Kelly's
Trina had woken up in Spencer's arms. IN SPENCER'S ARMS! It wasn't supposed to feel so good. It was better than she had imagined and she had imagined. What was she doing? She had a boyfriend.
"ugh." She sighed.
"Morning." Spencer smiled against her head.
"How do you feel?" She looked up at him.
"Like I have been hit by a truck, but I will be ok." She noticed their entwined state and started to move. "Please don't. I just want to have this morning, this bit of normalcy." He couldn't fully open his eyes, but he could see hers open, wide and imploring.
"I was supposed to meet Rory here for breakfast." She looked over at the clock on the nightstand.
"Cancel it." She chewed on her lip considering. She wanted to stay a while longer. Maybe he needed her to stay to ensure that he had something to eat and took care of the hangover she could tell he had.
"It seems to me that you want to. That you would rather French to dry toast." She sighed in frustration as he gave her his best puppy dog eyes. Even with a hangover he could be...arrogant...nerve wracking...and plain adorable. He tussled, gaze lazy, he was perfection.
"I shouldn't be here. What would Rory think if he walked in?" She asked.
"Do you really want me to answer that?" He raised an eyebrow.
"I just...I am not behaving like a woman in a relationship." He chewed on his lip.
"You are behaving like a woman denying her heart's desire by settling." That made her angry. She jumped out of bed making him miss the warmth of her and also causing the banging in his head to increase. He placed his hand over his eyes to ease the pain.
"Is that what you were doing all those months when you were flirting with me while with Esme?" He moved his hand so that he could look her in her eyes.
"Yes, yes that is exactly what I was doing." He admitted causing her to stumble backward. He had caught her off guard. They both jumped when there was a loud banging on the door. Thinking it was Cam, she brushed off her clothes then walked across the room to answer the door. She certainly wasn't expecting to find Rory. A feeling of unease settled in her stomach. She brushed it off as guilt. She was guilty, wasn't she? She had woken up in another man's arms. One who had hurt her when Rory had not done anything but be kind and patient.
"Unbelievable!" Rory spat.
"Isn't it?" Spencer huffed under his breath before lying back on the bed.
"What are you doing here?" Cam appeared behind him.
"Rory saw your bag on the table. Which wouldn't be peculiar if we were open. Officers usually get in prior to opening and closing just so that we are on the safe side when changing out money." Cam explained.
"Your friend Cam tried to cover for you by saying that you all spent a night here." That eased some of Trina's guilt. She was just trying to help a friend. She glared at him.
"If you want to accuse me of something don't be passive aggressive about it." She huffed feeling awkward to be standing there in that moment. Spencer was sprawled on the bed seemingly amused.
"You can't seriously not see how this looks?" She sighed gathering her inner strength and patience.
"I don't need a cover? That is exactly what happened. Spencer...Spencer needed his friends." Trina didn't want to admit to a cop that he had been drink as he was underage. Rory chose to trust her since she had been honest about her feelings for Spencer before they decided to become official.
"Is that why it smells like a distillery in here? Underage drinking is a crime." Rory was ready to place Spencer in cuffs, he looked over at him. He certainly looked worse for wear, red eyes, blotchy skin, messy hair. Spencer noticed him looking then waved with a smirk. He hated that smirk.
"I had quite a few shots with Spencer and Cam here." She shrugged not knowing in that moment, in that moment Spencer felt worse. There she was covering for him again. There he was making her life complicated and miserable. "Haven't you ever let loose with friends Rory?" She smiled prettily at him turning on her charm. It worked because he melted.
"Why do I feel like I am always letting you off the hook?" She looked at him bashfully from under her lashes.
"I am the excitement in your life that challenges the rules?" She was running on smoke and she knew it.
"You are at least one of those things. I do believe that we have a breakfast date." She smiled.
"Give me a second will ya?" He hesitated then nodded. Trina glanced at Cam to ensure that she and Spencer had privacy. Cam followed Rory downstairs.
Trina turned to Spencer. "I didn't know you were a minx. My little vixen." He grinned at her. "Your boyfriend, though, he is a walking red flag. Be careful of him, ok?" Taken aback she wanted to ask for an explanation but she knew better. His lips had set in a line and he had made up his mind. She didn't have time to change it.
"Spencer, for what it is worth, I am really sorry that you are hurt. They don't deserve you." Trina started. "Don't let them stop you from being you, the best you. Don't regress."
"You have no idea." He said sadly. "I am going to take the deal."
"You are?" She asked hopeful.
"Yeah, then I am leaving Port Charles. I am meant to jet set." He tried the smile, but it just wasn't in him, she noticed.
"Where will you go?" She tried to hide her emotions by crossing her arms which led to rubbing them before they settled into a hug. A protective stance that held her together.
"Anywhere. Everywhere. You know the saying, sometimes goodbye is a second chance. Maybe this is mine." He shrugged sadly. She turned away from him.
"Maybe it is." She shrugged not wanting to let him in, but the truth was, he never left. He was there, captivating her. Feelings that she wanted to forget lingered still. There was another saying, you never forget your first. Maybe it also goes that you never get over your first. Deep down she knew that she certainly wasn't over him. She didn't want him to leave but who was she to stop him?
