Jabba's Palace
Star Wars is copyright to Disney, Lucasfilm etc. I own nothing except my OC Malia Lars
This story is the third in the Farmer's Adventure series, featuring my OC Malia Lars. I'd recommend reading the first two stories in this series, The Farmer's Adventure: A New Hope and The Farmer's Adventure: The Empire Strikes Back, first in order to get an introduction to Malia. Just a reminder to those returning from those stories, Malia is Luke's cousin and I picture her as looking like Shelley Hennig, but with blue eyes instead of brown. As of this story, she's 23 years old.
It had been a year since the tumultuous events on Bespin and in that time, the Empire had been busy working on their latest project: a new Death Star that was bigger and even more powerful than the first one. Work on this new battle station was well underway in orbit of the forest moon of Endor as the Super Star Destroyer Executor flew nearby. A Lambda-class shuttle departed from the Executor's hangar and flew towards the Death Star.
"Command station, this is shuttle Revan. Code clearance blue. We're starting our approach, deactivate the security shield." the shuttle's pilot said into the radio
"The security deflector shield will be deactivated when we have confirmation of your code transmission." a crew member aboard the Death Star answered, "Stand by." A few seconds passed, then, "You are clear to proceed."
"We're starting our approach." the pilot acknowledged, and the Revan commenced it's final approach to the Death Star. The shuttle folded it's wings up for landing and settled into land inside one of the Death Star's hangars.
A platoon of Stormtroopers entered the hangar and lined up smartly on guard as the Death Star's commander, Moff Tiaan Jerjerrod, nervously approached the Revan's boarding ramp to greet the shuttle's passenger. The ramp lowered and the unmistakable figure of Darth Vader disembarked from the shuttle. "Lord Vader, this is an unexpected pleasure. We're honoured by your presence." Jerjerrod began apprehensively
"You may dispense with the pleasantries, Commander." Vader told him briskly as he walked past him and strode across the hangar, "I'm here to put you back on schedule."
"I assure you, Lord Vader, my men are working as fast as they can." Jerjerrod said as he walked alongside Vader
"Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them."
"I tell you this station will be operational as planned." Jerjerrod insisted
Vader stopped and turned to Jerjerrod. "The Emperor does not share your optimistic appraisal of the situation." he told him bluntly
"But he asks the impossible. I need more men." Jerjerrod admitted
"Then perhaps you can tell him when he arrives." Vader retorted
Jerjerrod went as white as a sheet. "The Emperor's coming here?" he gulped
"That is correct, Commander. And he is most displeased with your apparent lack of progress."
"We shall double our efforts." Jerjerrod said nervously
"I hope so, Commander, for your sake. The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am." Vader said ominously, then he turned on his heel and strode grimly away.
~8~
R2-D2 and C-3PO made their way along a winding dirt road across the desert surface of Tatoonine. Artoo beeped something to his counterpart about their mission.
"Of course I'm worried." Threepio replied, "And you should be too. Lando Calrissian and poor Chewbacca never returned from this awful place."
Artoo whistled his confidence that they would have better luck.
"Don't be so sure." Threepio told him, "If I told you half the things I've heard about this Jabba the Hutt, you'd probably short-circuit." Presently, the two droids arrived at an intimidating-looking fortress built into a rock face and approached the front door. "Artoo, are you sure this is the right place?" Threepio asked
Artoo beeped an affirmative answer.
"We'd better knock, I suppose." Threepio said, and knocked on the heavy steel door. "There doesn't seem to be anyone in. Let's go back and tell Master Luke and Mistress Malia." He turned to leave when a hatch in the door opened suddenly and the eyepiece of a sentry droid emerged and said something in Huttese. "Goodness gracious me!" Threepio jumped. The sentry droid demanded that the droids identified themselves. "Artoo Detoowha bo Seethreepiowha." Threepio answered, "Ay tuta mishka Jabba du Hutt?" The sentry droid laughed and disappeared back into it's hatch. "I don't think they're going to let us in, Artoo." Threepio said to his counterpart, "We'd better go." He turned to leave just as the steel door slowly rose open.
Artoo beeped and made his way into the building.
