#3

If there was a scent of betrayal, it would be blood. At least that was what happened to those who snitch. At least that was what Elizabeta thought when she heard rumors that people began to put the heat on her, even when she did nothing.

For a couple of days now, since that dreadful Charlie deal, she decided to stay hidden, not doing anymore deals with anyone. She shut the door to those who wanted to buy and sell. She called off party nights and hang-outs, even to the point of locking herself inside the apartment, scared that bad people might find her, take their chance to destroy her, taking advantage of her kingdom she had been building from scratch. Elizabeta had come so far from her ruined teenage life to what she was now, a crowned drug lord…. That soon to be gone thanks to those rats under the stairs. Nobody could take her life away. Not even hobos and punks and cops. She would do what it was necessary, killing those who threatened her empire, wanting to take it away.

Or rather to ask Sidney to do so. How many she had killed on the past week?

A fake punk, thought he was better than anyone else, decided to play the jerk and pointed gun at Lizzy, who had died on a fatal car accident after losing control of the wheels, after Sidney had rigged the engine to explode.

A couple of hobos working together busting out Lizzy's deals and stealing drugs and sold it to wide markets for some quick money; who died cruelly after disagreement led to them killing each other, after Sidney came to their hide out that was.

There was this guy, Mark, that had been reluctantly giving information to the federal officers in exchange of money and new life. Said he was getting his criminal records disregarded and later able to go other state as free man. He claimed he wanted to see his son again. That was until he died of overdose, after Sidney had chugged him some morphine one too many.

Oh, plus the bathroom guy just yesterday.

All those kills in a week, yet Lizzy wasn't pleased. All of those kills in a week… what more could Lizzy do? What more could Lizzy ask her to do?

"Sidney, baby, I gotta know." Elizabeta suddenly spoke out loud. "You are with me right?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, like with me, till the end. As in I look after you and you do too."

Sidney cooed. "You questioned my loyalty? Do you think I'm a snitch? Do you want me to kill myself now?"

"N-no. Shit, not at all, Sid. I just want to make sure I have someone on my back." Elizabeta said. "I feel like I have more enemy than I should have. Like… like I'm making everyone a target."

"That, I agree actually."

"Hey!" Elizabeta jabbed her in the arm with enough force that caused Sidney to lose grip on the steering wheel for a second. She cursed at her for almost making them tripped over the bridge and sank down the Humboldt.

The Puerto Rican woman apologized and let out a sigh. "I know, I know. I made a mistake talking to people I shouldn't talk to. I let my guards down and now our backs are open. Because of me we're hiding."

"You are hiding, I'm still living my life. Don't drag me into your hole." Sidney retorted casually, her eyes still glued to the road. "For real though, a UC? Did you not being careful?"

"This contact came out of nowhere. I thought he was legit. I fucked up trusting him. That was my bad."

"We were fine before. I know how clean your plans and deals are. But this… I came home to this mess. I've only been here for week and look how many people dead."

"Like you actually care about those people. You killed without even asking."

"Hohoho, of course. Blame the vicious dog and not its owner. Is that how you really want to do me?"

"No, no. Sorry. I wasn't thinking straight." Elizabeta frowned at the statement. "I dunno what happened to me."

"Oh, I tell you what happened. You snort to much coke, your brain started to turn white."

"Oh shuddup… huh, I guess I was too selfish too realize I was careless. Shit. I got fucked, hard, didn't I?"

"Lube less."

Elizabeta snorted at the sharp tongue Sidney had always been. The one that seemed to never take anything seriously, yet always be ready for anything. And when she was ready, jokes were nowhere anymore. That what she liked about Sidney, that was the reason she reached out to her on the first place, all of those years ago.

Seemingly an ordinary woman who seemed to have chosen the wrong path of life, like all prisoners did. Yet there was something that stood out about Sidney when she first saw her. Something about her story and the way she held a principle of life so strongly that helped her survived. Something about revelation and motivation that helped her thrived in the harsh cruel world.

Sidney was like them, all of them. A victim of ignorance, a victim of injustice. Her purpose was only to make things right again, make things straight. Of course it was never easy and she had paid the price, an expensive one. It was so expensive that she had no choice but to sell her own life. Trying things she never done, planning things she never thought of, doing things she didn't want to do. All only to bring peaceful justice to herself. If killing could be considered peaceful.

"Hey Sidney?"

"What?"

"Now that you've mention it… you never told me what happened in Tennessee."

Sidney's lips twitched into a downward curve. "You never ask."

