Disclaimer: I do not own Storm Hawks or Slayers.
Positive vs. Negative
"Mmmmm…"
"Ummm, Stork?"
"Yes?"
"How long has he been hanging around you?"
"Oh, at least a day…"
"Do you think you should get rid of him now?"
"…"
"… Stork?"
"…... YES!" the merb screamed as he stood up from the table. Both Slayers and Storm Hawks watched as he started to have a panic attack. It wasn't bad enough that there were four, possibly unclean germ-carrying off-worlders onboard his ship. But getting stalked around by some strange negative-feeder that looked like a human was too much for him. "First, he ruined my Leak-Mold cure! Then, he released several poisonous animals onboard on the Condor. And then, he destroys several gadgets that I have been working on for ages! I swear, he wants me to die in some horrible, terrifying tragedy!"
"… Awww, Stork," Xelloss said as he floated around the merb, feeding off his anxiety, "That's because you make such a cute snack." Stork twitched in a scared fashion before looking over at the others with a serious look that said, "Get rid of him right now before he kills me". Lina just looked back at him with her look, "If we had any idea on how to get rid of him, he would have avoided us years ago".
Aerrow sweatdropped, seeing how much Stork was hating Xelloss' closeness. "Stork, you probably just need to relax. It's not like he wants to kill you or anything." The merb glared back at Aerrow, knowing that he forgotten that Xelloss was a Mazoku, a creature hell bent on destroying the world, including him. The sky knight chuckled half-heartily when he realized he had forgotten that fact.
"Well, Xelloss can have Stork all he wants," Zelgadis muttered before sipping his coffee. Once he was done, he set the cup down on the table. "Besides, if he hangs around him that means that he won't be bothering me any time soon."
Suddenly, Xelloss popped next to the chimera before cuddling with him. "Awwww, you do care." Zelgadis growled, before pulling out his sword before Xelloss popped back next to Stork. Stork glared back at Zelgadis for giving him back the parasite.
"Thanks a lot."
Piper sighed before looking at Lina. "So, you have no idea on how to get rid of him?"
"Well…" Lina replied while thinking. "… We do have one strategy, but…" The sorceress then looked over at Amelia, who had been flexing up her justice muscles. "Only Amelia can execute it properly."
Seeing that it was her turn to help, Amelia turned to both Xelloss and Stork, pointing her finger at the two. "Mister Xelloss! Feeding off the misery of others is an unjust thing to do! So, in the name of light and hope, life is wonderful!" The Mazoku looked sick for a moment, before returning to his normal self. "Huh?" Amelia was shocked to see it only work for a second. "Life if wonderful! Life is wonderful! Life is wonderful!" Each time she had said that phrase, Xelloss went back to being unfazed. This shocked the princess to see her tactic that had worked before fall apart.
Amelia turned back to Lina before apologizing, "Sorry, but I don't understand why it isn't working now…"
"I do." Zelgadis glared at Xelloss, who was still hanging around the merb. "He is using Stork's own paranoia and pessimism to counteract against Amelia's positive attacks." The group soon gasped in terror. Now, they'll never get rid of this problem.
"Then, there's only one thing to do!" Amelia shouted before turning Stork, "Mister Stork! You must feel positivity in order to combat Mister Xelloss!" There was an awkward silence in the room before everyone began to laugh their heads off.
"Amelia, Stork spent most of his life on Terra Merbia. Merbs from that terra are always paranoid and pessimist throughout their lives." Finn explained before thinking up some other things, "Of course, it doesn't help that he has faced other dangerous things, like the wastelands, Black Gorge, the Leviathan,-"
"Finn…"
There was a slight giggle across the table before the sharpshooter glared at Stork. "Not cool, dude."
"Well, that still isn't an excuse to feeling negative all the time!" Amelia then got up onto the table to do a justice speech. "Mister Stork! If you want to get rid of Mister Xelloss, then you must have positive and just feelings to do it! First, look in yourself to find the thing that makes you happy! Then, with all your might, shout out feelings of life from your very lungs for the whole world to hear! That is the way of a warrior of justice!"
Junko looked at Lina and asked, "Does that work?"
