Monday

Monday came and Operation Swear jar began in earnest. Hawk was pleaseantly surprised that no one cursed the whole day. However, he was a smart man and he knew that it wouldn't last long. It was just a matter of when...

Tuesday

"WHICH ONE OF YEW GAWDD@#N SONSA B#@%HES THAWT IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO PAINT MAH RIFLE HAWT PINK!!! AH SWEAR TO GAWD AH WILL PT YEW YAHOOS UNTIL YEW F$#KING PUKE YOUR GUTS OUT!!!" Beach Head's angry Alabama roar could be heard all over the Pit. Before he could restart his tirade he heard the tell tale "DING!" of his phone.

"Whut the?" he said as he checked his notifications.

SGT. MAJOR BEACH HEAD YOU OWE 3 DOLLARS TO THE SWEAR JAR.

"Yew gotta be s@%tting me." he muttered.

"DING!" said the phone.

SGT. MAJOR BEACH HEAD YOU OWE 4 DOLLARS TO THE SWEAR JAR.

"F#@K YEW MAINFRAME!" Beach Head screamed, "GAWDD%#N YEW TO F%KIN' HELL!"

"DING!"

SGT. MAJOR BEACH HEAD YOU OWE 7 DOLLARS TO THE SWEAR JAR.

"ARRRGGGHHH!!!" he screamed in frustration.

Meanwhile, Leatherneck and Wet Suit were on guard duty in the watchtower. They couldn't help but laugh at Beach Head's rage. "I knew Beach would be the first to start cussin'." chuckled Leatherneck. "Jarhead, I think the whole base saw that comin' from a mile away." Snickered Wet Suit as they turned their attention back to the perimeter

Thursday

Alpine and Bazooka were in the middle of target practice. "Yo Bazook, you gotta chance to beat your rocket range record."

Alpine said. "Yup." said Bazooka as he popped his gum. The H.I.S.S. tank target drones drove out in various formations and speeds. Bazooka quickly fired and reloaded his launcher. He repeated his actions as he ran through the area, using the tried and trusted "shoot 'n scoot" method. There was just one target to go as he finished off a drone. Bazooka ran while aiming at the drone when he tripped on a rock. This caused him to accidentally pull the trigger as he fell, and the rocket left the barrel with a loud "FWOOSHHH!" The rocket missed the drone and slammed into the hill. "Ooh tough s#%t man." said Alpine. "D@%n" Bazooka groaned.

"DING!" "DING!" signaled their phones. "Aww man! I forgot about that swear jar!" Alpine said.

Friday

Duke was in his quarters finishing his morning stretch. He glanced at the clock noted the time and headed to Flint's office to relieve him of his command shift. He rapped at the door and heard his friend yell, "IT'S OPEN!" He entered and greeted Flint. "Hey Duke, ready to start?" "Yeah, Just as soon as I get some breakfast in me." he said. The two men headed to the mess hall.

Suddenly, they heard the intercom crackle to life. "ALL AVAILABLE M.P.S TO THE MESS HALL! ALL AVAILABLE M.P.S TO THE MESS HALL IMMEDIATLEY!" Breaker shouted.

Duke and Flint looked at each other and ran for the mess hall.

It was the foodfight to end all foodfights! Rock 'n Roll and Footloose had turned over a table and were throwing milk cartons while Slipstream and Grunt were chucking bacon at some greenshirts, who in turn were throwing pancakes. Mutt and Law came in yelling and whistling and started pulling people apart and attempting to restore order.

"EVERYBODY F#%KING FREEZE!" Law barked. Mutt pulled a greenshirt away from a tray of food as he yelled, "DON'T MAKE ME CALL THE DOGS IN HERE, D%#N IT!"

"ATTENT-HUT!", bellowed Duke. The foodfight came to a halt as every man and woman in the mess hall snapped to attention.

Duke and Flint looked very scary, even as they were covered in milk, bacon bits, and disentegrated pancake. The only sound that could be heard was the sound of cell phones protesting every obscenity that had been yelled in the past ten minutes. "Does anyone want to tell me what the f@#k has gotten into you people?", Duke snarled through gritted teeth while ignoring the buzz of his phone. No one dared say a word.

"You people should be ashamed of yourselves, throwing food like a bunch of 8-year-olds.", added flint. "I want this entire mess hall cleaned up from floor to ceiling by dinner." Said Duke, "Furthermore, you are all on latrine duty for the rest of the week. IS THAT CLEAR??!!"

YES, FIRST SERGEANT!!!", replied the offenders.

"Mutt, Law, make sure that these dumb$#es don't leave until it's clean.", ordered Flint as he stalked towards his quarters. "Yes Warrant Officer." they responded. After a few minutes, Law realized something.

"Aw mierda! I forgot that about that d%n swear jar!!!"

The foodfight is based on a real food fight at my high school during 9th grade year. I did

NOT participate in it but it sure was funny!

Next chapter by end of week!