Chapter 129-
"So who's Dean?" Steve said as we walked up the stairs to Sam's place.
"Uh… he's an old friend of ours." I said. "We're just going to go in there. Act like a couple. You know side hugs, hand holding, and we hang out. That's all."
"Nora I know how to be a couple. We are… were one." Steve said rubbing the back of his neck.
"Right, let's do this." I said opening the door and walking in. "I'm back."
"Hey how's… Steve!" Sam said giving me a look.
"Hey Sam." Steve greeted.
"Steve meet Dean, he's an old friend." I said.
"Yeah just a friend." Dean said awkwardly before shaking Steve's hand. Oh this was a horrible idea. "Nice to meet you."
"Pleasure's all mine." Steve said politely.
"Table's set" Sam said.
"Take out smells great." I said. "Need a hand with anything?"
"No it's my turn to play host, you guys sit down." Sam said.
We walked to the dining room and Steve pulled out my chair for me.
"Thanks." I whispered before scooting in.
"So Dean how do you know Nora and Sam?" Steve asked.
"We go back a ways since freshman year of college." Dean said. "Sam was my roommate and Nora was a TA/ research assistant for Doctor Erik Selvig and I was his assistant."
"I know Doctor Selvig, he works with the team in the research department." Steve said. "Didn't know you worked with him."
"It was years back." I said.
"Are you also a scientist?"" Dean asked.
"Uh no…I'm Steve Rogers." Steve said and Dean's eyes widened in realization.
"Y-You're Captain America?!" Dean practically shouted.
"Only when I'm wearing the suit." Steve said trying to lighten the mood. I love the fact that he never let the fame go to his head.
"Lasagna freshly reheated from the oven." Sam said putting the casserole down.
"Just like old times. Except Jess didn't burn anything." Dean said and Sam and I smiled sadly.
"Yeah, she got better at cooking over the years." I said trying to lighten the mood.
"Do you live here in New York Dean?" Steve asked.
"Just moved actually. Got a job at Rand Industries." Dean said proudly.
"Congrats." I said.
"Thanks for not kicking me out when you found out I work for the competition." Dean said.
"Not really a competitor." I said.
"Didn't your stock drop like three points in the past week?" Sam retorted.
"At least we don't blow up our conventions." Dean retorted.
"That was like eight years ago, keep up with the times." I said.
"Enough about work, how's life outside of work?" Sam said.
"Uh… I don't really have much going on. After Lisa I just decided to focus on work and it's obviously paid off." Dean said.
"Is Lisa your wife?" Steve asked and I kicked his foot under the table. We were venturing into dangerous territory.
"No she's uh, my soulmate. Things didn't work out between us. She's married now to an accountant and lives in London. Just because you have someone's name written on you doesn't always mean it's meant to be. I'll always care about her but she isn't the one that got away." He said looking at me making Sam and I almost choke on our food.
"You alright?" Steve said rubbing circles on my back.
"Yeah..." I coughed. "Just went down the wrong pipe." I said as the baby monitor sounded with the very familiar cries of my son. "That's mine. Excuse me."
I got up and went to go check on Wren. Wren was crying in the portable crib Sam kept around. "It's okay Buddy." I rocked him. I quickly changed his diaper before putting him down again. He quickly dozed off.
Meanwhile-
"You're a lucky man." Dean said. "Nora's amazing."
"Yeah she's my world." Steve said.
"How long have you too been seeing each other?" Dean asked.
"Uh…" Steve started panicking
"Few months now." Sam filled in.
"Well she's a keeper, don't let her slip away or you'll regret it for the rest of your life." Dean said.
"I know." Steve said.
"Where are you staying at?" Sam asked Dean.
"Oh uh I'm looking for a place but I have my sights set on an apartment in the upper west side." Dean answered.
"Good area." Steve said.
"Must be to get Nora to move here. She always said she'd never leave Dallas." Dean said.
"Well people change." Sam said trying to ease some of the growing tension in the room as well as having a double meaning.
"They do. When was the last time you were all together?" Steve asked.
"Uh… Connor's Christening." Dean asked. "I'm his godfather."
"I thought Wren was…" Steve started.
"No, we moved a few months after and Wren was always there for all of us." Sam said.
"Well I'm sure you visited as much as you could." Steve said still not knowing what was going on.
