It's been a length of time since the last update (whoops), due to making some choices, but there's a good reason. This chapter is technically a paired one, with the Tournament chapter of Perne in a Gyre. Together, they're a chunky 31k words, and can be read in either order. You don't need to read the Tournament piece- the Perne in a Gyre pieces will never be actually necessary for being able to follow the main narrative- but it certainly covers the tournament from a very different viewpoint and has different scenes than are in here.

Much thanks to the strawberry-murdering Tavina and chaotic drowsyivy for beta-reading.

There was a sword swinging at me.

I need to get out of the way.

A stupid-looking sword that was still wrapped up in bandages was swinging at me.

This, again.

I burst into laughter. I couldn't help it anymore.

"Sasuke!" I could barely make out Sakura's shout.

That wasn't me, that wasn't me, that wasn't my name, I wasn't Sasuke, I couldn't be—

In front of me, Chōjūrō's eyes widened, and he twisted his arms, his grip on the hilts of his sword moving around.

I got smacked with the full flat side of the sword and fell over, the laughter and breath knocked out of me, but not for long.

"That's it?" I managed between laughs. It hurt. "That's all you're going to do?" I got to my feet, laughing and ignoring my aching side as peals of pain rippled through me with each laugh.

Chōjūrō took a step back. "'That's it?'" he repeated, sounding bewildered. "You didn't move! I could have killed you!"

"Isn't that what you're supposed to do?" I felt lightheaded. From laughing too hard? From the fake pain? "What sort of shitty ninja are you?" I giggled to myself. I took a step towards him. Chōjūrō retreated once more. I took a second step, and he did it again. I laughed harder, even as it made breathing more difficult. "Afraid?"

Chōjūrō's eyebrows crinkled together in concern and confusion, and he glanced around, the tip of his sword still pointed in my direction.

I followed his gaze.

Chōjūrō was giving the third person in the arena a pleading expression. Brown spiky hair. An ugly raised scar on the bridge of his nose and reaching into his cheek. Another what's his face.

The proctor brought his hands up before Chōjūrō could say anything. "I'm only supposed to call the match in the event it becomes apparent one of you can no longer go on and prevent any killing blows."

Chōjūrō looked horrified. "Raidō-san, he's lost his mind!" Oh, that's what it was.

Raidō shrugged. "That's not against the rules."

This was so, so stupid. None of this mattered, and yet he was so upset and concerned. Part of me felt bad for him but at the same time…

I burst into laughter again.

The aching in my side became more painful, enough that things started to no longer seem so funny, in a terrible, hideous sort of way. My chest heaved as I started to breathe more and laugh less.

Going hysterical right now wasn't really going to help me.

The pain in my side was actually really fucking awful, up there with my shoulder on its worst days, at least. I briefly imagined what would have happened if I took the edge of the blade, even wrapped, and decided I didn't want that mental image in my head at all.

Chōjūrō was still watching me, cautiously. This wasn't real. This wasn't real. It was dumb of me to feel sympathy for a dream character, and yet… I still did.

Just not enough to be willing to throw the match.

I wasn't Sasuke. I was a grown adult.

But between games and competitions with no mercy from my older cousins— and even some of the tíos and tías— when I was much younger, and then at school….

I wasn't a sore loser. I was just used to trying to win, even if it meant beating a six-year-old at a board game. Chōjūrō was neither real nor six. It'd be fine.

I was very good at trash talking.

Chōjūrō's self-confidence was somewhere below ground.

He could deal with it. He was what, sixteen?

Of course, if he couldn't deal with it, that'd certainly be one way to die. Then again, with how much my side hurt… Dying in my dreams still did not sound appealing. More like a path to making everything worse than it already was. On the other hand, Sasuke, accidentally sliced in half or smashed to bits by Chōjūrō, of all people.

I laughed, only stopping when an even sharper jag of pain hit me.

Chōjūrō looked like he was regretting this match-up.

I took a step towards him. "You can't be afraid, can you?"

He reinforced his grip on his sword. "Sasuke-kun, you're not in your right mind. You should forfeit. I don't want to hurt you when you're acting like this."

I wasn't Sasuke. I wasn't Sasuke.

"Isn't that what this is for, though? A big show for the masses with a bit of blood sport thrown in? Do you have a case of nerves when it comes to things like this?" I focused my eyes on his sword through the pain. Such a dumb shape for a sword. Fish sword. Edgy dual-wielding optional fish sword. The kind of stupid design you could only see in an anime or J-RPG. Or one of those dumb mall stores that inevitably had teenaged boys and clueless college-aged men in them to buy shitty knives that were more likely to accidentally stab them the first time they held them. "Afraid of living up to the expectations of swinging around that stupid sword?"

"Hiramekarei is a masterwork," Chōjūrō said, heat entering his voice.

"What about you, then?" I asked, singsong. "Are you worth carrying your masterwork fish-fish sword?" Fish-fish. Ha.

His eyes narrowed behind his glasses.

Was he going to rise to the bait?

Chōjūrō looked over at Raidō. "I refuse to continue this match. I forfeit."

Raidō looked between us. "Winner, Uchiha Sasuke of Konohagakure!"

Chōjūrō looked at me, something satisfied in his gaze, and carefully holstered his sword. He turned his back and walked away, heading for the stairs.

As the pain got steadily worse, I was having a hard time finding the humor from earlier. I wasn't sure it was even that funny, now.

I gripped my side, and followed after him, for lack of any other options.

I got swarmed by Team Seven by the time I got to the stairs.

Sakura was bandaged up and her clothes had puncture marks. Other than that, she looked fine, besides seeming worried. "Sasuke, you could have gotten yourself killed!"

"Yeah, what was that about?" Naruto asked.

Before I could say anything, Kakashi poked the side I had gotten hit with. I doubled up from the pain, gasping for air.

He hefted me up in a carry while I was unable to protest. "Go back to where the other genin are waiting for their matches," he told the other two. "I'll make sure Sasuke gets patched up."

"But—" Sakura started.

"I have it under control. Go back and wait with the others like you're supposed to."

Sakura stared at him, before latching onto Naruto's wrist, and dashed off, only giving Naruto long enough to go "Hey, what—" before he got yanked after her.

"Smart shinobi don't let their ribs get cracked or worse," Kakashi said, voice so flat that he almost sounded more bored than usual, as he carried me. "And they certainly don't stop in the middle of a fight to start laughing at their opponent, even if it manages to work out in their favor."

I stared at the concrete walls instead of answering. I was going insane. I had a mark on my neck that didn't belong. I was dreaming about being Sasuke. I was having dreams that hurt, right up until I woke up from them. I was missing hours of my life that were passing when I should have been asleep. Nothing made sense. And on top of that, I was dreaming about being lectured by fucking Kakashi, as though he had a sense of self-preservation.

The only way it could get worse was if the little bubble of magical ninja make-pretend in my dream cracked, and he started to lecture me for my alcohol consumption or lack of a boyfriend.

After several samey-looking corridors and a handful of staircases, he brought me to an infirmary, where there were a few medics waiting, and carefully set me on the bed that was the furthest distance from the entrance.

"He has cracked ribs on the left side at minimum and has another match ahead," Kakashi told them, completely ignoring me. "There shouldn't be enough damage to make it too complicated to heal with chakra, and this will be his first time being healed with jutsu."

I wasn't able to resist asking, even though it came out wheezy. "That's a thing?"

"Lift your arms slowly," one of the medics said as he approached, and I obeyed, looking at them both warily. He reached down, and I felt the cool metal of a zipper backing as it was pulled from the side hem of the leg of one short and up to the armpit before it was pulled upwards. I was left feeling very exposed. I had never particularly wanted to figure out how this one-piece outfit worked, and there was something particularly unsettling about feeling cool air on a bare chest.

"Besides being difficult to do, there's only so much externally caused accelerated healing the human body can take over time without causing more damage than it solves," Kakashi said, eye sweeping over my aching side. I twisted my head to look down. It was already beginning to look mottled and bruised over Sasuke's pale skin. "There's a reason so many elderly former ninja are always bandaged up. Without any other factors involved, overuse and improper healing can cause the body to stop maintaining itself in the long run, especially where old injuries were quickly healed."