"Artoo, wait!" Threepio hollered, but Artoo had already gone inside. "Oh, dear! Artoo, I really don't think we should rush into all this." Threepio said as he nervously stepped inside. Then he saw an arachnid B'omarr Monk. "Oh, Artoo!" Threepio blustered, quicking his pace, "Artoo, wait for me!"
Artoo meanwhile trundled purposefully down a dark corridor until he suddenly bumped into something. He backed up to see that he had run into an imposing Gamorrean guard who grunted at the little droid.
"Just you deliver Master Luke's message and get us out of here." Threepio said to Artoo as he caught up, then he saw the Gamorrean. "Oh, my!" he blustered as a second Gamorrean strode up to him and the door slammed shut. "Oh, no." Threepio whimpered as he realised that there was no turning back now.
Then, out of the darkness came a pale-skinned Twi'lek. This was Bib Fortuna, Jabba the Hutt's majordomo. "Day wonna wonga?" Fortuna demanded
"Oh, my." Threepio murmured, "Dee wonna wygo. We-we bring a message to your master, Jabba the Hutt."
Artoo beeped something
"And a gift." Threepio translated, then realised what Artoo had said. "Gift? What gift?" he asked his counterpart
"Ne Jabba no barta." Fortuna said, and began looking at Artoo closely. "Izzi kata o mohki?"
Artoo shook his dome and beeped something to Threepio
"He says that our instructions are to give it only to Jabba himself." Threepio translated. Fortuna stood up again, an annoyed look on his face. "I'm terribly sorry." Threepio said, "I'm afraid he's ever so stubborn about these things."
Fortuna considered for a moment. "Noht cha!" he ordered the Gamorreans, who returned to their guard posts, while Fortuna led the droids further into the fortress.
"Artoo, I have a bad feeling about this." Threepio said nervously
Fortuna led the droids to a chamber full of all sorts of shady life-forms. Amongst them, Threepio recognised the unmistakable figure of Boba Fett. Sitting prominently on a huge throne was the repulsive form of Jabba Desilijic Tiure, better known as Jabba the Hutt, the kingpin of a vast criminal empire that stretched across the cosmos. Chained to Jabba was a green-skinned Twi'lek slave girl, while an obnoxious Crumb was sat beside the throne as Jabba's pet.
"Cata notayce, my Lord." Fortuna said to his master
"Good morning." Threepio bowed
"Ohnt bat chuay dehr attat." Fortuna said to Jabba
"The message, Artoo. The message." Threepio urged Artoo
"Bu shoodah." Jabba boomed
Artoo turned his dome around and projected a hologram of Luke Skywalker. "Greetings, exalted one." Luke's message said, "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Luke Skywalker, Jedi Knight and friend of Captain Solo. I know that you are powerful, mighty Jabba, and that your anger with Solo must be equally powerful. I seek an audience with Your Greatness to bargain for Solo's life." Jabba laughed at such an idea. "With your wisdom, I'm sure that we can work out an arrangement which will be mutually beneficial and enable us to avoid any unpleasant confrontation." Luke's message continued, "As a token of my good will, I present to you a gift... these two droids."
"What did he say?!" Threepio spluttered, unable to believe what he'd just heard.
"Both are hardworking and will serve you well." Luke's message concluded
"This can't be." Threepio blustered, "Artoo, you're playing the wrong message!"
"Master, bargonay tua Knight? He's no Jedi." Fortuna said to Jabba
"There will be no bargain." Jabba announced in Huttese
"We're doomed." Threepio whimpered
"I will not give up my favourite decoration." Jabba continued, "I like Captain Solo where he is." He pointed to where the carbonised form of Han Solo was hanging on one of the walls.
"Artoo, look! Captain Solo, and he's still frozen in carbonite." Threepio said to Artoo.
~8~
"What possibly could've come over Master Luke?" Threepio moaned as he and Artoo were escorted by the Gamorreans through the palace's dank corridors, "Was it something I did? He never expressed any unhappiness with my work. Or Mistress Malia. She's never said anything about my work being unsatisfactory." He then saw a repulsive creature inside a prison cell. "Oh, how horrid!" he squirmed, backing up against another door. A tentacle promptly wrapped itself around the droid. "Ohh!" A Gamorrean smacked the tentacle, causing it to let Threepio go, then they pressed on.
