chapter 8: the worth of being seen

in which yuna confronts her truths

cw: unhealthy/toxic relationships, gaslighting by information omission, unreliable narrator, disregard for autonomy/agency, god complex, and as always, no relationships or characters should be idolized or emulated

A late summer night in a shitty apartment in Edogawa, a long time ago.

The night before Fushiguro Toji kills Amanai Riko, thereby changing the course of jujutsu history forever, his air conditioning unit breaks. It is the most unbearable kind of summer night, so humid it feels like wading through the water, even when the windows are propped open. The electric fan circulates tepid air with the utility of draining the ocean teacup by teacup. Perhaps it's more accurate to say that the air conditioning has been broken for a long time, but Toji is too cheap to turn it on and therefore would have never known it was broken at all if it weren't for Yuna, miserably hot after a training session and nerves blistering from allowing all her students to guard the Plasma Vessel in Okinawa, convincing him to try.

It takes barely even a minute for the unit to sputter and spark dangerously before Toji yanks the plug.

"Toji-san," Yuna's voice borders a whine. "Please tell me you can fix it."

Toji shrugs and dislodges the smoking unit out of the window. He's gone shirtless for the evening, but even then, sweat beads over his bare skin. "Nah. Won't be able to do anything about it until tomorrow." He raises his eyes at her. "You don't have to stay, y'know. Your fancy School has functioning air conditioning, I'm sure."

She shakes her head unhappily. "No, I'll stay."

He grins, baring teeth. "My company that good?"

"I worry you're lonely, that's all."

His grin evaporates—being pitied, even sarcastically, annoys him. "I'd flick you off if my hands weren't full." He hauls the entire unit under one giant arm just so he can attempt the gesture. "Oh, look at that, I can do anything I put my mind to."

"Just get rid of it, Toji-san, and come back to help me cook."

Yuna stirs the miso glumly while Toji disappears to dump the unit in the alleyway. It takes him longer than it should, and when he returns nearly fifteen minutes later, Yuna is finished preparing the meal and the coffee table is set. She idles on the couch, annoyed and ready to chide him.

"Here." Before she can say anything, he shoves a plastic bag in her face.

She takes it from him and eyes his bare chest, littered with scars, the one she'd left over his heart glistening with a bright sheen. "Did they let you in the konbini without a shirt?"

He rolls his eyes. "You think anyone had the balls to tell me no?"

She hums in agreement and opens the bag while Toji settles next to her and digs into the dishes: pork-belly, cold soba noodles, pickled daikon, seaweed salad, and steaming miso soup, misplaced. He's sweating like a horse; even though he's not out of breath, the closest konbini that is still open is a twenty-minute walk away, which means he must've at least jogged there in this heat.

Out of the plastic bag, Yuna pulls out a six-pack of ice-cold beers in her favorite brand.

She gives a small smile. "Thank you, Toji-san."

He grunts and downs his soup. Yuna cracks open a beer and drinks deeply, hopeful that the alcohol will soothe her searing nerves. The heat has only fortified her anxiety surrounding Satoru and Suguru's mission, never mind that they'd texted her pictures from what appears to be an exciting day on the beach and in the Okinawa aquarium.

As Yuna ruminates about things she has no control over, Toji picks a cube of daikon between his chopsticks and studies it. Then, casually, he asks,

"When was the first time you used your Domain?"

(Ten years from now, Yuna, green-haired, hummingbird inked on her neck, will look back on this inquiry with clearer eyes, will recognize it as Toji preparing for a battle with Satoru he knows will come to fruition with the surety of the moon following the sun. But to Yuna, ten years younger, this moment convinces her more than anything that some part of Fushiguro Toji wants to truly know her, and in spite of it all, truly loves her. (And even then, to the Yuna ten years from now, two opposing truths may still co-exist)).

Yuna swallows the beer hastily, erupting in a fit of coughs. Toji peers at her, amused, and reaches for a beer of his own while he waits for her to finish.

"Why?" she wheezes.

He shrugs. "Just saw a daikon crate in the alley when I threw out the air conditioning. Got me thinkin'. Made me remember the time you nearly killed me. Thought Domains were reserved for master class sorcerers." He shoots her a toothy smirk. "How do the Jujutsu Higher-Ups feel about a monkey like me fucking a master class sorcerer?"

"They don't know about it."

