The life of PokeSexuals

Sand Arrow (Gabite) and Tiko (Male)

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It was late at night as a person was sitting at his desk, looking at his finished script.

"..."

"..." The script said back if it was alive.

"I don't need this." Then he threw the script that would've won 100's of emmys into the incinerator. "Phew, now that that is outta my life, time for me to tell my director what I want for my next movie!"

Tomorrow morning, a man awoke to the sound of his kids fighting. He walked into the living room to his nagging mother in law, he ignored it as his mediocre wife gave him burnt pancakes. That's when his phone rang. He checked the caller ID.

'What does this idiot want?' he thought before answering. "Yeah, what is it?"

"Hello Ferdinand the stupid smelly Mankey, I got a movie for you." Said a man in a black T shirt that had a rainbow on it, white pants, and blue shades.

"If this bombs, I can kill myself right?"

"Don't worry, this movie will kill so many brain cells, your mother in law will finally shut up."

He pinched the space between his eyebrows and sighed. "That's the closest thing to good news ever in my life."

"Great, see yah at lunch, but when I say lunch, I mean my lunch not yours because the only thing that matters to me is what I do."

Later at the studios...everyone really didn't feel like being here but it's their job and unfortunately they have to do their job for the worst movie script writer ever. So a lot of groaning could be heard because working for him killed what made them happy.

"We didn't sign up for this." Said the actor playing the main character.

"Well you did in my head and that's all that'll ever matter to me, Yuri Describe, the writer of such cinematic bombs as "Houndour Hotdogs", "My Ex-Wife Kissed my Step-son", and the number absolute worst of them all "Gamba Hurtsna the Whimsicott Who Killed Travis' Mom 1-20.""

'The fact it got 19 sequels is amazing.' Thought Ferdinand, who wore a red vest, black pants and a red cap that said 'I hate my boss'. "Okay, Singing Songs of Shark Love Scene 1 Take 1, Action!"

The 1st scene was a city at night, a couple was just taking a shortcut back to the girlfriend's house until they heard a rustling in the bushes.

"Dave, did you hear that?"

"I think it was just a Rattata, don't worry Lina."

That's when they heard a louder rustling, followed by a crunching!

"Okay, that can't be a Rattata."

"Then a Braviary obviously ate the Rattata."

That's when said Rattata was thrown down to their feet, dead with a huge bite taken out of it.

"Okay fine, we can run now!"

They screamed while flailing their arms around. The thing chased them around the park, gliding gracefully until...

"Dave!" Shouted the girl before getting eaten!

"Aw-man, not only did the monster eat my date, it also ate my babysitter from when I was a kid. We were gonna have such kinky sex after this." That's when he found himself at a sandy area of the park. "I gotta get the cops!"

Too late as a pair of claws pulled him under the sand, never to be seen again. That's when a shiny Gabite emerged from the sand and ran out of the park, looking for it's next target!

The next morning...we see a man pick up the newspaper and que the 1st song!

"Oh my dear, come over here!

The news gave us something to fear!"

"What is it honey?

The stock taking our money?"

"A dangerous Gabite is here!

If we don't leave it's gonna eat our rears!"

Then we see them start packing as we pan to some hobos!

"It's a new monster every day

Now this city is gonna pay!"

"The end is near, flee from here!

I'm gonna run away on my steer!" Then a hobo jumped onto a Tauros. "Yah!"

That's when we pan to the police station.

"Apparently this monster has been eating everyone in sight!

How are we gonna stop something with much might!" Said the chief as he looked through his list of cops. "Time for the weirdo to save us all! He can save this before it takes the fall! To this Gabite! TIKOOOOO GREEEEEEEEY!"

Meanwhile in Tiko Grey's office...

"I am officer Tiko Grey, I'm a very odd cop but the boss says I'm okay.

But really I think he just sees me as useful in weird waaaaaaaaaaaays." This black eyed man wore a blue button shirt, a black and white striped tie, green shorts, he had black hair with a green stripe and he had sandals on.

"Uh...Officer Grey?"

"Yes?"

"The Chief wants to see you."

"Time again for the police's oddball ace,

Can he win this next case? WHATEVER IT MAY BEEEEEEEEE..."

That's when we pan to a flash mob outside of town hall.

"Please oh please oh great Arceus, we're begging you please...

Hear the words of these...

Don't let us die!"