The Gamorreans escorted the droids to a chamber full of droids. Threepio's attention was immediately caught by a Gonk droid being tortured, before the Gammorrean shoved him further into the room where a Supervisor droid was waiting. "Ah, good. New acquisitions." the droid said, "You are a Protocol droid, are you not?"
"I am C-3PO..." Threepio began
"Yes or no will do." the droid interrupted
"O., Well, yes.
"How many languages do you speak?"
"I am fluent in over six million forms of communication and can readily speak..."
"Splendid." the droid interrupted, "We have been without an interpreter since our master got angry with our last Protocol droid and disintegrated him."
"Disintegrated?!" Threepio stared, then he saw the remains of a Protocol droid dumped in a corner of the room.
"Guard, this Protocol droid will be useful. Fit him with a restraining bolt and take him back up to His Excellency's main audience chamber."
"Artoo, don't leave me!" Threepio wailed as he was led away.
Artoo beeped to the Supervisor droid, telling it that it would take more than the threat of disintegration to break his will.
"You're a feisty little one, but you'll soon learn some respect." the droid retorted, "I have need for you on the master's sail barge and I think you'll fill in nicely."
~8~
A party atmosphere filled Jabba's throne room as the Max Rebo Band performed Lapti Nek and Jabba's Twi'lek slave danced to the song. Jabba leered at the shapely girl as she danced. He pulled at her lead, intending to reel her in and have his way with her, but the slave decided she was having none of it and tugged back at the lead, refusing to give in to him. "Na chuba negatorie na! Na!" she shouted defiantly
Jabba was furious and slammed his slimly fist down on a button on his throne. A trapdoor beneath the slave opened and she fell through it, screaming in terror for she knew lay beneath. Jabba's entourage were most amused and they all crowded around a grate to watch the show. The girl's screams echoed up to them, before being suddenly silenced by a vicious growling noise.
Suddenly, a blaster shot sounded from somewhere, silencing the revellers. One rushed up the stairs to see what was happening, only to be shoved aside by someone, then two Ubese bounty hunters strode down the stairs, escorting a very familiar Wookie prisoner. "We have come for the bounty on this Wookie." the 1st bounty hunter said in Ubese
Threepio peered through the crowd at the newcomers. "Oh, no. Chewbacca!" he exclaimed to himself
Chewbacca gave a growl of annoyance at his apparent capture
"At last we have the mighty Chewbacca." Jabba crowed, "Kanji ta, droid."
"Yes, I am here, Your Worshipfulness." Threepio said as he shuffled obediently forward
Jabba said something to Threepio in Huttese.
"The illustrious Jabba bids you both welcome." Threepio said to the bounty hunters, "And will gladly pay you the reward of 25,000."
"We want 50,000. No less." the 1st bounty hunter growled
"50,000,no less." Threepio told Jabba, who roared in rage and shoved Threepio over. "What... what did I say?" Threepio blustered as he picked himself up
Jabba barked some commands in Huttese.
"The mighty Jabba asks why he must pay 50,000." Threepio translated to the bounty hunters
"Because if he doesn't, they'll be picking his smelly hide out of every corner of this room!" the 2nd bounty hunter retorted, producing a small spherical device with a timer on it.
"Because he's holding a thermal detonator!" Threepio cried, and several of Jabba's minions all hit the deck, while Fett aimed his rifle at the bounty hunters.
Jabba was amused at the threat and gave a throaty laugh. "These bounty hunters are my kind of scum." he said, "Fearless and inventive." He then said something to Threepio.
"Jabba offers the sum of 35." Threepio said to the bounty hunters, "And I do suggest you take it."
The 1st bounty hunter said something in Ubese to the 2nd one, who then disarmed their thermal detonator.
"They agree!" Threepio sighed in relief, and Jabba's party resumed.
Two Gamorrean guards came over and led Chewbacca away, the Wookie howling and struggling in vain. Fett nodded at the two bounty hunters, impressed at their guts.
As the Gamorrean guards led Chewbacca away, they pased a Human guard on duty. After the Gamorreans had passed, the guard lowered the visor on his helmet to reveal the face of Lando Calrissian.
~8~
Night had soon fallen on Tatooine and Jabba's palace was silent, with Jabba and his minions having all retired for the night. Two figures crept into the deserted throne room. It was the two Ubese bounty hunters. They snuck past the aftermath of the party and approached the carbonite block on the wall. The 2nd bounty hunter then stood guard while the 1st one operated a control panel on the wall and the carbonite block was lowered to the floor, making a loud thud as it made contact with the concrete. "Quiet!" the 2nd bounty hunter growled in a harsh, robotic voice.
