A/N: Little angst idea hit me this morning. There's another note at the end, but it's spoilery so wait to read the fic first. And as is typical of me, trying to write something short turned into something longer. But I'm not dissatisfied with that! Hope you enjoy. Please review!

My Heartbeat

Soft. Warm. The barely perceptible, but rhythmic and steady pulsing beneath his hand. Her heartbeat.

It was his anchor as he lay beside her, his eyes frequently closed during the long hours as he stayed with her in an attempt to comfort her—physically, mentally, emotionally... He didn't dare leave her side unless he had to.

His hand flat on her chest, feeling the slow, gentle beat of her heart, let him know that for the moment at least she wasn't panicking. But he knew what was in her mind, for it was the same thing that had been in his constantly for the past six weeks.

A hiss from her lips caused his eyes to open the second before her entire body winced in pain, her knees drawing up farther, her arms hugging her middle tighter, and her face twisting into a grimace. He kissed her bare shoulder repeatedly as she rode the wave of pain mixed with nausea, a symptom that had become a constant presence in her body. It kept her mostly bedridden for the past several weeks, and so he had resigned himself to the same. The pain was bad enough to endure; he couldn't bear the thought of her being alone in her fear.

Suddenly the warmth of her chest beneath his hand vanished as she rolled to the side and vomited into the bucket set next to the bed for just that purpose. He was on his knees in a flash, holding her hair back and rubbing her arm as she expelled only bile, for there was nothing in her stomach to actually throw up. She hadn't been able to keep food down for weeks.

When she was finished, he held the glass of water for her to swish her mouth clean and she spat that into the bucket as well. He considered encouraging her to drink, but the pained look on her face told him it would have to wait.

As soon as she was re-settled, he wordlessly left the bed to take the bucket to the industrial-sized sink in the lab to clean, as had become their routine. But not before setting up the backup bucket for her.

His steps were brisk as he hurried to complete the task, his head down and his brow furrowed in worry as he thought about the way her clothes hung loose on her body and how her hip bones seemed to be jutting upward more prominently when he watched her laying on her back.

As he cleaned the bucket he decided to bring up going to the hospital again. He thought he could convince her this time, but...he dreaded the emotional stress it would bring her, if he took the tactic that he thought would work. And he knew that being in the hospital would only add to her fear and stress, thus potentially making things worse.

It was a problem that seemed to be without a solution.

After returning and setting the bucket back next to the bed, and noting the backup bucket was still clean, he returned to her side where she had resumed the familiar position of trying to moderate her pain. Knees drawn up, forearms wrapped around her middle, head on the pillow with her tangled hair splayed in every direction, and her eyes closed with her face frozen in a permanent grimace of pain.

She looked so...helpless.

He carefully crawled back onto the bed next to her so as not to jostle her and make her pain worse, and when he lay down he kissed her shoulder repeatedly as he replaced his hand over her heart. After a few minutes of the slow, lazy kisses he shifted up onto his side and leaned partially over her. Her eyes slid open, and he hesitated just enough for her to see the sympathy in his eyes before he kissed her lips.

Time slipped away as they kissed, the soft and slow caresses a shared comfort that they both sorely needed. He longed to take her in his arms and bring her small form close to his and perhaps strengthen her through his soul... But such poetic things were only possible in imagination.

A hiss of pain escaping her lips parted them, and he stared down at her in worry as she blinked through the wave of nausea and discomfort. Her eyes pleaded with him as he remained hovering over her, their faces mere inches apart. It broke his heart and gave him the final push to make the suggestion, as there was nothing he could do to help her.

"I think you should go to the hospital," he blurted out.

Her gaze slowly focused as she writhed. She shook her head. "No. If I go in...they won't let me out."

He lifted a hand to slowly stroke her cheek, her skin hot and clammy to the touch. "Why not?"

"They'll just want to keep running tests... They'll try to analyze my powers, to see how they affect me and how they'll...how..." She trailed off as her throat constricted and her eyes started filling with tears.

Drakken sat up and slowly gathered her into his arms. She shook slightly from the pain of the movement, but soon her arms were around him and clinging to him as she cried into his shoulder.

The fear they both felt was tangible at almost every moment. Even when she felt up to getting out of bed and he could coax her into a walk for exercise, he knew...it was always on her mind. And he feared that the level of stress she was under would be just as harmful as her powers could be. But her inability to eat was the first and most important priority.

"But Shego... You've barely eaten in weeks. You're losing weight. The hospital can give you nutrients through an IV. It's not as good as real food, but since you can't eat—"

"I don't want to go!" she said desperately. "You know they'll run tests. And...if they find something..."

