"Yes! Finally! The break is over!" Pit suddenly cheered like he hasn't talked in about two months. He yanked his arm out of Palutena's iron grip and began dancing around the other three. "Yes! The haitus has passed! Ha ha ha!" Pit threw his halo-thingy into the air like a graduation cap and began doing his excuse of twerking.
Palutena was taken back by the shakin', but only a little. She soon began giggling at her angel's little boggy, but it soon broke out into a full out laugh, complete with gasping and snorting. She reached over, picked Pit up, and as she held him by the waist she spun him around like a little child. Pit laughed like one, too.
Even Master Hand was happy I've stopped being lazy. He rushed over to the dinning room and yanked open the doors. He then exclaimed to the Smashers inside (all the Bowser kids, who were playing poker) that the haitus was finally, finally over. After about five minutes of telling them no, he wasn't lying this time, the kids cheered and cried tears of joy. This was loud enough for all the other Smashers to hear from all over the mansion. They all came running in and saw all the happiness. They quickly concluded what this meant, and began cheering and crying and dancing.
Falco and King Dedede squawked in joy like the birds they were. Ike grabbed Zelda and broke the Guinness World Record of longest bear hug. Browser gather his children and they all began doing a conga line, which a drunken Snake and Bayonetta (yes, she's still here) joined in. Pichu was so happy he just zoomed about, running into people and electrify them. Peach and Rosalina stood against a wall and clapped their hands and cheered. Sonic, Shulk, Greninja, and Mega Man broke out a dance route the four created themselves, which involved way too much foot stomping. Captain Falcon and Pac-Man for some reason raised their hands in the air in perfect sync and waved them around like they just don't care. Squirtle literally jumped off the walls, splashing water everywhere. Wii Fit grabbed one of the poor excuses of furniture, found Robin, and the two lit the-
"HELLO?!"
They all stopped celebrating and looked over to the yelling. There stood Ryu, standing strong and breathing hard. The first three forgot about him for awhile there, while everyone else didn't notice him until now. But now that they have, they were quite curious.
"Oh, hey!" said Shulk as he began to take off his shoes because his feet were sore from all the stomping. "You're the new guy. Yeah, I foresaw you coming today. Welcome and stuff to-"
"Enough!" screamed Ryu.
Half of the Smashers were taken back by that sudden outburst, the other half were just confused. -Well, except Shulk. "I foresaw that, too." Shulk insured no one.
"What is this?!" he cried, motioning to all of them. "What are!... What can!... What? WHAT? WHAT?!"
"Quite the poet, this one." Samus joked, who was just about to toss Fox through a window out of happiness.
"This place is nuts! You ALL are nuts! You know that?!"
"Last I checked," "Speak for yourself." "BEEEEEEEP! BEEP BEEEEEEEP!" "Welcome to my world!" "Is this a intervention?" was the responds he got shot back at him.
Ryu squeezed his eyes shut so hard that he could feel his eyebrows cement into a permanent scowl. He took a deep breath, then screamed, "You're mansion is on the right of knock-off Detroit and the left of no where! I've seen dark allies that would make better places to live in than this dump! One minute you're having a civil conversation, next you break out in a flash mob, complete with wounds and enough noise to break a sound barrier! You all must of just rolled in from stupid town!... Or Rondomville... Or Crazy Town!... Or- oh, you get what I mean! Practically all of you are nuts! Nuts, I tell you, nuts!"
They all took that reality check and swallowed. Sure, it was over-the-top, but in a sense, kind of true. Which was why nobody spoke for a few seconds. Guilt silence.
Finally, Palutena broke the silence. "Well, that's Pit's fault as well." she uttered.
"Palutenaaaaaaaaaaa!" Pit once-again groaned like a child.
"No! Let her talk!" Ryu turned to the angel and snapped at him. "She's one of the few sane ones. Let her shine some light on this."
Wolf chucked at that remark. "Heh heh. He said 'shine'," the space animal said.
"Let her talk," Ryu repeated, not understanding the reference.
"Well, listen." Palutena began.
"You know I hate doing what I'm told!" Ganondorf called out.
Ryu, of course, heard that. He turned to Ganondorf, stomped over to him, picked him up with one hand, and threw him at Wolf. The furry was knocked down like a bowling pin by the... well, whatever Ganondork is classified as, and the two splatted onto the floor. Now that was a mess Wendy wouldn't touch even if you promised to pay her with Red Bull wings.
"Let. Her. Talk." Ryu hissed at them all.
There was one synchronized *GLUMP*, then everyone and thing went completely silent.
Ryu smiled at what he accomplished. "Go on, Palutena." he said as he turned to her.
