Disclaimer: I do not own Storm Hawks or Slayers.

Dumb Nicknames

"Lina…"

"Ne, ugh…"

"Liiina…"

"No, mommy, I don't want to play Luna's death game…"

"… Hey, Lina, I found a restaurant with pre-made Dragon Cuisine!"

"MINE!" yelled a waking-Lina as she looked around for that specific restaurant. Only, she didn't find the restaurant. In fact, she didn't find any place that had food or to be more specific, no buildings at all. The two were still stuck on that landmass with no way of getting down. They did try once, but the bottom was full of lava and big serpents that were scared of her.

The sorceress then looked over at her partner with a glare that could kill. "Gourry… Exactly why did you wake me up from my beauty sleep?"

"Well…" Gourry said while rubbing the back of his head, "You know those people you blew up yesterday?" She nodded, not wanting to remember how she lost that ton of treasure. "Well… I think they brought friends this time."

She blinked and looked around to see that her partner was right for once. The people that had taken her free loot were back with a lot more soldiers than before. This time, they were surrounding the two, armed to the teeth with crystal staves. Lina didn't take much into the situation other than the fact that this meant war.

Breaking from the ranks of the soldiers, the same guy who had denied the treasure stepped forward, glaring with the intensity of a thousand suns. This time, he was covered in bandages from her last attack. And by the look on his face, he wasn't too thrilled about receiving it.

"Alright, you demonic fiend girl! You may have caught me off guard last time. But now, I have you surrounded with an army. So, you better surrender yourself now or else we'll do it the hard way!" Lina just stared with a non-amused face at him.

"Look, if you're blaming me for destroying your ship and the treasure in the first place, it's your damn fault for taking it from me in the first place!" she yelled back, raising her fist in the air. Though it didn't calm down the guy who was in charge of this confrontation, some of the Talons who had been there started to murmur among themselves.

"…It's kinda true, sir," a brave grunt said in a low voice. The man turned to glare at him, causing the others to be scared stiff. This was definitely a side of him that they have never seen before.

"Would you just point your staves at them and fire when I say so!" The Talons quickly went back to the same position as before. This time, Lina was prepared for any attack they through at her. However, Gourry was confused by who was attacking Lina.

"Hey, Lina, who's that guy?" the blonde said, as he pointed up at the leader. The tension suddenly broke as everyone went dumbfounded. They were going into a big epic battle, and he was worried about who was challenging them?

Lina was about to give Gourry a beating before she realized that too. "Oh yea, he really didn't give out his name if I remember correctly." She then turned to the guy and called, "Hey! Can you tell us who you are before we get this going?" The man growled before coming up with a brilliant idea. If he was going to be some big hotshot, he might as well test out his "name" to get publicity.

"Well, if you must know, I am one of the top commanders of the Cyclonian fleet. I have already conquered a few terras around here and have defeated many sky knights. I run the strictest shift and I am an all-round bad guy!" Both sorceress and swordsman sweatdropped at the long introduction. "I am-"

"Commander Chicken Feathers."

Commander Chicken Feathers froze as laughter sounded throughout the group. His own presentation foiled by his own men. He turned to them and complained, "Hey! Why did you do that? I had my new nickname up and ready!"

"Well, that is your official "name". After all, Ravess did give it to you after your fight with those chickens." Chicken Feathers fumed, remembering the situation. And as much as he would like to forget about it, said-situation still came up.

"Well, I am telling you not call me by that until I have a better one! Besides, you know what my real name is. It's-!"

"DIL BRAND!"

Before he could finish, the entire battalion was blown up by Lina's spell, leaving nothing more than burnt up bodies. Once brushing her hands, she left with Gourry following after her. And like always, he felt a little empathy for the bad guys. "Hey, don't you think it's a little mean to blow him up without learning his real name?"

"Gourry, at this point, I don't care what he wants to be called. Nothing can save him from being called "Chicken Feathers"."

And that was another failed attempt by the Talons to defeat Lina Inverse.

Author's Notes:

Yea, think of this as a prelude to an upcoming joke in the next chapter. It's going to include more torture on Chicken Feathers. I can't believe how easy he is as a insult target.

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