WARNING: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS SUGGESTIVE CONTENT AND INTERNALIZED ACEPHOBIA!

Title Song: "Love of My Life" by Queen

Everything was ready. The dining table was set for two. Alastor had mended all the rips in his tailcoat. Just as he was lighting the candelabrum in the center of the table, his shadow pointed at the clock. The hour was seven.

"She's not late yet," Alastor said as he extinguished the match. "She'll be here any minute now."

The big hand ticked to the next minute. He wrung his hands together.

"Yes, it…it'll be fine. So what if she didn't show up to the last dinner? Or the one before that? Or…the one…ten years ago."

Beads of sweat dripped down his forehead as he recentered the candelabrum. Then he readjusted the placement of the silverware. And the wine glasses. And the bowls.

Why did he have to go and make another deal with Lucifer? Now the Radio Demon was bound to two bargains requiring him to sire an infant. The Devil might grow impatient if his future devil-child—his idea of a godchild—never came into existence.

As if Alastor wasn't already pressured enough.

Another tick.

"What's taking her so long?" He paced the room in agitation. "I said seven, didn't I? Maybe that clock is fast, or hers is slow. Yes, that's it. She wouldn't stand me up. Again."

He stopped and gazed down at his shaking hands. "No. Not…not again."

Then came a light knock at the door. Alastor straightened up. Chesterfield applauded.

"What are you still standing there for, fool?" the Radio Demon hissed. "Give us some privacy!"

If things went well tonight, he couldn't have any peepers.

As his shadow floated off, Alastor stepped up to the door. He licked his palm and smoothed out his hair and jacket. Then he put on his biggest smile and opened the door.

Not only was his lovely wife standing there, but she had changed out of her business dress into a lavender, shoulder-less evening gown, her brooch pinned in the center of her chest. The features of her face were highlighted with black lipstick and mascara. Her fluffy hair was pinned up in a sophisticated bun.

Alastor gave a breath of awe as he took in the sight. "You came."

"Y-Yeah." Tina rubbed her arm. "I don't believe it either."

He opened the door all the way and bowed. "Entrez, madame."

She stepped into the room dimly lit by candlelight. Vases of lilies decorated each little table. Slow jazz played from a gramophone in the corner.

"Just a business dinner, huh?" Tina muttered.

Alastor smirked as he shut the door behind her. "I didn't ask you to doll yourself up."

"Blame Angel." She turned and looked him over. "What happened to the stiches in your suit?"

"They disappeared along with my sorrow, now that you're here." Placing a hand on her back, he guided her to the dining table. "I hope you've brought your appetite with you, darling."

Tina eyed the two bowls of food. "Jambalaya. Why am I not surprised?"

"Oh, dear. Was that too predictable, dear?" While his tone was casual, he was genuinely nervous. "I can switch it out for something else."

"No, no. It's fine. Your, uh…" She bit her lip. "Jambalaya's fine."

Alastor hastened to pull out one of the chairs. On the right side of the table's head. Precisely where she used to sit at the manor.

With an awkward smile, Tina lowered herself into the seat. Ever the gentleman, Alastor pushed the chair back in to catch her.

"Drink?" He snapped his fingers and a bottle appeared in his hand.

"Al," she warned. "We're sober now, remember?"

"Yes, yes, I'm aware." He poured a fizzy golden liquid into her glass. "It's sparkling champagne. No alcohol whatsoever."

"Oh. How…thoughtful of you."

When is he anything but?

After filling both glasses, he took his seat at the head of the table. Then he raised his drink.

"To new beginnings."

Not knowing how else to respond, Tina picked up her glass and clinked it with his. While he took a sip, she gulped her drink down as if it were real champagne.

Alastor chuckled. "Still the quickest guzzler in all of Hell."

She set her glass down. "Don't tell me that's another reason you married me."

He shrugged. "It captured my interest, I'll admit. Most women I knew were very dainty drinkers."

She crossed her arms. "You sayin' I ain't dainty?"

"Oh, don't be offended, dear." He leaned onto his palm as he topped off her glass. "I've always found your unabashed rudeness quite charming."

Tina wanted to retort, but then remembered some advice Angel had given her during the makeover: "If he compliments ya, don't disagree with him, okay? Even if it sounds weird, just go with it."

So she shut herself up by downing her second drink. It was a good thing this was non-alcoholic, otherwise she'd be getting tipsy at this point.

