely able to catch Kish's reply, "A new beginning."
Ichigo felt her stomach jump into her throat. The ride began to pick up speed as gravity pulled the cars into her waiting arms. The wind howled in her ears and her surroundings turned into a blur of color. It was so fast her eyes were streaming. The ride abruptly hit the ground, but no sooner had their organs settled that they were hurled into the next loop, spinning to and fro like a bird caught in a tornado. Ichigo squeezed her eyes shut, clutching the handles of her harness like her life depended on it. The wind roared in her ears, and suddenly, it was over. It was as over as fast as it had begun.
Ichigo stumbled out of her seat, using Kish's offered arm as support.
"What did you mean by 'a new beginning'?" She inquired as they left the ride through the assigned exit.
"On my planet, we believe in several stages of life." Kish began, "It goes from the smallest atom, to matter, to cells, etc., all the way to the elements. Even at that stage there are four different paths, but the highest, and most honorable, is the spiritual. Very few have ever gotten that far. It's been centuries.
"Is that like reincarnation?" Ichigo asked.
"No, reincarnation only implies living as a multicellular being. The stages of life I'm talking about are like gateways. A new individual is not born as another but rather becomes closer and closer to being one with everything. Everything is connected as a whole."
Ichigo frowned. She was finding it difficult to grasp what Kish was saying.
"I don't really understand." She admitted.
"A lot of us don't until we get there. We really only have guesses for what we believe those stages to be like."
"Then how can you put so much faith in something you have no proof about?'
Kish smiled slyly, "You mean the same way earthlings do?"
"Fair point." Ichigo conceded.
"Plus we do have proof."
"How so?"
"Well, your dream is proof. It proves that one of the stages, the guardian stage, is a part of the cycle."
Ichigo fell silent at this, remembering the way she had seen and spoken with Masaya in her dream. She remembered his promise, his sworn oath of protection. If what the aliens believed was true then did that mean he was really still with her? Were they merely separated by a veil? The thought sent a rush of warmth through her. She hadn't even noticed Kish had stopped until she ran into him.
"I've never been able to understand," Kish stated, drawing Ichigo from her train of thoughts, "how those poor animals can stand having poles through their backs."
Ichigo followed Kish's gaze to a circular ride. The attraction had a multitude of brightly colored and lavishly decorated horses that were suspended off the ground by a thick golden pole that ran from the length of the ceiling all the way to the floor.
Ichigo snorted before busting up into a fit of giggles.
"What?" Kish demanded, rounding on her.
"They're fake!" Ichigo explained, clutching at her stomach like she was fit to burst, "They're not real!"
Kish blinked, looking more closely at the horses.
"Come on, I'll show you." Ichigo laughed, waving her hand in a follow-me motion as she set off for the line.
She led him onto the ride after hurriedly coming up with a cover story for their appearances to a small group of children. Even getting on the ride they were trying to shake off a small boy who kept asking Kish where he got his ears and wondering aloud how he had changed his eye color.
"Wow, they really are fake!" Kish exclaimed, running his hand down the sculpted plastic.
"I told you." Ichigo giggled, clambering onto the back of a black steed, "No get on before the ride starts."
Kish easily jumped aboard an artificially designed palomino.
"So what does this ride do?"
"You'll probably be disappointed after the roller coaster. Some carnival music will come on when the ride starts, it will revolve around the middle, and the ponies will go up and down."
"That's it?"
"Pretty much."
"Weird…" Kish muttered.
"It's for children." Ichigo defended.
Just as Ichigo had said, the ride started up as soon as the up beat music turned on. It continually went around in a circular motion, and the ponies barely seemed to move. Kish, however, did not seem disappointed as he watched the ceiling for the most part, studying the mechanics he could visibly see.
"Are all the rides run off electricity?" He asked as the ride came to an end.
"I think so." Ichigo replied, dismounting.
"To power this much though, how much energy is being expended?"
Ichigo frowned.
"I don't know. I've never really given it much thought."
Kish shook his head in a disapproving manner.
"What?" Ichigo asked defensively.
"Whoa! Don't get mad!" Kish exclaimed, holding his hands up in a calming gesture, "Our lives are just different. My species would see this sort of entertainment as pointless and harmful to the environment, that's all."
"Oh, and what do aliens do for fun?"
"Lots of things. We don't need machines to defy gravity after all." Kish smirked, his eyes twinkling, "And for the record, we're not aliens, we're called the waulrinswi."
"Wall – what?" Ichigo asked.
"Wall – rin – swee." Kish punctuated. "It means to walk on two legs."
"But that's what homo sapiens means here."
"In your world, yes. We speak differently where I come from."
"You're world's weird." Ichigo said tonelessly after a long pause.
Kish quirked a brow.
"I could say the same for Earth."
"I suppose…" Ichigo replied, suddenly feeling self-conscious. She shouldn't have said that about Kish's planet, especially when she didn't know anything about him or his species outside of the Deep Blue incident. She looked around wildly, trying to find something that would steer the conversation to a lighter place. That distraction came in the form of a red and white colored stand up ahead, smelling of baked sugar. A man stood over a machine with a conical stick, scraping pink fluffy material from its sides. Ichigo grinned.
"Here's another thing we "earthlings" enjoy." She grabbed Kish's hand, dragging him to the stand. She couldn't wait to see the look on his face when she told him to eat it. However, her face fell as she got close enough to read the prices. She'd forgotten that they didn't have any money.
