"Ok, ok. Just gotta play it cool. Be cool. Smile, be genuine. And pray they don't have hounds to release on me." A blonde haired woman said to herself as she approached the gates of a stately manor.

She walked up and pressed the call button on the intercom.

"Hello, may I help you?" Came a proper sounding British voice.

"Um, yeah. I'm here to see Mr. Wayne."

" I'm sorry but Master Bruce is not accepting visitors at the moment. "

"Please, Jeeves. It's urgent. Real urgent! I really, REALLY need his help."

There was a notable silence on the com.

"Oh, I can't believe I'm saying this but, tell'em Harley Quinn is here to see him. Please, jeeves."

" ...Are you armed, Ms. Quinzel? "

"With other than my good looks and winning personality? No. Well, I do have pepper spray, but I think it's empty."

Harley fished the bottle from her purse, which was hanging from her shoulder. She pressed the sprayer repeatedly but got nothing.

"Yeah, it's empty. Musta used the last shot on that handsy drunk outside the batburger last night. So, yeah, I got nothing out here, Jeeves."

"It's Alfred. And give me a moment."

The intercom went silent and Harley waited, silently praying she'd get an audience with the billionaire. Her prayers were answered when Bruce Wayne did appear. With Dick Grayson and Damien Wayne by his side. Harley audibly gulped at how hard all three were staring daggers at her. Then Bruce put on an affable, but obviously fake, smile.

"Well, hello, Ms. Quinzel. What can we do for you?" Bruce asked .

"You can drop the act, first off. I know you haven't forgotten our past run ins."

" I'm trying to give you a chance, Ms. Quinzel. I haven't forgotten about what you have done in the past, that's true. But that also includes all the good I've heard you've done since breaking away from the Joker. So, to honor your turn around, I'm giving you a chance."

"Well, it's probably more than I deserve, so I appreciate it. And I hope you're still feeling generous when you hear what I have to say."

"Well, let's hear it already. " Dick piped up.

"Right. Well, the thing is, I need your help."

"With what, exactly?" Damien needled.

" Well, you see, I...I need a place to stay. I'm sorta homeless at the moment. "

"So you want a hand out?" Dick asked, taking a defensive pose.

"More like a hand in?"

" What? " Damien asked.

"I was...hopin' you'd let me...stay here?" Harley asked with puppy dog eyes.

"Are you completely off your...oh wait, yeah you are." Dick said , folding his arms.

"I don't blame ya for being suspicious but I really need your need help."

" Then go to a shelter. Come on, father. We've wasted enough time for now. " Damien said.

" 'Sigh' I was hopin' I wouldn't have to do this but here it goes. I know who you are. Who you all are. "

Harley was glad Wayne Manor was a ways away from the city so nobody could hear what she was about to say.

"Nightwing." She said pointing at Dick.

"Robin. " She said next, moving her arm to point at Damien.

"And the big man himself, Batman." Harley said,somewhat flourishing her hand as it moved to Bruce.

"Oh, sure. And next you'll say Alfred is Batwing." Dick said with a scoff.

"Don't play dumb with me. I may seem like just a bubble headed blonde bimbo, but I was a trained and well studied psychiatrist. Psychoanalysis is part of my thing. And I lined up all the dominos years ago. All signs point to Batman and Bruce Wayne being the same person. After that, the robins, one batgirl and all their eventual rebrands just sorta click."

Dick was now reaching an ecrisma stick hidden in his waist band, while Damien was pulling a knife. Bruce saw this in his peripheral vision and called them both down with a wave of his hand. He then went and opened the gate.

"We'll talk more inside." Bruce said sternly .

"Right."

The four walked in and Bruce led them to the den.

"Alfred, bring Ms. Quinzel some tea and snacks." Bruce called.

"Right away, Master Bruce. Does Ms. Quinzel have any preferences? "

"Um, chamomile and biscuits." Harley said.

"Coming up, Ms. Quinzel."

Harley noticed the three pronged stare down she was getting from the bats.

"What? I enjoy a nice tea time as much as anybody."

"You know what we're waiting to hear, Quinn." Dick said.

" How long have you known? " Damien asked.

"Like I said, years. Joker once asked me to put my psychiatric days to use and see if I could figure this out. And obviously, I did. But, back then, I was afraid Joker would get rid of me if I told him what i'd deduced. Figured I wouldn't be useful anymore. Joker had a tendency to throw away things and people who had been useful in one major way. Like, I guess you could say there was a usefulness gauge for him. You could slowly empty the gauge for him over time or all at once. I opted for over time. So, I lied and said I couldn't figure it out. Looking back, I'm glad I did. Even with as many run ins as we've had, I'd still hate to see what Gotham would be without you guys. Having seen the city's underbelly first-hand, I know it's better to have you around. "

"So, you haven't told another soul?" Bruce asked, his voice definitely taking on its signature tone as Batman.