"You know," she said, examining the empty glass. "If we served this at the party, it'd be a good substitute for all our alcoholics." She smirked. "Be real funny if we passed this off as real champagne and they'd all be stickin' to sobriety without even knowin' it."

"As entertaining as that idea is, dear," Alastor said, placing his palm atop her glass and lowering it, "could we please not discuss work right now?"

Tina frowned. "But don't ya think—?"

"Ah-ah!" He pressed a finger to her lips. "Tonight is about us. So no more work talk, alright? Save that for when we're actually working."

The Radio Demon was in an assertive mood today. Which meant Tina was going to have a harder time contradicting him than usual.

And he was right. She had been focusing a lot on work lately. She could do with a break.

He'd always been there to remind her when she needed a break.

"Fine." Tina picked up the fork and took a bite of the jambalaya. It was as tasty as ever. "So what should we talk about?"

Alastor perked up as he too began eating. "I noticed you spent most of today in the spider whore's room."

She winced. "Don't call him that."

"What? It's true, isn't it?'

"Ya think ya have any right to judge him after what happened yesterday?" She stuck a big forkful into her mouth.

"Well, whatever you call him, when did you two get so…chummy?"

She swallowed. "I told ya, he's gay. He doesn't wanna fuck me."

"That didn't bother you before."

Tina sent him a death glare. "Why is this so reminiscent of when we first met?"

"You're right." He held up his hands. "I didn't invite you here so we could bicker like children."

"Then why did ya invite me?"

"Because I can't do this anymore."

She lowered her fork, which still had food on it. "Do what anymore?"

Alastor locked eyes with her. "Carry on with you like you're just another business associate. Because that's not what we are, Tina. We never were."

She opened her mouth.

"And no." He pointed his fork at her. "We were never 'just friends' either. Like it or not, Tina, we are, and always will be, husband and wife. Even if we're not living together. Even if you prefer another's company. I have been more than accommodating, giving you the space you so desire, but I refuse to be ignored, or pushed around. So, we are here to share a nice dinner together, alone, without any outside interference. And you will answer any questions I have, truthfully, and you will listen to all I have to say, without argument. Do I make myself clear?"

By the tone of his voice, one could easily interpret this as a threat. But Tina knew this was just Alastor being firm.

Contrary to what Angel Dust had thought, there would be no "simping" tonight. At least on Alastor's end.

Tina, on the other hand, could feel the heat rising to her cheeks as she nodded.

"Splendid!" Alastor took another bite. "Now, in regard to what you said about loving me too—"

"Can we start with a less complicated question?" she asked.

"Hmm." The corners of his mouth dropped an inch. "Very well." His eyes landed on her left hand. "Why don't you wear your rings anymore?"

She hid her hand beneath the table. "That's…not exactly the sort of question I had in mind."

"Well it's the question I'm asking. Why don't you wear them?"

He wasn't letting her escape this time. He wanted answers, and he wanted them now.

Alastor's tone changed from demanding to melancholy. "Are you ashamed of me?"

"No," she replied quickly. "No, it…it's not that. I just…" She shook her head. "You're one to talk. Angel tells me he never saw your ring before I arrived."

"Only because people asked too many questions I didn't feel like answering." He stared at the black ring on his finger. "Still, I couldn't bear to part with it, so I wore it under my glove. Against my skin."

Tina touched her brooch. Should she tell him what lay inside? The static in his voice kept fading in and out. His eyes were full of longing and agony.

This was all torture for him.

No more hiding the truth. Neither of them would be able to move on if this continued.

"I didn't feel like answerin' questions either," Tina admitted, hanging her head. "But really, it was because…because…" She clutched the brooch. "Well, all the time we were together, people only knew me as the Radio Demon's wife.

"Most couldn't even remember my name. Ya have any idea how many times I've been called Mrs. Alastor or Mrs. Radio Demon? Not Tina or Mrs. Twinkle. They'd just see me and go, 'Hey, ain't you the Radio Demon's gal?' Or, 'What's it like shackin' up with the Radio Demon?' Or, 'How long does it take for ya to heal from your cannibal hubby's hickies?' 'How big is Radio Boy's dick?' 'Is he a top or a bottom?'"

She plopped her face into her hands. Alastor pulled on his collar in discomfort.

"Did…did people really ask you all that?"