Lina looked back at the wallop and answered, "I don't know. I'm not a warrior of justice." Even though Amelia would like to think she was, Lina was definitely not.
Stork listened to the princess' speech before following it himself. First, he looked in himself to find the thing that made him happy, which would have been getting a new Anti-Mindworm Helmet 3000. Then, his feelings welled up inside of him like a big balloon. Finally, he opened his mouth to say the most positive thing that he had ever said…
"… Life is a black abyss, repeating the dreary events over and over again."
Everyone, saved for Stork and Xelloss, facefaulted from that phrase. He was supposed to say something positive, not a line from one of his dark poems. Of course, knowing Stork, his poems were the only thing that gave him little joy, along with his other hobbies.
The group soon got up, leaving Aerrow to say, "Well, I guess Stork has learned to live with Xelloss, right?" The merb glared at him with a face that said, "I'm never going to learn to live with him". Aerrow just shrugged back, showing that he couldn't think of anything else to do at the moment.
Luckily, Lina thought of something on the spot. "Hold on for a moment." She then grabbed everyone in a huddle and started to tell of her plan. Stork tried to overhear, hoping that it was something that could save him. Though, he couldn't make sense of it. As for Xelloss, he was too busy feeding to notice.
Soon, the huddle broke, leaving Lina to say, "Well, see ya later! We're off to Terra Neon now!" Stork went to ghostly white when she had said that. They were going to leave him with this… Person!
Xelloss looked at her and smirked. "Don't worry about me, Miss Lina. I'm content with staying here with Stork." The merb then went transparent. Now, he was really doomed.
"Well, good for you, Xelloss!" the sorceress replied before heading out the doors with the others. However, there was one exchange of dialogue between Lina and Gourry (Of whom I need to give some dialogue in this).
"But, Lina, I thought we were-!"
WHACK!
"Quiet, Jellyfish Brains!"
Afterwards, Stork was now alone on the Condor. He would have like his alone time better if Xelloss was bothering someone else instead of him. Oh well, if he somehow got killed during this, he could write out his will.
A while past and it was still quiet on the Condor, saved for Xelloss' humming. Now, the merb really wanted him to leave. But since he couldn't say or feel anything that could repel the Mazoku, he was stuck until help came. Maybe if he lived through this experience, he could try to create a device that could emulate Amelia's positive feelings and bounce it back at Xelloss. Luckily, he was going to survive, because both Slayers and Storm Hawks soon came back, bombarding both Xelloss and Stork in a group hug and positive sayings.
"Life is Wonderful!"
"Everything is beautiful!"
"It takes forty-two muscles to frown, but seventeen to smile!"
"Righteousness and true love conquers all!"
"RAWR!"
"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Xelloss screamed, before disappearing into thin air. Lina smirked as her plan to get rid of Xelloss worked. If it takes one merb's negativity to keep him here, then it would have token six humans, a chimera, a wallop, and a furry-creature thingy to repel him back. And now, that work, it would be a long time before the Mazoku came back to heckle them.
"Well, I doubt that would work a second time, but at least we got rid of that fruitcake priest. Right, Stork?" Lina said, waiting for a reply from Stork. After a few seconds of not hearing anything, she looked down at the merb she had saved. "… Stork?"
Stork, being free from Xelloss, was now lying on the floor, looking like he had caught a comatose-formed of rabies. Now, she realized the downside to her fantastic plan. Stork wasn't really much of a germ-lover by nature and possibly them hugging him has caused him to faint. In the merb's own mind, he now had to take a sterilization bath for a week.
…But at least the Mazoku would think twice before messing with his stuff.
Author's Notes:
Another one-shot coming your way! This time, it deals with Xelloss' feeding negativity from Stork. If you feel that there is some OOCness from the character, I'm sorry. I thought the comedy of the entire situation would over shadow it…
For those of you who don't understand, Xelloss is a Mazoku and Mazokus feed of negative emotions (sadness, anger, grief, etc.). From my perspective, Stork is a perfect lunch for him (watch Storm Hawks and you'll see why). Though, there are moments of glee when he explains symptoms or effects of some terrifying thing.
I'm working on some of my other projects. So, don't worry! I'll update something else up… Soon.
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