Location: Home.

Nuzleaf returned this morning!

I was so excited to see him, I kind of…tackled him. I'm not joking, I ran over to him too quickly to stop myself properly and accidentally ran straight into him. He landed on his back on the floor and was uh…not amused by my greeting, but he said he missed me too.

I told him school was going well and that I was making all kinds of friends. He asked if I remembered anything or if I'd seen the Beheeyem, both of which I said no to. He suggested we keep "pluggin' along like this" until something jogged my memory. Seemed a little aimless, but I had no objections.

Apparently, Nuzleaf heard about the argument Lyra and I had from Carracosta. A hot wash of embarrassment fell over me and I...couldn't look at him. Much as I try to act my real age (whatever it is), the fact remained that I had a freaking playground argument with...a kid. Now an adult I trust is pulling me aside to discuss it, and...

Ugh, it's shameful, okay!?

Everyone has moments where they're ashamed of something stupid and childish that they did, and in my case I feel ashamed at having argued with Lyra and having to discuss it with Nuzleaf. Lyra was in the wrong! But if that's really true, then why do I feel so embarrassed talking about it?

Because it shouldn't have happened at all. I'm much older than her (I think), and I should've known better than to argue with her. I should've been the bigger Pokemon and walked away. I'm supposed to be the mature one. I'm supposed to know better. I'm supposed to be better.

Nuzleaf asked me to recount the argument using my own words so he can hear my side of it. I...couldn't do it. I tried talking, but nothing came out and my mouth clamped shut. I was too embarrassed and ashamed of myself. We were supposed to be solving the mysteries of my past, not...not having this stupid one-sided talk about how foolish I was to argue with Lyra.

Jeez, it really was a pitiful display I put on. Grown-ass human-turned-Pokemon too ashamed to act her age and have a civil conversation with the other adult in the room. I swear I'm not a child!

Eventually, he gave up trying to get an answer out of me and settled for patting me on the head.

"Ain't no need to get worked up over it," he'd said. "I'm sure it's not as big a deal as yer head's makin' it."

Yeah...that's true. I have a habit of catastrophizing things. When I finally managed talk, I told him I wasn't really in the mood to talk about it.

Although he didn't fully understand what happened, Nuzleaf told me that our emotions don't control us for forever and once we're back in control it's up to us to decide if we want to repair the damage we did when we weren't. He suggested that I try talking to Lyra about what happened and hopefully we can fix what we both damaged.

I like the idea, but being the one reaching out to Lyra makes me feel nervous. Would I be admitting I was in the wrong if I initiated the repair process? Because I wasn't!

Ugh, at this point what the hell does that even matter!? Lyra and I aren't talking and she's all miserable and alone...it SUCKS! This whole situation is just a load of Trubbish! I'm supposed to be the bigger Pokemon, remember? The one who's more mature, who knows better and is better? So, I should be the one who takes the first step to make things right.

All's I gotta do is find her first and talk to her in private. Easy, right?

Location: Serene Village Classroom

Farfetch'd gave me permission to write during class since it "helps the creative juices flow" as he'd put it and MAN I have some stuff to write about.

First thing's first, Carracosta was talking to some of the village Pokémon about how it's honey season. Some Combees and Beedrills are going about making honey in Nectar Meadow, and it'd be wise if we avoided them at this time given how they're on edge from being busy. A toddler Pokémon named Budew seemed curious, but Carracosta made her promise she wouldn't go to the meadow. Although Nectar Meadow honey sounds delicious, I wasn't foolish enough to take off for that place. I'm not Lyra, after all.

Speaking of, talking to her in private proved not easy at ALL. I didn't get a chance to talk to her before arriving at class, but once I got here…well, after settling in, Pancham started asking questions about where I came from. Lyra was curious too, but she was trying not to look at me. She just kinda talked about me with the others.

Conversations got going about if I was from Lively Town, some city within this continent. When Espurr brought up the point that Nuzleaf wasn't really the city type of Pokémon, they wanted a straight answer from me.

I…man, I did NOT think this through. I couldn't think of a convincing lie, so I just decided to try being honest. I told them I was a human that was turned into a Pokémon and sent to this world, purposefully leaving out the stuff about the Beheeyem – no need to make the others panic over that.

Of course, they were all shocked. And after the shock, smart-ass Pancham had to open his mouth. He accused me of lying, saying humans only existed in kids' stories. Then Deerling and Espurr chipped in, and I won't lie, it kinda hurt my feelings. Deerling saying that it was awful hard to believe...that hurt. And Espurr saying she didn't believe me either? That really, really hurt.

Was it so hard to believe, though? Here I am, a freaking human, talking to a bunch of animals. LIVING with an animal, going to school with animals, getting upset over an argument I had with an animal…hating the shit out of the schoolyard bully that is, wouldn't you know it, an animal.

But, no. The potential of me being a human? That's ridiculous. Nevermind the fact that everything up to this point has been nothing short of ridiculous in my eyes. Guess my origins must make a hella lot less sense to them than their entire WORLD does to me.

And Pancham has the nerve to act like some bigshot know-it-all? Get your head out of your ass, you stupid kid.

Luckily…Principal Simipour came in and sort of saved me. He stated that just because my story sounds unbelievable that doesn't automatically make it a lie. Strange things can happen in this world, and we should all keep our minds open to the possibility of the unknown becoming reality.

I…I felt much, much better after that. It felt like the tension was being taken away, and the entire room wasn't against me anymore. However, as Farfetch'd started reading one of those kids' stories to us, I felt like some of the others were still staring at me.

Maybe I shouldn't have picked one of the chairs in the front of the room…

Location: Home (evening)

The last part of school was…interesting, to say the least. Watchog was in charge again, and he taught us how to use an Alliance, which consisted of 3 Pokémon using their moves against 1 Pokémon at the same time. The lesson consisted of Watchog getting attacked by Magnezone, Magneton, and Magnemite (the local sheriffs) followed by Watchog getting attacked by Pancham, Shelmet, and Espurr.

It was a little amusing to watch, but Watchog had to be hauled off to the infirmary afterwards. He underestimated the strength of their moves, and said they were surprisingly strong even if they're just kids.

I also wound up walking home alone again. I tried going over to Carracosta's to talk to Lyra, but neither of them were home, so I left.

Nuzleaf suggested I tried giving Lyra some time to think about stuff. Sometimes a Pokémon needs alone time to sort out their feelings, especially after an upsetting fight with someone close. I hope he's right and that's all this is.

I didn't tell him I revealed my human origins to the kids at school. I get the feeling he wouldn't like it. Honestly, I wish I could talk to Lyra about it. Keeping it all in my own head can be a little much at times.

Nuzleaf had said this morning that we should keep plugging along like we've been, but I don't think he realizes just how crazy this has been for me. I've been just going along with things this entire time, taking the strangeness as it comes, but nobody's ever asked for my input on my situation.

Much as I enjoy being here, what of my family back home? Do I have parents like Nuzleaf who miss me? Do I have friends like Lyra who I argued with and never had the chance to make up with?

I've been asking who I was when I guess I should've been asking who did I leave behind by coming here? With every day I spend here, is there someone out there looking for me in another world?

Hm...this is all a bit much. I wish I had a way of knowing for sure. Wish I had a way of discovering the answer instead of just "pluggin' along" like I've been. I won't lie, I feel like there's something I should be doing...but I have no idea what that is. And because I'm not doing it, I feel a vague sense of doom...

Oh Arceus, I'd better not be having a midlife crisis!