Tina nodded with a groan. "It's not that I hated being associated with you. I…I liked being a part of someone else's life. Havin' someone to depend on. But…it felt like I had no real identity of my own. I didn't even hang with anyone outside your circle. Not that I don't love Husk or Niffty or Mimzy. But if your cannibal pals or business buddies were over… Well, I was pretty much just there. As your arm candy. An ornament."

She removed the brooch from her dress and turned it in her hand. "When we split up, I decided to make a name for myself. So that when people first meet me, they know me not as the Radio Demon's wife, but Tina Twinkle the Songbat. Cuz of my own accomplishments. Not somebody else's."

Alastor twiddled his thumbs. "Did it really feel like you were…living in my shadow?"

She shrugged. "It's a pretty big shadow."

Chesterfield appeared on the wall behind her and waved.

"I told you to give us some privacy!" Alastor hissed.

Tina turned just as the shadow slithered out of sight. Then the touch of Alastor's hand on hers made her face him again.

"I never meant to make you feel that way," he said. "My only thought, from that very first moment, was to protect you. As my partner, not my property. Certainly, you were mine, but I was also yours."

"I know," she murmured.

And she meant it.

He traced his thumb over her ring finger. "So, what did you do with the rings? Sell them like the rest of the jewels you took with you?"

"No, I… No."

With a sigh of defeat, Tina opened the brooch. Alastor tilted his head. He hadn't expected the jewel to be hollow. Then his eyes widened as she withdrew the two rings.

"You…" he whispered. "You kept them."

"Of course, I did," she muttered, clutching the rings in her hands.

And she'd worn them. Concealed, but close to her heart.

"Why?" he asked.

The ruby from the engagement ring poked between her fingers. "In case I…needed you again."

"Oh."

His ears drooped in disappointment. He supposed it would've been unwise for anyone to throw away a gem with the power to summon an Overlord at will. Then his ears perked up in realization.

"Have you been…using that ring to tap into my powers?"

She covered the ruby. "Not on purpose. It first happened when I was singin' onstage, and I noticed something odd about my audience. Like they were more into me than usual. When I saw this ring was glowing, I figured it had something to do with the charm ya put in it."

"Interesting." He rubbed his chin. "That charm was only meant to allow you to summon me. Not grant you some of my powers."

"Maybe ya did it by accident?"

"Hmm." He held out his hand. "May I see it for a moment?"

She placed the engagement ring in his palm. He raised it to his eye to examine it.

"Yes, now that I'm up close, I can sense a shred of my own magic. Though I can't fathom how… Oh. I think I know what happened."

"What?"

Alastor pointed to the inside of the ring. "The inscription."

She scrunched her nose. "What about it?"

His smile softened as he turned the ring, reading the words to himself. "Do you remember when I engraved this?"

Tina nodded. "Our sixth anniversary."

"Yes." He lowered the ring, running his finger along the ruby. "My personal favorite."

For their anniversary, they had formed a tradition. Tina would wake up to Alastor making breakfast, he'd gift her with a new pair of shoes, and then she'd play him a song on the piano.

This year, Alastor surprised her with a gondola ride through the swamp. One of the shadow minions served as the rower, allowing the couple to relax and enjoy each other's company. Tina sat on the red velvet seat, while Alastor lay stretched out beneath her, his head in her lap.

"This isn't weird for you?" she asked as she scratched between his ears.

He closed his eyes and purred. "Not when you do it, dear. Little lower please. To the left. Oh, yes. That feels nice."

Tina giggled. "Six years ago, you'd freak out over me so much as touchin' ya. And now you're lettin' me pet ya like a fuckin' cat."

"I'm a deer, dear," he said with a shiver as she massaged his shoulders. "Husk is the cat."

"You're still purring."

"Can't help it." He opened his eyes and smiled up at her. "You make me so happy, mon amour."

Reaching up, he stroked her cheek. Tina took his hand and leaned into it.

"And I don't know about you," Alastor whispered, "but this past year has been the best of my afterlife."

"Just this year? We've been together for six."

"Yes, but it's been a year since we fell in love." He brought her face down for an upside-down kiss. "And I've never been happier."

"Neither have I." She kissed his forehead. "Though…ya sure there's nothing more ya want?"

"How can I?" His fingers wove into her hair. "When I have such a perfect, beautiful, dark angel for my wife?"

It was hard to keep a straight face when he got this gushy. "That's what I mean. Everything's so good now, it's almost unbelievable. But ya know, now that we've been…intimate for such a long time, isn't there something…special you'd like to do?"