"Hey come on now. You know the drill. You always tells me anything." Elizabeta reminded her. "So? How was it?"

Sidney let out a heavy set of breath from her mouth, a loud huh followed. "I guess, things worked out alright."

"Did you find the Michael guy?"

"Uh huh."

"Did you, you know… kill him?"

"Yeppp." She replied, popping the p.

Lizzy knitted her eyebrows. "Was that it? That easy?"

"Killing assholes is always easy, Liz."

"How did you do it then?"

"After we had our talk, he tried to fight. I chased him into this remote hills. I shot his legs and body. The cliff did the rest."

Elizabeta nodded. "So… it's over then? He was the last guy, you said. Right? How are you feeling?"

"Yeah, sure."

For a moment Sidney had gone quiet, eyes fixed on the road. But Lizzy knew better she was avoiding her, avoiding the question. What happened there? Was there something Lizzy missed out? Was there something Sidney hid from her? Again?

Lizzy decided not to press, however. With Sidney, only time would tell.

"Alright. What about Niko? What do you think of Niko?"

"Why should I be thinking of Niko now?"

Elizabeta shrugged, casually leaning by the door, looking through the city lights. "Dunno, he suddenly came into my mind. He's been decent to me but what do you think?"

"If you say he decent then he decent."

"He had a lot of stuff going before. Mallorie said he needed covers from the other side of the town. I was worried at first but he works."

"What does she mean by covers exactly?"

"Running away from bad guys in Broker. I think it's some Russian mofos. What do you think about him?"

"I told you I don't pay attention much."

"You pay attention to anything. Come on. I wanna know what your verdict on him. I mean you know better what to score of him, being fellow killers and all that."

Sidney glances to the bigger woman and shook her head. She stated. "I guess he's fine. He's skilled and precise I'll give you that but man he's blundering all over the place. The dude pays no respect to play it calm and quiet, he just goes ham like shit." Sidney momentarily went back to watching him bullet-raining the so-called unions and the time when she peeked in to see all the dead body inside the Triangle Club. "Maybe because of that people like him. Playboy digs in. Dwayne digs in. I gave him to Roy and he was please to have his ass. So, yeah, he's cool."

"That's my concern, actually." Elizabeta confessed. "He's building up image. He's calling. I'm worried wrong people are clawing him."

"Is it my fault I gave him jobs?"

"Not like that… I mean, rumors has it, he's been screwing that Francis McReary."

Sidney made a face. "You worried about him? He is even more of a crook than both of us really."

"Crook or no crook, he is still a fucking cop."

"Cop or no cop, he's still a crook to me." Sidney inferred.

Elizabeta shook her head. "Sure, officer."

"Hey, stop it now!" Sidney glared at the chuckling woman in front of her. But then she dismissed the joke nevertheless.

Sidney started. "You allow me to work with a lot of people too. What's the difference now?"

"I know you better than anyone else. I know that wherever you are, whatever you do, you'll always come back to me. And I'm thankful for that. Really, Sid. I am."

"You're welcome."

"With everything that has been going on, I just need to be careful with the people I get to know. I don't wanna do the same mistake all over again…. also I know you won't ever work with cops. Not ever."

"Tch. Yeah sure, I guess."

Reluctantly Lizzy nodded. "He's also kind of good-looking."

Sidney managed a short laugh. "Have you seen his face all? Big pores all over the skin. Gaunt and unkempt. Sheesh, cute is the last thing I'd say about him."

"What is it then?"

"I'd say… miserable."

"Of course, your standard is too high."

"He is from Europe. Europe have high standards anyway."

"Yeah, whatever you say, bitch." Lizzy snorted. "But hey, look. Watch over him, please. I always trust your judgement. Watch him and tell me everything you know. If there's anything fishy about him, you know what to do."

#3

A gush of wind went by, plucking some yellow leaves from the branches, letting them flew away to a crowd at the yard. Some leaves keep flowing with the air, others not so much lucky when a group of children jumping around, fishing the flying leaves.

Even with the wind, it was a clear sunny day, that day. The sky was bright blue without shades of clouds covering the sky. Birds could be seen flying here and there. It was such a calm and peaceful day in for a small town by the hillside. A nice town, home to over three thousands humble men, women, and children. Farmers collectively gathering woods, housewives tending the cattle, chatting amongst themselves about latest town gossip, innocent students playing at the playground, screaming and laughing. They all look so happy and healthy. It was all admirable.

But of course the world was a cruel place after all.