Her tightening throat cut off her words again, and he rubbed her back as she clung to him. He understood her fear. On the one hand, a hospital could give them constant status updates...and then if something was really wrong they could potentially know about it while there was still time to do something. But on the other hand... They could discover that everything they were hoping for was just a dream, and nothing more.

He dreaded the day they would be met with the cold, Earth-shattering truth that what they so desired was impossible—they couldn't have children. And he knew that Shego blamed herself, as much as it was an equal possibility that the loss of their first child may have been due to his mutated genetics; he couldn't dissuade her from the idea that it was just her. And her constant illness through both pregnancies only served as 'evidence' in her eyes.

He began kissing her head and rubbed her back as she continued crying into his shoulder. She had been more stressed that week than usual, and he didn't want to bring up what he was sure was the reason why. It was the seventeenth week—the same week that they had lost their first child. And now they were at the same threshold for the one currently growing within her. There was no way of knowing of course if there was anything special about that week. They didn't even know why they had lost the first one. But he understood there was a psychological fear that she was dealing with, however unscientifically based it may be.

He hoped that when the week was past she may be able to calm down, but he feared she would only get worse. In the rare moments he wasn't at her side, he had been researching and he knew that stress was the last thing a pregnancy needed. Not to mention malnutrition.

He gently drew her head back and her wide, frightened eyes met his, searching for something. After a moment she looked down, her face twisting in embarrassment and anger, no doubt with her own weakness. His heart broke.

He kissed the tears from her cheeks as she tried to control her labored breaths. And then she kissed him hard, just for a moment as she suddenly winced in pain, and then doubling over she turned to throw up nothing over the side of the bed again. Drakken pulled her hair back and covered her body with his protectively, hovering close to her heaving back. When her breathing began to calm she pushed against his back and then rolled to the center of the bed, he moving ahead of her. She leaned shakily on her side, staring at nothing, her eyes wide with dread.

He watched the trembling of her shirt over her chest with every heartbeat, slowing gradually as her vision began to refocus. He rubbed her arm ever so lightly as she swallowed and mentally shook herself of the emotions she was fighting. She looked up at him slowly.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly.

"No," he said quickly, gathering her up into his arms. "It's okay to be scared."

He felt her shuddering breaths against his chest as she held on tight. And for a moment he let himself feel it too. The dread of losing another child... Something they hadn't even been sure they wanted until they'd found themselves pregnant the first time. And now they wanted it so desperately it was almost painful. But...he needed to be strong for her. So he swallowed down his own fear and set his mind to solving the problems that he had some control over.

"Shego..." He leaned back and held her shoulders as she looked up into his eyes. She must have read what he was about to say because defiance suddenly sprang up in hers. But he was putting his foot down. "You have to get nutrition somehow. If you can't eat, then...the baby won't get any nutrients either. And then none of the rest of this will matter."

He saw in her eyes, reluctant as she was, that she knew he was right. And regardless, he was resolved. Even if it meant taking her to the hospital against her will. He wasn't going to lose their second baby just because she was too sick to eat. Not to mention...he was starting to fear losing her too.

"Okay. I'll try to eat something again," she said uncertainly.

"Good." Drakken stood up and stepped around the bed, scooping her up into his arms since walking while sick always meant a pause to throw up at least once. He also leaned down for her to grab a bucket in the event of such a problem on the way to the kitchen.

"Drakken..." she murmured as she set her face against his neck, her fingers lazily clinging to the bucket handle as it swung and bounced off his leg.

"Yes?"

He stopped walking as she lifted her head to look at him. Her eyes searched his, but for what he wasn't sure. He continued on more slowly as he watched her and waited. She glanced down a moment, appearing sad before she looked back up. They reached the kitchen and he took the bucket from her and set it on a chair.

"If...if we can't do this...are you going to be okay?"

Drakken's lips parted in silent surprise as he stared into her worried eyes. Had part of her fear throughout the weeks been for him?

"I know...you're trying to be strong for me, but I know that...this means everything to you. And if we can't...I still love you."

She slid out of his arms to stand in front of him as he continued staring at her in shock. Was she worried that if they couldn't have a baby that he wouldn't...want her anymore?

He watched her cheeks color as she looped her arms around his neck and spoke softly and shyly, but a bit desperately. "I love you...with all I am."

"Oh...Shego," he said in the split second before he kissed her. His arms locked tightly around her as he attempted to kiss away every fear and worry about their relationship that she had. The thought that he might leave her...for anything... But worst of all, the realization that she was insecure about their relationship.

If she weren't sick, he would carry her back to bed and prove his love in as many ways as she needed. He settled for proving kisses instead, his lips moving against hers powerfully until the salt of her falling tears joined the sweetness of her lips. And it wasn't until he felt her melting in his arms that he scooped her up again and brought his lips higher to kiss her closed eyes.

"Oh Shego," he murmured. "Darling..."