He laughs. "Of course not, hummingbird, that'd be on another level of stupid if you told the Higher-Ups about who you're fucking—"

"No," she interrupts. "They don't know about the Domain. No one does. Except for you."

Toji arches an eyebrow. "Why? Is that why you're still a Grade Two scrub? Anyone who can do a Domain should be Grade One, easy."

Yuna chews the inside of her cheek. She isn't hungry, all of a sudden. She fans herself, drinks more beer, hopes that Toji will lose interest, but her adamance only makes him more curious.

"It's not that special," she says, settling with a half-truth. "It is a weak Domain, all things considered. In a real fight, a strong enough sorcerer would be able to beat me, even within my own Domain. Catching people by surprise is usually my only chance—it's easy enough to counter if you know what to expect."

"You've used it on the same person twice?"

"No," she admits.

Silence follows, and again, Toji displays an odd sort of patience that bullies her into finally yielding.

"Just you." She chews her radish, relishing the cold crunch. "The first and only time I've used my Domain was on you."

"Huh." Toji scratches his chin. He didn't shave today, so there is slightly more stubble than his normal five-o'clock-shadow. "Wouldn't have guessed that."

"I'm sorry."

"The fuck for?"

"For using it." She clears her throat. "On you."

Toji stares at her. "Hummingbird, I blinded you and was about to sell you. You were stupid not to finish me off."

"I thought about it," she says, "but I'm glad I didn't."

(Because if I had, how would I have been able to fall in love with you?)

Toji could laugh it off. Could call her stupid. Could say a myriad of truths and never admit a goddamn thing.

Instead, he says, rarely pensive, "Yeah, me too."

They drink. Beer tastes good with pork belly. Next to her on the sofa, Toji's free hand wanders onto her thigh, sticky but comforting.

"Hummingbird." She looks up at him, and he knocks her forehead gently with the edge of his beer, eyes gleaming, scar twisting with his conviction. "Never fucking apologize for surviving."

(It's the closest thing to him saying it back.)

Tokyo, Japan. November 13th, 2017.

There is bad timing, and then there is timing that so barely fails being good, it is worse than bad.

When Satoru's Cursed Energy appears just as Yuna's Cursed Energy abruptly evaporates from the alleyway below, Megumi lets out a noise suspiciously close to the word Fuck and jumps off the side of the building, Cursed Energy bracing his fall. He sprints toward Satoru, where the three Curse Users remain with only the faint ringing of Yuna's Residuals.

Megumi has grown up with Satoru as such a persistently irritating presence in his life that sometimes, just sometimes, he forgets who Satoru really is. He forgets that Satoru has the power to rip a mountain in two with just a flick of his fingers, can warp time and space with a blink of his eyes, can defy all laws of gravity and physics because he exists on a plane of his own. Usually, Satoru is more big-brother-father-teacher-pest than he is a god, who trolls Nanami with dick pics and sets Yaga's office on fire in a prank-gone-wrong. When Megumi thinks of Satoru, he thinks annoying and reliable and safety.

He forgets to think of fear.

"You just missed her," says one of Getou's twins, the mouthier one with brunette hair. Megumi remembers her Cursed Energy vividly, even though it has been years since she'd paralyzed Megumi and then murdered Shimida-sensei. He knows the thought of Shimida-sensei barely crosses this girl's mind, not when she has probably killed so many others.

Satoru is not wearing his blindfold or even his sunglasses, and his Six Eyes seem to pulse like stars in the galaxy. "Is that so."

The words are uttered with such threat that Megumi fights the urge to take a step back, even though Satoru is not even addressing him. The three Curse Users actively wince, and color drains from the brunette's face. Admirably, she stares evenly at Satoru's naked eyes and stammers,

"Getou-sama won't hurt her!"

"Yeah," says Satoru, tone as detached as a disembodied mannequin. Every hair on Megumi's body screams for him, the Curse Users, and every living person in a ten-kilometer radius to run. "Too bad I didn't make the same promise."

The adult Curse User, a man nearly as tall as Satoru, steps forward. "Getou-sama said you won't hurt kids."

Satoru scoffs and looks the man up and down. "You're one overgrown child."

"Let the twins go," says the man, arms braced in fighting stance, a black rope looped around his palms. "I, Miguel, will be your opponent."

Satoru eyes the rope. "Hm. Related to that Samuel guy, huh. No wonder you found the hideout. I told Yuna that dude was a motherfucker."