A red flare sparked high, and march of soldiers came into view, along with their guns and glory. Within mere hour, the farmers defended and died. Women were trapped and raped. Children were crying and wailing. It was still a beautiful sight, though as he remembered cheering all over the bodies.

A bullet zoomed by, barely hitting his arm. Niko cursed out loud and shook his head. Damn, why sudden flashbacks in the middle of gun fights. But how could he not? The sound of bullet and the smell of blood was always a familiar experience. Something he could never forget. Even after so many years, he always remembered what it was like to live in the warzone. The days of hiding inside the trench, thirsty and hungry and tired. And most of all, waiting. He along with a hundred plus of men were wretchedly waiting for a signal to start the plan. To earn victory. If that was a victory.

Another bullet went pass his head. Shit, now was not the time to mourn his own past. He had a job to do, a man to kill.

Soon enough Niko had killed all of the men. It left him with this poor guy, already cornering behind the electrical box like a little mouse in hiding. Sure, Clarence had a lot of back-ups, coming from every directions. But nothing he couldn't handle, really. All of this gang-bang was nothing compare what he had done in the battle field. This little men compared to mine-bomb, air strike, and tanks… kudos for them, they out up a brave fight, just not brave enough.

"Come out Clarence. There's nothing you can do anymore." He warned, closing in to his target.

"Yoyoyo, man. Chill, you got me alright. Chill. I surrender." The African-American guy finally came out. "Hey, you look like a good guy, you wouldn't kill unarmed man, would you?"

"The police wants you gone." Niko stated, raising his gun at him. "I've got no choice."

"I fucking knew it. That rat cop McReary, ain't it? I'm telling ya' man, he ain't right in the head. He's using you, man—look, you got no choice. I-I'll give you one, okay. How much he pays? I'll pay double."

"Negotiation isn't my type of work. Sorry."

Niko was about to pull the trigger when he felt a clink behind him and something instantly pressed on the back of his head. Shit, he thought he killed all of them.

"You're ready, I'm ready… Let's pull the trigger together, shall we?"

He internally cursed. Of course. It wasn't a surprise anymore. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Eyes to the front, dude." Sidney said from behind. "It was you who caused such mayhem down there. I'm impressed."

"What is this bullshit, Sidney? What do you want?"

"Funny, isn't it? I'm always around whenever you're on a gig." She cackled. "Maybe we are destined to each other. How cute."

"Cut the bullshit, Sidney. Or are you going to stop me?"

"No. I'm stopping both of you." Sidney said, already pulling out a second gun and aimed it to Clarence. "We're not done here, son. We still have business to talk about. Don't you fucking run."

"Shit, momma. I won't. Word!"

"But I'm going to you first, Niko—do you know what the fuck you're trying to do?"

Niko glanced to her from the corner of his eyes. "I'm paid to kill him. That's all."

He heard she clicked her tongue. "This guy here is one of Lizzy's party. I was having a good deal with him until you came running and shooting. And that's not nice."

He sniggered. "Yeah, no doubt."

"So, in other words, you kill him, you mess with her. You mess with me. And you don't want that, do you? Let me remind you to those who turn your back against us. There's this guy—"

"What I want is not your concern." He blatantly said, straightened his aim at Clarence, who was already drained in sweat and tears, and maybe piss. Niko heard her groaning from his back but she didn't say anything. He scoffed. "Go away, Sidney. I'm not interested in your game."

"You one selfish man. You really are gonna kill him, are you?"

"Yes."

Niko felt a the weight of her gun on his head tightened. But then as quickly as she came, it was gone. She let out a sigh and walked up right next to him. "At least made him transfers Lizzy's money before you do that. This sumbitch owes her a lot of money."

Suddenly, Clarence went on his knee, begging and pleading. Both Niko and Sidney abruptly looked down to the poor man. "H-hey, man. You got me, okay. N-no need to get violent," Clarence stuttered, literally bowing down on Niko's foot. "Y-you killed me men. You kill Johnson, my bro. I tell you what I'm through. I get out of the game. Word."

"Really, Clarence? Are you this of a pussy?" Sidney snickered.

"Sidney, love. This guy killed everyone I know. I-I don't have the choice anymore. I… shit, I'll get a diploma or some shit, I'll reform. Make something of my life. Shit. Elizabeta can have what she wants. I'm done, Word. I'm done. I'm sorry. I'm too young to die, please—I'm sorry, sir. Please, please don't kill me, good sir."

