Chapter 2

Long Way Down

Cor was fairly certain that he had his little 'crush' under control.

Titus had startled him, had given him a reality check if only by causing fear, and Cor had spent every night since then forcing himself to control his sentiments. Shouldn't'a been so damn hard; he had been suppressing emotions his entire life. Why should this have been any different? In theory, it was simple. In practice, well... He'd cross that bridge when he got to it.

Was pretty sure he had it now. He beat it down, didn't let it come out, forced himself to pretend nothing had happened at all, and for just a while there, Cor had actually been doing pretty well. Had been, anyway, because as usual there was another set back, and as usual it was Titus' doing.

Cor had never seen it coming, though he likely should have.

Spring came, and Ignis was barely sixteen.

Suddenly...

There was a big problem, because Cor looked down at his roster of new students for the year and had seen a name that made his stomach lurch and heart skip.

Ignis Scientia.

Enrolled in the Crownsguard? Whose brilliant idea had that been?

Cor stared at the paper for far longer than he would have liked, and when he finally woke up, he marched straight to Regis and asked, sternly, "Why is Ignis enrolled in Crownsguard training?"

Regis, oblivious to Cor's inner turmoil, just smiled and said, smoothly, "He will be Noctis' Hand in the future. Training seems prudent."

Cor disagreed, and said as much.

"Forgive me, Majesty, but Ignis' position requires only sharp mental skills. If I may, I fear Ignis is too gentle to excel in combat. Personal lessons with a private instructor would be better suited to Ignis. I don't wish to have him in a class of ruffians. He'll be overwhelmed."

Regis quirked a brow, smirked a little, and teased, "Afraid he'll wilt?"

Cor met Regis' gaze, and drawled, with no hint of humor, "Like a cut flower."

In Cor's eyes, Ignis was just that—a flower. Beautiful and elegant, but quick to bruise, quick to wilt, quick to wither up under pressure or extremes. Didn't want to see him in a battle, because the thought of Ignis being beat up on would be the same as seeing little Iris getting pummeled. Couldn't stomach that. Wasn't right.

Regis snorted, and clapped a hand on Cor's shoulder. "If there's anyone I trust that can turn a housewife into a warrior, it's you. Ignis has potential. I can see it. If someone is willing to put effort into him, he'll thrive. Trust me this once, my old friend. Ignis will excel."

A rush of anger.

Ignis didn't need to become a warrior, and if he wanted to be a housewife then it wasn't fair for Regis to throw him into the fire to change him into something else.

Regis wasn't blind to Cor's feelings, no doubt, because he was quick to ask, very seriously, "Would you rather train him personally? If it bothers you so. I thought if he were with Gladiolus it would be alright."

A horrible jolt of anxiety. Adrenaline.

Absolutely not. Couldn't train Ignis personally, in private, because he didn't trust himself to keep his hands still around Ignis. Cor furrowed his brow, pursed his lips, and didn't know what to say. Didn't want Ignis in public classes, but dreaded more having him in private ones.

What to do.

Regis was far too astute for his own good, far too clever, just like goddamn Titus, and Cor actually felt a little nauseous when Regis sent him a rather knowing look, very close to leering.

...just like goddamn Titus.

Uncanny.

Oh gods—had Cor been caught staring? Was this all some kind of trick? A trap? Was Regis on to him? Was this some sick little game that Regis was setting into motion? Titus was always plotting, thinking, toying around with him. Had Titus planted this idea in Regis' head? Oh, Six above, if Titus had told Regis about Cor's little infatuation—

Felt honestly sick, and so all Cor could do was brace his feet and say, in a whisper that broke, "No. I don't think that will be possible."

For more reasons than one.

Regis smiled, in that awful manner that made Cor twist, and said, cheerily, "There it is then. Fear not, Cor. Gladiolus will keep a very good eye on him. It will be fine. You'll see."

Fine.

Cor narrowed his eyes and clamped his jaw, because what he really wanted to say to Regis was neither friendly nor polite.

