Guys! I got a real job! Omg! Crazy! What does this mean? Idk. We'll have to see what happens when I start next month. I literally only have to worry about work and not work and an internship and school so I feel like it'll be fine. I really wanted to keep up with this fic. I've had so much fun coming back and working on this and having an excuse to rewatch all of Criminal Minds (not that I really need an excuse). That's what I got for personal news!

So, for story news, eh, I hope this is good? I tried several different ways to write this chapter and I was just lukewarm with it all but I wanted to be done with it and this was the most okayest version and the best version I knew I could write. Speaking of... I've only done lemons a few times and I feel like I'm not the best but I wanted to try and get better so here we are. Sorry if it's trash lol.

Also, also I DID look up when the 50th of Doctor Who came out and it was the same year as season 8 so I was like hell yeah we're doing it the 50th was such an event I totally say it in theaters. Anyways, I've been vague with timeline shit because 1) Idk what I'm doing anymore 2) it stresses me out so I'm just trying to ignore it so I don't drive myself up a wall 3) way back when I really wanted to hit season 8 & 9 for the plot and now I'm like no no I want 12 but I started so early in the game that I'm like ok we're just gonna speed this shit up so lets not talk to much about it and just enjoy. I'm rambling. You guys don't care.

I was grabbing my things to leave when Penelope came barging in. "Dolly! What are you doing Friday night?!" She was out of breath and excited.

"Um, I had planned on drinking a lot of wine in the bath. Why?"

She didn't say anything, only grabbed my hand and dragged me out of my office. Down the stairs, Spencer was standing by his desk, watching us. "My geeky Boy Wonder!" Penelope yelled as we approached him. "I may be indisposed on Friday, but this lovely blondie is free. And," she said, pushing me forward. "I happened to know she likes Doctor Who."

Spencer's face lit up. "You do!? I had no idea!"

I looked at Penny and rolled my eyes. "I wouldn't say I'm a full fledge Whovian-"

"See," said Penelope smiling, "she knows the lingo."

"I watched a lot of classic Who with my dad. He's a big fan of Tom Baker and Peter Davidson. I haven't routinely kept up since Tennant regenerated. And working here, you know, it's hard to watch a lot of TV."

"How did I not know this before?" Spencer looked from Penelope to me.

I smiled. "You never asked. And I guess Penny never told you?"

"This is amazing," he said, coming to my side. "I have tickets to see the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who in theaters. Garcia was supposed to come but-"

"A very important and inescapable thing has come up!" She said, a little too quick.

I gave her the side eye which I know she saw but she chose to ignore it. Turning my attention back to Spencer, I said, "I'd love to go. I might need a quick recap on where we are story wise."

"That's fine!" He said, still looking giddy that I would go. And also looking so adorable. "We have a few days."

He started to head out and on instinct I followed him, leaving Penny behind but knowing she would be calling me later tonight. "How do you keep up?" I asked when we got into the elevator. "You don't have a TV or an internet connection."

He pressed the button to get us to the ground floor. "Magazines sometimes. Also, the library. The one by me lets you borrow DVDs, and I can usually watch them there too or sometimes Garcia lets me use her laptop."

I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. "Penny lets you touch her laptop."

"Oh no, she slaps me if I touch it." I laughed at how nonplussed he was being. "I can only watch it under her direct supervision. Which usually works as we'll sometimes marathon it."

I knew Penelope liked Doctor Who. We had talked about it a little bit; she was more into it then I was. She had mentioned watching with Spencer, but I never paid it much attention. Clearly, I should have.

"Well," I said as I headed to the parking lot. I had driven into work today. "Maybe if you borrow some of those DVD's we can watch them at my place before Friday."

"I'd love that!" He said, following me. "I'm a little bit behind as well. It would be nice to get caught up together."

Reaching my car, I fished my keys out to unlock it. "Wanna ride home? You can give me more of the highlights of stuff that I've missed."

"Isn't that out of your way?"

I shrugged. "Like an extra twenty minutes-"

"Twenty-eight depending on traffic," he said.

I smiled. "Well, if I drive fast, I can cut that down to twenty." I opened the car door. "Get in, Reid."

He went around to the passenger door, smiling as well. "So," he said, getting in, shutting the door, and putting on his seat belt. I followed suit. "You said you haven't kept up since David Tennant? Have you seen anything of Matt Smith?"

I turned the car on. "A few episodes here and there. I know Penny adores him."

"He's definitely her favorite. She dressed up as him for a convention we went to a couple years ago."