"Hmm." He caught sight of the ruby ring on her left hand. "I suppose I could turn back the clock, and give you a proper, more heartfelt proposal. In fact."

Alastor sat up and settled himself beside her, holding out his hand. "Your engagement ring, please?"

Tina raised an eyebrow as she removed it. "You're not gonna put another weird charm on it, are ya?"

"Charm, yes. But I doubt you'll consider it weird."

Once Alastor had the ring, he brought a finger to his lips and bit down. Tina had seen him do this so many times now that she wasn't concerned. Then he stuck his finger through the band and smeared its inside, all while muttering something in Creole. Glowing red Vodou symbols burned into the ring and transformed into Latin letters.

As the light died down, Alastor kissed the jewel and handed it back to Tina. "Read the inscription."

The words were so tiny, she had to hold it up to her eye and squint. "'Chaque jour je t'aime davantage…'"

As she turned the ring over, the words continued in a seemingly never-ending loop. "'…aujourd'hui plus qu'hier et bien moins que demain.'"

Then the phrase repeated. Her French had gotten much better since she'd met Alastor, but it still took her a moment to translate.

"'Each day I love you more, today more than yesterday…'"

"'…and less than tomorrow,'" Alastor finished for her. "It's from L'éternelle chanson by Rosemonde Gérard."

Tina blushed. "It's beautiful."

"It's the truth."

He took the ring and her left hand. Then he rose to his feet.

"Al, you're gonna rock the boat."

She shut up once he got down on one knee. He'd done the same thing when he first proposed. She'd felt indifferent then. But now, the sight made her heart skip a beat.

"Tina, my sweet darling," he said, sliding the ring onto her finger, "I promise to love, honor, protect, and cherish you in all the ways you deserve. I will be as much a part of you as you are of me, from here onto eternity. As long as you are by my side, I will do everything in my power to make you the happiest woman in all of Hell, just as you've already made me the happiest man. So, my love, if you don't think me silly for asking this, will you be my wife? For real?"

The answer didn't come right away. Tina was too busy sobbing.

"Oh, dear." His ears drooped. "It wasn't my intention to make you cry."

"No." She sniffed and smiled. "This…this is a good cry. And…yes."

Alastor brightened up as he slid the ring back onto her finger. Then he took her face in his hands and kissed the tears away.

"Mon amour," he murmured between pecks. "Tu as un goût salé."

Tina laughed as he said she tasted salty.

"Make up your mind, love." He licked her damp cheek. "You laughing or crying?"

"Stop!" She pushed him off. "You're such a goof!"

"Ah, but I'm your goof!" He showed off his ring. "For all eternity."

"I think what happened," Alastor said, pointing to Tina's engagement ring, "is that when I engraved this, and said the words, 'I will be as much a part of you as you are of me,' I unintentionally granted you a part of myself, and thus, shared some of my power."

"Can ya really do something like that unintentionally?" Tina asked.

He shrugged. "One has to be careful when casting a Vodou spell. Of course, I wasn't thinking of that when I made my speech. Just be grateful I didn't accidentally merge us together into one being."

She shivered at the thought. "You're not mad, are ya? That I've been usin' your powers without permission?"

"Mad? Au contraire, ma chère, I'm quite impressed. However, I am a teeny bit disappointed," he said, pinching his forefinger and thumb together, "that you didn't inform me of this sooner. I would've loved to teach you."

"Well, you could always teach me a few more tricks."

She winced at how suggestive that sounded. Alastor gave her a hopeful look.

"Do you mean…you're considering coming back to me?"

Tina shifted in her seat. "Well, I was… What I meant to say was…"

Before she could come up with a proper excuse, the music changed, and Tina's ears were hit with her own voice. Singing "Love of My Life" by Queen.

The same song she'd recorded for her husband on their sixth anniversary. He'd kept it all this time.

"Al." She facepalmed. "Ya said this wouldn't be romantic."

"I told you, dear." Alastor rose from his chair. "I cannot simply be a business partner to you. I know we made a deal to keep our distance, but I'm afraid it's impossible." He came round the table. "Especially when we both know you wouldn't have said 'I love you' if you hadn't meant it."

Tina opened her mouth.

"Don't lie to me. Please."

Her jaw quivered. Then she looked away from him and hung her head.

"Even if I did mean it, Al," she said, "I don't think…I don't think it's possible for us to be happy right now."

"And why not?" Alastor knelt to her level. "We were happy once. Why can't we be that way again? When everything was perfect?"