And that's the end of the 1st song as we go back to the police station and see our main character.

"You wanted to talk to me chief?"

"Sit down Grey."

He sat down on the floor instead of a chair.

"I'm sure that you're aware that a wild Gabite is going around eating the citizens."

"What?"

"Huh? How could you not know? It's all on the news paper and the news channels."

"Silly Chief, I don't spend my mornings with the news."

"Then what do you spend your mornings on?"

"Gardening." Then we cutaway to Tiko and his 'Gardening'.

"Ow! Ow! Ow! Stop hitting me with that shovel!"

"Then memorize the Tiko Grey anthem!"

Now we cut back to Tiko and the chief.

"Anyways Tiko, it seems that this Gabite has been responsible for the string of missing couples cases."

"And you want me to try and hunt it down, right?"

"No I want you to dress it up and teach it the salsa, of course I want you to hunt it down!"

"Okay."

"And in case you'd like to train this powerful Pokemon to being a powerful partner..." He then handed Tiko some balls and a card. "I'm issuing you these balls and a trainer license."

"Whoa...wait, why does this license say Toki?"

"What?" The chief took the card and it said Tiko. "Huh?"

"Gotcha!"

"Grey!"

Tiko rushed out of the police station as the chief started throwing his collection of coffee mugs! "Okay Tiko, you're officially a trainer...with no Pokemon...I better try catching something if I wanna take on that Gabite."

"Hey mister, why are you talking to yourself?" Asked a 10 year old boy.

"Because you touch yourself. Leave me alone!"

Tiko made it to a park where he started throwing Pokeballs.

And que the 2nd song!

"I hit, they escape!

I bait, they still escape!

They attack, I run!

It's all the fun, of being a Pokemon Trainer!"

I hold them down,

they take me down!" Then he gets hit by Hoothoot using Take Down.

"I laugh, I cry!

I beg, I try!

1...2...3...dang!

1...2...3...mang!

1...2...3...Aang!

1...2...3...fou-" Then the ball explodes and the Pokemon runs away!

"Nothing's been this hard and it's not gonna go my way.

I haven't failed this hard eversince the arrest on broadway, HEY!"

Then he throws the ball at something as the 2nd song ends!

"Okay last chance, not sure what I caught because I went into a blind fury for a sec..."

1...2...3...and the Pokemon escapes!

"Aw-man!"

"Nice try you fool!"

"Ah! It's the shiny Gabite!"

"Name's Sand Arrow! And you're toast!"

"Can I be Kalos toa-eek!" Then Tiko dodged it's Dragon Claw! 'Okay, looking at the back fin, it's a female, and I know just how to charm the females...'

Then we cutaway to Tiko "charming" ladies.

"Come get charms, charm bracelets, charm necklaces, charm dick rings! All the money I make will then be donated to trainer school!"

Back to Tiko running for his life! "Help, it knows Stone Edge!" He shouted as rocks speared or flipped cars over! He was about to run down some stairs until Sand Arrow tackled him! They tumbled down the steps until he landed on top of her and not just on top of her...

'Is...is th-this human...'

'Am...am-I...'

'KISSING ME/HER?!'

She threw him off and was about to dig an escape tunnel!

"She's getting away!" That's when Tiko grabbed her by the tail as she started tunneling through the city! "Whoa! Where are we going?!"

"What are you doing?!"

"Trying to apprehend you! So either turn yourself in or become my partner!" he threatened before they went downward and he nearly lost his grip. "Woah!"

"Hah! If you really wanna stop me, then why not sing to me why you love me and mean it? Only then will I surrender." That's when they made it to the beach and she whipped her tail so hard he let go and fell face 1st into a fat sweaty sunbather.

"Oh this is gonna be gross!"

*splat!*

"You have 3 days, fail to serenade me and I'll have my entire family Draco Meteor this city into oblivion!" She then picked him up.

"Wait but...we just met! How am I gonna make a song about what I love about you if this is the 1st time we met?"

"I dunno, but I just met you and looking at you now...you're kinda cute."

Then we enter Sand Arrow's imagination as we enter the 3rd song!

We see Tiko Grey in pop boy band clothing!

"I may be dressed gay

But I gotta say.

That you are so fine,

and I wanna make u mine!" When then see his face close to hers before he pulled away.

"You're my cupid's arrow,

People say our chances are narrow.

I wanna say fuck you world,

because she's my girl!" Then he started thrusting.