I wasn't able to resist looking at the bandages wrapping both arms and legs. How did those line up with what he just said then?

The medic chuckled. "I'm not going to do anything about any shin splints or other microfractures you might have from training. Hold still."

The pain slowly subsided in favor of an awful tingling sensation that grew steadily stronger and stronger from within, and I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck prickle in response. I shuddered.

Kakashi clamped a hand down on the shoulder opposite of the side the medic was working on. "You're sensitive to healing chakra," he noted. "If you don't want to deal with it in the future, you should consider avoiding getting hit."

"Great advice," I muttered, trying to focus through the feeling that had totally consumed my side. By now, it felt like my insides there were itching, and horribly. "I'll keep that in mind for next time."

The medic pulled away. "That will do for now. You shouldn't be in any danger of your lungs getting punctured as long as you don't do anything foolish."

The itchiness faded away back into the tingling and soon stopped entirely. Everything still ached and felt sore, but at least I could breathe without that being agonizing. I eyed both the medic and Kakashi, before reaching for the side zipper and pulling it back down.

"Say thank you to the nice medic-nin," Kakashi said, eye boring down at me. He hadn't let go the whole time.

"Thanks," I grumbled.

"Good luck with your next match, Uchiha-kun."

At least Kakashi let me leave the room under my own power.

"Try to not get this injured again in your next match," he said, after we were in the outside corridor. "The only reason you were able to get patched up is because we think Orochimaru will be making his next move soon."

I didn't respond, and he didn't try to make me. Instead, he walked.

This time, I noticed that the corridors weren't completely empty. I hadn't been paying attention before. Two ninja were idling just around the other corner from the infirmary on our way out, and once we left this level, there were more at every exit that led out to the different sections of the stands.

Eventually, we reached the endpoint of this short trip. Behind another set of stairs was an exit to a smaller box of stands, an unimpressed-looking Hyūga with a severe expression blocking the way until he saw us.

Sakura and Naruto bolted past him, and Kakashi set his hands on both of their heads this time. I was perfectly fine not getting tackled into by either of them.

"Not now," Kakashi said, "He still has another match coming up."

"Yeah, Lee just beat the crap out of his opponent," Naruto said. "He got hit by even more senbon than Sakura did and kept going anyways. Fighting him's gonna suck."

"He probably won't go that hard against another Konoha-nin," Sakura added. "I'm sure it won't be that bad." She looked up at Kakashi for hopeful confirmation.

"Gai doesn't believe in holding back, so yes, he will," Kakashi corrected.

Sakura's smile turned into a grimace. "Oh. Never mind, then."

"Thanks," I said, voice flat. Even knowing that Lee as Sasuke's next match wasn't a good matchup for Sasuke, along with the fact that I wasn't exactly interested in fighting, I still felt weirdly insulted.

"You all should go back in, they'll be bringing you lunch soon enough," Kakashi said. He decided to change the line of discussion. "Naruto, Sasuke, try to not eat too much. It won't look good on either of you if you end up throwing up in the middle of your matches." His brow furrowed slightly. "And if you do, try to not throw up on your opponent."

"Would something happen if we do?" Naruto asked.

Kakashi stared at Naruto for a moment, clearly trying to formulate a response. "Generally speaking, people don't appreciate being puked on. If you absolutely have to, save it for when it's actually an enemy combatant," he ended up going with.

"That's disgusting." I had no problem with sharing that opinion, considering Sakura looked at least as grossed out as I felt at that idea.

She gave Kakashi a concerned look. "Do people really do that?"

"It's been known to happen." He shrugged slightly. "People also don't really like seeing it happen."

"I'd hope not!" Sakura looked very scandalized.

"Or like to step in it." Kakashi paused for a moment. "At least, I don't like stepping in it. Bisuke vomited in my spare sandals once. I didn't find out until I tried to put them on."

Sakura and Naruto made disgusted noises before Naruto started to look confused. "Wait, how did you not notice? Doesn't it smell? Aren't you supposed to have a good sense of smell?"

"Ah, that's a story for another day," Kakashi answered suddenly before any more questions could occur, and he grappled my shoulder and Naruto's, squeezed Sakura between us, and started to direct us towards the competitor's box. "Go back in, good luck, don't overeat and puke on anyone, and don't get hurt."

He disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"Every time we start to find out more about him," Sakura grumbled, as we went past the Hyūga guarding the archway.

Even though I was already sort of aware of who should have been competing, I hadn't realized that the ninja from Ame who had gotten this far were the ones that I was pretty sure Gaara had crushed to death in the show. Did those guys even have names?

Pretty much all the ones who were in the tournament were keeping to themselves or their teams, for the most part. Neji and Tenten were on the other side, where Neji made it very clear he was not paying attention to me, visibly straightening up and speaking just slightly louder to Tenten. Chōjūrō gave me an unimpressed look, before returning his attention to talking to Haku. Shino nodded towards me in acknowledgment, and Hinata smiled— at least up until Naruto grinned back. Kiba sniggered until Shino said something too quiet to hear, at which point he shut up. Shikamaru was noticeably alone, leaning on the railing, looking out at the rest of the stands.

"How do you not notice dog puke?" Naruto was still baffled. "I mean, Kiba let Akamaru puke in the classroom one day right when we were all leaving and Iruka-sensei wasn't there so nobody cleaned it, and it was still really smelly the next morning, and we all got yelled at for leaving it there."

Kiba looked over. "I didn't let him do anything! Akamaru got sick from eating something he wasn't supposed to. It's not my fault he didn't tell me he puked!" Akamaru, resting on Kiba's lap, barked.

Sakura grimaced. "We're going to be eating lunch soon!"

Naruto looked thoughtful, which I doubted would lead to anything good. "Hey! Hey! Haku?"

Haku looked over. Suigetsu took the chance to stick his tongue out at Haku, which got him smacked by Chōjūrō. "Yes, Naruto?"

"Uh, how hard are you gonna go during our fight?"

Haku considered for a moment. "I won't be trying to kill you, but I'll still be doing my best to win." He returned his attention to his conversation with Chōjūrō.

Naruto blinked, looked between us, and made a face of his own. "Okay then, no lunch."

Sakura squinted at him suspiciously but didn't ask.

I decided against asking as well; I wasn't interested in the contents of Naruto's stomach in any capacity, fictional or dreamt up. Or—

I shut that thought down entirely. I refused to think about it.

Instead, I went and sat in the corner of the stands, tucked behind the entrance, Sakura and Naruto following me even though they had no need to do so.

Lee and an Ame-nin— presumably the one he fought against— entered the space. Lee's jumpsuit was slightly peppered with holes, like Sakura, but he was grinning. The Ame-nin didn't look pleased, head hanging low as he sulked over to where the other two were. It was obvious who won from that alone.

Tenten still hopped up from where she was sitting to excitedly go, "Lee! That was great!"

Lee stayed where he was standing, and gave her a wide grin. "I am sure your match will go well, too!" He scoped around before his eyes settled on me. "Sasuke-kun! You may have used cunning tactics to get through your first match, but they will not work on me! I hope you are ready for a full fight in ours!"

Oh, I was screwed. There was no way Sasuke was able to win against Lee normally. Dream Sasuke had no Sharingan, as far as I was able to tell, and no one had said anything about the seal— No, I wasn't thinking about that. I refused.

I was just going to be resigned to a Sasuke pancake. Uchiha roadkill.

Sakura's quiet, nervous laugh with a whispered "Oh no" didn't help.

Neither did Naruto, who was squinting at Lee, when he went, "Uh, Lee? Are your wraps supposed to be bleeding? 'Cuz they are."

Lee brought his hands up to look at them and his arms, flexing his fingers back and forth from an open palm to fist. They were fully wrapped, but pinpricks of red were starting to show through the top layer. "Oh! They are! Thank you for letting me know, Naruto-kun! The medic-nin in the infirmary told me that the senbon punctures aren't that serious."

Sakura's wide smile was halfway between that and a grimace. "There are a lot of veins in the hands, so they can be pretty bloody. Maybe you should… stop flexing them? Give them a chance to scab? Or something?"

"Oh, it'll be fine! I'm used to it! I don't want them to scab over just yet, it'll make it harder to punch." Lee gave her an encouraging smile, which wasn't, and went to sit down with his teammates.