"Everything wasn't perfect, Al. Not even on our sixth anniversary." She met his gaze. "Or did you forget what happened later that night?"

After finishing off their anniversary with a hearty meal and a few hours of dancing in the music room, the couple returned to what was once Alastor's room, now theirs. Alastor lay in bed in his pajamas, reading a book, waiting for his wife to come out of the bathroom. The shower had stopped running ages ago.

"Everything alright in there, darling?" he called. "I know it doesn't take you that long to get into your nightgown."

"I'm, err, fine," came her weak voice.

He lowered his book. "You sound ill, sweetheart. Do you need any assistance?"

She couldn't be drunk. She'd only had two glasses of champagne at dinner.

"I ain't sick. I just…" She paused. "Al, ya know how you wanted to do something special for our anniversary this year? Well, I…wanna do something special too."

He bookmarked his page and closed it. "Well, I wish you'd said something before I got ready for bed, but so long as it doesn't take too l—"

He dropped his book just as he was placing it on the bedside table. His eyes widened at the sight in the bathroom doorway.

Tina wasn't wearing one of her nightgowns. But a red, lacey, slip, held up by spaghetti straps, cut low across her breasts, the hem just barely covering her hips.

Static crackled as Alastor blinked several times, seemingly tuning into various stations. Tina hugged herself, looking shyly down at her feet.

"Do I…really look that bad?"

After many glitching sounds, Alastor finally managed to form words. "N-No, but…" His face reddened. "W-Won't you catch a cold like that? Let me take care of that for you, dear."

A snap of his fingers, and a sheet appeared around her shoulders. Tina sighed and shrugged it off.

"I'm serious, Al. I think…" She bit her lip. "I mean…it's been so long since we've…and we're married so…don't ya think it might be time to…?"

She raised her big, pleading eyes. Alastor stiffened.

"O-Oh." His focus shifted downward. "You, err, want us to…?"

Tina nodded. "Only if…you're okay with it, of course. If not, I can go put on my nightgown, and we can just—"

"No!" The loudness of his voice surprised them both. "I mean wait. Just…let me think a moment."

The Radio Demon was at a loss. He supposed after a year of being romantic, this request of Tina's was reasonable. Yet funnily enough, the thought of going all the way with her hadn't crossed his mind. Not since the night they'd confessed.

He'd just asked her this morning if she could be his wife for real. And real husbands and wives had a certain obligation he and Tina had yet to fulfill.

What could Alastor say to her? That he'd always dreaded the thought of sex? That he'd never imagined being completely physical with a woman? Or anyone, for that matter?

He'd told her all that when they'd gotten engaged, but so much had changed since then. He'd fallen in love with her, hadn't he?

But what if that explanation hit differently now that they were married, and she wanted him? Tina might be offended if he claimed to love her, but didn't desire to make love to her.

Not to mention he had no idea how. Yes, he was aware of what physically needed to be done, but how to get his equipment up and running was another matter. The thing sprang to life at the most unexpected moments. He could be washing the dishes or listening to music and then feel the sudden, unwanted urge to relieve himself. He had no control over it.

"Al? You okay?"

Alastor blinked back to the present. Tina now stood at his side.

Contrary to his discomforting thoughts, she did look beautiful in that negligee. It hugged her curves, and the red complemented her golden-brown fur.

There was no doubt of his attraction to her. He could stare at her in that outfit all night. But with no inclination to remove it.

"I get if you're nervous." She sat on the edge of the bed. "I was my first time too. But…I wasn't given much of a choice then. I just thought…" She twiddled her fingers. "Maybe, for once, I could…enjoy it, ya know? Find out what it's like with…someone who loves me."

Someone who loves me.

Perhaps Alastor was foolish to be so nervous. Everybody had been telling him that he would think differently if it was with someone he loved. And not only did he love her, but she loved him.

"Is this really what you want, mon amour?" he asked.

She nodded. "But I won't do anything unless it's what you want too."

Alastor still wasn't sure if it was. What he did want was to satisfy his beloved. Give her all the love she deserved.

As he'd promised.

His reply was soft. "Alright."

Her head shot up. "Really?"

"Y-Yes. Though I…" He winced. "I'm uncertain of what…how I should…"

Tina smiled in understanding. "Fortunately for you, I have enough experience for the both of us."

Why did she have to go and say that? Now he was worried he wouldn't be good enough at it.