"I think I remember that!" I laughed, thinking of the pictures she sent me. "If I wasn't visiting my dad that weekend, I would have gone too."

Xoxo

Unfortunately, we got a case on Thursday night, and we weren't home to catch the special in theaters. I was bummed. Spencer and I had spent the last couple nights watching plenty of Doctor Who. While I wasn't fully caught up, I felt more prepared.

Thankfully the case didn't last long. Two days later we were on a jet home. Even though Spencer and I missed our movie date, BBC was airing the special on television as well. We were able to just alter our original plans. Once we came back, we made our way back to my place.

I'd missed just hanging out with Spencer. Rebuilding our friendship had been long and hard but I felt like we had finally reached a point we were back before we made out. He leaned on me a lot after Maeve died which I was glad to help him with. Even if I had to read a book I detest, I wanted to be there for him. Slowly, over the months, it changed from a need to a want. He didn't need me to help him cope with his loss, he wanted me around.

The BBC seemed to be running continuously on the 50th and The End of Time. After our first watch of both, we ordered delivery. By the time we were finishing our second watch, we had eaten and re-snuggled up on my couch.

I was sitting closer to him this time. Our shoulders were almost brushing. I know my heart was racing was the closeness.

"This has been one of the most fun nights," I said as the loop on television continued.

He looked over at me and smiled. "I agree! I wish I knew you liked Doctor Who sooner. No one else on the team lets me talk about it but Garcia."

"Well," I said, putting my hand on his knee. "I'm all ears. Always."

"You know I knitted my own replica of Tom Barker's scarf for the convention?"

"I had no idea you could knit! That's so cool, Spencer. I'd love to see it sometime."

"I'd love to show you." His voice trailed off as he stared into my eyes. I didn't realize I had learned so close to him.

I wasn't sure what to do as the silence fell between us. I didn't want to risk anything to ruin the friendship we had painstakingly rebuilt between us. Even if I still had so many feelings for him. No matter how hard I tried to push them away they always came back.

Glancing from his eyes (maybe also his lips) back to where my hand was on his leg, I started to pull away. Until he stopped me. He put his left hand on top of mine and with his right he cautiously cupped my cheek.

I wanted to speak. To say something as our foreheads now rested against each other, but I couldn't. My voice was lost from his touch.

Any words I had hoped to get out were snatched when he kissed me. Slow and hungry. I felt his kiss through every vein in my body making my skin tingle.

Work pants weren't the best for stretching, but that didn't stop me as I straddled his lap again. A new fire was set inside of me and if this moment was all we were going to get I was going to live it up.

I sank down on him, cupping his face as I kissed him back. My tongue in his mouth. The feeling of him growing hard under me made me feel like I was on fire. Invincible.

This time, I was not wearing a cardigan to simply shrug off. Of fucking course, I had a button up blouse. Tiny, intricate buttons that were taking way too long to come undone. "Rip it," I breathed against his lips as his fingers continued to take too long. He complied, yanking at my blouse. The buttons went flying across the room. A mess to clean at a later time.

Once free, I shrugged that off, and went back to kissing him. His fingers were warm against my back, pulling me as close as he could.

I wanted him to touch me. Anywhere and everywhere. I wanted to touch him too.

He helped me in taking off his sweater vest and shirt. Much easier to remove than mine. The buttons were not as small. Once they were gone, I ran my hands up and down his bare chest. Needing to feel as much of him as I could.

Every time he touched me, kissed me, my desire for him grew. As he unhooked my bra and let it fall, I said, "I want you."

He stopped kissing me, instead pushing my hair back and cupping my face. My eyes felt heavy with lust as I tried to focus in on his face. "Spencer…" My voice was quiet yet raspy. My throat dry from so much kissing and heavy breathing. He responded by kissing me again, hard and long.

I started to undo my pants as his tongue went over mine. It wasn't easy trying to shimmy and shake my pants off without getting fully off of his lap. Without his big, strong hands grabbing at my waist I would have toppled over.

"You're beautiful," he said as he started to kiss down my neck once my pants were now gone. My mind could no longer form words, just gasps and moans as he kept kissing me. Kept moving his hands until one was again behind my back and the other was grasping my bare thigh. I gave my head a weak nod for him to continue moving. The moment he reached the center of my panties, my true desire, I shook, already so dangerously close to collapsing.

His motions were soft but fast, almost testing to see how I would respond to the stimulation. He was a man of science after all. The buildup was quick; I was already so intoxicated just by kissing him.