The lady was taken back by those actions, but only a little. She was use to men being driven insane by her presents. "Well, it's actually quite simple." she told him. "One day Pit got cocky and destroyed the four wall with asking the reader questions and such. One of the questions was about our rating, and it turned out we've been a K+ fanfic for far too long. Our writer use feedback like that to improve, like bump us up to TEEN and beginning to be more descriptive. But the good, came with the bad. She decided to use her new writing techniques to send four of our least-insane members and Mario to some jungle in a different realm and describe this mansion as a total trash heap. And that TEEN rating: At first it was great because now we had freedom to do... Things." (She looked over at two of our three power couples so far: Ike & Zelda and Snake & Bayonetta. The four dodged the lady's eyes and wiped their brows.) "But soon it went horrible, with almost everyone old enough to drink making utter fools of themselves, cigarette buds ruining the carpet, and Greninja selling 'grass types' in the halls. So yeah, I enjoy blaming Pit for it, but in reality it's our writers fault."
Hey! No fair!
"Well, it's true." Palutena shrugged.
"Actually, that makes sense." Ryu said as he groomed his invisible beard. "Yeah, it all makes sense now... No wonder everyone is nuts!"
"And you're no different," Falco pointed out.
"True." agreed Ryu. "But, hey! It's not my fault! It's BraveMerida's!"
"YEAH!" they all cheered.
...This is one of the reasons I took two months off...
"Oh, really?" Wario asked. "I figured it's because you love attention, but the reviews have slowed down."
Heck no. I just needed a break because school was starting back up and stuff. Who made you my therapist?
"That's actual up to you," answered Lucario. "In fact, you could have a Mii fighter of you join us if you wanted to and have Wario mentor you. -But, in reality, you'll be mentoring yourself."
Ugh, no. I'm completely above egotistical things like that.
"...She said while writing a chapter about typing to herself." retorted Marth.
Very funny. Now, listen here, you face kickers-
"Do we have a choice?" asked Luigi.
Of course not. Now, listen up real well, because I'm only gonna type this once: I understand why you all would be negative about your situation. Well, of course I understand! -But anyhoo, back on subject. Now, may I ask all a question?
"Do we have a choice?" Roy asked now.
Good point. I should stop asking such ridiculous questions.
"So?" asked Popo.
Of course not! Okay, so obviously this place is a dump. Do you all deserver it? Probably. I'm looking at you Bowser. But nevertheless, I guess I've gone a little too far on the dumpiness. Just a tad. But I have learned my lesson. -Actually, no. I'm just tired of the mansion being crap. So, I ask you, how may the mansion be fixed up for you Smashers? Please, suggest anything. But not getting rid of the bar; that place is comedy gold, I'm keeping that in whether y'all like it or not.
"Hmmmm..." muttered Mega Man as he thought. "How about a charging station? You know, for electronics?"
Well, I would say yes if you and Samus weren't probably the only two who would use it.
"Understandable," Samus agreed.
"Cotton Candy Machine! COTTON CANDY MACHINE! COTTON CANDY MACHINE!" Bowser's kids chanted at the top of their voices.
Okay... Yeah. I can do that. I'll have it installed as soon as the plot allows it.
"Oh, come on!" exclaimed Larry.
"I hate waiting!" Bowser Jr. whined as he swung his hammer around.
Ugh, why didn't I change your personality?...
"What yo talking about, brooooooo?" boomed Fox from the leash he was on. (Yup. He's on a leash now. I just had to.)
Okay, never mind. Anything else, peasants?
"A chocolate waterfall in the dinning room!" exclaimed Ash.
Yeah. Not happening.
"A yoga room," said Wii Fit.
Use your own stage.
"Make them stop using my vacuum without-a asking!" cried Luigi.
Whoa. They do that? Wow. Why didn't I write that sooner? Oh, right. Like most things in this fanfic, it doesn't move along the plot in the slightest.
"What are you talking about?" asked Bayonetta, who was keeping Drunk Snake on his feet but not really well.
Sweetie, you're a living example of what I talking about. Anyway, about the Luigi's vacuum. Yeah, so, you guys just leave it alone, okay? Don't make me punish you all for not listen. But I'm not above punishment. If y'all disobey, I'll have the dining room roof ripped off again.
"OH, COME ON!" roared Bowser.
Oh, please, Bowser. You're not in a position to complain; I just fixed up your room. Now, any other request?
"Yeah." said Master Hand, with a hint of annoyance in his voice. "You quit with these pointless rambling chapters and get on with the main plot."
Sure. Why not?
Poof! Suddenly, right out of thin air, Young Link appeared!
"Whoa!" exclaimed Master. "Gee, thanks!"