"He thinks highly of Yuna-san. He merely shared her Barrier work, unknowing of what we were planning."

"Sure," says Satoru. "Just know that after I'm done here, I'm gonna track him down on whatever continent he's on and kill him and your whole fucking family."

Megumi blinks, and Satoru grabs the brunette twin and slams her into the wall behind.

"Nanako!"

Incredibly, Nanako has sharp enough reflexes to reinforce her body with Cursed Energy just in time to blunt the blow, not that her pittance would have mattered if Satoru had really been trying.

"You're the one that disappeared her, right?" says Satoru, fingers tightening around Nanako's throat. "Either you tell me where you sent her and I spare you and your twin, or you make me waste the minutes it'll take for me to find Yuna's Cursed Energy in this godforsaken city and I'll kill you on the spot. I'll find her either way. You choose if you wanna live."

"Getou-sama won't hurt her!" repeats Nanako, her voice shrill and wobbly. Blood trickles down her forehead.

"That wasn't my fucking question."

"Getou-sama said…" Nanako glances frantically at Miguel, "you wouldn't hurt us either."

"He's the one that swears the binding vows. I haven't promised him shit. Where's Yuna?"

"I…" Nanako swallows. "I won't say. Go ahead. Do it."

Satoru arches an eyebrow. "Fine."

His finger twitches, his Cursed Energy swells, the twin screams, Miguel rushes forward but it's pointless, and Megumi will simply let it happen because why should he give a fuck about Getou Suguru's family when they've terrorized so many others—they're not kids, really, not when they're Megumi's age, and Megumi is always ready to die, so they should be, too—

But then Tsumiki's voice appears right in his ear, chiding.

Don't let him do it.

"Satoru!" says Megumi sharply, hating himself, hating Tsumiki for being right.

Satoru freezes, as if he is only now remembering that Megumi is there.

"Leave them," he says, thankful that his voice comes out steady. "We're wasting time."

He summons Nue, the owl shikigami enveloping most of the alleyway with a brush of its wings as it grabs Megumi under both arms and heaves up into the air. They land on the tallest building close by, which in Edogawa is the roof of a new luxury high-rise. Megumi only waits for half a second before Satoru joins him in the air, much to his relief.

"Any idea of where Getou's hideout could be?" Megumi asks, choosing not to comment about the murder that had barely not occurred.

Satoru looks north and doesn't answer for several seconds. When he does, he says,

"You should go back to the School, Megumi."

He bristles. "What? Don't send me away, Satoru, I can fight—"

"It's not that," he interrupts, eyes fixated ahead. "You know I'm always happy to let you fight. I found her, but there's something going on and I have a feeling Yuna won't want you to see her like this."

Megumi wants to press, but Satoru flicks Megumi's forehead.

"Stop wasting time. Go back to School. Tell Yaga I'll handle it."

Megumi scowls, but Nue grabs him by a shoulder. "Fine. But if you're longer than half an hour, I'm coming back."

Satoru gives a wry smile. "Sure. Thanks for earlier, by the way. Yuna's right. Can't go cutting kids' lives short."

Before Megumi can express just how little he cared for those two girls, and that his intervention had been more for Tsumiki and whatever they can assume of Satoru's humanity, Satoru disappears into the night.

On that same summer night, a long time ago.

"Why is it all dark?"

It's a routine, he washes, she dries, in between, she drinks. Toji, who finds beer a poor substitute to soda, only drank one; Yuna is on her fourth.

"What is?"

"Your Domain."

They'd finished dinner talking mostly about mundane things, like how to find an electrician they can trust in the morning, or if they can go into any run-of-the-mill electric shop to purchase a new air conditioning unit, but it's clear the topic of Domains never really left Toji's train of thought.

"I wouldn't know," he continues, "but they say Domains manifest as the perfect embodiment of a shaman's soul. Straight-up darkness isn't what I'd guess for you. Your Cursed Energy tastes…" he grimaces, "yellow-orange. A peach. The sun."

She'd laugh at his attempt to be poetic, if it weren't a topic that Yuna desperately does not want to delve into. Toji can sense it, but something (the impending threat of Gojou Satoru) pushes him forward. The way he looks at her is different from normal: careful but curious. He is never one to be circumspect with his words, preferring to bludgeon with disregard. Now, though, he senses that he is treading in dangerous territory, similar to that one night on the roof when his conviction of her goodness had been so unbearable, it had triggered a panic attack.