I tried so hard to hang on, teetering on an edge I knew if I fell over there was no going back. "Hey." His voice was gentle as he weaved his free hand into my hair. He pulled my forehead against his to rest. "I got you."

I nearly cried as I toppled over, shaking and desperately holding onto him. "Spencer…" His name was the only thing I could focus on. The only thought in my head.

He helped me through my orgasm, his fingers slowly stroking me through my panties. He finally moved them away from my core as I started to come down. As my mind became clearer, I brought my attention to his erection that was straining against my leg.

"I need you," I breathed, my hands going to his pants and trying to undo them as quickly as I could.

He nodded his approval, helping me with his belt. "Do you have condoms?" He asked.

"Yeah," I said as he pushed down his pants and boxers. "But I'm on the pill and clean. You?"

My eyes were glued to dick as he pulled it out. Hard and leaking. I shivered at the thought of it being inside of me. "Clean," he grunted as I just went for it and grabbed his cock.

My panties were still on and at this point I didn't want to fuss with taking them off. Pushing them to the side would be good enough. I met his eyes before I did anything though, wanting to make sure he was fine with it. His nod was all I needed to guide his cock inside of me.

Groaning at the same time, I grabbed onto his shoulders for support. "Fuck…" The word slipped out as I started rocking my hips back and forth. After so much anticipation, finally having him inside me made me melt into him. The pleasure indescribable and consuming.

His fingers were digging into my waist as I rocked. I knew I'd have imprints from his nails in my flesh. The pressure was making me move faster.

"Lila…" My name sounded like honey coming from him. Sweet and thick. I kissed him again, hoping to taste it.

Testing it, I lifted myself up with my thighs, coming back down to take his cock back inside me. I shuddered, moaning at just how good he felt. How I felt him everywhere.

His grip on me tightened. "Lila," he said again, voice strained. "I can't last. I'm gonna cum."

As much as I wanted it to last longer, I couldn't help but feel a bit of pride. "That's fine," I said, kissing his cheek and down his jaw.

He wrapped his arms around my whole body, keeping me close and still. As his breathing became more labored, I squeezed as hard as I could around him, relishing in the light string of swears he said as he came.

I kissed him again, long and lazy. My tongue gliding along his. Pulling back to bite his lip. After a few moments, he loosened his grip on me, not panting quite as hard.

My head felt like it was in a fog. I felt nothing in that moment but bliss as our kisses continued. I wanted nothing more, needed nothing more, than him.

There was no stopping the words that tumbled out of my mouth. "I love you."

I froze, hearing myself speak them. What the fuck have I just done?

"Lila," he started, and I hated it.

I pulled away. "I'm sorry," I rushed, pulling away from him. "I never should have said anything."

"Li-"

I pushed myself up and started to grab my clothes. "I'm so fucking stupid." I found my bra and started putting that back on while trying to avoid looking at Spencer. "I shouldn't've said anything. Shouldn't've done anything."

"Lila, stop-"

"You don't feel the same. I never should have assumed you felt anything for me." I picked up his shirt and tossed it towards the couch, not looking to see if he got it. "You probably still love Maeve. It hasn't been that long."

"Thirteen months, two weeks, and five days." Of course, he knew exactly how long.

"That's nothing," I said though I really had no idea if that was enough time to process a loss like that or not. "I'm an idiot and I ruined everything."

I had been trying so hard not to look at him that I failed to notice he had risen from the couch until he grabbed my arm. "You didn't ruin anything."

Mustering up whatever courage I had, I met his eyes. "We just had sex and I confessed my feelings."

"Your feelings haven't really been a secret."

"Is that supposed to make me feel any less like an ass?"

"No, that's not…" He ran a hand threw his hair. "Just sit down so we can talk about it."

I hesitated. "I'm still mostly naked."

His face reddened. "I kinda, um, prefer you that way."

The compliment still felt good, so I agreed and sat back now. Next to him, not on top.

"Spencer," I started, wanting to just say my piece and be done with it. "I've honestly been in love with you since day one. I just… I can't explain it. It just felt so different than anything I ever felt towards Ben, and I didn't know how to handle it so I just panicked and ignored it and now I'm petrified that I'll never get over this feeling and I don't know if I even want to-"

He cut me off with another, softer kiss. "Lila," he said once I was silenced. "I do love you. I have for a while."

"Oh," I said, dazed by his kisses and his words. "I… didn't expect that?"

Another quick kiss. "I'm just… nervous?"

"About what?"

