Dear Diary,
Okay, I know we haven't spoken in a while but I have A LOT to tell you. It's the second week of October and I'm in my senior year of high school. But this year has been like never before ever since two new teachers were hired at school. Damon and Stefan Salvatore. Both drop-dead gorgeous. And it just so happens that me and Elena might be in love with them. Well… Elena more or less wants to start a sordid affair with Damon, I'm not so sure if she loves him. But when it comes to Stefan… I don't know, I've just never felt like this before and it's driving me insane. He's 10 years older than me! But it doesn't feel like that when we're together… Anyways why I'm writing now is to keep track of exactly what crazy shit has been happening. Like it's been straight out of a movie. I'll get to me and Stefan later because it's not as juicy as what just happened between Mr. S and Elena. THEY FUCKING HOOKED UP.
So we had this plan to make them jealous by kissing Tyler and Matt in front of them (side note, I'm not sure what's gonna end up happening with them) and it fucking WORKED. That same day Damon was so worked up after seeing Elena kiss Matt that that day in tutoring he made a move on her. At lunch, me and Elena went to eat in her car and she told me everything! I couldn't fucking believe what I was hearing. While they were sitting apparently it just got all quiet all of a sudden and he just looked down at her staring… then leaned in and kissed her! But they took it to a whole other level, she straddled him in his desk chair and was ready to drop down to her knees or be fucked right on the desk. But he said it was too dangerous and that they couldn't do it at school but that they'd find a way… WHAT THE FUCK. Am I right? They exchanged numbers and have been talking all week, waiting and planning when she can go to his house or something.
So while that's going on Stefan and I are still in limbo… Oh yeah, we kissed but that's a story to catalog on a whole other page. It feels like so much more with Stefan and me but he told me it was wrong and nothing could come from it. But I know he wants me in some capacity. I see the fight in his eyes. The longing. It's all there. I just don't know how to push through, I don't even know what I want from all this. But I'll make sure to keep you updated. Till next time.
It was Friday night, Elena and Caroline were at Caroline's place getting ready for that night's game that started at 7 pm. They had already eaten dinner, now they were picking out their outfits. "Damon says that he and Stefan are going to be there tonight," Elena said, smiling up at Caroline. "Dude I still can't believe like…" Caroline started but couldn't finish. Her friend just nodded, "I know." "Oh, fuck don't Matt and Tyler want us to wear their jerseys tonight?" Caroline questioned which made Elena snicker, "Whatever, let's just do it so they don't whine about it, plus I bet it'll drive Stefan mad seeing you as Tyler's girl." Caroline smiled, "We can't go on with this charade forever."
Elena rolled her eyes, "I know but hey they're hot and they're our friends, we can stop being more than friends whenever we want. We're in control." Caroline just gave her friend a look, Elena continued, "But hey it's nice being with the hottest and most popular guys in school, all the girls hate us. Meanwhile, we have them and older men who just so happen to be our super hot teachers." She smiled wickedly and Caroline laughed, "You totally have Damon, I'm still wherever I'm at with Stefan." Elena got off her bed and walked over to her friend, putting her arm on her shoulder. "Stefan's just in his head, he'll come around eventually. Even I can tell he's crazy about you." Caroline said nothing but hoped that what Elena had said was true.
Elena and Caroline arrived at the game. In Elena's car before walking in they each had an airplane bottle of vodka. They took their shot then and couldn't stop giggling as they walked inside, eager to see how cute Stefan and Damon looked. When they walked in all the boys were already on the field, Bonnie was at the table at the entrance of the bleachers charging people who weren't students. They walked past her, "Should we sit in the student section?" Caroline asked. Elena gave her a look, "Fuck that let's sit close to you know who." Caroline smiled at her friend, when they got in front of the bleachers they started searching for the Salvatores. After walking past one set of bleachers, Caroline saw them, sitting almost directly under the announcer booth. She and Stefan made eye contact, it lingered for a moment before she looked away towards Elena and whispered to her.
Elena looked up at the brothers, when she and Damon's eyes met he just smirked at her. She did the same then the girls found their seats. They decided to sit where they could see the brothers but not make it obvious that they were staring. "Elena this is killing me, all I want is to be with him," Caroline whispered while staring at the field. Elena was smiling at her phone–she and Damon obviously texting. It made Caroline roll her eyes, "Can you not rub it in while I'm dying over here?" She looked at Elena then inadvertently towards Stefan.