Yuna finishes her fourth beer and reaches for the last one. Her cheeks are burning and her voice comes out thick. "Why are you asking about this, Toji-san?"

"Just wanna understand what makes a master sorcerer like you tick—"

"I am not a master sorcerer." She flicks the tab of the beer can so hard, it ricochets off the wall and clatters onto the ground with a sharp clink. "I am a sorcerer who happens to understand the fundamentals of Barrier Techniques well, and a Domain Expansion is simply the pinnacle of Barrier Techniques. The concept is not hard, but its execution requires the full recognition of one's entire being, not just the self at present, but the self in all future potential. Once that is recognized, the Domain is like any Barrier."

"Sounds like a bunch of textbook bullshit," says Toji, voice edgy. "Dumb it down for a monkey like me."

"Don't call yourself a fucking monkey, Toji-san. I don't even want to talk about this," she snaps.

The last dish clatters to the side as he shuts off the faucet. Hands dripping, he rips the can of beer out of her hands and dumps its contents down the drain. Yuna lets out a strangled noise and instinctively lunges for it, but Toji grabs her by the chin and forces her to look at him.

"What are you so scared of?" he sneers. "What the fuck do you think I could possibly do to you if I just understood you?" He leans close, and the sneer is just a sheer gloss of bravado. "I can never hurt you, hummingbird. You made sure of that. So what the fuck do you have to lose?"

He waits, that strange patience lingering, but Yuna doesn't have an answer for him. Everything. You. She wants him to kiss her.

Instead, after several breaths, his eyes dull. He lets go and makes his way to the bedroom, cursing all the while.

Yuna stares at the sink, where the carbonation from the beer wilts into the soap suds as they slide, one collective effervescent body, down the drain.

Tokyo, Japan. November 13th, 2017.

Yuna can count the number of people aware of her Domain on one hand: Satoru, Yuki, Kento, and hilariously enough, Zen'in Naoya. She had thought Zen'in Naoya would report it to his clan eventually, given it is dangerous for the Gojou Family to have a Cursed Weapon capable of utilizing a Domain in their possession. She is grateful she is wrong; Suguru must have spies deep in the Three Great Families, and his unmistakable surprise at the sight of Yuna's Domain Expansion means that Naoya's pride runs foolishly deep, even if it is at the cost of his clan.

The Expansion is different this time; all the Cursed Energy she and countless other resentful mothers had poured into her Cursed Child over the last decade and a half brim at her fingertips. Each character inked on her skin lights alive simultaneously, and beside her, the Cursed Child's two mouths widen in glee.

"Use us, Kaa-san! I want to show you!"

"W-What is this?" stammers Youko. "Why is it so dark? Yuna, what is going on?"

Yuna ignores them both. She balances Toji's old staff, now likely a Grade One Weapon on its own given how many years of seals and Cursed Energy Yuna has poured into it, and unwraps the repaired Chain of a Thousand Miles. On one end of the Chain is a special Hidden seal that her Domain activates and swallows, allowing the Chain to extend indefinitely. Along the remainder of the Chain are countless additional ofuda. Yuna briefly thinks that, including herself, the three-Item package is well worth over ten billion yen.

"Impossible," Suguru manages to say as the effects of Freeze begin to wear off.

A Barrier clings close to Yuna's skin, the only bit of light in Oblivion. "Your Cursed Energy resistance is remarkable, Getou-kun. That was barely a minute."

"It just means you're weak," he spits. "This is a sham of a Domain, how a monkey like you can even fathom such a thing is blasphemy."

"All right," she says. She hands the free end of the Chain of a Thousand Miles, where the blade of Nightmare's Whim dangles, to her Cursed Child, who receives it eagerly. "If that is true, Getou-kun, the only thing you need to do is release your own Domain, correct? In a battle of Domains, I will certainly lose."

Suguru's face contorts in loathing. "As if you're worthy of seeing such a thing."

Yuna hums. "You don't have one, do you?"

"How dare—"

"It's nothing to be ashamed of," she says. "So many master-class sorcerers do not have one. It means little on my bearing as a sorcerer. I taught you about Domains, didn't I? Though I think it simply means I was a poor teacher." She twirls her staff. "I hope I may rectify that now."