Sakura turned to look at me, her expression still faintly horrified. "Um, Sasuke?"

I was feeling mildly grossed out. "Don't say anything." I did not want to think about the inevitable, horrible rapidly closing future of this dream, which was apparently going to involve my ass getting beaten by Lee with his still-bleeding fists. Unfortunately, this one was much harder to shake because I wasn't able to stop myself from repeatedly glancing in Team Gai's direction and the growing pinpricks of red that were Lee's wrapped hands.

There was movement and slightly muffled speaking from the other side of the Hyūga at the entrance way, and a group of three kids that looked roughly the same age as the rookies came in, followed by a somewhat older bored-looking guy in a flak jacket who looked roughly college age. The only thing that really stood out about him was the tattoo on one cheek. He was carrying a large portable drink dispenser and a plastic sleeve of paper cups in his arms. The kids were carrying bento boxes. Lunch had arrived.

Sakura tensed up next to me the moment the one, a girl with purple hair, entered.

The purple-haired girl distributed the bento boxes she was carrying to Team Gai and the Ame ninja before she swung over towards us. The slight smirk on her face and the way her eyes narrowed at Sakura made me suspicious. Wasn't Sakura supposed to have had bullies in the academy, or something?

"I heard you lost your first match, Forehead," the girl crooned. She fluttered her eyes at me. "I'm sure you're going to make chūnin, Sasuke-kun."

Oh. Before Naruto or Sakura could say anything, I spoke up. "Who are you?"

The girl's expression faltered. She wasn't expecting that question. "I'm Ami, remember? We were classmates."

"I didn't realize you passed." I looked over at the oldest member of the little group she had come in with. "He must be really good, to teach a genin team this young." I was pretty sure that he was probably just a chūnin. He looked bored out of his mind, if tense.

"He's a chūnin. My jōnin-sensei failed our team. We just got done with the extra courses. I'm working in Supply, now." Ami's expression was slowly turning to one of upset. I should have felt worse about messing with what was effectively a middle schooler, but like real ones sometimes did, she was behaving like a little shit and was under the assumption she would be able to get away with it. I might have been losing my mind, but I refused to put up with what was in most ways a particularly uppity seventh-grader.

"So, you don't have a jōnin-sensei," I started. Ami nodded hesitantly. I could tell she knew that somehow this had backfired on her, but wasn't sure how to fix it. "I'm sure you're learning plenty of things in Supply. Kind of strange that you're trying to give Sakura a hard time. She's the one who's got this far. So, again, who are you?"

Ami looked like I had slapped her.

I opened my mouth to start again, but before I could, Sakura cut me off. "Sasuke, stop." Her words were surprisingly sure. She gazed at Ami, setting her shoulders. "I don't know why you're trying to do this, but just leave me alone, okay? We aren't in the academy anymore." Sakura's expression grew self-conscious, and she pressed splayed fingers together. "Ino told me that you got assigned to Supply after you were done with the remedial classes at the Academy since you weren't able to get a jōnin-sensei a second time, and she thought I'd like to hear it since you kept bragging and all when we were in school, but you know what? It didn't make me feel happy."

"It didn't?"

"No. It made me feel kind of sad for you. But I thought that once we were all finished and stuff, that well, I didn't expect that we could be friends or anything, but I thought that you'd just move on." Sakura's eyes narrowed even as it was obvious she was doing her best to stay calm. "We've already had to fight for our lives, but you're still trying to push me around and be mean like we're eight still. Don't you think it's time to grow up, already?"

Ami's face turned red and looking around, it was clear that whether or not Sakura wanted it, everyone in hearing range was paying attention. "Yeah, well, you probably only got this far because of Sasuke!" Ami turned on her heel and fled, pushing out and past the guard.

The chūnin with the water dispenser sighed and rolled his eyes. "Nichika, can you go run after her?"

One of the other genin nodded and ran off.

A few minutes after, Sakura giggled, barely audible but with an edge of panic to it. "I can't believe I did that! I can't believe I said that!" Her sandaled feet pattered on the ground as she lightly kicked them. Even though she was trying to calm herself down from what was a big deal to her, Sakura seemed more dazed from this than the first encounter with Zabuza or any of the changes that had come from that. Then again, thirteen-year-olds weren't known for having reasonable priorities when it came to things or how they impacted their feelings.

"Yeah, well, she deserved it," Naruto said. "She's a jerk and used to pick on anyone she could. She used to tell people I was a smelly orphan and no one wanted me because I didn't know how to shower or do anything right." While there was a veneer of casualness to Naruto's words, he wasn't meeting Sakura's eyes, instead looking up at the ceiling. Considering that Naruto hadn't been all that smelly in these dreams so far without good cause, and Naruto's reaction just now, that had been meant to hurt without any regard for being true.

"She used to say that? That was from her?" Sakura looked shocked.

"Well, it's not like you would have heard it from her since she was always mean to you, too," Naruto answered.

"Don't bother thinking about her," I said. "She's not worth it." Suddenly I felt like I hadn't gone far enough, which was absurd. I was more than twice their age. I was better than revenge bullying even a figment of my imagination.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Sakura answered. Her eyes flicked to meet mine. "Um. Thanks. It means a lot." Her words were a bit quieter than they had been before.

"You're welcome." I had no idea what else to say.

Instead, I looked at the bento out of curiosity. I didn't know what to expect. The box was sort of cute, in a plain way. I had always had school lunches as a kid, except for the rare school field trip when I got to buy delicious, terrible junk like Lunchables. I had given up on bringing my own lunches when I was in college when a container of spaghetti opened up in my backpack during my very first semester. I opened it up.

It had been more appetizing when it was left closed. The rice inside was… concerning. Half of it was visibly crunchy looking, and the other half was partially overcooked and looked almost slimy. It was matched with a bed of sad-looking, overcooked vegetables, and slices of breaded chicken that had absorbed some of the moisture from the rest of the food and was equally sad and soggy on top of it.

I poked at one of the slices of chicken with my finger. It left a mushy indent in the breading.

Naruto leaned over to look and grimaced. "Are you really going to eat that?" he tried to whisper. His eyes flitted up to look at the chūnin who was staying here for the foreseeable future. "Because that looks really gross."

"It's not my problem if you don't eat," the chūnin said. "It's still better than field rations if you're gonna complain."

Sakura opened hers up. It didn't look any more appetizing at a slight distance.

Naruto leaned over, and before I could think to stop him, poked his own finger into a different slice of chicken and patted the whole layer of food. His hand came up with bits of rice and the breading stuck to it. "Wow, gross. Even I can cook better than this."

"Hey!" I smacked his hand away. "Give me yours now, I don't know where your hands have been." I drew the line of the indignities so far at letting Naruto play with something I was supposed to eat. Even if it was a dream, that was just slightly too gross. My life was terrible enough as it was without consuming Naruto's germs in what was a delusion. If it wasn't—

If it wasn't, I didn't want to think about that, but it was even more reason to not suffer Naruto's hands on my food.

He made a sulky expression but handed it over.

I shoved the one he had touched at him.

I was at least experienced enough in eating questionable food, but I still went and got a flimsy cup of water to go with it. It was easier to choke things down with something to drink.

It was interesting to look around to see who was or wasn't eating.

Tenten and Neji weren't, but Lee was. Tenten seemed too antsy to eat, occasionally standing up to pace. Chōjūrō and Haku were, but Suigetsu wasn't, instead just drinking water. He wasn't bothering to hide his disgusted expression whenever he looked at the open bento balanced on Chōjūrō's knee. At one point, I thought I caught Chōjūrō rolling his eyes. All of the Ame team were, without any sign that they were unimpressed. Hinata also wasn't, but she had given hers to Kiba, who had mixed up some of the rice and chicken for Akamaru. Shino had his open but seemed to be contemplating it. Shikamaru hadn't even bothered to open his.

Sakura made attempts at nibbling but had pretty much given up on it, in favor of asking the chūnin questions about working in Supply.

Kokage, the chūnin, wasn't usually in Supply, apparently. He had returned from a long-term mission— nothing serious, just gone for over a year in some village— and after some time off, had been reassigned to work in Supply for the next several months to give him time to recondition and train before he went on missions outside of Konoha again. After a few months of shorter-term missions, he'd be up for longer ones again.

