A/N: More angst! Shorter and a perfectly safe subject matter.

The Joke

Drakken barely paid attention to the lunch he was eating as he finished reading an article in Scientific Genius. He was excited to put to use the techniques they enumerated in his latest plan.

He turned the page to the jokes section of the magazine as he drank his coffee, his grin a bit wider than usual. Readers of the magazine were allowed to send in jokes, and he had been eagerly awaiting the printing of the one he had submitted. He had thought long and hard about his joke too and was sure it would make the cut.

As he scanned the page, his face bloomed into a smile. There was his joke. Small, easily missed by someone not reading closely, but there nonetheless with "D. Lipsky" printed at the end where author's names were always listed.

He stood from the table with the magazine in both hands, his arms stretched out in front of him as he stared at it. He was so excited, he wanted to share it with someone. But...who?

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and pushed the speed dial for Duff Killigan. The Scotsman was always up for a good laugh...

"What do you want?" was the greeting Drakken was met with when the line connected.

Drakken's grin faltered as he was a bit taken aback.

"Killigan, are you subscribed to Scientific Genius?"

"Am I what?"

"The magazine.

"What magazine?"

"...Scientific Genius. They have a jokes section where the public can submit jokes, and this week I—"

"Och Drakken, I'm teeing off. I dinna have time fer yer whining."

Drakken blinked in shock as the line went dead, and then he slowly scowled. Killigan seemed to take golf more seriously than he took even evil, at times.

With a grimace he paged lower in his contacts list until he found Monkey Fist. The simian villain always appreciated humor, especially if it was good.

The phone connected on the fourth ring, and the villain's voice sounded distant. Drakken grinned and opened his mouth, but then a sigh through the line interrupted him.

"What is it, Drakken? I am just sitting down to afternoon tea."

Drakken swallowed at the ill feeling Monkey Fist's disdained tone suddenly gave him. "I...just wanted to tell you about—"

"Your new plan to...let me guess...'take over the world'? Oh let me tell you mine, it's so much more interesting."

Drakken listened for a minute as Monkey Fist, obviously on speaker phone as Drakken heard occasional chewing and the clatter of china, began detailing some plan that involved a 'monkey horde' and stealing an ancient Cambodian artifact.

When there was no break in the man's words after several minutes, Drakken hung up. He peered down at the magazine in his hands and read over his joke again. His smile returned in the form of a tiny quirk at one corner of his mouth. It was so good! It demanded sharing.

He thought hard, and with a bit of disappointment as he realized there was no one else he could share it with... His mother couldn't ever be allowed to know that publication existed.

'Shego!'

He didn't know why he hadn't thought of her immediately. Probably because she never cared much for his science talk. He began hurrying through the lair with a skip in his step as he searched for her, the magazine becoming a bit crumpled under his tight grip. Surely she would appreciate the joke, he had written it so that anyone with a basic high school chemistry knowledge would understand.

When he found her she was leaning over his desk in the den, pulling out a drawer.

"Shego!"

She peered up with a slight frown as he rushed toward her, arms outstretched as he pointed to the magazine.

"What?"

"I've been published in Scientific Genius!" he cried happily, offering her the magazine as he stopped in front of her.

Shego gaped as she accepted the magazine. "You? They took something you wrote?" she said as Drakken pointed to the page. "What was it, a... Oh, just a joke."

An airy laugh left her lips and Drakken frowned.

"It's a very good joke, Shego!"

Her eyes narrowed at the page where Drakken pointed, and he waited as she read his tiny joke. And then, one corner of her mouth turned up. Warmth bloomed and Drakken's chest.

Just then Shego's cell phone beeped with a text message alert where it sat on the corner of his desk. She immediately set the magazine down and picked up the phone, flipping it open and quickly reading. Her expression brightened into a smile and she laughed long and loud at the words on the tiny screen.

The warmth began to leave Drakken's chest. "Who's that?

Shego turned to him and looked at him like she had forgotten he was there. "Junior. He's so funny!"

The warmth evaporated like breath in winter, and Drakken felt an empty feeling begin to settle in.

"We're going out... Oh, reminds me. Paycheck," Shego said.

Drakken noticed her casual attire for the first time as she went back to his desk drawer and a moment later was thrusting his check book and a pen toward him. He accepted the items and wordlessly filled in the familiar words and numbers. He tore the check off and handed it to her.

"Thanks! See you Monday," Shego said brightly as she left the room.

Drakken stood next to the desk and blinked after her for several minutes, the only sound in the room the crackle of embers in the fireplace. A sigh escaped his nose as he turned back to the desk and picked up the magazine.

"You wrote a joke, Dr. Drakken? Yes, would you like to hear it?" he said, conversing with himself. "I would! You always say such clever things! Why thank you Dr. Drakken. Here's the joke: Did you hear that oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK. Oh, you're so witty! Great joke, Lipsky! Thank you Dr. Drakken, that means so much coming from you! You're my best friend."

He stared at the magazine, the crackling of the fire drowned out by the loudness of his thoughts.

'My only friend...'

Drakken chewed on the bitterness of the thought that settled deep in his mind. He didn't want to let it out for the heavy finality it seemed to carry. And yet he couldn't help himself. The evidence, as he had seen it, was too strong to argue with.

'You'll never be that person for anyone.'

He blinked at his name on the page one last time. And then he threw the magazine into the fire, and left the den.