All Cor could do was accept defeat, nod his head, and turn away, paper clenched his hand, and as he walked he wished that he could have said to Regis that he shouldn't have to turn Ignis from a housewife into a warrior. Shouldn't have to invest time in beating Ignis into shape. Shouldn't have been forced to force Ignis in turn to fight. Ignis, for whatever reason, had been sworn to Noctis when he had been four. He had had no choice, no say, and his entire life had been decided for him.

Made Cor so angry, and he couldn't say why.

Ignis had done only what others had wanted him to. Sixteen years old, and yet had had no childhood. Had never known truly what it was like to be young and free, to be a true teenager. Ignis' youth had been robbed of him, and it didn't seem right now to take him out of a routine he had grown comfortable with, just to attempt to turn him into a bodyguard. Noctis already had one of those. A tactician wasn't a first line of defense, and yeah, Cor knew that obviously Ignis needed combat training, there was no way around it, but goddamn if Cor wasn't in denial.

A man who wanted excuses would find a million.

Ignis was gentle, calm, brilliant. Ignis was not a fighter. Ignis lacked that edge, that toughness, that confidence and aggression. Ignis was not Gladiolus, and it wasn't fair to sign them up together and expect the same results. Ignis was the Hand of the King, not his Shield. Didn't seem right.

Maybe, more than actual concern for Ignis, Cor dreaded having Ignis in his class only because he already had a mild obsession with Ignis and having to see him for hours every day was only going to make things worse. He had finally found a balance and had been able to carry on; having Ignis near would undo every bit of effort Cor had given.

No choice.

Later that afternoon, when the council gathered, Cor crossed his arms over his chest and glared silently from across the room right at Titus, who held his chin high and smugly stared right back at him, lips twitching.

Cor absolutely felt Titus' hand upon this venture, and wondered momentarily if Titus actually had some evil mastermind plan to legitimately get Cor arrested.

Son of a bitch.

Titus looked happy as a clam over there by Regis' side, not a care in the world, as Cor had a minor mental meltdown. Cor never let his burning glare up from Titus, but out of his peripheral he swore he saw Regis glancing back and forth between them, and that was very likely what had made Cor positive that this entire thing had been Titus' idea. Woulda killed him for it, too, if he wasn't about to dissolve into a puddle at the thought of having to train Ignis in the next few weeks.

Cor made sure that Titus knew he was highly displeased, by slamming his shoulder into Titus' on the way out, aggressively body checking him, and all Cor really accomplished was getting something that was very nearly a titter from Titus.

Every so often, Cor hated everyone around him.

Ignis, however, seemed excited.

Not the reaction Cor had expected nor hoped for. He had hoped that Ignis would be anxious, nervous, uncertain, that maybe Ignis would get cold feet and Cor would therefore have cause to remove Ignis from training and delay it if only by a few more years.

But Ignis was excited.

The day after getting the news, Cor found Ignis and Gladiolus walking side by side down the hall, and very quickly stepped into pace with them.

Ignis glanced over at him, smiled cheerily, and said, "Morning, Marshal!"

Bright and alert, as usual, no concern at all, and Gladiolus looked content as well. Cor inclined his head politely, and tested the waters by saying, calmly, "Ignis, I see you have been enrolled in my classes."

Instead of fidgeting as Cor had hoped, Ignis' smile grew wider, brighter, prettier, and Ignis very eagerly offered, "Yes, sir! I'm very much looking forward to it."

Cor pursed his lips, furrowed his brow, and looked straight ahead as he walked, contemplating.

Well, damn. Kinda ruined that plan.

Gladio reached out, clapped Ignis on the back, and said, "Can't wait! One less thing for me to worry about once you can kick ass on your own."

Ignis, ever catty, teased, "Even if that includes yours?"

Cor very nearly snorted, nearly, but was too worried about this entire ordeal to enjoy Ignis' ever present wit. So Cor looked over once more, to find Ignis still staring at him (that was a jolt!), and he lowered his voice as he said, "If you have any concerns, feel free to come to me."

Ignis' smile was much softer then, and prettier for it.

Cor felt that dumb daze creeping up, the one only Ignis seemed to cast over him, and he knew it was time to go before he made a fool of himself.

So he stepped out of pace, headed off, and merely called, "I'll see you then."