It felt like the time went faster than not, and soon enough the bento— whether still full, half-eaten, or empty— were all collected by the single remaining genin and they left. The water dispenser was left behind, along with the stack of flimsy paper cups.

Naruto was bouncing in place by the time it was obvious the matches were going to start again, and Sakura leaned over to try to squash him down.

"If you keep up like this, you're going to be tired before your match even starts!"

Naruto laughed and rubbed the back of his neck.

The next match was between Kiba and Suigetsu. Neither of them seemed to be taking the other that seriously, and both had a little swagger to them as they got up to leave. Typical teenaged boy kind of nonsense.

"Good luck," Hinata said before Kiba got to the door.

Kiba laughed and gave her a toothy smirk. "He's the one who's going to need the luck!" Akamaru barked.

Suigetsu glared at him. "You're the one who can't even fight on his own."

As if to punctuate this, instead of bothering with the long route, Suigetsu swung himself off the railing, landing on the ground far below.

Kiba seemed to have no interest in being outdone because he jumped right after.

Okay, teenaged ninja boy kind of nonsense. I wasn't sure even the dumbest and most foolhardy of the boys I knew in middle school or high school would have done that, and I knew someone who had broken both of their legs jumping off the second story of another friend's house in their attempt to bounce from a trampoline into a pool in the summer between eighth grade and freshman year.

I resisted getting up from where I was to go stand at the rails. I could see fine from here, but even so, something niggled at me. I could get a better view if I stand.

I decided to ignore the temptation.

Below, the fight began.

Suigetsu started with being an asshole right off the bat. I wasn't surprised, but at the same time- actually, no, he was a little shit. It wasn't beyond him at all to be making jeering comments about whom— or rather, what— Kiba's mom was willing to sleep with.

Then again, Kiba had started it by asking which of Suigetsu's parents was the fish fucker.

He just hadn't been prepared for Suigetsu to be the bigger asshole.

Suigetsu was keeping the upper hand, but it didn't look like it was staying that way for long. Kiba shouted an order to Akamaru, and the dog disappeared into a cloud of smoke and a second Kiba appeared. Both of them were visibly snarling at Suigetsu before they charged at Suigetsu, twisting around each other, sending up clouds of dust. Occasionally I could make out glints of metal.

Before they reached Suigetsu, water surged out of nowhere, sweeping them away.

"What!?" Naruto's eyes widened. "I thought he was just, you know, bragging about that."

I shrugged.

Just as suddenly as it appeared, most of it disappeared, a stream of water returning to Suigetsu, extending from his arms.

One of the Kibas disappeared, turning back into Akamaru.

Kiba threw the dog into the air, and Akamaru tumbled in the air, sticking a leg out.

Sakura made a disgusted sound, and Naruto laughed. I just stared in disbelief as the pee flowed in the arena below, hitting the water.

Akamaru landed.

Suigetsu screamed in outrage.

I looked away. I wasn't the only one. Hinata had ducked her head, and Shino was shaking his. Haku's expression was carefully neutral. Most of the others seemed to be a mix of grossed out or amused. The shortest Ame-nin was sniggering.

"Kiba, don't you dare!" A woman's voice shouted, surprisingly loud enough to make out without any problem. Even the rudest comments from Kiba and Suigetsu had barely carried.

I looked to see and made a face.

Kiba had approached Suigetsu, his hands definitely on his pants zip.

Suigetsu leapt at Kiba and Akamaru with too-large fists, clubbing them down so hard that neither got back up. Akamaru's yelp of pain had carried up enough for us to hear.

I winced.

"Winner, Suigetsu!"

What's-his-face— Raidō?— still had to grab Suigetsu around the chest to pull him away, disappearing out of sight and reappearing the next at the exit from the arena's ground.

"Oh man, Kiba got his ass kicked," Naruto said.

"He shouldn't have had Akamaru pee on him. Or tried it himself." Sakura's lip was still curled in disgust. "No one deserves that."

"It was a bad move," Shino said, voice serious.

There was a moment of quiet. Below, medics entered and took Kiba and Akamaru out.

"Hey, Suigetsu can turn himself into water and stuff, right? And Akamaru's piss hit the bit of water that was going back to him, yeah?" Naruto asked. His brows were scrunched together in thought. "Does that mean—"

Sakura slapped a hand over Naruto's mouth. "Don't even finish that question; no one wants to think about— eugh! Naruto!" She pulled her hand away, and immediately wiped it on Naruto's pant leg. "Someday you're going to lick a paralytic or something if you keep that up," she grumbled. "I would have been able to use one if it weren't for the rule changes…"

Naruto squinted at her, before he stuck his tongue out and flipped his jacket's collar up, and pushed the fuzzy white part of it up against his tongue, rubbing it against it. He made a gagging noise and coughed when he finally closed his mouth, spitting out some white fuzz.

"If she did have any traces of poison on her hands, I don't think cleaning your tongue off like that would work…" At least, I didn't think it would.

Sakura looked incredibly off-put at the suggestion of sloppiness, or something, on her part.

Shikamaru slouched his way out to the stairs, and Hinata followed. Shikamaru looked like he would have preferred to be anywhere else, in a tired and hollow sort of way that didn't look right on a kid his age. Hinata looked like a bundle of nerves.

"Hinata," I called out, on impulse.

She stopped before she reached her clan member guarding the door. "Sasuke-kun? What is it?"

"You'll do fine, just relax a little."

She loosened up a little bit, enough to almost begin to smile, when Naruto spoke up, enthusiastic. "Yeah! You've got this! Kick Shikamaru's lazy ass!"

Hinata fled, but didn't escape before a blush started to flood her face.

"Huh. Wonder why she ran. It's not like they're gonna start the match without her and Shikamaru takes forever going anywhere anyway. She's really weird sometimes," Naruto commented.

Over his head, Sakura mouthed 'How is he this hopeless?' at me.

I shrugged.

Suigetsu sulked past the entry. He was still visibly angry, a glower set on his face.

Naruto straightened up. "Hey, hey! Suigetsu!"

Suigetsu looked over. "What?"

"Hey, since you turn into water does that mean—"

"Shut up!" Suigetsu's voice cracked, his indignance making him screechy. "I don't want to think about it!" His face was slowly turning pink.

"But—"

"Please be nice to my teammate, Naruto-kun," Haku spoke up.

Suigetsu stomped past us to go continue sulking against the back wall.

Below, Hinata and Shikamaru had finally reached the ground.

It was pretty boring. Instead of either of them doing anything, they were circling, facing each other, Hinata having opened the distance between them. Shikamaru was barely doing anything besides making sure he was staying focused on her.

"Ugh," went Sakura. "I don't know why Hinata's not going for it. Shikamaru's bad at taijutsu…"

Hinata finally started to get into striking range, and at the same time she did, Shikamaru's shadow stretched towards her.

So much for wishing Hinata luck.

The shadow reached Hinata, and Hinata was stilled.

Shikamaru's messed up. Wait, no. Is he trying to lose the match on purpose?

Hinata started to move again, and Shikamaru's shadow snapped back. He stumbled backward a few feet.

The distance closed. Hinata's moves were cautious, and Shikamaru was avoiding them, but not doing much to try to attack her. Even from where I was I could see they were talking, just barely audible from up here. This time I couldn't resist, I went up to the railing. Sakura and Naruto joined me.

"…not fighting?" Hinata asked. It was just loud enough to hear, barely.

I squinted. Shikamaru was speaking, but not quite loud enough for me to make out everything he was saying. "…to try? I thought… …not that good… …want me to take it easy since you're just a girl."

I winced. Shikamaru was vaguely sexist, wasn't he? At the same time, this was… This was definitely stupid. Impressively stupid. Offensively dumb, even.

Hinata started to beat the shit out of him, which he deserved, after whatever that was supposed to be. Gentleness only went so far, and it seemed that Shikamaru's attitude had pushed past the limits of what Hinata was willing to accept from others.