"You think I need a Domain to beat you?" Suguru says loftily. Freeze has completely worn off now, and he shakes off the effects of the spell like a dusting of snow off his coat. "Perhaps the lesson will be mine to teach this time."

As Yuna had practiced her Domain with Yuki over the years, the gnawing emptiness of her Domain has grown less frightening. Now, she finds the cloak of Oblivion fairly comforting—it is like staring unwavering at the manifestation of that acrid, soul-swallowing desolation in her gut that she'd felt when Fushiguro Toji had sworn her a binding vow. In her palms, Toji's staff is well-worn. In the hands of her child, Nightmare's Whim is manifested.

Yuna will not survive tonight, but neither will the worst parts of Fushiguro Toji. Outside of Oblivion, his blessing is strong, good, and well-protected, and Yuna, who has done so much and yet so little for a child that is not hers, thinks that it is right to bury her own child with her at long last.

That same summer night, a long time ago in that shitty apartment in Edogawa.

They can't sleep. It's too hot, and Toji is angry and annoyed even though he will never admit it, and Yuna feels like she might as well just light herself on fire and burn into ashes if it means at least this can end.

She doesn't know what time it is, just knows that it's late and she's been bathing in her own sweat for far too long for this to be worth it when she finally says, out of nowhere,

"Barrier Techniques are all about intent."

Toji stiffens, clearly already awake, but doesn't turn around to face her. Yuna shifts so she lies on her side, facing Toji's back, broad and toned with muscles she isn't entirely sure have anatomic names.

"I am good at learning rules. Yaga-sensei has always complimented how quickly I adapted to jujutsu sorcery, and he attributed my understanding of Barriers to this. But while Barrier foundations are technical, complex Barriers are less about actual technique and more about manifesting intent."

Her voice is smooth, even, rehearsed. She had said these same words to Suguru not too long ago, when he'd wanted to learn more about customized Curtains.

"It's partially knowing where exactly to place your intent when you cast a spell or Curtain, but more so, it's having clarity about what exactly you want your Curtain to accomplish. And I think I am rather good at this because my Cursed Technique is, to some extent, a variant of a Blood Technique."

Toji finally turns around to face her, aggravation melting into contemplation. "Right. Blood Manipulation can make anything happen in the body, or change the shape or nature of blood itself, as long as the user wills it so."

She nods. "From what I could gather in my readings, yes. The possibilities of Blood Manipulation are endless, can defy anatomy or physics, but users of Blood Manipulation often have the same basic skills to start because the rules of anatomy or physics help structure the intention. I tried to do this since I started learning anatomy with Shouko-san, but I do not think I can make my Cursed Technique manifest in this way. I am not sure why. Maybe because calligraphy is the way I manifested my Technique to begin with, and that's all my mind can conceptualize now."

Toji nods slowly. "Your kanji helps direct intention."

"Yes. It can't be just any character, or any intention without restrictions. All of jujutsu is based on balance, but the kanji helps."

He frowns. "Doesn't explain your Domain."

"What I said earlier is true. Domains are the finest form of Barrier Techniques, brimming with intention about your own existence, and you have to manifest that and all its contingencies into a Barrier. Their first manifestations often happen at life-or-death situations, but only because being confronted with your mortality makes it easier to confront yourself as an entity. You have to accept the circumstances and limitations that forced you into that situation, but also all future potential that you may lose, thereby accepting your full self, past, present, and future. It's easy to theorize, but it's also why so many powerful sorcerers don't have a Domain—it's hard to accept a fixed future, even if it has potential. It's why even someone like Gojou-kun doesn't have one yet; how can he know who he is for sure, when he is just a child?"

Only when Toji slides a hand under her chin and makes her look at him does Yuna realize she has turned away from him. His hold is gentle, but does not allow her to move.

"I ain't askin' for a lecture, hummingbird," he says mildly. "You don't need to go all teacher on me just to dodge a question."

"I answered your question, Toij-san."

"You answered why your Domain is all dark?"

"Can't you conclude the answer from what I told you?"

His grip tightens in warning. "Sass, hummingbird."

"It's because that's all I am," she blurts out, angry and frightened and surrendering. "It's called Oblivion. Nothingness. That's my recognized potential, Toji-san, past, present, future, and I activated it because you were about to sell me and it reminded me of that hellhole with Kamo-san where that was all I was. The fact that I could create a Domain based on that conviction means it's true, and everything I've done for the past year, trying to make something of myself and my students is just playing pretend. You told me yourself when you met me for the first time—you saw it in me, this amount of fucked up inside, that's me in my truth, my soul perfected, absolutely fucking nothing, and when you were about to sell me because that is all I'm worth, I accepted it."

