Falling For A Ghost

by pchop

Athrun blames himself for what had happened to her, and maybe that's why she constantly visited him and only him. Maybe it was retribution, because her visits were a constant, painful reminder of what happened and what isn't. But, maybe, her visits were to ease the pain, because they also brought him solace. Post Seed. Not an AU, but most likely contain AU elements. AsuCaga. R&R.

5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Athrun was seated on his bed. His arms wrapped around his knees, his head buried in them. He spent the entire week that way, only to move for a meal—or two-or to use the bathroom. The knocks on his door were greeted by mostly one word answers; he never let anyone in. At times, Lacus would come in with a tray of food, and would sit there until he ate it…that was until he started locking his door. He would not be bothered, not unless it was her.

Cagalli did not visit him for days.

She'll be back, right? He thought. She's been visiting nearly everyday for months…she wouldn't stop, right?

He remembered how she looked right before she vanished. Her expression was that of someone who had just lost everything—totally defeated. And in a way, she was. Her only family was Kira, but they were worlds apart. Athrun could say that she had him—that he was there for her- but he wasn't sure she felt as though he was.

I pushed her away. What if she never comes back? It's like her dying all over again, but worst, because I could have fixed it. I could have been there for her and helped her get back to us…but I was a fool.

"Cagalli, I miss you."

Suddenly, there was a knock on his door. Athrun's head popped up in complete astonishment.

"Athrun?"

It was Kira. The situation must have seemed terrible if Kira was knocking on his door. For months Kira spent most of his day brooding over the events of the war—from his losses. He interacted with Lacus, the children and everyone else, but he wasn't the same. A light in him blew out.

"Can I come in?" he said from the other side of the door.

Athrun wanted to say yes. Athrun wanted to pour out the dark emotions he was feeling to his best friend, but he knew he would seem insane. How could he tell Kira about Cagalli and not sound like he was losing his mind? If he was to tell anyone, it would be Kira; Lacus would be second, maybe. Athrun knew in his heart that he wasn't crazy or imagining things, yet he didn't have the energy to try and convince others of that. Not now.

What good would it do anyway?

With a sigh, he buried his head, not saying a word.

R&R