When the Howling Commandos penetrated the fortified walls, they found very little resistance. A few soldiers here and there, but no major adversaries.
"I don't like this." Dugan whispered as they cleared an abandoned building. "Feels like a trap."
"Can't be." Logan said. "If this was a trap, they wouldn't have left that pot of stew on." He said, pointing to the bubbling-over pot of something vile. "And they weren't running from us. They pushed too hard at the wall. They were running toward something."
"What might it be they fear more than us?" Diana mused.
"Maybe an alien invasion?" Morita asked rhetorically.
Steve thought back to the comics he used to draw and read back home. "Good god, I hope not."
Their speculation was interrupted by a booming laugh and a thunderous crash.
"Ho ho!" A jolly laugh sounded out. "You can surely do better than that, no?"
The Commandos rushed outside to see the source of the voice. It was a man dressed in a red and white armored jumpsuit, with a white crest upon his head, white star on his chest, white gloves and boots upon his hands and feet. He had a jaw like a lantern, and a voice that sent jolly echoes throughout the land.
"Great. Santa Claus is real, and he's Russian." Dugan said.
The man was surrounded by infantry and tanks. The men had not readied their guns, but the tanks fired at the man as he hopped nimbly ahead of their shells. He jumped at one of the tanks and peppered the front end with punches, rending the metal to shreds.
The Commandos' jaws dropped simultaneously, even Diana's.
The man pulled the front of the tank apart, and plucker the gunner and driver from their seats. "Take a seat with your brothers." He commanded. "Papa Aleksey is putting you in time-out!" Then, he tossed the two into a gaggle of soldiers, knocking the lot over like bowling pins.
Another tank pulled its biggest gun right up to his face, and primed to fire. Aleksey brought his left arm up and backhanded the cannon before it could loose its payload, and sent it careening into a nearby building.
"Naughty, naughty, sneaking up on me like that." He said, wagging his finger. "I cannot abide that." He hauled the tank up on his shoulder almost effortlessly, and threw it backwards into another tank.
Aleksey dusted his gloves off, and turned to the Howling Commandos with a shining smile. "Well? Are you simply going to stand there?"
Once the shock subsided, the Howling Commandos charged into battle, and those Germans who could flee the fight did. The others either fought vainly, or surrendered.
When the brief fight was over, and the city was secured, the red-clad man made to introduce himself to the Howling Commandos inside one of the captured command buildings.
"Captain America, I am glad to finally meet you!" Aleksey said, extending his hand in greeting. "My name is Aleksey Lebedev, but my countrymen have come to know me as The Red Guardian!"
"We weren't expecting any support from the Soviets on this mission." Steve said, cautiously shaking the man's hand.
"Ah, Mother Russia would like to keep a few of her secrets. Nevertheless, I wish that we can be good friends!"
"Are you here by yourself?" Diana asked.
"My dear, forgive Aleksey, I am taken aback. Such a lovely Greek woman such as yourself, I never expect to hear such perfect Russian!" Aleksey exclaimed. "Yes, I come with complement of Red Army, but they take too long, so I forge ahead. Much more fun this way."
"You'll have to forgive our suspicions," Diana said, surreptitiously dropping her lasso on Aleksey's feet. "The last time we had to work with the Russians, they weren't very cooperative."
"My dear, I do not wish to be a barrier to anything you might do. No matter the differences of our nations, I stand for the same things as Captain Rogers." He said, clapping Steve on the shoulder. "Truth, justice, and freedom for all! Life and liberty unimpeded by madmen such as Hitler and Mussolini!"
"Hell, that's good enough for me!" Dugan said with a laugh. "Waddya say we have a drink to new friends?"
"Here." Logan said as he pulled a bottle from a commanding officer's liquor cabinet. "Pálinka. Hungarian brandy. Strong stuff."
"Oh, my new hairy friend, it cannot be stronger than Tsaritsyn vodka!"
The rest of the night was spent rounding up stragglers, freeing prisoners, and making merry. Aleksey drank most of the Commandos under the table, but Logan, Steve and Diana were still standing proud.
"Captain," Aleksey said, rolling up his sleeve. "I challenge you to an arm-wrestling competition!" He placed one elbow on a table, and flexed his hand.
"I'll do it." Diana said, sitting down without a moment of hesitation.
"My dear, are you sure?"
"Positive." Diana planted her elbow on the table. Aleksey was taller than her, taller than Steve, and bulkier than both. But Diana smirked as she clasped his hand.
"Alright. I go easy on you at first, since you are so beautiful. It would not do to ruin-" Aleksey's jovial ribbing was cut off when he couldn't budge Diana's hand a single millimeter.
"Is there some sort of trickery at play?" He asked as he put more force in, and still could not budge her arm.
"Not at all." She said with a grin. She twitched her arm, and sent Aleksey's arm through the table, and him sideways into the ground.
He looked shocked at first, then he bounced back to his feet with a jovial grin upon his face. "My dear, that was amazing! Might I inquire if you are romantically involved with anyone?"
"Yes." She responded, with a flick of her eyes at Steve. Steve felt his heart leap what felt like a thousand, no, a million feet in the air.
"Ah, he is a lucky man. Do you have any sisters or cousins?"
"If I'm not mistaken, she's got quite a few." Logan said as he knocked another glass of brandy back. "Her grandpa got around, to say the least."
Diana shot an alarmed glance at Logan.
"Met one of your uncles way back when." He said. "Ol' Zeus couldn't keep it in his pants." He said with a cackle as he poured another glass.