"I got him back down. I think he's starting to teeth." I said sitting back down.
"He looks just like you." Dean said.
"Really? I think he looks just like his dad. Practically his clone." I said.
"Yeah when he wrinkles nose." Sam said.
"That's computer screen saver." I said laughing.
"But he has your smile." Dean said with a smile.
"He had to have something." I said with a chuckle. Steve put his arm around my shoulder in a side hug and I put a hand on his knee.
"He's a great kid. They all are." Steve said.
"Makes me want to have one of your own right Steve?" Dean said and we all tensed at that comment. I rubbed circles on Steve's knee with my thumb trying to comfort him.
"Yeah maybe one day." Steve said.
"Nora we should catch lunch one of these days, we both work in Midtown." Dean said.
"Maybe." I said obviously knowing that was never going to happen. "It's going to be hard to plan though. The ER is full all the time. You have no idea the amount of times I've had to cancel on Steve and Sam."
"I've missed you." He said before quickly corrected. "Both of you." He said looking at Sam.
"Life happens." Sam said.
"It brought us back for a reason." Dean said looking at me.
"Also took us to different places for a reason and I love how that's worked out. Don't you Sam?" I asked.
"Yeah, Good and Bad it's worked out the way it's supposed to." Sam said giving Dean a glare.
"Doesn't mean we don't all have regrets." Dean said.
"That we do. Things we would take back and change if we had the chance," I said.
"I wouldn't take it back but I would change one thing." Dean said giving me a doe eyed look before the monitor rang again.
"That's mine." Sam said getting up.
'No Sammy don't leave me' I thought.
The silence around the table was deafening.
"I'm going to get us refills." I said getting up to get the wine bottle. I walked into the kitchen and spotted it right away but slow half steps toward it.
'Don't you think leaving those two alone is a bad idea? Dean's one step away from shouting I slept with her twice and I want her back.' Aya said.
'It's been years, I thought he was over it already. I sure as hell am.' I said.
'You leave an impression Nora.' Aya said.
"Hey." Dean said walking in.
"Hey." I said.
"Just wanted to get a glass of water." Dean said.
"There's a pitcher in the fridge." I said.
"Okay." He said. "You look amazing Nora."
"Uh thanks." I said. "You look good."
"Steve's a great guy." Dean said.
"He is." I said. 'When he's not being a dumbass.' I added silently.
"He's a lucky guy. He really loves you." Dean said.
"Yeah I love him too." I said not lying about that. I was pissed but I never stopped loving him.
"I'd do anything to have that with you again." Dean said.
"We never had that. We were both going through a rough patch and we made a mistake." I said.
"We never gave us a chance." Dean said.
"There was never an us to begin with. You had Lisa." I said.
"Soulmarks mean nothing. I was an idiot to let you go. You didn't need soulmarks to fall in love with your husband or Steve…" Dean said.
'Nora, rip the freaking Band-Aid off already.' Aya said.
"Stop. Dean we were really good friends and maybe in a parallel universe where things were different maybe we could have had a shot…" I started knowing that even then it was never going to happen. "But they're not. I found the epic love of my life and it hasn't always been easy. I've lost a lot. I've cried and I've been mad but at the end of the day I wouldn't change a single things because I still love him and I honestly wish you could have the same but it's not me and you have to move past this."
Oh fuck I still love Steve and it took running into one of the biggest mistakes from my past to fucking realize I'm not even mad at him I'm just scared he'll leave me again.
Damn it I hate being wrong.
"You're not an easy person to get over Nora Stark." Dean said.
"I've been told but it is possible." I said before going back to the dining room and refilling all our glasses.
"Look who I found planning a coupe." Sam said coming in with Ellie and Wren in his arms.
"There's my little rebel." I said grabbing Wren. "Or are they the new Bonnie and Clyde" I said blowing a raspberry on Ellie's cheek making her laugh.
"Considering how that ends I hope not." Sam said laughing.
"Daddy can I have some cake?" Connor said walking in.
"Small slice okay?" Sam said.
"Okay." Connor cheered. I went to sit down with Wren sitting up against me.
Steve just stared at Wren in wonder. I forgot this is by far the closest he had ever gotten to my son.
"Oh" Wren cried out before blowing raspberries.