He looked down. "The last time I was in love it didn't end well."

"Yeah, that's fair."

"And we don't have the best track record."

"That's also fair."

There was a silence that I did not know how to fill. I knew I would give it all at a chance to actually be with him. I fucked that up once I was not about to fuck it up again. But I couldn't force him into anything he didn't want. I did know that now I couldn't go back to exactly how things were. Not after having sex with him.

Thankfully, he spoke up. "I don't know if it's from the oxytocin, but I want to try."

It was my turn to kiss him, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I love you," I muttered against his lips.

"I love you." He repeated my words, cupping my face in his large hands. The sentiment made my heart swell, and I felt the happiest I had been in a while.

Xoxo

"This traffic is the worst! We're running so late!" I was growing frustrated. There was an accident on the road that was making the traffic horrendous and thus causing Spencer and I to be running really late into the office for a case.

"You told Hotch we were in traffic. He's not going to hold that against us," Spencer said, being a lot calmer than I was.

I sighed. "That doesn't mean I like being late."

Once we finally reached the BAU, we both rushed to our floor and the conference room. Everyone was already there and Hotch was going over the details of the case when we entered.

"Sorry!" I rushed, pulling up a seat next to Morgan. Spencer sat down next to me and JJ. "There was an accident-"

As I sat down, I realized everyone was staring at the two of us. "Made us a bit late…" I trailed off, noticing smirks on several faces.

"An accident?" JJ glanced at us before making a show of turning her attention back to the case files.

Morgan snickered, "Must have been with a fire truck."

"I think three cars…" Penelope didn't stop staring at us and Rossi was smiling to himself and glancing at Blake. Hotch was unfazed. I opened my mouth to ask what they were looking at when I caught Spencer in the corner of my eye. His hair was dripping wet. So was mine. The weather was perfectly average, not a cloud in the sky. And we rushed in here together, probably looking unkempt and frazzled. There was no good way to explain it.

I threw my head back muttering, "Fuck."

Spencer raised his eyebrows at me, still not picking up on what was happening. Well, there was no trying to be coy.

Sighing, I said, "Spence, we rushed in here, extremely late, with wet hair. It looks like we just had shower sex." We didn't… well, we were getting there. It was shower foreplay after Spencer had rattled off the statistics of accidents during actual shower sex.

Morgan reached around me to slap Spencer on the back, making the latter's face instantly red.

Before the rest of the team could get out of hand, Hotch cleared his throat. "Anyway," he said, carrying on with the case as if nothing happened. I found it so hard to pay attention to anything he was saying. Wandering eyes still peeking over at Spencer and myself.

"Wheels up in twenty," Hotch finally finished, dismissing us. As we stood to leave, he added, "O'Haul, Reid, a word."

Thankfully, no one made any more verbal comments as they filed out. I'm sure they were waiting until they were out of the room before gossiping.

Once the room was clear, I started. "Hotch, I am so so sorry."

"There really was an accident-" Spencer also started to add.

Our boss held up his hand to stop us. "I know. Blake got in a few minutes before you did because of it. My concern is whatever is happening between you two. I don't care what it is, whatever makes you happy. I just want to make sure it doesn't interfere with the integrity of the team. If you're in a sexual or romantic relationship with each other I need to know that you'll still, follow orders and not put your personal feelings for each other before any other command."

"Working here is top priority for both of us," Spencer said. "We'd never do anything to jeopardize that."

I nodded in agreement. "We'll keep our personal and professional lives separate. Promise."

Hotch looked between the two of us quickly. "I trust you to stick to that." He grabbed his file from the table. "And I'm happy for you both," he added before walking out of the room, leaving Spencer and I alone.

"We're gonna have so many questions," I said, noticing that most of our teammates were loitering down by their desks, slowly getting their go bags while trying to inconspicuously look up at us.

"Yeah," he said, fidgeting with his fingers. Nervous. "This isn't going to be fun."

I reached out and brushed my fingers against the back of his hand, drawing his attention to me. "Hey," I said softly, "I love you. I don't care about anything else."

His smile was sweet and shy. "I love you too."

Ok, so, this is it. It happened. They're together now. Are we happy? Because I am! Now for fun stuff! I hope. Idk. We're half making it up as we go! As always, I love hearing from you guys. It literally makes my whole ass week. Also, I'm thinking of maybe posting on AO3 as well? I haven't fully made up my mind yet. I've never posted there before and the tagging system intimidates me. Let me know if you have any thoughts! Any at all. Please talk to me.