Shikamaru was forced onto defense, repeatedly barely dodging Hinata. Even then it was obvious that Shikamaru wasn't on the same level as she was; Hinata's moves flowed from one into the other, almost mesmerizing, until she got a quick hit that took out one of Shikamaru's arms. The boy tried to use it to block the rest as he backed away.

Sakura winced. "What did he even say to her? Hinata's really going for it."

"He tried to frame it that he was taking it easy on her because she's a girl," I answered.

"Wait, really?" Sakura made a face. "Get him, Hinata!" she shouted over the side.

Another strike to a leg sent Shikamaru down on one knee.

Shikamaru forfeited, and Hinata was declared the winner. Shikamaru was taken out on a stretcher.

I had not been expecting that.

I glanced in Neji's direction. He didn't seem all that happy about Hinata's win, but that wasn't a surprise, considering all of his own issues there. Without his big fight against Naruto, Neji was probably going to be stuck with them unresolved and still bitter if they somehow didn't get straightened out with age. If he was real, I doubt they would be able to; Neji wasn't just filled with righteousness, he was also skilled enough and smart enough to generally not have anyone be able to smack sense into his head. I knew people who had been like that in high school who had never grown out of it, so unwilling to take the chips out of their shoulders that they refused to change. Unfortunate for him.

Tenten and one of the Ame-nin got up and left; their turn then.

Hinata and Kiba- with Akamaru- entered. Kiba was carrying what looked like an ice pack and had the start of a black eye.

"—can't believe I missed you winning," Kiba said.

"Hinata had to do a good job, after you embarrassed us," Shino spoke up.

Hinata flushed slightly and looked at the ground. "It was just luck."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. "Don't talk about yourself like that. Luck plays a role, but you're the one who still did everything."

She only turned pinker. "I still could have done better."

Kiba rolled his own. "Yeah, yeah, but you won, and the rest of us didn't, so you better win against Suigetsu for me and Shino, okay?"

Hinata scuffed her foot across the floor. "We'll see…"

On the other side of the room, Suigetsu scoffed, but didn't say anything.

Below, the next match got underway.

The ninja from Ame pulled out his umbrella and aimed it at Tenten, who had a scroll which quickly was unfurled in her hand.

Sakura made a noise of shock. "He can't seriously be aiming that directly at her! Why isn't the proctor doing anything?"

It became obvious soon enough; the dense volley of senbon was getting sucked into the scroll and being sealed into it. The Ame-nin shouted.

Naruto grimaced. "That's expensive…"

"Yeah, especially for something like this," Sakura agreed. "I don't think they're going to make Tenten give them back."

Tenten tossed that scroll to the side, pulling out another. A polearm with a blade popped out, and she swung it at her charging opponent, who had decided to approach with another umbrella. The umbrella handle got sliced in half.

It was almost comedic; he kept trying to get through Tenten's defenses, but Tenten would deflect him, pop out a scroll, and use the next set of weapons that came out.

"How does she know how to use so many weapons?" Naruto said out loud.

"Tenten wants to be an expert with all ninja tools," Lee spoke up, stepping over towards us. "A lot of our work with Gai-sensei has been for our teamwork skills and conditioning, but because Tenten wants to have such a wide specialty, she regularly does even more training without us with other ninja in the village who do have weapon specialties." Lee's voice was filled with admiration. "Everything she makes goes right into her weapons fund."

"That has to add up," Sakura said, wide-eyed. "My parents are making me put most of my pay into savings. I only get to have a bit more than my old allowance was. She's lucky she gets to spend it however she wants." There was a tinge of envy to her voice.

"Savings?" Naruto looked between me and Sakura, eyes slightly squinting in confusion. Instead of saying anything more, he sidled off to lean on the rail, still squinting in thought.

I decided I didn't want to know what that was even supposed to imply.

In being distracted by Naruto and Sakura, I had missed part of the fight below. At some point in the last few seconds, Tenten had pulled a spear out. The Ame-nin's hat had been knocked off his head, and the spear aimed at his face.

Tenten won.

The dance she did, obviously bouncing up and down for a bit in excitement, was cute, especially when followed by the immediate rush to collect all the scrolls and weapons she had littered around the ground.

Naruto swallowed, loud enough to hear.

He straightened up and immediately forced a broad grin on his face. "Look! It's my turn now!" Following his moment of nerves so obviously, his bravado wasn't as believable as it might have been.

Haku walked over, directing a smile towards Naruto. "Are you ready, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto laughed, loud and much harder than necessary. "Yeah! Of course I am! Are you?"

Haku nodded.

Naruto managed to shuffle himself out of the competitor stands, eyes wide with the sort of expression I remembered from middle school performances and high school presentations, back visibly steeled.

Haku at least looked more relaxed as he exited.

"Naruto looked nervous," Sakura said, eyebrows slightly furrowed with concern. "I hope he doesn't let it get to him."

"He'll probably be fine as long as he doesn't puke from nerves when the match starts," I decided. I had had classes from fourth grade until I graduated from high school with a boy who, every year without fail, needed to throw up before any class presentation or performance. It wouldn't have been so bad if it weren't for the fact we were both on violin in orchestra together. I stopped playing in high school because the thought of spending another four years, with even more performances, of him having to constantly throw up was too much.

Guitar had been far more enjoyable, especially without the haunting specter of Jaime threatening to throw up.

Tenten did a happy little twirl when she came back in, before coming over to join Lee and us at the railing. Her opponent just looked glum.

Naruto and Haku's match started.

Of course, Naruto started by pumping out dozens of clones.

Haku went from standing still to running full speed, running back and forth through the clones, striking down the ones that attempted to take him down or tackle him.

I didn't know shit about strategy, but even I could tell that Naruto was using his brain down there— or at least trying to. Haku just obviously had the upper hand, even with all of Naruto's clones. Eventually, they were whittled down to just Naruto and Haku again, and the extended loop of Haku blocking and dodging all of the Naruto clones suddenly took a detour.

Naruto rocketed into the air, up well past the upper heights of the stadium walls and stands.

Sakura laughed in surprise, her own concerns mostly forgotten.

"What's he doing?" Lee wondered.

"He's not dumb enough to launch himself into the air like that without someway to land safely, right?" Kiba asked. "It's Naruto but… He can't really be that dumb, can he?"

"Naruto's not dumb," Sakura spoke up, defensively. "He's awful at a lot of academic stuff, but he's not that stupid. No one goes around calling you stupid, and you almost failed the graduation exam, too."

Naruto's arc through the air was impressive, and as he sped back down towards the earth, he created more clones, using those to hurtle himself at the walls, where he started to run around them, just beneath the stands.

Haku was just standing in the middle of the arena, probably out of a combination of surprise and limited options, if he didn't want to risk injuring the crowd by chance or severely hurting Naruto.

A flash of blond hair sped right beneath us, and a moment after that, laughter. Naruto jumped from the wall, visible from under the closest set of spectator stands, aiming right for Haku.

Sheets of ice immediately began to close around the two of them. Haku's ice mirror attack, I realized, just as Haku disappeared into them, multiple reflections of him facing Naruto.

The match ended not long after that, Haku jumping out from behind Naruto, putting the younger boy in a hold, a shimmering shard of ice held to Naruto's throat.

Kiba forced himself over, intruding on my personal space. "Since when did Naruto get that good?" he demanded.

Shino moved to join us, which did not make it any better. There was a slight tip upwards of Shino's head, probably meant as a visible context clue that he was rolling his eyes. "We've all improved since the academy," he commented. "It only makes sense that Naruto would too, especially with everything that's happened around his team in the last few months. Besides, he still lost."

"Only 'cause there's no way his opponent is 'just' a genin," Kiba pointed out. "The only reason Haku's even in the exams is probably to rub it in everybody's nose and make it obvious those guys aren't gonna be rolled over so easy." He glanced over at Chōjūrō and Suigetsu, and made a rude gesture.

"Fuck off," Suigetsu muttered under his breath.

I looked around. No one was showing any sign of going anywhere, and I could see that the stands for the audience were emptying the way they had earlier.

"I still can't believe they're stretching it out so much," Sakura said, stretching her arms out. "A whole hour until the next set of matches start…"

"At least after these we'll be done for the day," Tenten said. "I know they made it two days because there are so many of us, but it's still nerve-wracking." She let out a laugh. "I'm not sure if I want to win my next match or lose. The idea of a second day of all of this is too much!"

