Chapter Twenty: Consequences

Harry walked away from Umbridge's office shaking. It was his last night of detention with her, and his left hand was bleeding quite badly, and he had a sinking thought that it might scar.

That thought excited him. It's not the same, he told himself firmly. I didn't choose to do this, it isn't the same as cutting. He bit his lip and clenched his fist, feeling the cuts sting against the dirty rag he had wrapped around his hand. I won't relapse, I won't.

The next morning the clock read 3:45 AM when he woke up, drenched in sweat and craving his blade.

He got up quickly, and paced the room before moving to the common room. It was far too early to go run around the lake, but he could do some exercises here… no one would be up to see him for a few hours.

By the time he heard people stirring in the dorms above, his whole body hurt from doing countless crunches and push ups. Shaking a bit as he stood, he wandered upstairs to shower, popping a pill before he got in.

Harry hadn't told Draco about the pills, something told him even his bulimic friend would recognize that drugs were crossing a line. But that didn't stop Draco from noticing his odd behavior. "Are you sure you're okay?" He asked worriedly one day as they checked in after potions lab.

Harry shrugged, "I'm fine, normal."

Draco sighed and shook his head "your hands were shaking back there, you could barely stir your potion…"

Harry shrugged "yeah, Erm, that's a side effect of one of the meds they have me on… it's supposed to get better after a while." He explained, using the excuse Hermione had given him.

Draco nodded, not looking convinced. "Okay…. As long as you're not starving yourself to the point of tremors… that's not usually a good sign."

Harry rolled his eyes "you would know." He grumbled. After a moment he tilted his chin towards his friend. "you're looking a bit pale there, since we're on the subject…"

Draco crossed his arms over his body, scowling. "I'm fine Harry," he held up his hands in air quotes "normal".

Harry sighed "I thought things were getting better, Umbridge is finally off your back right?"

Draco nodded, his lips tight. He had never told Harry what had occured during his detention, and since Harry's own experience, they had not discussed it.

Harry nodded and started walking down the hall. "Okay then, I'll see you next week I guess…"

Things stayed quiet until exam week. Draco had gone home the weekend before for a formal dinner party that his parents were hosting. It wasn't until Tuesday, after lab, that Harry was able to get a close enough look at him to get worried.

They walked slowly, Harry could see that Draco was tired, and he appeared to be in pain. "Are you okay?" He asked quietly. Once they were in a secluded enough area he stopped walking and leaned against the wall.

Draco looked pale, he was slow to respond, clearly trying to keep up a brave face. "Yeah, fine." He said curtly.

Harry bit his lip, waiting. He and Draco had promised each other they would be honest, he just needed to give him time.

The silence lingered for a long time, eventually they sunk to the ground, leaning their backs on the cool stone. After what seemed like ages, longer than they had ever lingered after a lab before, Draco spoke. "The dinner didn't go well," his voice was very quiet, and sounded broken.

Harry sighed, "I'm sorry Dray, what happened?"

Draco shrugged, staring straight ahead, as if he wasn't even aware of Harry sitting next to him. "Just about what you'd expect… My father made it clear that I was to act a certain way, be polite… entertain people… act normal. It's not really like he's asking for that much. I tried, I really did. I told myself I just wouldn't eat much, and that I would be okay. But my mother kept insisting, and he just kept watching my plate. It pissed me off… I could have done it if they had just let me be, but it's like they were watching for me to fail.'

Draco paused uncertainly, not wanting to continue. "I managed to slip away quietly, but one of the guests followed, I guess she needed to use the restroom and assumed that was where I was going. I didn't know she was there… I didn't realize she could hear me…. She went and got my parents… told them I was sick."

Harry nodded in understanding, but stayed quiet, giving his friend time to verbalize what had happened.

"Of course they acted all worried, told people I must have come down with the flu… they sent me straight up to bed. It was a few hours later that their guests finally left… My father was… not pleased with me."

Harry reached out to squeeze his friend's arm, he wasn't too comfortable with physical contact, but he knew that Draco often craved it… and never got it at home. As he took his friend's hand he saw him flinch, clearly in pain. That was when Harry finally spoke up. "Draco, are you hurt?" He asked worriedly, reaching to pull up his friend's sleeve.

Draco scrambled backwards, shaking his head. "No!" he said far too quickly "I'm fine, it's fine!"

Harry's heart sank, he knew the look in his friend's eyes all too well. He understood the fear, he knew what it meant. "Draco," he said as calmly as he could, "Did your father hurt you?" They had talked about this before, the Malfoy's were horrible, but their abuse had always been verbal.

When Draco shook his head frantically, Harry sighed and stood. "Come on," he said quietly, offering Draco a hand.

A look of confusion blocked out Draco's fear for a moment. "What? Where are we going?"

"To Snape's office," Harry said simply. He was trying to stay calm, he had to for Draco's sake, but inside he was in a panic. They had to tell someone, he couldn't let his friend continue to be hurt like that, but he knew that by telling, he would probably have to out himself as well.

Draco stood, but backed away, shaking his head frantically. "No, we don't have to… it was just a one time thing Harry. He's been so stressed about work… about everything going on… and this dinner was important. He wanted to show me off, to show people how powerful the Malfoy's are. I messed it up, it was my fault."

Harry sighed, and turned to walk away. "Fine, I'll tell him without you. I have to Dray, it's wrong, Parents aren't supposed to beat their kids. And I can tell you from experience, it wasn't a one time thing… it will only get worse. He could kill you!" Harry was surprised at his own words, they had been said to him before, and he didn't believe them, but he could believe with conviction that Draco needed the help he had tried to avoid.

Draco got angry now, walking quickly to cut Harry off. "I'll tell Severus about you, how you've been fooling everyone!"

Harry pressed on, both of them walking quickly now. "Fine," he said, not looking at Draco, he was terrified, but determined.

They walked swiftly, practically racing each other towards Snape's office. Harry didn't realize his heart was pounding until they burst through the door. But before he could speak, the room started to waver around him. Snape stood, his face shifting from annoyance to concern with remarkable speed. It was the last thing that he saw before the world went black.