They made brief eye contact before she broke it. She took a couple of deep breaths and Elena looked over towards her, "I swear it's gonna happen just please trust my intuition," she told Caroline, trying to make her feel better. Caroline just looked at her friend and pouted, "How about we get super wasted at the post-game party? Just shit talk about this whole crazy situation," Elena said which put a smile on Caroline's face. "That does sound amazing…I just hate getting drunk with the guys around ever since we started becoming 'things' with them Tyler is always up on me and I don't wanna fuck him," Caroline explained. Elena nodded, "I know how you feel, ever since shit got real with me and you know who I don't even want to be touched by Matt… but they are a good cover."
The girls just nodded, "So after the game, Tyler will take me and you'll give Matt a ride, we'll meet there?" Elena nodded while looking at her phone, "Sounds like a plan but who knows where I'll end up after," she looked at her best friend and winked. Caroline hit her arm, "You can't be serious!" Elena just laughed, "I'll for sure need some liquid courage but I for sure want to have sex with him. Like just to get the anticipation out of the way." Caroline's eyes just went wide as she stared at her best friend–this craziness was all too real. "But seriously if I do end up going to his place, will you be okay staying at Tyler's or catching a ride home?" Caroline just nodded, "Yes girl I can figure it out, you just have to keep me updated." The game ended and the girls waited for the boys outside the locker room. Once all four were reunited, Caroline and Tyler started walking to his car and their counterparts went in the other direction. He and Caroline were walking alongside the building to the priority parking lot.
"You guys did great," Caroline said, making small talk which made his hand slink around her waist. He gave her a kiss behind her ear, "How are you gonna congratulate me?" She just laughed and pushed him away lightly, "You're hilarious," she said and continued walking. But then he stopped and turned towards her, "I'm serious Caroline, what's going on with us? Like are we a thing are we not? We can't just be friends who kiss each other. I'm trying to be more…" he said and put both of his hands on her waist.
They backed into the wall and started kissing. She put her hands on his chest and pushed him away, "Tyler you know I like you I'm just not ready for all that and if that's what you want…" she trailed off looking towards the parking lot. They were so close. This made him angry and he stepped away from her, "Come on Caroline we've been friends forever like who else are you gonna lose it to?" She just scoffed and looked at him incredulously, who the fuck did he think he was?
She went to walk away and he grabbed her arm and pulled her back forcefully, "Ow that fucking hurts!" She yelled as he pulled her close to him. Before he could speak they were interrupted, "Everything okay you two?" Caroline looked over towards the parking lot and saw Stefan standing there. Relief and anxiety flooded her at the same time. Tyler's grip lessened and Caroline looked towards him with pleading eyes. "Oh yeah Mr. Salvatore we were just talking," that response made Stefan squint his eyes. Caroline freed herself from his grip. "You okay, Caroline?" She just shook her head and started walking over to him. "What the fuck Caroline?" Tyler said which made Stefan step forward, "Watch your mouth Lockwood or you'll end up in the principal's office every morning this week. Caroline obviously wants some space from you so how about you walk away and call it a night?"
Tyler just looked over at her, "Really, Care?" She just crossed her arms, standing close to Stefan. "I assume you're not coming to the party then? How are you even gonna get home?" "I'll make sure she's okay, now go." Tyler walked up to her but she stood her ground, "See what this righteous virgin act will get you, we both know how you really are," he spat before walking to his car. She was livid–how dare he. She turned around, "Oh fuck you Tyler!" She yelled which made Stefan put his arm out in front of her. "He's not worth it," he said, which made her shake her head. She sent a quick text to Elena "Tyler was being a fucking asshole…I'll keep you updated but I think I'm getting a ride with Stefan. Just gonna go home." She sighed and looked up at Stefan. Now realizing they were alone together. "I'm sorry about that, he was just being insanely rude I shouldn't have…" Stefan cut her off. "It's okay, I saw the way he grabbed you. That wasn't right." She just looked up at him and nodded.
Even in this shitty parking lot lighting he still looked gorgeous. She looked away from him, "Well I can get an uber so thanks for helping me out." Stefan furrowed his brow, she seemed so used to this disrespect that it saddened him. "I'm gonna make sure you get home safe, as in I'll drive you," he explained. She bit her lip, "If you're okay with that?" She just nodded and wrapped her arms around herself. They started walking towards his car, she instantly spotted it. Ugh, sex on wheels. She thought. But then an overwhelming sadness came over her. He's never gonna want me the way I want him. I just need to start getting over this. She thought as they got to his car. He instinctively opened her door. She got in and quietly sat down and began staring despondently out the window. She wanted to cry. How dare Tyler touch her like that… just like her father did. And how come Elena and Damon could be together but not her and Stefan? Nothing was fair.