"Don't worry," she said as she pulled back the covers. "I'll take it slow."

Every function in his body seemed to stop working as Tina crawled on top of him and pressed her lips to his. She did start slow. Running her hands along the fabric of his pajamas, nibbling on his lower lip, straddling her legs on either side of his hips.

He inhaled sharply as she undid his top three buttons, reached inside, and stroked his chest.

Alastor tried to concentrate on the feelings he liked. The tenderness of her lips, the softness of her hands, the grinding of her pelvis against his.

No, he did not want to focus on that. But how could he? When her movements were getting faster, harder, more eager.

"That feel nice?" she said between pants.

"Y-Yes?" he squeaked.

It didn't feel nice at all.

He was getting hot. And sweaty. And very, very uncomfortable.

This was the last thing he wanted to be feeling with Tina.

Come on, Alastor, he told himself. Be a man and have sex with your wife.

Maybe it would get better once they actually got started.

Tina suddenly pulled away. "You sure you're ready for this?"

Alastor was too ashamed to meet her eyes. "O-Of course, I am."

"Really?" She pointed to his pelvis, which was as flat as a pancake. "Cuz ya don't look ready."

He winced. "A-Apologies, dear, I…I'm afraid I can't really…provoke it on command."

She tugged on his waistband. "Want me to help?"

He looked up in alarm. "Help?"

"Yeah. Like this."

He watched in horror as she dipped her hand into his sleep trousers.

Then came the touch.

The soft, brief, unpleasant touch.

It was too much.

"STOP!"

Acting on survival instinct, Alastor thrust his arms forward, pushing Tina off him. She landed at the far edge on her back, gripping the bedpost to keep herself from falling.

As if the last minute hadn't been torturous enough, the look of hurt in her eyes killed him.

"I-I'm sorry." She righted herself up, but kept her distance. "I didn't mean to… You said it was okay."

"I-I know." He didn't like how she was scooting her feet even further away from him. "I know what I said, but… I can't… I'm not… I don't…"

What could he say that wouldn't offend her? That wouldn't make him look like a complete fool?

He couldn't pretend either. Not with her.

Alastor scrambled off the bed. "I need a smoke."

And then he just left his wife there, in bed, barely dressed, untainted.

The Radio Demon went out on the first balcony he could find, waved his hand, and summoned a cigar. He snapped his fingers, igniting his thumb to serve as a lighter. He inhaled the smoke, calming his racing heart. Then he exhaled, releasing the tension in his muscles.

Chesterfield appeared before him, frowning and pointing to the house, as if to say, "What the fuck was that?"

"Well what was I supposed to do?" Alastor threw his arms in the air. "I thought I could do it. I almost did. But then… I don't know, I panicked!"

His elbows thumped onto the rail of the balcony. The cigar hung over the side as he ran a hand through his hair.

"I thought I was past this. After all those times we kissed and held each other at night. I thought if I loved her enough, I would be…fixed."

He took another puff as he looked out at the bayou. "But I couldn't do it. I finally found the right woman, and I still couldn't do it."

That everlasting smile vanished. "What's wrong with me, old friend? Why can't I just make love to my wife like any other man? Why can't I be…normal?"

The Radio Demon had never been normal. He was a killer, a cannibal, a madman. Not even his race, according to some, was normal. All that, he could deal with.

But why, of all the things that made up a human being, couldn't he have been normal about this?

Chesterfield, looking a little more sympathetic, opened his mouth and pointed to it. Then pointed back to the French doors leading inside.

"Yes, I suppose I should talk to her. But what can I say? 'Darling, I'm never going to make love to you, because the very thought of it repulses me?'" He sighed and burned up the cigar in his hand. "She'd never speak to me again. Or worse, she may leave."

Alastor didn't want to even consider that possibility.

The shadow then changed into Tina's silhouette, forming sad eyes.

"I did just leave her with no explanation, didn't I?" He took a deep breath and straightened up. "Not very gentlemanly of me, was it?"

When he returned to their room, he found Tina in bed, lying on her side, her back to him. He knew what that meant.

"Tina?" Alastor approached the bed. "Are you angry with me? Did I hurt you?"

There was no response.

"Look." He climbed in beside her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so harsh and abrupt. I know I said it was alright, but…"

Feeling like a helpless child again, he hugged his knees to his chest. "Remember when I proposed? I told you I didn't… That I wasn't… I'm not interested in…"

He dragged his hand down his face. "It's difficult to explain, because not even I know why I feel this way. Why I still feel this way. It has nothing to do with you, darling. I'm just not…ready."

