Chapter 5:
Anne walked down the stairs, feeling as if she were gliding down, each step giving her more confidence as the mistress of this celestial home.
"Anne" said Mr. Darcy warmly, when she walked into the room, "You look lovely" he said, with the same tone that he would often compliment Georgiana, but Anne smiled graciously nonetheless. "Do you remember Miss Elizabeth Bennet?" he said to her, now turning her attention to Miss Elizabeth. Anne smiled weakly.
"Yes" said Anne, she paused for a moment, thinking of how to phrase her remark. She second guessed her words and actions so often that she sometimes looked like a fool, when in reality, she just needed practice and confidence to speak her own thoughts, instead of nodding and agreeing to everything her mother said. This internal struggle was not seen by anyone, as Miss Elizabeth quickly remarked:
"It is lovely to see you again, Mrs. Darcy" she said genuinely. Elizabeth looks lovely, thought Anne bitterly, she is just so beautiful. She tried to mask her emotions and smiled sweetly, specially when Mr. Darcy offered Anne his arm to bring her into the dining room and helped her with her chair.
"I thank you" said Anne sweetly to Mr. Darcy, who smiled in return like a loving brother and sat besides his wife.
The conversation was lively—Miss Elizabeth knew how to entertain. Anne sat there quietly, taking small bites of the delicacies served and listening to the conversation attentively. As someone who had not developed the skill to converse easily, she was looking at Elizabeth as a teacher, wanting to learn how to express herself so clearly and easily. After thirty minutes, she was exhausted from the so called lesson.
"Are you feeling unwell?" asked Mr. Darcy, turning to his wife.
"I am a bit tired" said Anne, giving him another weak smile. "I believe I shall retire."
"Goodnight, Anne" said Mr. Darcy, standing up and watching his wife leave the dining room. He felt an uneasiness that he could not decipher. In his mind, he had not done any wrong by Anne. He had married her with very clear intentions, accepted by her mother and he supposed, her, but now that he thought about it, it was possible his Aunt did not tell Anne what they had spoke about in private, the details of the marriage contract, or anything else for that matter. He wondered, had Anne expected something else? Because it was something he was never willing to give her but he had never intended to hurt her—she was his dear cousin, that was all.
Mrs. Darcy had left before dessert was brought out. The footmen brought out a chocolate cake and Mr. Darcy decided to have a shot of whiskey with the ladies during dessert, instead of in his study, alone.
"And when do you plan on leaving?" asked Georgiana, now more comfortable conversing with Miss Elizabeth.
"I am thinking the day after tomorrow, if that is possible" said Elizabeth, now looking at Mr. Darcy.
"Of course" he said curtly, his mind still thinking about Anne.
"I shall retire" said Georgiana, hiding a yawn with her gloved hand. "Shall we stroll in the morning after breaking our fast?"
"That would be lovely" said Elizabeth warmly. "I believe I shall also retire."
"Miss Elizabeth—I would like to have a word, before you go" said Mr. Darcy.
Lizzy simply nodded. Georgiana left the room and Elizabeth stayed sitting there, waiting for Mr. Darcy to sit back down.
"I have been thinking...would you want to be Georgiana's companion? I could set you up in London, I would stay here with Anne" he said, his attention now on Elizabeth. He had thought about this and he felt this was the best recourse. He, of course, did not come to that conclusion based on logic.
"And what would Mrs. Darcy think of that?" asked Elizabeth, one eyebrow raised.
"Anne will understand" he said, knowing full well that she would not. "Her health is not..." he began, cleared his throat and then continued, "She will understand."
"Mr. Darcy while I was so thankful, I cannot accept you offer. I came here in desperation and what I want and what my family needs is more respectability, not more scandal" she said, her expression solemn but determined. "It would seem inconceivable that while society has slammed their doors at the Bennets, Mr. Darcy of Pemberley would welcome me into his home—surely you must know the scandal that would bring."
He looked at her not convinced.
"We almost...in the garden!" she whispered, making him laugh.
"Kissed?" asked Mr. Darcy, teasing her.
"Do not say it with a grin! We almost kissed in your garden while your wife watched from her window!" said Elizabeth.
"Anne and I are not a normal married couple" answered Mr. Darcy, not excusing his behavior, for he knew that he would never do that again. He was drawn to Elizabeth and perhaps she was right, it would only lead to more scandal.
"I know that" she said with a sigh, "Everyone knows that but it matters not. I would like to go back to Longbourn, I do not believe it would be good for me nor you to stay here."
"You are right—I am afraid I want you to stay, even with just Georgiana, for selfish reasons. Having you here...with Georgiana...it has been..." he began but stopped himself, out of respect for his wife, "Would you wait for me, Miss Elizabeth?"
"Mr. Darcy" said Elizabeth, a sad look in her eyes.
"I have written to your father" he said more formally, clearing this throat. I know of a gentleman in Scotland who needs a wife. He is not wealthy, but he will be able to provide for Miss Lydia and he would give her the respectability of being married."
Lizzy did not know what to say. Her eyes started watering—could this be true?
"It will be a respectable marriage. I have already written to your father, I hope you do not mind the liberty but I would like this to be attended to" he said.
"Why?" asked Elizabeth, overcome with emotion.
"Because I want to see you happy, Miss Elizabeth. I may not be able to at the moment wish for anything else, but even if not with me, I would like to see you build a life and be happy"
"I thank you" said Elizabeth, holding back tears. "I should go..." she said, bowing lightly and exiting the dining room.
Mr. Darcy nodded and watched her go, knowing full well that she needed to return to Longbourn and yet saddened that she would only be in his home for one more day.
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If you don't like authors notes...you can just skip this :)
first of all, thank you to everyone for all the wonderful and thoughtful reviews! the amount of research some of you did-WOW! I thank you :)
I know this chapter is short but I wanted to post and I havent finished the rest yet, im writing as I go and im at a bit of a crossroads, waiting for the characters to tell me where they want to go...
As always, appreciate and love to hear your thoughts :)
xoxo,
PP