Toji looks at her, gaze unwavering, waiting in that infuriating way he has been all night. All Yuna can hear is her own harsh breaths, can only feel sweat bead and slide down her cheeks, but then she blinks, and her lashes are wet.

"Fuck," she whispers, finally turning away to wipe her tears. She rolls onto her back, forearm pressed against her eyes. "Are you happy now, Toji-san? You understand now, right?"

He pulls her wrist away and shifts his body over hers, trapping her underneath. One hand rests at her neck to make her look at him again, his profile massive and overbearing, blocking out the little moonlight with his shadow, while the other flicks away her tears.

"The fuck are you cryin' for," he says gruffly.

"Well," the word comes out shaky but sarcastic, "the conclusion is depressing."

Toji snorts and pinches her cheek to mask him brushing away another tear. "Sass, hummingbird," he says again, but it is less heated this time. "Hasn't anyone ever told you that jujutsu is a bunch of shit? Not just jujutsu—generally, the entire fucking world is shit."

Yuna blinks rapidly to ensure she has stopped crying. "And?"

"And," he says, voice low, "you're one of the least shitty people I've met in it. No matter what you've done, or what you think you are. And you could say I'm just a fuckin' monkey, what the fuck do I know, but I'm a monkey with sharper eyes than any other man and I can say for sure," his pupils are wide, his face shadowed, he looks nearly feral, "you have more worth in your fucking little finger than the rest of the fuckin' world." He taps on her breastbone. "That little fucked up bit inside of you, that's called surviving. What'd I tell you earlier, hummingbird?"

It takes a moment for her to realize that he is not asking it rhetorically.

"Never apologize for surviving," she whispers.

His lips quirk, but his eyes are grim. "Good girl."

Tokyo, Japan. November 13th, 2017.

Satoru's Six Eyes had told him something was wrong, but he certainly had not expected this. He finds Suguru's hideout only because Yuna's marigold Cursed Energy attracts him like a siren call, even if it is shrouded in indigo. He has known the dual-toned nature of Yuna's Cursed Energy for a long time, even if he has never mentioned it to her, unsure if she herself is even aware. When he teleports to it, he arrives right on the edge of a Curtain that hides everything from his Eyes except for Yuna's Cursed Energy—it is clearly specially tailored to keep certain Cursed Energy Signatures hidden, even from Satoru's Six Eyes, though at the cost of having a discrete pressure point. It takes him a few seconds, but Satoru locates the weak spot at three-o'clock from the dome's center and ejects a single thrum of Cursed Energy to force the Barrier's dissolution.

Suguru's hideout, or the Plasma Vessel Association's headquarters, is massive, in the architecture of traditional Shinto temples, complete with false idols and even a koi pond. There are only two gates, both heavily guarded with Curse Users whose Energies Satoru recognize faintly from chance encounters over the years. Immediately, the Curtain's dissolution triggers multiple Cursed Items and seals to fire at him. Satoru dismisses them with a casual wave of his hand; some he lets ricochet off Infinity, too busy to be bothered otherwise. It is all within his expectations.

What he does not expect, however, is a Domain Expansion smack in the middle of the grounds.

It takes only a second for Satoru to conclude that the Domain is not Suguru's. The Signature is wrong, the area fairly small, and Satoru does not think that Suguru, for all his supposed convictions, has been able to master a Domain Expansion.

It does not take away from Satoru's surprise of seeing Yuna's Domain Expansion for the first time. He teleports to its base and paces outside of it for a moment, debating if there's a polite way to ask Yuna for admission into her Domain.

"This is ridiculous," he mutters, before he simply forces his Cursed Energy to make an entrance for himself.

Or, he tries, only to find that it rejects him.

"The fuck," Satoru shakes out his hand. It doesn't hurt, but Infinity feels off, as if punctured by millions of microneedles. It shouldn't be difficult for anyone, much less him, to penetrate a Domain from the outside—it doesn't make sense.

"He's here!" shouts someone to Satoru's right. "I-It's him, Gojou Satoru! Bring reinforcements right away, I-I'll h-hold him o-o-off—"

Satoru teleports right to the guard: dark hair, sharp features except for slightly wide, navy crossed-eyes.