"What's the matter?" Kish asked when Ichigo stopped.
Ichigo pointed wordlessly at the price list.
"Oh, I see." He replied, letting go of her hand. He strutted over to the stand, "May I have two of those?" He asked the man.
"That'll be ten yen." The man replied.
Ichigo watched as Kish merely stared at the man, who seemed to be getting impatient.
"That will be…" The man began, but trailed off as a dazed look seemed to wash over him. His pupils dilated to the point where his eyes were vague and unfocused; his mouth hung open slightly, and when he moved, his movements were awkward and jerking as he handed Kish the candy and thanked him for his purchase. As Kish turned to leave, he sat down, rubbing his temples, and blinking rapidly, as if suddenly being roused from a deep slumber.
"Here you are."
Ichigo took the candy handed to her looking dumbstruck.
"What did...? What did you do?" She stammered, still staring at the merchant who was now back on his feet and making more.
"Nothing really." Kish said with a shrug, eyeing the sugary treat he held, "More importantly, what is this stuff?"
"More importantly?" Ichigo repeated in disbelief, "What did you do?"
"I just learned a new trick. That's all." Kish replied off handedly, "It's no big deal."
Ichigo felt like she was going to get hysterical at any moment.
"No big deal? You were controlling some one's mind!" She snapped fiercely.
Kish clamped a hand over her mouth, gazing at her sternly.
"Not so loud Kitty Cat."
Ichigo slapped his hand away.
"How long have you been able to control people like that?"
"I don't know." Ichigo realized with a start that Kish was beginning to look uncomfortable under her interrogation.
"Kish?" She asked softly, "Are you ok?"
He averted his eyes.
"I'm fine."
Ichigo bit her lip. She wanted to say something, but she couldn't pry. Kish didn't want her to know, so it was none of her business until he chose to disclose it to her.
Feeling frustrated at her lack of ability to help, Ichigo pulled out a chunk of cotton candy and tossed it in her mouth.
"What is this stuff?" Kish asked, pointing unnecessarily to the untouched candy.
"Oh, it's cotton candy." Ichigo informed him.
"You want me to eat cotton?"
"It's not cotton, it's candy. It just has the same look and texture of cotton."
"Still sounds like cotton to me." Kish grumbled.
Ichigo shoved him playfully.
"Just try it."
"Fine."
Kish brought the candy covered stick up to his mouth and took a hesitant bite. He sat there for a second chewing before his eyes widened.
"It disappeared in my mouth!" He exclaimed.
Ichigo giggled. She turned to follow the flow of pedestrians.
"Come on Alien Boy," she called over her shoulder, "You still have plenty more to see."
Just as Kish promised, they returned to her room well before her mom got home. The two of them were sitting on her bed, the pink comforters now decorated with packaged candy, empty wrappers, balloon animals, and even a large, stuffed, Hello Kitty plushy Kish had won for her at one of the carnival games.
Ichigo fell onto her back, smiling so much that it hurt. She couldn't believe that not too long ago Kish had been an enemy. He was enthusiastic, charming, and downright fun to hand around. She rolled over so that she could face him as he held up another package of candy, turning it so the light caught it at various angles. He looked like a scientist examining an experiment.
"What is this stuff?" He asked, shaking the package as if the sound would give it away.
"Ramene candy." Ichigo replied, "Try it. They're really good."
With a shrug, Kish easily ripped open the package, picked out a blue, bottle shaped hard candy, and popped it into his mouth. The next second, he had spit it out with a yelp.
"It dissolved into fizz!" He exclaimed, pointing at the offending object on the floor.
Ichigo lapsed into a fit of giggles, rolling around comically across her bedspread.
"What?" Kish demanded, nonplused.
"It's supposed to!" Ichigo gasped the moment she was able to catch her breath.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I was going to, but your reaction was priceless!" She sniggered, before lapsing into another fit of giggles.
Kish glowered at her, which only succeeded in making her laugh harder. He reached into the back and pounced on her, shoving another one of the hard candies into her mouth.
Ichigo barely managed to not choke. Instead, she pushed Kish off of her and sat up, miming to be enjoying some sort of rare delicacy.
"Earthlings…" Kish muttered under his breath."
"I would take that as an insult if you weren't grinning like a moron." Ichigo said around the candy.
The sound of the door opening made them freeze, both their eyes as wide as saucers.
"Ichigo, I'm home!" Her mom called up the stairs. The door slammed shut followed by the jingle of keys hitting the plaster as they were hung on the key rack the family kept by the door.
Ichigo looked in a panic at the amusement park evidence strewn about her room, and at Kish who was sitting next to her.
"Hide!" She mouthed, making a desperate dash for the mess before it suddenly vanished. She looked in bewilderment at the now clean bedding, then at Kish who was smiling pleasantly.
"What? Did you…? Did you do something?" She asked uncertainly.
Kish flicked her nose playfully.
"I told you. I learned a few tricks." He said mysteriously before vanishing on the spot.
Ichigo frowned, staring at the empty stretch of air that used to be an alien. She'd have to demand him to give her answers about these "tricks".
A/N: Thank you every one who has reviewed. I really appreciated your comments and feed back. I'm sorry it's taken so long for this chapter to be posted. I had a bit of a hard time writing it and I still have no editor :(. The next chapter will be getting into the plot, the part I've been dying to write. Hopefully that one will be up sooner XD.