"Aren't there supposed to be even more people watching tomorrow?" Chōjūrō spoke up finally. "I heard your daimyo is supposed to make an appearance."

"He is?" Hinata's voice slightly squeaked.

"Oh, ugh," Sakura went, exaggerating a shudder. "I think I'm happy I lost my match, now…"

Naruto sprung in, bouncing. "Hey, hey, you guys saw that, right? Right?" All of his earlier nerves had worn off.

Haku trailed behind him, looking very amused. "It was a very surprising tactic, Naruto-kun. I wasn't prepared for that."

"Yeah! And you still won but!" Naruto punctuated his words with excited bouncing. "I went up! So high! I could see most of the village! Like I was up on the Hokage monument!"

"Yeah yeah, we saw," Suigetsu said. "You better not spend the next hour talking about only that."

I peeled away from the railing to go sit in the back corner against the wall, leaving Sakura to talk with Tenten.

With the first round out of the way, the team divisions looked like they had dissolved. Probably because they didn't matter as much at this point, now that half of the people in this space knew they weren't moving on.

Shino and Hinata drifted over to sit by me, Hinata managing to give me a small smile as she did.

"The tactics you used against your last opponent won't work again," Shino said, in what seemed like it was supposed to pass as a conversation starter. "Have you thought about what you're going to do for your next match?"

Get squashed.

I shrugged. "Should I?"

Shino made a thoughtful sound in the back of his throat, before speaking again. "True, you're probably going to lose whatever you do. He's older than us, had an extra year to train, focuses entirely on taijutsu, and his pain tolerance seems to be obscene. You've already been injured, and he took a whole volley of senbon without flinching. You'd have to take drastic measures in order to win against him, and those would likely be against the rules we're supposed to be following. It wouldn't look good against another Leaf-nin," Shino said. His voice had a meaningful tone to it, and he glanced at Neji with enough of a disapproving look that it creased his brows together. "You should still fight, but you should just hope it ends as painlessly as possible for you."

Wonderful advice. I was screwed.

Hinata pressed her fingers together, looking down. "I'm sorry Neji-nii-san's attack caused so much harm to your colony, Shino…" Her words were soft.

Oh, that would explain it, if Neji did something to Shino's bugs.

"He's the one who did it, not you."

"Yeah," I seconded. "You shouldn't be apologizing."

Hinata didn't seem very convinced, but she didn't try to insist.

Shikamaru entered, followed by his dad, whose hand was on his shoulder. His arm and leg were bandaged up now, after his fight. Shikaku— I was pretty sure I was remembering that one right— looked amused when Shikamaru faltered for a moment, looking at Hinata with a cautious look. Shikaku released Shikamaru, but not without a slight push.

"Hinata-chan?" Shikamaru started.

Hinata turned and looked up, frowning at the sound of Shikamaru's voice. That was new. "Yes, Shikamaru-kun?" Her response was almost frosty by anyone else's standards, but for her, it was impressively cold.

Shikamaru trained his eyes on the wall behind me instead of looking at Hinata. "I'm sorry I tried to frame throwing the match as a favor to you because you're a girl." He was visibly cringing. "If I didn't want to fight, I should have said as much before the match started, instead. You still earned your win, because your techniques can overpower mine."

Wow, how incredibly embarrassing. Everything about this screamed parental intervention. Poor Shikamaru. Dreaming about being Sasuke was a step up from what Shikamaru was being put through right now.

Hinata didn't say anything for a few seconds, just observing Shikamaru without any nervous habit occupying her hands or taking over her body language. Eventually, she spoke. "I accept your apology."

Shikamaru managed a muttered thanks and went off to sit by the rails, letting his legs hang over the side.

The moment Shikamaru had turned around and was sufficiently far away, Hinata had let out a small wordless noise and her shoulders immediately slumped down from all of the tension in them being let go of in one go. Much like Sakura, it seemed that Hinata hadn't thought she had had that in her, either.

"Thank you for accepting Shikamaru's apology, Hinata-chan," Shikaku told her.

She turned pink and mumbled something that I couldn't quite make out.

Shikaku, if nothing else, looked amused. He pushed his hands into his pockets and looked around at all of the kids. "You all should be proud of yourselves for getting this far," he said.

Kiba made an unimpressed noise. "We were told we only got to this point because they would have run preliminaries but canceled it." Akamaru let out a bark.

Shikaku snorted. "Being eliminated from the tournament this early or even from the second exam wouldn't necessarily prevent you from picking up chūnin."

Shino tilted his head upwards to look at Shikaku. "Nara-san, how often do genin get promoted? The attrition rates we've seen from the exam so far do not hold up to how many chūnin there are within the village, or even for the villages of the ones who arrived to take it."

A smirk played on Shikaku's lips. "You picked that up, did you?"

It was kind of hilarious to see how suddenly the attention of all of the genin in the room shifted to Shikaku and Shino. Even Shikamaru.

"Well, you all have already gotten this far, and it's not like you won't figure it out eventually," he began. "Do you want it ruined for you?"

"You can't just say that and not tell us!" Tenten pleaded.

"The chūnin exams aren't the only way to be promoted, even though we tell you it is. That goes for the other villages as well."

It was no longer 'kind of', but fully hilarious. The Ame team seemed to be the only ones entirely unsurprised by this. Chōjūrō also seemed aware, but Suigetsu was staring at Shikaku with his mouth agape.

"This horseshit was optional the whole time!?"

"No," Shikaku corrected, firmly. "You still need to be considered eligible and nominated for the exams at all to be promoted in the first place, at least in Konoha. The mission requirements for entering the exams are considered the absolute minimum floor of experience needed for a chūnin. Being entered in the exams is still important to every participating village, and it's vital to take it seriously."

"Still have to remind people you're around and useful if you want their money," I wryly commented. At least, I assumed that was the main logic.

"What? But that's dumb," Naruto said, wrinkling his nose. "Why would we need to do that?"

"Because it's easy to ignore us when they don't need us," Shino said. He tilted his head up to look directly at Shikaku, presumably seeking confirmation, though he looked like he wanted to say more. Shikaku gave him a small nod. "Fire isn't at war, and neither are any of the countries that border us. There haven't been any natural disasters either."

"That's right," Shikaku confirmed. "While Hidden Villages are able to provide ninja for missions to whoever is willing to hire us, there are still limits on how far that can go or even how much money that brings in, like your little mission to Wave." Shikaku's eyes met Naruto's and Sakura's, and then mine, clear amusement in his eyes. "We're much more dependent on the Daimyo's court and government than we cover when you're all in the academy."

Which made sense. It wasn't like we expected the average middle schooler to have a firm grasp on government or economics. It was just unfortunate that there were plenty of people who had never bothered to learn more than the basics covered in sixth-grade social studies.

Naruto squinted up at Shikaku, visibly trying to think. "So… we're risking our lives for… what?"

"Probably shit like electricity, plumbing, and roads," Suigetsu said. He was looking at Shikaku as well, visibly frowning. "Everything here is nice. There hasn't been a single power outage or water notice since we've been here. In Kiri, all of that's unreliable if you don't live in one of the important districts or buildings."

"Oh. What's a water notice for?" Naruto asked.

Chōjūrō spoke up. "It's what they send out when you shouldn't be drinking the water because it's unsafe for some reason. Like if the water pipes have broken and taken in sewage. Again."

Sakura eyed the Kiri-nin with concern in her eyes. "How often does that happen?"

"Enough," Chōjūrō said. "You're better off just buying water instead of using it from the pipes unless you want a side of sewer gunk."

The rippling reaction of disgust included even the Ame team.

"No wonder Kiri has so many missing-nin," the one Gaara had squished in the show said. "That would never happen in Ame. We wouldn't allow it." The tone of righteousness was impressive.

"Wonderful for you," Suigetsu muttered. "What the fuck doesn't Ame have?"

Shikaku coughed, probably trying to not laugh. "The money we receive from Fire's government does go to things like the village's infrastructure in return for us providing people to the capital in return and other things, you're right. In times of peace, like right now, it's easy for them to begin to forget. Even with the security concerns going on right now, it was decided that the consequences of canceling the tournament portion would be greater than continuing with it at this point."