Yeah, yeah. Don't mention it. Oh, just so you know you, Master Hand, if you didn't have asked me to move things along I would've just had you all ask me random questions for the next four chapters.
"Really?"
PFFT. No.
"Oh. Well, I wouldn't have put it pass you..."
Young Link, on the other hand, stood there. He looked a little intimidated by the fact all the Smashers were burning holes into him with their eyes. He just look down at the ocarina and studied it as he flipped it over and over in his hands. He looked somewhat sad, like a little boy who just lost his friends in- Oh, gosh, I left them in Termina. Cruuuud.
Young Link! I'm so, so, so sorry! I didn't mean to forget you all! I just wanted to give one of the mute characters a chapter. Then they announced Ryu coming, one thing lead to another... Yeah. Sorry for stranding you guys for over three months.
"That still doesn't explain why you left the others there," Young Link answered back.
Oh, yeah. That's going to help the plot along. Duh. Now, let me write you.
Young Link sighed, put his instrument in one of his pockets, then exclaimed, "Everyone! Listen up! I need your help!"
"Whoa," said Pac-Man. "What happen to him being like a sad little boy?"
THAT was uncharacteristic. He's actually very daring and brave. At least, I mold him to be.
"What?" asked Ryu.
Never mind.
Young Link made a face at me, then continued. "Alright! First off, everyone, I didn't lose them; they lost me. And second, I know where they are, I just need some of your help getting them back. Three of you, to be exact. Now, who wants to volunteers?!"
He stood there with his arms wide open, ready to take whoever volunteers with open arms. But, naturally, no one was interested. They were all going to be too busy Retweeting Star Wars tonight to go on some other-dimension quest. They instead just stood there, burning holes into him with their eyes, waiting for him to stop hoping and just break out crying. Gosh, why have I molded like this? Besides comedy reasons, of course.
Looks like I'll have to pick the victims. Okay, listen up, all you chicken legs, I'm going-
"Oh, no you don't." interrupted Master Hand, using his voice of reason. "I believe picking creatures for unpleasant duties is my thing."
Oh, right! How foolish of me. I'll just let you have the joy of choosing what happens. Oh, and while you do that, I'll go organize my Garfield Fat-Cat collection, paint the roof of my mom's UFO, and iron my shoes.
"Your family has a limo?!" exclaimed Ness.
Hahahaha. Of course not. I was being sarcastic. As always.
"Oh." Ness mumbled.
"How about the Garfield collection?" asked Peach.
...Um...
Master Hand shook his... well, himself. "Not important," he said. "Now, quit trying to steal my thunder and let me pick our lucky victim!"
Hey! No! I'm the writer, so I'M going to chose what happens! So, I chose that I PICK THE VOLUNTEERS.
"You can't dot that!"
I JUST SAID I CAN. SO SUCK IT.
"You both know this argument is going to get us nowhere, right." Sonic just came out ad asked.
Palutena agreed with this. "Not to mention it makes little to no sense."
Okay. That's it. This chapter is already 2 chapters long anyway. I'll just cut you a deal, Master Hand. You let me personally pick who helps Young Link, and I promise to never do this again.
"Define 'this'," he demanded.
This. Ya know, come right out and talk to you all as ridiculously as this. Palutena's right, this kinda does make no sense. Yet, at the same time, it kinda does... Hm...
Master Hand thought it over. "Okay, deal!" he exclaimed. "But choose quick; before I change my mind."
You got it! Okay! Ryu, Marth, and Peach, go help Young Link!
"Excuse me?" "What?!" "But then I'll miss The Muppets!" is the reactions they gave out.
"Yay! Finally! So help!" Young Link declared as he embraced the three.
"Oh, great." mumbled Ryu. "Now I'll definitely go nuts like all of you."
I know. Ain't it great?
"Okay! No time to lose! Let's go!"
Young Link pulled out his ocarina and began to play it. The melody he played this time kinda sounded like something from Grease. Strange.
Poof! And, once again, they were off!
I'll try to never do that again.
Heyo, amigos! Sorry that took forever. I really have to up my game, don't I? Heheheheh... That wasn't a joke... Heheh...
Okay, listen. I really hope that whole 'me exploding the four wall' thing made at least a ounce of sense. I just felt like, I don't know, doing something different. Being ever more ridiculous than usual. Yeah, I didn't know it was possible, either. HORRAY FOR ME! YAAY!
Enough of that. Thanks again for reading! HOORAY FOR YOU FOR READING! YAAY!
Oh, and review and stuff. I'm trying to sound ever so casual about review, but I bounce around whenever I get a new one. So please review! YAAY!