Chapter 2

Edogawa Ranpo sat in the office, munching on his favourite sweets happily. Suddenly he heard hurried footsteps and the Agency's entrance door flung open, revealing a very panicked and horrified Dazai with a confused child in his arms.

Dazai ran towards Ranpo and said in a very shocked and terrified tone

"He— He is a CHILD!"

"Mmn? Hai hai, I see you have an adorable little child with you Dazai" Ranpo said casually, still happily munching.

"No, you don't get it. Ranpo san. He is a child" Dazai repeated, unable to string words together properly.

"Hm? I know he is a child. Why are you so shocked though? Is he yours?" Ranpo asked, not looking at the child *intentionally*. Dazai's panic face was a super rare sight, little Chuuya could wait a few more minutes.

"Wha— NO! Ranpo san! He is chibi! Chi—"

"Dazai san has a child?!"

Atsushi, who had just entered the room, exclaimed. He ran over to the horrified adult.

"Dazai san, Congratulations! I didn't know you were married tho, but who cares. It's a day of celebration! Dazai san became a father" Atsushi said, practically radiating happiness.

"No—"

"What did you say Atsushi? Dazai is a father now? Good for him. He would be too busy to try his idiotic suicide attempts now"

"Atsushi kun, When did you teleport there?" Dazai exclaimed . The white haired boy, who was standing in front of him a few seconds ago was now on the other side of the room, telling everyone about the 'good news'.

Everyone gathered round to congratulate their obviously horrified co worker.

"Dazai san congratulations! I can't wait for nii san to become a father too. Kyaah! I'll spoil the kid rotten"
"Congratulations Dazai san. Is the kid a boy or a girl?"
"You didn't bring your wife to me for regular checkups?"
"Why do you look so horrified though?"

"Listen to me first!"

"So you mean to say that this kid is Nakahara Chuuya? Are you sure?" Kunikida asked for the umpteenth time

"I'm positive"

"How can you be so sure though Dazai san? What if he is just someone related to Chuuya san"

"At-su-shi-Kun, look at him!" Dazai said, holding little chuuya diretly in front of Atushi's face "He's a carbon copy of that chibi, just a lot cuter"

"Dazai san, are you okay? You're way too freaked out"

"I'm fine Atsushi kun. I assure you that this is Chuuya and not someone else" Dazai said, regaining his usual composure.

"But I wonder how this happened to him?"

"An ability hit him, what else?" Ranpo san spoke up, chewing on his chocolate pocky

"Oh." Atsushi looked back at Chuuya "Do you remember your name, little one?

This question followed Chuuya's little foot making contact with Atsushi's face

"Of coulsh I lemebwer my name, what kind of silly kwestion iz that? Ale you dumb?"

Dazai laughed loudly

"Side effects of typical asian parentin— OW!"

Little Chuuya had removed his foot from Atsushi's face and punched Dazai on the face instead.

"Put me down you washte of bwangages!" he said squirming

'Wow, he remembers his insults for Dazai, what a terrifying bond' Everyone sweatdropped. Dazai, on the other hand, grabbed Chuuya by the collar (obviously annoyed) and said

"Just because you are chibier than before doesn't mean you become bratier too, you little brat. Want me to smack YOU? I swear if you do that again, I will smack you."

Bad decision Dazai.

Chuuya stared at Dazai, his eyes wide with fear and tears. He sniffled and fat tears leaked from his eyes. He shrieked, his high pitch voice making everyone go almost deaf. Dazai was taken aback as he realized his mistake

"I—uhhhh...I d-didn't mean that. Oi! Stop crying! Please" he said, panicking. Little Chuuya was crying and and he didn't like it, not one bit. Mostly the annoying shrill voice. It was driving him insane.

"Dazai, shut this thing up! I'm gonna end up deaf"

"What's all this noise?" The President, Fukuzawa Yukichi, entered the office upon hearing the commotion

"Shachou!" they all exclaimed and ran towards their president, each of them looking equally helpless.

"Shachou—This kid started crying—"
"He won't stop—"
"Can you do something about it?"
"It's giving me a headache"

Fukurawa sighed and took the crying child from Dazai and rocked him, placing his head on his chest. After a while, Chuuya calmed down.

"Alright, there we go. Now don't make him cry again" he said as he tried to put Chuuya down. Chuuya grabbed Fukuzawa's yukata and refused to let go.

"Oh dear, I have no choice, do I?" He said, adjusting Chuuya so that he felt comfortable. Ranpo stared at the two "More importantly, what's a child doing here? Where are his parents?"

"Shachou, that's Nakahara Chuuya" Ranpo said.

They explained him about how Dazai found Chuuya in the street and bought him to the Agency

"Hmm.. so which one of you is going to take care of him?" Fukuzawa asked
"Huh? We'll take care of him? Shouldn't we just give him to port mafia? I mean they wouldn't like their member living with one of us" Naomi said, worried
"Give a child to port mafia? Are you serious? It would have been different if he remembered everything. We will not give him back until he turns back normal. So back to my question, who will take care of him?"

Silence

"If no one speaks up I'll have to assign randomly"

Silence

"Well Dazai is the one who brought him here so he should take care oh him" Ranpo said, returning to his table to grab some more chocolate pocky.

"Huh?"

"I agree, since Dazai has the most experience dealing with Nakahara san" Kunikida added

"Huh?"

"Uh huh, and I think the child has taken a liking to him too." Naomi added. Everyone agreed

"Now wAiT jUsT a MiNutE, I think Atsushi kun would be better, don't you agree?" Dazai said nervously. Take care of this little brat? Hell no, he wasn't taking on this job. Nuh-uh.

"No, it would be best if he stays with Dazai" Fukuzawa said "It's decided then. Now Chuuya, go to Dazai, okay?"

Chuuya nodded. He finally let go of Fukuzawa and went to Dazai. Everyone sighed in relief at the fact that they didn't have to look him

"Shachou~" Ranpo called

Fukuzawa looked at Ranpo. He had his arms spread out like a little kid wanting ups. Fukuzawa's eye twitched.

"Ranpo, you know you aren't a kid anymore"
"I know"
"Then what's the meaning of this?"

Ranpo just stared at Fukuzawa expectantly, not budging from his place. Fuzukawa sighed in defeat for the second time today and picked Ranpo up the same way as he had picked little Chuuya.

"Oh and Dazai, Make sure you take good care of Nakahara kun"

"Hai Shachou"