Lame.

His heart was pounding as he slunk away in shame. Hard to describe what he felt then, disappointed in himself for being so charm-less but also disappointed in himself for ever wanting to be more charming in the first place.

Ignis was excited to be in Cor's classes, and Cor couldn't push down the thrill, however hard he tried that time.

Thank the gods that Cor's face had so much practice in being blank, because Titus happened to pass him by then, and smiled away as he looked Cor up and down with an observant eye. Embarrassing, because there was a slight possibility that Cor had gotten new jeans and waxed his boots and he may or may not have gotten a brand new cologne the evening prior, what with this new development, and there was no doubt that Titus noticed every single bit of it.

That awful smirk.

As they passed, Titus looked over and Cor did not, but he heard Titus' breathy whisper all the same :

"Looking good today, Marshal. Shouldn't've gone through all that trouble for me. Oh, wait..."

Cor walked on, and didn't bother giving Titus the time of day.

Those two weeks went by remarkably fast, and Cor spent most of his time pacing his living room in helpless circles and all but ripping his hair out as he tried in vain to just magically make himself fall out of love with Ignis before the classes started.

As could be expected, he was entirely unsuccessful.

And then it was time.

Cor didn't sleep at all the night before, staring up at his ceiling and fretting away, and then he all but rolled right out of bed at three in the morning and started pacing around the kitchen.

Today, Ignis would be standing there before him as a student, and now not only would Cor be in love with a child, he would also be in love with a pupil. Couldn't have gotten worse, it really couldn't have gotten any goddamn worse, and Cor was sick to his stomach but still went into the bathroom and preened anyway. Ignis was always so neat; best to keep up appearances.

Just in case.

Ignis stared at everyone and everything, always analyzing, and when Ignis' razor eyes fell upon Cor he wanted to make sure that he made at least a decent impression, if not a great one.

Still felt jittery and nauseous by the time he was in the training room, pacing yet again as he waited for the students to file in. As expected, Ignis was the first one there, Gladio on his heels, because Ignis was remarkably punctual.

Cor's pulse started racing, taken aback by Ignis' presence, and also...

Cor tilted his head, curiously, and couldn't help but say, gruffly, "That's different."

Ignis' hair, that was; he had brushed his bangs back and up, out of his face, and it was the first time Cor had ever seen Ignis' full face with no hair over his forehead. It was...

Beautiful?

He was wearing that already ridiculous word out, but with Ignis' bone structure seeing his entire face in length was quite the sight. Perhaps because it was different, but it was very becoming, and made Ignis look older than he was, which was extremely important to Cor.

Ignis shifted his weight, raised a hand up to his hair to push it farther back, and he said, in that deep rumble Cor so liked, "Gladio thought it best to have it out of my eyes."

Gladio, always so protective, even to the smallest details.

Cor could have just nodded, could have said nothing at all, could have literally done any single thing except for what he did, because what he did then was to say, far more eagerly than he meant to, "It looks nice."

What—? No. Damn, damn, damn. Why had he said that? And in that higher, less stoic voice, god-fuckin'-dammit—

Ignis seemed flattered, Gladio smirked happily, doting big brother that he was, and Cor turned his back to them because he was worried his cheeks were pink. So stupid. It wasn't that Cor was awful at flirtation (though he kinda was) but rather that he was trying not to be flirtatious at all because he wasn't supposed to be in love.

Ignis made it very hard.

The other students trickled in, and Cor fidgeted and pattered about to look busy until everyone was assembled.

"Attention!" Cor barked, when all heads were accounted for, and Cor was antsy to see Ignis right there in the front row, staring away at him with those sharp eyes.

He wasn't nervous, he wasn't. Really.

When postures were perfect and there was silence, Cor looked the students over, and began the speech he had used every single year for every single new batch of students.

"You are now in service to the Kings of Lucis. During your time in the Crownsguard, your actions and words are no longer your own—they belong to the Crown, for they reflect upon the Crown. Thinking before you act will now be your top priority. We are not Glaives. We're not going outside the walls to fight of daemons. We're the shadows behind the wall. Off scene, filling in the inner gaps the Glaives leave open. We are calm. We are collected. We work as a unit, with full cooperation. There are no heroes in the Crownsguard. No one man is more important than the next. We check our egos at the door. There will be no...unnecessary...grandstanding..."