I had to reluctantly agree that it made sense, in a sort of twisted way. Orochimaru fucking shit up would help prove the case that they deserved to be funded, and probably not just for Konoha. They were gambling on the ability to protect squishy civilians in the event it was going to be needed.

Sakura looked unenthused, even as she was putting all of this together. "Is it always going to be like this?"

"The further up the ranks you get, the more you're going to be impacted by and have to deal with this sort of thing in your time as an active shinobi," Shikaku said. "You're all already experiencing it to a much more personal degree than is usual for genin, but by the time any of you become tokujō or jōnin, you'll have seen more of it than just once. Unfortunately, you'll have to get used to it, especially as a jōnin. It's why leadership skills and showing that you can think your way out of situations that can't just be solved with jutsu is important, and why those things are required for becoming a chūnin."

The quiet that took over the whole space was one I was familiar with; it was that of a whole group of teenagers suddenly contemplating whether they really wanted to go on the career path they were seeking after all. Usually, it was a bit older, though, since the first time I had seen it was senior year of high school, with the SATs, ACTs, trying to cram in those final AP exams, and all the scholarship and school applications. And then of course the regular internal death of college finals.

Kiba spoke up first. "Do we have to?"

"It's statistically unlikely that you'll stay a genin, and even if you quit you'll still have to deal with this sort of thing anyway. It's a part of growing up."

"Oh," Kiba went. "Gross."

Suigetsu made a disgusted noise in the back of his throat, which I could only guess had to do with Kiba's choice of words.

Most of the kids didn't look all that thrilled anymore at the idea of being promoted at the discovery that it would only make their lives more complicated.

"You all did ask," Shikaku said, sounding amused.

"I think I was fine not knowing," Sakura muttered. "Every time money comes up, I regret it."

Hinata made a small noise in agreement with that.

"It's been a few years since we've had so many rookies make it this far," Shikaku said with a shrug. "Most of the genin who get to this point usually have the chance to learn these things from experience."

"It's interesting to hear all of this outright from a jōnin," the shortest of the Ame-nin said.

"We normally don't have to explain it." Shikaku shrugged. "Under the circumstances…"

"It's still horseshit," Suigetsu grumbled.

Shikaku laughed, and for a moment, the tension I hadn't realized he was carrying disappeared before it piled right back on. Despite the casual affect he was putting on, the man was stressed. That was distressingly realistic. "I still have other things to take care of while the tournament is happening, and those of you with matches probably don't want to spend this time talking with me after hearing all of that," he said. "Good luck, and try to not get too carried away with thinking about anything I said too hard. Even if any of you do make chūnin, you won't get thrown into the deep end of things immediately."

There was enough obvious skepticism at that last bit for him to wave it off, and he left.

"Why does it seem like every time we learn something new, it sucks?" Naruto asked.

"Adulthood sucks," I summarized.

"Ugh," was all Sakura had.

There was a brief moment of contemplative silence before the idle chatter began to pick up again from trying to push the thoughts of all of that away.

Naruto couldn't keep still and kept flitting around, going between us and Haku's team, occasionally stopping to bug Shikamaru. Mostly, he kept commenting out loud on his hopes and expectations on dinner, which for Naruto just meant ramen.

Sakura drifted off to talk to Lee, who had gone out of his way to engage the Kiri-nin in conversation while he wrapped his arms in fresh bandages. Suigetsu seemed to have no idea what to make of him, and Chōjūrō only a bit more. Haku just looked extremely awkward, which wasn't that surprising. This was probably nearing the limits of socialization for him; I doubted he would have had many chances to interact with other people while traveling with Zabuza.

Tenten was trying to talk weapons with the Ame-nin, with mixed success.

Below, people had entered the arena grounds and were gathering the remaining scattered weapons left behind.

On the plus side, none of Team Eight was trying to engage me in conversation after Shikaku's questionable attempt at a career pep talk.

Eventually, Naruto's flitting around stopped, and he went to gawk through the archway that led to the stadium interior. "Hey! Hey! Shikamaru! Your mom's here! I think it's gotta be your mom; she makes the same grumpy face you do!"

It wasn't even the least tactful thing Naruto had said in any of these dreams, but the expression on her face when she entered was definitely Shikamaru-like.

I didn't remember her ever being in a chūnin uniform in the series, though. That was new, though I supposed it made sense that she could have been a ninja. She stared back at me, giving me a look in return, before walking over to where Shikamaru was sitting. Despite Naruto's words, he hadn't bothered to look over.

Naruto was trailing behind her, looking between both her and Shikamaru.

"Shikamaru," she started. "Look at me."

Eventually, Shikamaru looked up, sullen.

His mother put her hands on her hips, with an unamused expression on her face. "Let's go and talk." She turned to look at Naruto. "I can talk to my son alone, right?"

Naruto turned a bright red that clashed against his outfit. "Hahahaha, yeah, sure!" With that, he fled, going and sitting next to Haku, on the other side of him, using the teen as cover, to Haku's clear confusion.

Shikamaru's mother held a hand down to him, which Shikamaru eventually took to be pulled up into a standing position. He immediately shoved his hands into his pockets to look down at the concrete floor, but let himself get guided out of the stands by his mother.

The moment they were out of sight, Kiba sat up, letting Akamaru slide into his lap. He looked over at Hinata and Shino expectantly.

Shino shrugged.

"We shouldn't try to spy on them…" she said.

"C'moooon," Kiba started. "You know he's been all… like that since the second exam. Besides, he was an asshole to you enough for you to kick his ass."

Hinata resisted, but soon enough gave in.

The veins on Hinata's temples bulged as she activated the Byakugan. She frowned in consternation for a while and half-mouthed words to herself, before suddenly stopping. "Oh—" she cut herself off and deactivated them.

"What's wrong?" Kiba questioned.

"We shouldn't spy on them," she said, decisively.

"He was still an asshole," he responded.

Akamaru barked, and Kiba made a face at the dog, who yawned at him in return.

"Fine," Kiba said, with a whine to his voice. "It's not like it's probably anything interesting anyway."

Hinata glanced down to her lap instead of responding.

I rolled my eyes. "She's allowed to not want to be a jerk to people in return."

Kiba rolled his eyes back at me.

Shino made a noise that I couldn't tell whether it was supposed to be in agreement or disagreement.

Hinata gave me a smile. It wasn't even one of the meek ones. Cute.

Eventually, Shikamaru wandered back in, and came and sat down near us.

"Um. Hey," he started, self-consciously.

"Hi," Hinata went softly.

Kiba made a scoffing noise but otherwise didn't say anything.

The idle chatter slowly started up, carefully touching on everything except for the tournament. It paused when suddenly Naruto abruptly stood up from where he was still sitting with the Kiri-nin, and started to pace around near the archway. To my surprise, Shikamaru's mother showed up again, just barely visible from where I was sitting.

Naruto stepped out towards her.

"Try to not lose your wallet, Naruto-kun," she said, audible from even here.

"Uh yeah sure thank you for bringing Gama-chan back!" he babbled, and then he sped off, heading towards us, throwing himself to sit down next to me, toad wallet clutched in his hands. Hinata's eyes widened, since this meant that he was sitting directly behind her.

I could only give him a look.

"I promised to get Chōji stuff from the food stalls, remember," he said, in what was a surprisingly passable whisper from him. "I sent a clone off with my wallet, but uh…"

"You forgot how you'd get your wallet back," Shikamaru surmised.

"Yeah," Naruto admitted. "At least your mom's a real nice lady."

Shikamaru looked at him for a moment. "Yeah, I guess," he finally said. He stared at his feet. "Thanks. For getting Chōji food."

Naruto beamed. "Yeah! It's no problem! It sucks that he's not allowed to leave the hospital even though he was looking forward to the food stalls and stuff."

"That was very nice of you, Naruto-kun," Hinata spoke up.

"You're still stupid since you didn't drop your wallet off at your apartment," Kiba added.

Naruto stared at Kiba for a moment in shock and then laughed.

Soon enough, the stands I could see from where we were sitting began to fill up again, and it was time for the next match.

Wonderful.

Neji and the oversized Ame-nin left, apparently the first match for this round.