She slowly leaned away, a small smirk having found its way to her face.

"'Darling'?"

He blushed. He did often call her that and more, but just in his head...

"Dumpling?" he tried.

Her smirk grew. "Nostalgic..." she said with a nod.

Her arms tightened around his neck and he felt a grin coming to his own lips as he finally saw a hint of peace in her eyes. He took a breath and let spill many of the things that often ran through his head when he looked at her.

"My queen. My angel. Goddess. The most perfect woman to have ever existed."

Her smirk bloomed into a full smile, and he continued rambling on as he set her down on one of the bar stools before turning to the fridge.

"Sweetheart... My pearl... My jewel..." he said with a grin as he began gathering ingredients and piling them around the blender. "Babe... Hot tamale..."

Shego almost giggled at that one, but then her smile vanished as she held her stomach and doubled over, one hand gripping the counter as the other held her stomach. Drakken watched her for a moment until he was sure she wasn't going to need the bucket, and then he started up the blender.

Shego watched him with interest as she slowly recovered her good humor, her hand not leaving her stomach as she blinked at him. He finished blending the ingredients and then poured the mixture into a pot on the stove, after which he immediately began washing the blender.

"Keep going," Shego said quietly, her voice belying the pain she constantly felt.

Drakken thought of the other things he called her in his mind as he washed the appliance. "My star... My sunshine."

He nearly wiped his soapy hands on his pajamas, forgetting he wasn't wearing an apron. He wiped them on a dish towel and then stirred the broth he had made, smiling in satisfaction before opening the freezer and taking out a Tupperware of homemade ice cream. He set it on the counter in front of Shego with a spoon, and then followed it up by pouring a glass of coconut milk he took from the fridge.

"Ginger?" Shego asked, cautiously picking up the spoon.

"Yes. Eat a little of that first. If you can...keep it down, then we'll try the broth."

"Okay..." she said uncertainly, putting a tiny sliver of the ice cream on the edge of the spoon.

Drakken watched her slowly eat the sliver, tensing as she did so as if the minuscule amount of food would instantly cause her nausea to worsen. But after several seconds, it didn't. She took another small sliver onto her spoon.

Drakken turned the broth on the stove down to a simmer and then moved to sit beside her, setting a supportive arm around her. As he watched her nervously dissolve the second sliver of ice cream on her tongue, a thought occurred to him.

"Maybe...I could work some of my connections. And instead of going to the hospital, we could bring the hospital to you."

She looked at him in a mixture of curiosity and fear. But she put another sliver of ice cream on her spoon.

"Just...an IV, so you can get some more nutrition. And...maybe an ultrasound machine?"

Shego looked up and away at nothing. He watched the emotions play across her face as all the possibilities ran through her mind.

"We wouldn't...have to have anyone here. I can set it all up myself. And I know how to insert an IV—"

"Drakken... Okay."

He studied her expression as she looked at him. She still looked afraid, her tangled hair falling across her face as she gazed at him and struggled to make trust the dominant emotion in her eyes.

"My dream..." he said as he brushed her hair back. Her smile slowly returned as he offered more pet names. "My heartbeat... My world."

"I like those..." she said with a small smirk. "But how about...just 'dumpling' for when you feel like you need a pet name, and...'darling' in public, to rub our happiness in people's faces?"

Drakken grinned. But the moment of peace was broken as Shego grimaced and whirled around to hold her face over the bucket to throw up nothing again, the spoon gripped tightly in her shaking fingers as she retched. Drakken grabbed her hair and held it, wrapping an arm around her to support her as her legs began to shake.

As soon as she was done, he picked her up again so she didn't have to worry about standing. She hissed in pain as she tightened in on herself and leaned into his chest, her head falling on his shoulder. Drakken sighed and picked up the bucket, prepared to head back to their bedroom.

"Shego—"

"Put me down," she said shakily. "You're right. The baby needs to eat. I want to keep trying the ice cream."

He carefully set her back on the bar stool and after replacing the bucket on the chair he sat next to her. She put another sliver of ice cream on the spoon that she'd managed not to drop and then let it dissolve on her tongue. Drakken gently rubbed her back as he watched her struggle, helpless for what to do next.

As her shaking began to still she looked up at him, the familiar fear and worry evident through the pain in her eyes.

"We'll be okay, Shego," he said with authority, though he was sure his voice was shaking. But then through the fear, love began to shine in the green depths of her gaze.

"Drakken... Call me something sweet again," she said softly, a tiny smirk turning up the corners of her mouth..

He leaned closer to her and held her tighter as she put a slightly larger bit of ice cream on her spoon.

"My world... My heartbeat."

She licked the ice cream off the spoon and then rested her face against his.

"My love."

A/N: For those who have read my fic "Rekindling," this is a distant sequel.