Cor trailed very slowly off, as the door suddenly opened and an unexpected intruder came marching inside. Cor turned his head, staring wide-eyed and aghast, as Titus goddamn Drautos shamelessly barged right into Cor's territory. Speak of the devil.

Twenty years, and never once had Titus been so uncouth.

Cor was outraged, but was far more terrified by what Titus was planning and therefore unable to even find his voice long enough to give Titus a verbal reaming.

The students, at seeing the imposing Captain of the Kingsglaive in full uniform, straightened up somehow into even more perfect posture. Ignis in particular, enamored as he was with all authority.

Ugh. Disgusting.

Titus met Ignis' eyes before anyone else's, because Titus was a master mechanic and knew how to push every single one of Cor's buttons and knew precisely which wires to cross. Ignis respectfully inclined his head, ever so quickly so as not to break rank, and then Titus turned his pale eyes over to Cor.

"Good morning, Marshal," he began, in that infuriatingly soothing voice. "Hope I'm not so unwelcome."

Exceedingly, but in front of twenty new Crownsguard recruits, Cor couldn't exactly tell Titus to go jump off a cliff and die.

Instead, Cor said, in a voice so terse it nearly broke, "I suppose it will depend on the meaning of this intrusion."

Titus, so clever and always ready with a handful of brilliant excuses for any situation, gave Cor a quick wink and then turned to face the students to say, "This is the first time you've had students in your class that will directly work hand in hand with the future King. I merely came to extend to them my assistance."

Cor clamped his jaw so tightly in anger that he possibly chipped a tooth.

Assistance?

Titus, rather than address the class entire, lifted his hand in the air and crooked his finger to beckon Gladiolus and Ignis forward. They broke rank and joined Titus in the front, and Titus observed them both equally in turn.

"Fine form you're both in," Titus said, as Cor lurked right behind him. "Shield, I trust this course is merely a formality for you?"

"Sure is," Gladiolus assured.

"Good. But don't be too cocky. The Marshal has a thing or two left yet to show you. Ignis. How are you holding up? You're not feeling put upon by this?"

Ah. That may have been it.

Titus was the reason Ignis had been enrolled, and he swung by now no doubt to check on Ignis and make sure that he hadn't caused Ignis any undue duress, because Titus wanted to torment Cor, not Ignis. Titus never started any venture without assigning himself all due accountability, and Cor was keen to that but it wasn't getting Titus' ass off the hook later for barging in like this.

Ignis smiled politely, and very eagerly said, "Not at all, Captain. I'm quite happy to be here. I've been looking forward to training for a long while now. Gladio has been teaching me a few things here and there for the past few years."

Titus seemed pleased at that, or maybe more relieved, and uttered, "Very good. As a Shield should." Gladio puffed out, as usual, so proud that someone acknowledged him being a dutiful big brother. "I came by to offer the both of you the opportunity to come by Glaive headquarters for sparring sessions, once you're close to graduation. The Glaives have a different way of fighting, and it will be best for you to get a feel for combat from them. To guard the future King, it would be prudent to expand your horizons beyond these four walls."

Sounded great, because Titus was sly enough to make anyone think that that was really the reason he was here. Cor knew better, and knew that Titus was just setting more groundwork in place upon which he could continue to meddle in Cor's life.

"Yes, Captain!" Ignis and Gladio said in unison, as Cor ran a palm over the bridge of his nose and hoped a light fixture would come loose and fall atop Titus.

It didn't.

Titus, his dutiful checking in complete, turned to Cor, and said, so casually, "Well, then. I'll let you get back to it, Marshal."

"Please do," Cor grumbled, and Titus snorted as he turned to leave.

Finally. Five minutes was five minutes too long.

At the last second, however, Titus twisted halfway around, met Cor's eyes very briefly, and called, "Oh, and Ignis!"

"Yes, sir!"

A burst of terror and adrenaline.