Niko's breath hitched at the sight of a young girl kneeling in front of him, dressed torn, legs bruised, face frightened. He remembered this girl from the town he ambushed. She was roundabout fourteen or fifteen, not much younger than himself, yet she called him sir. That wasn't so right, was it? But he remembered her. He remembered shooting her father and brothers. He remembered watching his fellow war brothers began beating her and holding her down. He remembered pulling his pants down, joining the others. He remembered it all. He remembered what a cold, heartless, monster he was, he had become.

"Hey dude, are you gonna kill him or no?"

Sidney was more than baffled when the Serbian man had walked away. "Hey, dude. What?"

"Get out of here, you dick. Get out here and never be seen again." Niko stated, not even turning his back.

"Y-yes! Thank you, baby. You the man. You the boss of me. I promise you, McReary'd think I'm dead, word."

"Whoa, hey. Hey! What the fuck?"

"What are you waiting?! Fucking go! If I see you again, you'd wish I had killed you now." Niko warned him.

Sidney's confusion turned into resentment when Clarence had completely bail from the rooftop, not even care to say anything to her. This felt so weird and so wrong altogether.

"Yo! The fuck you think you are?" She hurriedly caught up to Niko. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Fuck off, Sidney."

"But w-what about him and Elizabeta? What about my deal?"

"How much does he owe her? I'll pay that."

"Ugh. You unbelievable. Are you kidding me right now? What got into your head, dude? Fucking, pity pills?"

"Stop it. I'm in no mood for your bluff."

Sidney has stopped him, directly pointing her gun against his chest. "Oh you think I'm bluffing. Listen, tough guy. You—"

"You said not to kill him. I did what you want and you're confuse. So yes, you're definitely bluffing." Niko slapped away her hand and indifferently walked down the stairs.

Shit. Even the stairs had turned unto some soggy grass downhill. He didn't like it. He was supposed to be at the top of a building in the middle of Holland District but every time he blinked he saw himself, dragging the young girl's body to the side of the town church, and more bodies to come. Fifty children, he remembered counting. Innocent eyes wide opened, glaring at him, screaming how could you? How could you do this to me!

Niko cried and rose his arms in defense when the young girl had jumped at him, clawing his face. Niko shook his head and opened his eyes only to see Sidney who had jumped off the stairs to cut him off.

"Dude. What's wrong with you?"

"The cops are already coming. You should leave, Sidney."

"Come with me, then. I know a shortcut."

As the siren wailed closer, he made a choice to follow the red haired woman in front of him, going along the staircase and alleyways. She turned into a corner and he soon followed, only to stop in his track. Her stature was shorter and the wavy red hair transformed into a boy cut. Niko had been following this boy who managed to escape the soldiers and ran. Niko also remembered following the boy into the a building with nowhere else to run. He remembered as the young boy stood by the wall, a weapon in hand. For a moment Niko lowered his rifle at him. The boy was going to stand his ground, screaming and shouting battle cry. The boy was going to fight him with nothing but a butcher knife. He respected his bravery, though. That alone was worth mercy. Therefore a quick death without any more pain and suffering.

"Hey."

Niko turned slightly to the girl now driving their getaway car. "What?"

"You've been awfully all over the place today, man. You said to kill, you didn't kill. You meant to follow me, you dozed out the track, a couple of times." Sidney indicated. "Something's not right witchu, dude."

"Whatever."

"The fact that I lost good money because of you make this my business too. Tell we what's going on, dude?"

"I didn't kill Clarence. You didn't lose anything."

"Clarence is scared of you more than he is of me now. That means I lost him."

"Well that's not my concern, is it?" Niko said mockingly. "Why do you care what I feel anyway."

"Ah so you feel something. Tsk, you're human after all."

"What's that suppose to mean!"

"Whoa, chill. Jesus Christ, calm your ass. No need to scream and shout, dude." Sidney frowned at the sudden outburst coming from him.

"Sorry."

"Sheesh you one weird sumbitch." Sidney shook her head. "You know, bottling up emotion is never a good thing. It'll make your head thinking out of the sense."

"What are you, a psychologist?"

"How about a friend? I-I mean, we cool, right?" she offered suddenly and he glanced off.

"I don't need friends."

"Of course you do. You need a lot of friend in our line of work."

He cracked a heavy laugh. "Too many friends isn't good. Some people might stab you in the back. I don't need one more people to watch over."

"Hmm true." The corner of her lips twitched slightly. "But are you going to stab me in the back?"

"Ask the girl who put a gun at the back on my head."

"You know, Elizabeta ordered me to kill you once you gone rogue. Should've killed you back then."

"But you didn't." He called her out. "Why is that?"