"B-man, think about it. If I had, wouldn't every lowlife in Gotham be beating down the doors to this place by now?"

"She has a point." Dick said.

"I still dont trust her." Damien said.

"And I ain't mad at ya for it, bird boy. I don't blame you. But I'll do whatever I need to to get you to believe me. Cause I really need help right now and you guys are the best ones I knew to turn to."

"Then lets get down to it. Why do you need our help?" Bruce asked.

"Well, ya see, its complicated. So, as I know you know, I was running an apartment building on Coney Island. I was also starting a little something with a guy named Michael. You might know him better as Booster Gold."

"Pardon the intrusion, but I thought you were with Ms. Isley." Alfred said as he brought a tray and set it on the coffee table in front of Harley.

"Thanks, Jeeves." Harley said, taking the cup of tea.

"Alfred." The butler corrected.

"Sorry, I'll try to remember that. As for Red, we had a falling out. I wanted to go straight, maybe even become a hero. But Ivy didn't want that. We got into a spat and she just flat out told me that I should 'stop trying to save her.' Some hero, huh? Can't even save some one I loved."

Damien and Dick noticed a twitch in the bat's eyes.

"Struck a chord with that one." They both thought.

"Anyway, things happened and I ended up crashing with Booster. And after I nearly died stopping Granny Goodness from making L.A. a billion times worse, me and him were celebrating my big win...and me not dying. At that moment, I said screw it and planted one on him. We started being sorta official then."

"I had heard about the incident in Los Angeles. That was impressive work, Harley." Bruce said.

"It's weird but really nice to hear praise from you, B-man. Wish Mike was here to hear it too."

"What happened to Booster Gold?" Damien asked.

"Well, kiddo, Booster was a time traveller. So, every now and then, he gets pulled into some sorta quantum leap shenanigans. And that's what happened here. Guy named Rip Hunter showed up, said he really needed Booster's help. I wanted to come too but Mike wouldn't let me. He said i'd risked my life enough for a long while with Granny. He promised he'd be back in no time. Days went by and, nothing. A full week later, Rip showed back up, looking like hell. I patched him up best I could and he told me they had been attacked in the time stream by a villain he had never seen before. Booster and him got separated and he had yet to find him. He had just had a run in with some of this guy's cronies when he came to me. He promised me he'd keep looking but he made me promise to go somewhere I would be safe. The last place someone would expect to find me. I thought of you, Bats. Nobody would expect Harley Quinn to be rooming with Batman, right? So, now you see why I need your help. Rip made it sound like those goons could come after me and he said that none of my usual spots would do. I had to think outside the box here. So, can I please stay here?"

"Hmmm."

" I'll be good. I'll help around the mansion. I'll help Alfred cook and clean and do laundry. I'll even clean the batcave. That giant penny has got to be a mutha to clean. "

"She's not wrong." Alfred said under his breath.

"How many times has she been in the cave?" Dick asked.

"Quite a few. Either for her own safety or because she had info about Joker's plans." Bruce said.

"I see."

"Well, B-man? Can I? Please? I won't go anywhere you don't want me to. I can't stay locked up in my room all the time though. I get cabin fever really easily. But I promise to stay outta anywhere you say is off limits. "

"Damien."

" Yes, father? "

"Remember that tracker we've been working on?"

" Yes. "

"Go get it from the cave."

" Yes sir. "

Damien left swiftly and returned a few minutes later with the device resting in his palm.

"Whoa, that thing just looks like a mole." Harley said.

"That was the idea, Harley. Now, I'm going to give you a chance and let you stay here. I will have Orphen and Wonder woman both meet us here tomorrow morning. They have skills or equipment that is better than any mechanical lie detector. You must pass their tests to continue staying here. Also, you must wear this tracker the entire time you stay here. It's range covers the entire city of Gotham. "

"So, I could go get a milkshake if Alfie ain't available, but you'll know where I am all the time. And, not that I would but, I'm not allowed to leave the city."

"That's correct. So, do we have a deal?"

"Absolutely. I expected a cage in the cave. This is loads better."

"Very well then."

Bruce took the tracker from Damien. He placed it on the back of Harley's neck, just below her hairline.

"Attach." Bruce said .

Harley felt a cold spot on her neck for a moment, like a drop of water have just hit her.

"Whew, cold. What was that?"

"A localized anesthetic. It feels cold to the touch, but it works fast. It number the area long enough to allow the tracker to drive its anchors into your skin."

"So, that's how it stays on. And I can't take it off without tearing it out. "

"And doing a fair bit of damage to a sensitive area."

" Yeah, think I'll just leave it alone. "

"It will only come off with voice authorization. Not just from me but the entire 'bat family ' as I've heard us called."

" So, everyone has to tell this thing to kick rocks. "

"Which means you will have to earn everybody's trust."

"Good luck." Damien said.

" Best be a good girl, Harley. " Dick said.

"I will! And mark my words, you're gonna love having me around. You'll be calling me aunt Harley before this is over."