Titus' smirk was strong, as he stared Ignis down for a long second before uttering, "Consider daggers as one of your weapons. I feel they'd suit you, and my Glaives use them, so that will give you extra insight should you take me up on my offer. Don't think you need a sword—as the Marshal will soon demonstrate, sometimes speed is better than strength. You look quick. Get those daggers and run circles around the Marshal for me. I never could catch up to him. Think you can manage?"

Cor's chest clenched up so tightly he was momentarily convinced he was actually having a heart-attack right there and then.

Ignis smiled quite happily, bowed at the waist, seemed far too flattered, and called, "Yes, Captain!"

Cor bristled up, expanded, and before the outburst could come Titus smiled and slipped out, shutting the door behind him.

That miserable, audacious, presumptuous, salacious, conniving, dirty, manipulative son of a—

As he raged away inside his head, Cor forced his face blank again, and tried to regain control of the situation. Failed, miserably, because he was so thrown off and irritated that he just scrapped his speech and instead ordered, "To the wall! Weapon selection."

Cor crankily watched, and was very unsurprised when Ignis immediately grabbed up a pair of daggers and put them away. Figured.

Titus was a piece of work.

...kinda sorta woulda liked Ignis to actually run circles around him, in all fairness.

His duty done, Ignis took to pondering his secondary weapon, and although Cor should have been observing all of the students equally, he always found his eyes seemed to end up back on Ignis before long. Couldn't stop staring at Ignis, perhaps because part of him was still very much in shock that Ignis was even here.

So out of place.

Or maybe that was only in Cor's head, because no one else even glanced twice at Ignis, Gladio aside, and to the others nothing about Ignis seemed to attract attention. Ignis always had been adept at being a wallflower.

With some low input from Gladio here and there, Ignis finally seemed to settle on the javelin.

And that was pretty much the beginning of the end for Cor.

Everyone took their places, got a feel for their weapons, tested and gauged and reconsidered, warmed up, and Cor's eyes were glued to Ignis then for all the wrong reasons as Ignis played around with the javelin.

Ignis was lithe, svelte, lean and long and very nubile, and it was easy to see right off when he set the wooden javelin into the ground and used it a stretching pole. A bend backwards, so deeply that Ignis' head almost touched the floor, and then he used the pole to settle into a very comfortable split. Cor knew, right then and there, that he was in trouble. Couldn't stop staring, couldn't tear his eyes away, and knew he was going to end up in a hell of a lot of problems if he couldn't learn to take his eyes away from Ignis. Goddammit—this was not fair.

His cheeks were tinted and his pulse was hammering, so Cor just turned his back to Ignis, crossed his arms, and ran his eyes restlessly over the wall of weapons.

Hated this.

His goddamn imagination was going to get him into a hell of a lot of trouble, because it was highly inappropriate for him to be envisioning those long legs straddling him. A horrible flash of him in his office chair, Ignis atop him—

Damn it. Something was wrong with him.

Wished that Ignis would at least have chosen the sword as his second weapon, anything other than the javelin, because seeing him use it every day as a vaulting pole and stretching pole was going to be too much to handle. Didn't want to come into Crownsguard training looking forward to a pole dance, but knew damn well that that was exactly what he was, in fact, going to be hoping for.

This was all Titus' fault. Every single bit of it.

In all his long years, Cor could say with absolute certainty that this was the most awkward and unsettling day of Crownsguard training he had ever had the misfortune of experiencing.

Ignis played around with Gladio, getting a feel for his weapons, completely unaware that every time he swung that pole beneath him to practice jumping with the weight of it, Cor died a little inside. Gladio, so protective of Ignis, kept an eye on him at all times, blissfully unaware that Cor was mentally doing to Ignis everything Gladiolus strove so hard to shield him from.

Clarus had said to Cor one day, not so long ago, 'I swear, when the first guy comes knocking on my door looking for Iris, I'm gonna castrate him. Ya know, that way the next few guys comin' 'round will at least know what'll happen to 'em if they screw up. They really have to love her, to try their hand after that.'