That's when on the right, a Lucario, Blaziken and Gallade and on the right, a Sawk, Scizor and Hawlucha all showed up in the same get up and started singing back up!

"And as we grow old

The story that will be told.

We about the way you and I,

All you and I.

I don't care if I just rhymed the same thing.

Just as long as I can sing.

All about my sweet honey.

And then something about money.

Girl I think you're fine!

And I wanna make you miiiiine, oh yeah!

You're so so fine,

And I wanna make you mine!"

Then the song ends there and we go back to reality. Sand Arrow sighed as she dropped Tiko.

"If you wanna know about me, guess we can go out on a date, but after the date, I expect you to write a city saving song."

"Okay...one date then I'll write you something so beautiful you'll want triplets!"

'Like that'll happen.'

Later that night.

"Okay, what irony that out 1st date would be here, the very park where your killing spree began." he remarked looking around the place. 'Hopefully I don't wind up in the dirt here.'

"I've made a mental not to kill you."

"And don't eat any of the couples going on dates here please."

"No promises."

'This is gonna be a fun night.' he thought before quickly pulling a guitar out of who knows where. And so he began writing, practicing, ignoring the Wailord sized Pikachu rampaging through the city, and then soon finally getting the song ready. "Let's do this Tiko Grey, time to lose your virginity through beastiality!" He commandeered a car and made it to the outskirts of the city as Sand Arrow and her family were marching.

"I'm gonna raise this place to the ground." growled Sand Arrow's dad.

"Stooooooooop!" Shouted Tiko Grey.

"Well, well, well, it isn't-" Sand Arrow's brother was swiftly shut up as Tiko beat him with a stop sign!

"Stop, stop, stoppity! Stap, step, steip, stop, stup, styp."

Then we see Tiko jumping around and blowing whistles and still shouting stop, then curled up like a baby while shouting stop some more before finally calming down.

"Stop...stop...*gasp*...stop..."

"You feel better now?" Asked Sand Arrow's mom before handing him a Sitrus Berry.

"Yes, thanks." Tiko ate the Sitrus Berry and then stepped up to Sand Arrow. "Are you ready? Are you ready to feel love in your heart again?"

"Yes, do you have the song to do it?"

"Yep babe, I hope one of your family members are a priest, because you're gonna want the wedding immediately after this."

"I'm one." called out a random cousin.

Then the 2nd to last song started.

"2nd to last song?" Asked Sand Arrow's grandparents. "You mean this movie's level of stupid is gonna worsen even more?!"

"It seems you've been killing couples, because you wanna feel again.

I'll stop you from eating peoples, and I got the cure for that end!

Please be mine you beautiful shark.

We'll have enough kids to fill Noah's arc.

I love the power your Dragon Pulse

It just makes my heart convulse!" That's when 2 more cops appeared and began playing drums and electric guitar!

"Sand Arrow, your trainer must be cupid!

My love for you has made me so stupid!

You're the only Dragon type for me!

If we were together I'd be filled with glee!

I love you never judged me on our 1st date,

Even when I got my tux at a cheap rate!" Then the 2 cops said cheap rate.

"This song really sucks." Said Sand Arrow's Uncle.

"Yeah but look, it's working." Said Sand Arrow's 3rd cousin twice removed on her mom's side.

Sand Arrow could feel the love he had for her.

"Please don't destroy my hometown.

I was so close to getting its name down.

Besides, look at the opportunity,

It's easy to raise a family in this city!

I love your digging power

If I had that I could get anywhere in less than an hour!" That's when laser lights, smoke machines and fireworks started shooting all over!

"He's using this song to pre-emptive strike us! Come-on family let's..."

"No! Let him finish!" Said Sand Arrow.

"I love that I met you,

A shiny Pokemon woohoo!

Sand Arrow, oh Sand Arrow.

Our love was foretold in the tarot.

If I failed, then it's okay,

At least a beautiful girl ended my last day."

And that was the end of the 2nd to last song.

Sand Arrow's family was silent and all turned to said girl.

"So how was that?" Asked Tiko.

"Can we consummate while having the wedding at the same time?"

"There's a first for everything babe." And that's when Tiko was tackled to the ground by Sand Arrow who forced her tongue into his mouth.

"Well, guess we better get this wedding started. Dearly beloved..." started Sand Arrow's cousin as she unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock.