"A Zen'in defector, huh," comments Satoru. "Great. Won't feel too bad about this."

He grabs the guard by the collar and hurls him into the Domain, which swallows him into its depth as easily as quicksand.

"The fuck, Yuna!" he groans. "I even sent Megumi away because I knew you'd be like this, but this is me! What are you doing keeping me out?!"

The Domain doesn't answer.

"Fine," Satoru snips to no one as he brings up his fingers in a seal. "We'll do it my way then. Domain Expansion: Infinite Void."

As Satoru's Domain takes over Yuna's, he glimpses hers in time as catatonia descends like rainfall.

Her Domain is dark. At first, Satoru thinks his Six Eyes are malfunctioning—is this what blindness is like? It's weirdly peaceful—before he realizes that that is the Domain's terrain: absolutely nothing.

Well, not absolutely nothing. There is an astonishingly not-one-sided battle occurring, or, that was occurring until Satoru had intervened. Yuna, incredibly, seems to be holding her own. Every kanji character on her skin is lit, most brightly Freeze and Blast; on her ankles, Fly glows in sky blue. Yuna's Barrier clings to her skin like plastic wrap. Behind her are two non-sorcerers that Satoru barely registers, their Cursed Energies are so feeble, and Satoru's empathy so lackluster.

Suguru's right arm is bleeding from a dagger buried in his forearm, anchoring a silver chain that wraps tightly around him. Half of the ofuda on the chain glow in synchrony, all spelling the same character: Seal. It looks like Yuna, knowing she could not overpower Suguru, had attempted to seal him instead, but Suguru's curse repertoire is too vast. He is surrounded by an array of Curses: a bulbous, wart-covered ogre, a grapefruit jellyfish, a screeching ghost with enucleated eyes. There is another one with two heads, four-arms, and a massive amount of undefined Cursed Energy: a Cursed Womb on the brink of transformation into a full Special Grade. Satoru frowns at it. Something is off with the Cursed Womb. Its Cursed Energy is linked to Yuna, its Energy the same indigo-black as hers, like a leash to a dog, or an umbilical cord to a newborn—

Oh.

Satoru approaches them as his Domain crescents to completion, replacing the dark nothingness of Yuna's Domain with an infinite nothingness of his own. He goes to Yuna first and touches her shoulder, shocking her out of the catatonia.

She gasps sharply, as if resurfacing from a deep dive, even though it has only been seconds.

"Hi," he waves. "Found you."

A veil descends from her eyes, but as reality registers, her expression morphs to horror when she realizes he is in front of her. He tries not to be offended.

"Gojou-kun."

Yuna is pale as the moon, but she doesn't have a scratch on her. Her Curse Womb hovers over her shoulder, frozen in place, but Satoru can tell from its vibrating energy that it is trying desperately to look at him.

"It looks like you're doin' just fine on your own. Nice Domain."

"Megumi-kun—"

"He's fine," he cuts in. "I sent him back to School. Figured you wouldn't want him to see you like this, though your Domain tried real hard to keep me out too. I tossed some scrub in here just to check. It's specific to me, isn't it?"

"I can explain, Gojou-kun," she says carefully.

"Yeah, you better. Later, when we're back to the School. For now," he wags his finger at the Cursed Womb, "I'm gonna get rid of the riffraff."

Yuna realizes what he's pointing at. "Satoru, wait—"

Satoru snaps his fingers and all the Curses in his Domain implode. Suguru's curses dissolve without fanfare, but the Cursed Womb reaches for Yuna in its last moments of existence.

"Kaa-san!"

Yuna visibly flinches, but something like despair crosses her face. Satoru pretends not to notice. He tucks her under his arm, ignoring how the dark Cursed Energy rebounds to Yuna like a rubber band snapping back in place.

Instead, he looks at Suguru, who is frozen in place, processing a billion particles of information and unable to act on a single one. Satoru has never met someone who could match his Domain, but he imagines that Infinite Void doesn't give people the chance to activate their own in contention. He is unable to experience his own Domain—why subject himself to that kind of vulnerability, after all—but he wonders, and briefly hopes, that in the flood, Suguru may find the missing piece that may change his mind.

"Yuna," he says, "I came here just for you. I got you now. I'm gonna leave Suguru alone."