"No matter where you go Spencer, you will still be Spencer Cassadine. There is beauty in that. Part of that beauty is never letting anyone make you doubt who you are. You are meant to do great things. Esno nor Dikolas can change that." He was shocked by her use of nicknames. It was unlike her. "When you are ready, come back..." She held his gaze. "You show them. Show them the man I know you are. She them the man you became in spite of them." She didn't notice that he had made his way over to her. He placed his hands on her waist then pulled her into a warm embrace.
"Your faith in me..." He inhaled a shaky breath, she was the contrast, the light to his shadows. "It...It means more than you know." He ran his fingers along the curve of her waist as his lips grazed the long slope of her neck. His warm breath tickled and excited, she shivered in response. She moved her head to his chest allowing it to rest there for a beat. Then another, and another, a sweet little dance. After a moment she pulled away.
I just wish you had more in me from the start. She thought sadly then turned and walked away.
I just want to tell you that I always had faith in you but the words never seem to come out. Spencer thought sadly as he stared at the door she had just walked out of.
Cam walked in the room abruptly as Spencer was sitting back on the bed. "That was close. I guess they are more serious than I thought." Cam said offhandedly.
"Ya think?" Spencer asked sarcastically, irritated by Cameron rubbing it in his face.
"I know, the thing is, what are you going to do about it?" Cam looked at him and Spencer snorted. "Trina stayed up all night watching after you."
"I am no good for her. Gomer Pyle is better suited with his picnics and and merit badges." Cameron laughed.
"Merit badges?" Spencer rolled his eyes.
"I imagine he has those and her father has probably awarded them at some point during his career." Cam laughed again then sat next to Spencer.
"You always had that big, overly exaggerated imagination." Spencer shrugged.
"Helped when most of my friends were imaginary." Cam yawned at his moment of pitying himself.
"Except me, Joss, and Emma." Spencer shrugged.
"Sometimes I felt like the friend no one really liked so I overcompensated." He laughed.
"Esme reminded me of how pathetic she found me when we met. My friends were fake. So in my mind, so were all of you." Cam took a moment to consider what he had said.
"I get you. However, you were stuck up. That made it difficult to trust you sometimes but to me, you were family and family is always there for each other. Even when annoying each other." Spencer shrugged.
"I was jealous. Then I saw what Emma went through and what you did." Cameron nodded.
"Then the fire, you became a bit more human." He admitted.
"Relatable." Spencer admitted.
"Yeah." Cam agreed. "But now, you are my brother. As such, I am going to be real with you. If you really love her, fight for her." Spencer listened.
"She admitted on the stand that she was in love with you at one point. She endured a lot. Add your secret, Spencer, she is protecting herself. It is up to you to remind her of the reasons she fell." Spencer nodded but he knew that he couldn't do that. There was that old saying, if you love something let it go. She'd be better off with out him.
Metro Court
After a fitful sleep with haunting dreams reminding him of his insecurities hosted by Esme, Spencer took a long hot shower. He started to think about his future. He couldn't turn his uncle in. Not after everything he had done to help him. He wanted Trina to be happy but there was a part of him, deep down, that wondered if he could make her happy. Did he deserve a chance to see if he could? To ask her to go away with him, if only for a short time to get back to the beginning. When he was Victor and not the Cassadine heir. When things were simpler and he could be himself without pretense. He ran the sponge over his chest stopping the space that held his heart. Heart warred with the mind, a frequent battle within. That time, it seemed that the heart would win. He decided to write her a letter.
Spencer had dressed, determined to tell the truth. Since he had taken to being tongue tied whenever he approached the subject of his feelings he decided to write them down.
Dear Trina,
He'd go to her house and he would give her the letter. He stood, determination set, he had a new purpose. To tell his love the truth, finally. He could only hope that she felt the same.
Trina's house
He was about to knock on the door when Portia met him. She looked behind herself to make sure no one else saw him. She quietly closed the door.
"Spencer, you weren't invited. I really appreciate what you did for Trina. I really do, but you also hurt her. Badly, she faced prison and expulsion for you." He could only hang his head.
"You met someone who could light up your life. Who has a big heart and only sees the best in people. You took that light and you dimmed it. You took her smile, the one that used to reach her eyes but stopped." Portia frowned then put a comforting hand on his arm.
"She is happy. I can't let you back in her life because though you might not mean to, you will destroy her. You will put her back in a dark place." He looked at Portia. She had no reason to hate him outside of the pain he caused. She liked him when he was Victor. Maybe she could like him again once she saw how much he loved her daughter. He scratched the back of his neck, it was wishful thinking.
"I love her. I would never...I know..." He sighed.
"If you love her, Spencer, if you really love her then you would put her first. She is on her way to her party. She is allowed to start the fall semester." Spencer nodded fighting his tears.
"I never meant for any of this to happen." Portia nodded empathetically.
"No. Still, your arrogance allowed you to lie to her for weeks about your identity. Made her look like a fool in front of her friends. Then when that was done, you blindside her with a girlfriend she never knew existed. You may not have meant it but you certainly set it into action. Leave her be." Portia went back into the house closing the door behind her.
Spencer looked at the letter, held it in front of him as he considered leaving it in the mailbox. He felt it being ripped from his hands. He looked up not expecting a face off.