She used a claw to lightly stroke it while he held her head and started wrestling his tongue against hers.

'Keep it up Sand Arrow, holy shit.' He thought as they moved their tongues deeper down each other's mouths. He felt his dick slowly getting hard making him reach down to rub her rear. 'Her skin feels kinda rough, but we'll work it out.' Thought Tiko as the priest continued.

"We are gathered here today, not to destroy the city with a flurry of Draco Meteors, but to join this human and this Gabite in holy matrimony."

Sand Arrow growled and sucked on the tongue while rubbing the hard dick harder. Tiko felt around and stuck 2 fingers into her pussy. She growled while impressed with the size. 'I made a good choice.' Sand Arrow thought while Tiko spanked her ass. "Ooh!"

Sand Arrow's dad could've attacked, but let it slide.

Both moved faster as their privates started to twitch. 'This is hot as hell!' Thought both before they came together. Her juices dripped down while his sperm shot out onto her claw.

And now Sand Arrow laid down as the priest asked.

"Tiko Grey, do you take Sand Arrow as you lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?" He asked as Tiko stuck his dick deep inside Sand Arrow.

"I do."

"And do you Sand Arrow..."

"Yeah, just skip to the big kiss!"

"Very well." Said her cousin as Sand Arrow moaned loudly from Tiko's thrusting. "By the power invested in me, I pronounce you man and wife, you may kiss the bride."

Tiko grabbed the pokemon's face before pressing their lips back together while she moaned.

The witnesses all clapped before they started masterbating to the scene.

"Oh yes! Come on, move harder!"

"I'm gonna give you everything I got!" he grunted while the inside of her pussy felt like it was trying to eat his dick whole.

"Yes Tiko, I feel so loved!" she growled while her tail hit the ground.

"You better take good care of my daughter!" Said Sand Arrow's dad.

"You bet I will father-in-law." He said before thrusting even harder!

"Oh my Arceus, I think I'm gonna..." That's when Sand Arrow started glowing!

"Evolve?" teased the man.

And with that, Sand Arrow was now a Garchomp!

"I'm fully grown, now cum in me!"

"Wait, fully grown? I married you as a teenager?"

"Of course, did you really think I was a full grown woman?"

"Well now that you're fully grown, I won't have to turn myself in for statutory rape." He said as his dick twitched. "Crap! I'm gonna cum inside!"

"Do it, let's fight crime and raise a family!" she urged with a growl.

Tiko shot his 2nd deep into Sand Arrow's womb, both moaning as they all started throwing rice and cheering.

"FUCK YEAH!"

Both laid there on the road panting, basking in the afterglow as everyone cheered.

Now for the last song.

*Piano, drums and electric guitar.*

"Tiko and Arrow! Seems like I got another weird one for you both!"

"And that is chief?"

"A panty thief who says he'll blow up the city after robbing all of the big butted women of their panties, apprehend this bizarre terrorist at once!"

"We're on the case!" Said Tiko before he and his wife Sand Arrow kissed and ran out of the police station!

"Oh it's a great day." Sang Tiko.

"Gonna save this city oh yay!" Sand Arrow sang.

"Gonna beat the bad guy in our own way!" They sang in unison as trumpets started joining in.

"Ooooooh."

"Whoooa..."

"The song of a shark and her husband cop,

Our love will never choose to stop." Sang Sand Arrow.

"Love can grow anywhere and you'll enjoy what you get.

Even when the both of you only just met." Tiko sang.

"Love at 1st sight might be vulgar

And it could quickly be over

But when you feel, something true...

Your head will real, and outta the blue..." They sang together.

"That's when you realize you wanna keep that love around!

Because the love you feel is gonna make a loud sound!" That's when Sand Arrow's family, the cops, the citizens and the aliens from Tiko's cutaway all became background dancers.

"Maybe that stranger you're sitting next to will make you happy."

"But if you wanna reject that person, give 'em some good slappy."

"And if it works out, then you'll be so happy!" And then the song ends and the credits play.

In the audience, only 2 people were sitting.

"We saved this director for a crappy movie?" Complained Gary.

"I'm embarrassed that we were given cameos in this." Said Ash.

"So mother-in-law, how was the movie?" Asked the director.

"Kanjo?"

"Well, I didn't make a good movie, but at least I killed this bitch's brain cells and that's what makes me happy."

The writer of this movie was swiftly ran outta town, but he still made many more bombs to this day.