It's treason. It's fucking batshit. Satoru knows. Suguru has declared war that is coming in weeks to their doorsteps. Thousands of non-sorcerers may die. Satoru is asking sorcerers to lay their lives on the line, when he could kill Suguru now with a single Technique.

Yuna knows, too. But she just looks at Suguru, then at Satoru, and then off in the distance, "All right."

"You won't say anything?"

"No."

"All right. Who are the non-sorcerers?"

Yuna doesn't answer immediately. "My parents."

"For real?"

"Yes."

Satoru glances at them, but he still barely sees them, and barely cares. "You want me to kill 'em or take 'em with us?"

She looks at him incredulously. "Why ask me what I want at all, Gojou-kun?"

A younger, brasher Satoru would have lashed out, and the Honored One would have howled to kill her, too. But it has been a long time since Satoru faced the Honored One and became one and the same, realized and embraced his potential and his possibility.

"Because," he says honestly, "I think I've killed enough of your blood without asking tonight. And we'll talk about it. But right now, Megumi's waiting back home and I just want to get you to safety. So just tell me what you want, Yuna, and I'll do it."

Yuna begins to answer, her mouth twisted and wry, but she stops herself and just looks at Suguru, static in time and space. Her eyes soften, then her expression grows bland.

"Take them with us," she buries her face in his chest, and Satoru can feel her full weight against him. "Let's go home, Gojou-kun."

Satoru wraps his arm fully around her, takes another look at Suguru, wishing, and obeys.

The next morning, Yuna scrambles for her shoes. She is going to miss the early train, which means she will be late getting back to Jujutsu High campus to meet the students and the Star Plasma Vessel. Toji watches her from the bedroom door, arms crossed over his bare chest, blinking the night away.

"You'll call the electrician today, right?" says Yuna as she tucks both feet in her old black flats. The heels are nearly chafed through. "For the air conditioning?"

Toji nods.

"You're sure?" she presses. "I'm only going to come back here if it's working, Toji-san, the heat was intolerable last night."

(Though that had not stopped them from fucking after Toji had stopped her crying, and maybe it was the first time that Yuna had stupidly thought that it wasn't as much fucking as it was making love but who was she to be so stupid?)

"I got it."

Yuna feels as if their conversation is unfinished, a meal prepped halfway then abandoned, food left to rot. She wants to conclude it, but doesn't know how and doesn't have the time.

"All right then," she says, turning, heart hammering, uneasy. "Let me know when you get it fixed. And later—"

"Yuna."

Toji's voice is right behind her. She turns, wide-eyed, and finds him horribly close. It makes her pulse skyrocket even more.

"What did you just call me," she manages, before Toji leans down and kisses her.

It's a scene out of an old romance film. Slow, gentle, hand curled behind her ear, tilting her face up, holding her like she's something precious. She can taste his morning breath and can feel the ridge of his scar against her mouth, but she presses back into him, her heart easing, longing, wanting, even though it is such a dangerous thing to want.

She loves him. And surely, with the way he is kissing her, with the way he is looking at her when they break apart, like he's caught and captured sunlight in an endless night, surely he loves her too.

"Remember," he says, holding her hand and tugging her pinky. "Never apologize."

She curls her little finger around his like a ring. "Okay."

She believes him. For less than a day, for only a few hours, she believes Fushiguro Toji, but when she returns from Saitama to Mount Mushiro, Toji has killed two children and mutilated a third.

Because in the end, what is it worth to be seen, if it is by a man who can do such things, all because he could not see his own?

free talk

hi everyone, thanks for being patient. as you can probably tell, i had a tough time coming out with this chapter-in light of roe v wade being overturned, it was hard to write yuna in regards to her unwanted motherhood and child, as well as satoru's disregard of her autonomy in the end when he exorcises the curse child. they will talk about this more next chapter, and the way the scene is written in satoru's pov (choppy, an afterthought) is intentional, but it is still very significant and shitty.

i truly miss writing toji. in gmm and this chapter, knowing he chooses and does unforgivable things overshadows every scene with yuna, making them all the more challenging and devastating. yuna is obviously an unreliable narrator, and loving toji remains one of her greatest mistakes, if not regrets. after ten years, though, she is able to look back on his character with more empathy and admit to herself that not all of it was false.

there are probs lots of mistakes that i'll need to edit, but thank you for reading and for waiting! please leave your thoughts - i'd love to hear them.

xoxo