Cor thought of that out of nowhere, because he knew that Gladio felt the exact same way, and that was a problem because, after all, Iris and Ignis were both Gladio's little princesses, and Cor was going to be the one castrated shortly if Gladio knew about even half of the things Cor wanted to do to Ignis.

...yeah, Cor definitely didn't have his crush as under control as he thought.

When that first awful day ended, after basic weapon handling drills, Gladio clapped Ignis on the shoulder and said, "Look at you! You fit in so well!"

Had he?

Cor furrowed his brow at that, and pondered. Cor's first sensation had been that Ignis had been the only one out of place, but Gladio seemed to think the opposite true, and indeed there had been little reason to think otherwise. Maybe Cor wasn't giving Ignis a fair chance because of his own bias.

Only time would tell.

And it did, come to think. Very, very quickly. So quickly, in fact, that Cor found himself quite shocked.

The second day of Ignis' training, Cor paired him up with Gladio to run more drills, and found himself taken aback a bit when it became clear that Ignis did, indeed, have a good sense already for combat.

So Gladio really had been training him behind the scenes.

Ignis knew stances, knew defense, but was not so graceful yet with the javelin, and at the end of that day, Cor came up to them and asked, 'Ignis, with what weapon did Gladiolus train you?'

'A katana, sir,' Ignis replied, and Cor found that to his liking for obvious reasons.

He was curious, then, as to why Ignis hadn't chosen the katana as his secondary, but didn't press, for Ignis had reasons for everything he did. Why the pole? Had Ignis known somehow it would torment Cor, or had Titus been working harder behind the scenes than Cor had realized? Maybe Cor was just looking for an explanation so that his inappropriate staring could be anyone else's fault but his own.

Meh.

Cor just watched and waited, observing Ignis with far more scrutiny than he applied to any other student, and he knew that that wasn't fair, but Cor held Ignis to different standards and was looking for any sign at all of weakness. Still clung to hope that he could somehow get Ignis out of his class and try to get his own life pieced back together.

Every day, that seemed less likely, because Regis had been right, somehow, someway; Ignis was excelling, and it was astounding.

Absolutely astounding.

The second week in, when Ignis had had more practice with the javelin, he put it away, and began to use the daggers. The change was immediate. Didn't know how Titus had seen it, had noticed it, but the second those daggers were in Ignis' hands it was like something clicked upstairs. Ignis wasn't that strong, no, wasn't very large physically, but with those daggers it didn't matter. Ignis was quick, precise, smart enough to think many steps ahead, and for it was becoming rather deadly. In fact, if Cor had to pick between Gladiolus and Ignis to get into a knife fight with, it sure as hell wouldn't have been Ignis. Ignis was so quick, so sharp, so agile—a triple threat, in every sense. Excellent.

Cor began to perk up a bit, if only because Ignis looked happier than ever to be there. Ignis obviously wasn't going anywhere, and there was no point in Cor needlessly nitpicking him when doing so wasn't getting rid of him. If Ignis wasn't being forced against his will to train, then Cor could only settle down and let the kid have some fun.

Fine, alright, Regis and Titus had been right and Cor had been wrong. There.

Anyway, now Cor had slightly more incentive to keep Ignis in the Crownsguard, because he was a little wary that if he didn't Titus would swoop in and try to recruit Ignis into the Glaives, because of course Titus would do that just to rile Cor up.

Besides, there was suddenly another good reason to keep Ignis around :

Maybe it was all in Cor's head, wishful thinking or some such, but it seemed to him that every time he glanced up, Ignis jumped a little and abruptly looked away, as if he had been staring.

It gave Cor a stupid little twinge of hope.

The last thing he needed.

Cor had tried to stay so distant from Ignis, tried to remain detached and not get invested any more than he was, but then Ignis made it ever harder. He kept seeing more, learning more, and kept on falling ever harder. Ignis was beautiful, yes, and perhaps Cor had been smitten with him at first just because Ignis had appealed to him physically, but then suddenly Ignis was staying from time to time after class, and they began speaking.

Getting to know Ignis was the last thing Cor should have ever done, but like everything else, he did it anyway.

From that day, he and Ignis began to get to acquainted.

It was Cor's downfall.