"I dunno—hey wanna grab a bite? Some take out? A pizza maybe?"

"Sidney. Why didn't you kill me?"

Niko watched her closely. Aside of a joke to get to her nerves, he was in fact curious. He just realize now she had every chance to kill him. There were times she had successfully been sneaking up on him. From that time at the dock and at the parking lot at the Triangle Club. Heck, all this time she might have been watching him from roof to roof with her damn sniper. Either she was really stealth or he was just careless, who knew. Whatever it was, she didn't kill him.

Instead of a direct answer, she just shrugged one shoulder. "Clarence, retarded as he is, Lizzy trusts him to reign the district. I know you didn't realize what you doing but your gig got our people cornered. And as a, you know, hit-woman, it's my responsibility to take out the threat." She told him slowly. "As soon as I saw you down there shooting the gang members, I knew I need to kill you. But… I don't know, I just didn't."

Sidney let out a brief sigh and a chuckle. "You let him live. I let you live. Maybe we are destined together."

"Whatever." He shook his head, smirking a little.

…

"You neber'o me vat you wuh dewin in de bidding." Niko said, munching over the pizza.

Sidney snickered. "I that how you talk to a woman? Geez, you sound like Badman just now. Empty your mouth before you speak, goddammit."

"What were you doing in the building? What deal were you having with Clarence anyway?" he repeated after chugging some soda.

"He's been taking margins over his agreement for himself. That's why he owes her money."

"And where were you when I… you know, raiding the place?"

"Oh I was upstairs in a room, just chilling. Shit; you really gave a spin for the boys there. They were frantic, calling you psycho and all."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"How did you manage to do stuff like that? Going berserk like that? How do you know things would turn well?"

"I dunno. I never thought of worst possible outcome. I see a goal, I chase for it."

"In our line of work, the worst possible outcome is either death or prison. You aren't worried?"

"Nope."

"At all?"

"No. I really don't care if I live or die. I just want it to end."

"See, that's the million dollar question, Niko," she said, pausing a bite into her food. "When is it gonna end? That's the question we all been asking ourselves. Sure is."

"I guess so." Niko nodded and suddenly the night sky was more interesting to look at. Funny, she was right all along. For so many years now, he lives with a hole in his life. A puzzle that was missing. He wanted a clue or answer or something to resolve the confusion and frustration he held all those time. He had been asking himself that. The same question lurking inside him, eating him slowly.

When is the killing going to end?

When is the anger and pain and suffering going to end?

When is the loss and guilt going to end?

Florian, Darko, when is all going to end?

"Hey. Can I ask you something?"

Sidney's question woke him up. He diverted his mind to her, the woman next to him. "You just did."

"Okay, let me rephrase – I wanna ask you a question."

"What's it?"

"On the rooftop, at the stairs… you-you acted like I'mma eat you alive or something. You look at me so strange."

Niko frowned at the question. "You startled me, that's all."

"But why? You don't look like the startling type to be honest. This is the first, even for you I think."

"Says you who skipped all the way down like you're some sort of monkey. Of course I'll be surprised by that."

He mentally wished she would stop with the questioning. Just like he wished the young girl who laid lifelessly on the hood of the car, eyes staring straight at him, gone. He took a really deep breath and shifter his seat, slowly open his eyes to see the girl had perished, for now.

He secretly thanked Sidney when she didn't press and went on to another question.

"O…kay, when did you start doing this lifestyle then?" she asked slowly. "I was wondering since I can see you've had decent experience. Like, where did you learn guns and stuff? I just want to know, that's all."

"It's been some time ago. It's the only thing I know, I guess."

"What do you mean?"

Niko hummed, unsure if it would be best to share a little bit of his story. For all he knew, this was her digging up information about him. And if sensitive information spread out to the hand of bad guys, the same mistake would be redo all over again. "Let's just say I don't have pretty story to begin with."

Sidney nodded accordingly. "Don't we all?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Are you going to finish this? I should've bought the smaller size. I'm already full." She said, nudging him to take a piece of the pizza. "Maybe you wanna take them home?"

"No thanks." When he declined, she simply closed back pizza box and tossed it to the back seat. "Oh shit, I messed up."

He turned around to see the fell from the seat and pieces of pizza had fallen out. He couldn't help but shook his head. This reminded him at that day after the ambush to the small town, he and his crewmates were craving for food and the military pizza wasn't so great to begin with, he had to toss it away after just two bites. Instead, he ate some sandwiches he found at one of the raided houses.

Thirteen years ago, that day was today.