He stopped himself from saying "normal."

"At least…not yet. A year ago, I asked you to be patient with me. Please, be patient a little longer."

Throughout Alastor's speech, Tina hadn't emitted so much as a snore.

"Hey." He laid a hand on her shoulder. "You know I love you, right?" Still nothing. "Tina? Precious, are you asleep?"

Met with more silence, Alastor sighed, bent down and kissed her cheek.

"Happy Anniversary," he whispered.

Then he switched off the lamp and settled on his side, away from her. There would be no cuddling tonight.

If he'd looked closer at Tina's face, he would've seen it streaming with tears.

Alastor struggled to maintain his smile as he recalled that night. "I wasn't ready then. Can you fault me for that?"

"No, but… Were ya ever gonna be ready?" Tina looked away from him. "Cuz if not, we're just wastin' our time here. I'm sorry, but it's not fair for either of us if—"

"I was ready."

She faced him again. "What?"

"On our tenth anniversary," Alastor explained. "I was waiting to surprise you."

Tina covered her mouth in horror.

"But you never came." There was a glint of anger in his gaze. "And where did I find you?"

She stood abruptly. "So that's what this dinner's about? One big guilt trip?"

He blinked. "No, Tina, I—"

"As if I didn't feel guilty enough," she said with a hand on her hip, "now you're tellin' me you were ready to take the next step with me while I was out—?"

Tina stopped, then grunted, and stomped around the table.

"I'm not trying to guilt trip you, Tina." Alastor chased after her. "I've long forgiven you for that."

"How?" She headed for the door. "How can ya possibly forgive something like that?"

"Because that's what spouses do." He grabbed her wrist before she could reach the knob. "They forgive each other, and then they move on."

She turned back to him and shouted, "Not when they cheat on you!"

They both froze. Tears formed in Tina's eyes.

"There," she muttered. "I said it. I was the one who messed things up, I admit it. You happy now?"

"I don't care, Tina." He cupped her face. "You can lay with all the demons in Hell, and I still wouldn't care. As long as I have your heart, that will be enough."

She stared up at him in disbelief. "Is it?"

He pressed his forehead to hers. "Always."

Tina shook her head and stepped out of his hold. "Let's face facts, Al. There's no repairin' what I did."

Alastor's smile shrank. "Aren't we sponsoring a hotel for redemption?"

"Quit pretendin' ya believe any of that crap." She wiped her tears. "We both know the real reason you're helpin' at all."

He shrugged. "Wanting to reconcile with my wife is still a form of redemption. I'm willing to give you a second chance, why can't you give me one?"

"Cuz I don't deserve a second chance, Al. Not for this. Especially now that I know you were…" She put her hands to her head. "I don't wanna talk about this right—"

CRASH!

Tina squeaked and jumped. A few second later, thunder rolled, causing her to shiver.

Alastor glanced out the window. "Seems another storm is brewing."

"I," she said, wrapping her arms around herself, "better get back to my room."

"Tina." He took her by the shoulder before she could take another step. "You don't have to face it alone."

"Don't…don't be silly." She shook her head. "I-I'm fine on my own. Been on my own for ten years."

She yelped as another bolt of lightning flashed.

"I don't doubt your independence." He squeezed her shoulder. "But no matter how tough you are, there are some things you cannot deal with by yourself. Or have you forgotten what happened last time?"

At the next roll of thunder, her eyes went black. "I…I can—"

"Stay." Alastor planted his hand on her other shoulder. "Please. I won't do anything. I just want to make sure you're safe."

Safe.

It had been so long since Tina had felt safe. Not since… Well, the last time Alastor had held her.

Was it wrong for her to feel that way again? At least for a little while?

No, she didn't deserve that feeling. Not after how she'd wronged him.

But he was there, his arms open, welcoming her back.

Like they always were.

CRASH!

Against her better judgement, Tina threw her arms around her husband.

Sheesh, this was distressing for me to write, as I had to recall those old insecurities from before I knew asexuality was a thing.

Originally, I wasn't going to reveal what Tina did for a few more chapters, but then realized Tina and Alastor could only neglect to mention it for so long. Plus you all seemed to be under the impression that it was just the baby thing that was the problem (mainly because I made you think that) and were getting annoyed with it. This is why I can't keep secrets in my writing.