"Someone's happy to be out of jail." I said.
"He does have your smile." Steve said fondly. Wren pushed himself forward and held his hands out for him. "Hey little guy."
"AH!" He said before trying to bite Steve's finger.
"Oh!" Steve said not expecting that.
"Yeah, he definitely teething." I said grabbing a napkin and wiping some drool off of Steve's finger before using Wren's bib to dry him off a bit.
"Dean had to go." Sam said.
"Oh, is he okay to drive?" I asked.
"We once saw him take a thirty second kegstand and finish half a bottle of whiskey and he was still sober enough to get everyone home. He'll be fine. Also he took a cab." Sam said.
"I should probably go too." Steve said.
"No, stay for dessert. I'll drop you off after." I said.
"If it's no trouble." Steve said.
"You kidding I owe you after all that." I said.
"Okay." Steve said.
We had a pretty enjoyable time laughing at the kids antics and watching Connor lawyer Sam into letting him stay up later. We called it a night so we could get Wren and Ellie into their beds or else we'd pay for it later.
I teleported the three of us to my house considering I probably owed Steve and explanation considering everything he had probably heard.
"Hey I'll just be a minute." I said pointing to the sleeping baby in my arms.
"Oh it's fine." Steve said. "I can go."
"No we should talk. I owe you that much." I said.
"I'll just be here then." Steve said.
I teleported up to the nursery and got Wren settled. I set up the baby monitor and told Friday to alert me if Wren needed me before going down stairs.
"He should be out for the night." I said sitting down.
"He's adorable." Steve said.
"Yeah, he can be a little demon when he doesn't get his bottle on time or his nap." I said. "I am so sorry you had to sit through what was probably the most awkward and uncomfortable dinner in history."
"It wasn't that bad. Remember that one time Howard dragged us out so we could help him break up with that girl what was her name?" Steve asked.
"Sally Mae." I said. "I guess the apple does not fall far from the tree."
"You were honest with Dean maybe not entirely but you didn't lead him on." Steve said.
"I should probably explain that." I said.
"You don't have to… I kinda heard you guys in the kitchen." Steve said.
"You didn't get everything." I said. "You remember how I told you and Bucky that before you guys there was only one other guy? Dean was that guy."
"He was your…" Steve said not wanting to finish that sentence.
"Yeah. He ended things when he met his soulmate Lisa. Things didn't work out between them and that was my fault." I said.
"What do you mean?" Steve asked.
"After you and Buck 'died' well I thought you were dead, I got really low, like rock bottom low and the night of Connor's christening I slept with Dean. He and Lisa were having problems and that was the final nail in the coffin for their relationship." I said.
"Oh… uh." Steve said not knowing what to say.
"That's one of the biggest mistakes of my life that to this day I still regret. Sam and Jess knew I wasn't okay and had told Dean before that so when they found out they took sides and slowly cut him off. Today was the first time Sam and I had seen Dean in almost five years and as you can tell he had hopes we could give each other a chance." I said.
"Wow, I am… wow." Steve said.
"I didn't want to drag you into this for obvious reasons." I said.
"No it's fine. I'll always be there when you need me Nora no matter how strange the situation is." Steve said.
"But still I'm really sorry." I apologized. "I owe you big time."
"You don't owe me anything." Steve said. "I heard what you said in the kitchen, was that true?"
"Steve I… I never said I didn't love you. I was mad… still am maybe not as much as before but you did some damage and that's not easy to get over." I said.
"Nora I am so so…" he started
"Stop. We have both apologized enough for almost a century." I said doing the math in my head.
"I'm not giving up on you Nora. We can move past this." Steve said.
"It's not about you anymore. Facing one of the biggest mistakes of my past made me realize that it's not entirely about me being angry at you it's about me being scared to ever trust you again." I said.
"What does that mean for us?" Steve asked.
"I don't know." I said.
"I'm not going to stop fighting for you. Nora, you and Buck you're my damn world." Steve said.
"But you're not mine. Wren is. When I found Bucky again I told him that Wren comes before everything including us and that if he wanted to be with me it had to be the same for him or else there was no way this work, can you tell me it'd be the same for you?" I said and Steve stayed quiet. "I want you to seriously think about that before you say anything else." I said putting a hand on his shoulder and sending him home.