I had no interest in watching this if I was being honest with myself. Neji was obnoxious and smug, and so was whatever his name was.

Even despite that lack of interest, I still found myself heading to the railing this time, partially because Naruto and Sakura had gone over to it. We were joined soon enough by Team Eight, and I tried to not look too amused at the fact that Kiba and Shino had not-so-subtly shuffled around so that Hinata had ended up standing next to a still-obvious Naruto. Sakura gave me what was supposed to be a significant look, and I shrugged.

Naruto didn't notice.

Below, Neji almost immediately went for it, but his opponent was already wise to him, pulling out one of his umbrellas to use that to stave Neji off and attack. He wasn't bothering to try actual hand-to-hand combat against him. Probably just as well, given what Neji was supposed to be capable of.

This was worse than watching boxing matches at my tío's for family gatherings. At least those had time limits, breaks between rounds, and it was possible to sneak off to the yard or kitchen.

Neither showed much sign of giving an opening or creating one by force.

The Ame-nin created a surge of water that sent Neji jumping backwards in an attempt to keep his balance, following it up by throwing senbon at him. There were enough that even from up here it was visible.

"A lucky strike," Shino commented. "It looks like he hit a nerve; he's stopped using one of his arms." We didn't even have a good view of Neji, and Shino had pointed it out before the two fighters below had rotated slightly, showing that he was right. Neji's unbandaged arm was hanging loosely, instead of up and ready to use for striking and blocking.

Kiba snorted. "Looks like Hinata's cousin got a taste of his own medicine." He glanced at Sakura. "He got an unfair hit in on you when your teams were training a while back, didn't he?"

"Yeah," Sakura said with a slight frown, visibly remembering it. "We weren't supposed to be going for any kind of attacks like that."

"Sasuke nearly fried him for that," Naruto added.

"When his sensei dropped Neji-nii-san off at the compound, his hair was cut," Hinata said, voice soft. "Some of our clan members have mistaken him for me from behind a few times."

Oh, I doubt he would have liked that.

I was unsurprised that Neji was pressing harder after that, and even from up this far, I was able to watch with some disgust as the bandages on his good arm turned red with an edging of pink as he bled into it.

"Neji won't be able to keep it up much longer if the match doesn't end soon," Tenten spoke up. Looking over, she was clenching the railing hard enough that her knuckles had gone white. Lee was next to her, his attention rapt.

Another wave of water appeared, matched with senbon, but Neji whirled in place, spinning so quickly that it was hard to make him out. Both the water and senbon got blown away.

On the other side of Naruto, I was just vaguely aware of Hinata looking away.

Neji stopped, but not enough to not take the force of momentum with him as he ran towards the Ame-nin, skidding hard enough his feet were digging into the ground. He struck at the older teen's legs with a sharp snap of his good arm, and the Ame-nin went down.

"Winner, Hyūga Neji of Konohagakure!"

"Damn," Kiba went.

"It's for the best that he won," Hinata said. She didn't look all that happy, though.

"Because of the technique he used, right?" Sakura asked.

Hinata nodded.

Wonderful. It was time to get my ass kicked by Lee. I glanced towards him.

Lee threw a thumbs up at me and a wide grin.

I didn't appreciate it.

Naruto gave me a tooth-clenched smile and leaned towards me. "Please don't end up in the hospital; it'll probably make Kakashi-sensei mad." I wondered how I should feel about the fact that Naruto was getting better at whispering.

Sakura choked back a laugh. "I think that's on Lee," she managed to say.

I trailed behind Lee to head to the arena grounds.

The fact that I felt pain in these dreams was the worst part of all of them. And so was being Sasuke. And the fact that Kakashi was concerned about 'me' like he had a leg to stand on when it came to mental health. And the cursed—

I exhaled and did my best to shut off that line of thought.

I had enough self-discipline to be able to focus on the current immediate important but not serious problem. It was just a dream. If nothing else, I needed to at least make it through to spring break before I allowed myself to have a complete mental breakdown.

I just needed to keep myself together for three more days.

The problem was that I wasn't sure I was going to be able to keep myself together for three more days. Not without another trip to the liquor store, at least.

Lee was at least quiet on the way down, focused on the match ahead. I just wished he wasn't in such an obviously good mood about it.

I'm not going to forfeit. I refuse.

I was absolutely going to lose and had no interest in trying to stretch out the suffering, but it didn't mean I was going to just give in before that. I still had my pride. It was under several layers of embarrassment and suffering right now, but I hadn't let go of it yet.

The proctor— Raidō, I wasn't going to forget his name this time— raised an eyebrow at me with an expression I could easily interpret. One that was 'Don't make his job harder than it has to be with already having to deal with a bunch of teenagers.'

I let the rest just fall into place:

Stand several feet away from Lee.

Ignore the overeager expression on Lee's face.

It was time to suffer.

Raidō called the match.

I found out almost immediately that while it hadn't been seriously hurting anymore, my side where Chōjūrō had hit me with his dumb sword was still sensitive and did not like the amount of physical movement needed to not get further pummeled.

I internally cringed when one of the jabs I threw out at Lee was blocked, and after we had pulled apart, there was a fist-sized imprint of blood seeping around the area I had just hit.

Disgusting.

I was reluctant to hit him far more after that, if he was just going to continue oozing blood like that.

I only had enough time to have half of a second thought of regretting all of this when Lee sped towards me, fist aimed for my head.

I chucked my phone at my closet when it woke me up, alarm blaring. It neatly spun and landed in the middle shelf of the closet organizer I kept my sweaters in. At least I had woken up in bed.

I had just enough time to groan in realization at the fact I hadn't swiped the alarm off before it aggressively beeped at me again. Against my will, I rolled out of bed. My head hurt. My neck was still sore. At least my shoulder and knee were mostly behaving, but I wasn't convinced this was a fair trade.

I started the coffee maker with only my usual obscene amount of grounds put in before I lumbered into the bathroom. While I had gotten sleep, I still looked like shit, between the circles under my eyes and the general exhaustion that I hadn't fully dislodged itself yet. Horribly, I was pretty sure that was a stress pimple forming just above my left eyebrow. It was almost more insulting than the impossible mark that was still at the base of my neck, hard to see without manhandling myself or using a second mirror.

I turned on my straightener and unbraided my hair with one hand while I checked my phone.

My best friend had, in true obnoxious form, managed to spam my phone with over fifty messages from about five AM my time on. Scrolling through it, most of it was just GIFs and emoji spam. Even with being two hours ahead that was still fucking awful of Xoichitl, but it wasn't like she had ever respected my need for sleep before. The vast majority of it was Disney spam, followed by a final message of 'in town Friday for weekend. Drinks?'

I smashed an angry face followed by the heart emote back at her, followed by a 'yes'. The last time I had seen her was over Christmas; normally she was out in Boston. I probably didn't need more alcohol in my system than I was already planning, but I could at least have a bitch fest with her. Cling to normality.

I washed my face, brushed out my hair, straightened it, and put on makeup before I left the bathroom to change, looking slightly more alive, even though I wasn't sure I wanted to face reality. Even though the weather was already supposed to be in the low seventies this week, I pulled out a turtleneck. I was going to have to go get tattoo concealer or something. I couldn't have my mother's side of the family going into hysterics over me somehow having a neck tattoo. I would never escape the gossip.

By the time I had enough caffeine running through me to give the average naive freshman the shakes, I felt secure enough to try and satisfy my curiosity.

Pulling up a private browser tab, I looked up the Ame-nin from the night's dream, the big one.

Shigure. Of course he'd have a name and birthday on the wiki. Why the fuck wouldn't he?

I closed the screen.

I hope everyone's been doing well and having a decent spring so far! Mine's involved going to the dentist, pondering cookie recipes, and looking into the next step of education for my career plans. It's also unfortunately getting hot in my corner of the world; just early April and it's already hit the 90s! (32C and up for everyone else.)

For the overall matches, by the metrics I went with, a few of you got pretty close on your guesses. :)

Firlz, Soapie Whiskey, and SmilingTotheAbyss, please let me know what you'd like to see as PiaG pieces.

Next up: Invasion?

And for anyone doing Camp NaNo this month, come write me me on discord! The invite code is: xZrqJC6