The 1st bounty hunter made a signal of acknowledgment then operated some controls on the side of the carbonite block to start the thawing process. Han's shell glowed red and the carbonite began to melt away until Han was completely clear and he fell forward, the two bounty hunters managing to catch him before he hit the floor. Han's eyes snapped open and he shivered as he reoriented himself. "Just relax for a moment." the 1st bounty hunter told him, "You're free of the carbonite. You have hibernation sickness."
Han touched his face, checking to see if his eyelids were open. "I can't see." he spoke up, his pupils contracted.
"Your eyesight will return in time." the 1st bounty hunter told him
"Where am I?" Han asked
"Jabba's palace."
Han then touched the bounty's helmet. "Who are you?" he asked
The 1st bounty hunter then removed their helmet to reveal themselves as Princess Leia Organa. "Someone who loves you." she said
"Leia!" Han cried, and Leia threw herself at him, kissing him passionately.
"Aw, look at you two." the 2nd bounty hunter said, then removed their helmet to reveal themselves as Malia Lars. "Now that's been a long time coming." she said
"Malia!" Han gasped
"Hey, Han." Malia smiled, "It's been a while."
"Come on, we've gotta get you outta here." Leia said to Han as she and Malia helped him to stand.
Suddenly, a throaty laugh sounded from somewhere. "What's that?" Malia asked no one in particular
"I know that laugh." Han said, and a curtain behind them opened to reveal Jabba and some of his cronies, who all laughed at the trio. "Hey, Jabba..." Han said as the women turned him around to face Jabba, "Look, Jabba... I was just on my way to pay you back, but I got a little side-tracked. It's not my fault."
"I don't think that's gonna work, Han." Malia said quietly
And indeed it didn't. "It's too late for that, Solo." Jabba boomed, "You may have been a good smuggler... but now you're Bantha fodder."
"Look..." Han began
"Take him away!" Jabba ordered, and two of his guards grabbed Han and began to drag him away.
"Jabba, I'll pay ya triple." Han tried in vain, "You're throwin' away a fortune here. Don't be a fool!"
Lando then approached Leia and Malia, ready to take them away so they could confer in private, but Jabba had other ideas. "Bring them to me." he ordered, so Lando had no choice but to bring the two women over to Jabba.
"We have powerful friends." Leia said defiantly, "You're gonna regret this."
"I'm sure." Jabba laughed
"Just wait till my cousin gets here." Malia snarled, "When he does, you're dead, Jabba. D'ya hear me? Dead!"
Jabba just laughed and began to lick the young woman's face, causing her to squirm in disgust.
"Oh, I can't bear to watch." Threepio said, turning away.
~8~
Han was roughly shoved into a prison cell. As he blindly felt around the walls, he suddenly heard a familiar growling sound. "Chewie, is that you?" he asked
Chewbacca growled in delight at the sight of his old friend and launched himself at Han, giving him a bone-crushing hug.
"Ch-Chewie! I can't see, pal. What's goin' on?" Han asked
Chewbacca howled an answer, informing Han that Luke had a master plan to rescue Han.
"Luke? Luke's crazy. Can't even take of himself, much less rescue anybody." Han said pessimistically
Chewbacca informed Han that Luke had grown considerably in the last 12 months and was now quite a force to be reckoned with.
"A Jedi Knight?" Han scoffed, "I'm out of it for a little while, everybody gets delusions of grandeur."
Chewbacca just resumed hugging his friend.
"I'm alright, pal." Han reassured him.
Author's notes: And so we kick off Return of the Jedi. I'm currently self-isolating with covid, which means I've got the time to do a spot of writing, so I decided to make a start on this film. Regarding the name of Vader's shuttle, it's a nod to Darth Revan from Knights of the Old Republic. After a discussion with Stargate Time Traveller, we felt that it was a nice Easter egg that foreshadows Vader's arc in this film. Just to warn in advance, Malia may be more of a side character in this story, as ROTJ is pretty much Luke and Vader's story first and foremost. So, hope you like this first chapter and see ya next time!