Chapter 7: When Your Boss Has a Choking Kink… But so Do You
-.-.-.-.-
The moment Izaya comes back home, he makes a beeline for his computer. He barely gives Namie a passing glance and waves her off completely with a flick of his wrist and a quiet grunt. She doesn't complain, nor does she question him, although she does perk her head as if expecting him to give her the verdict of his conversation with Shinra. He doesn't. He's not in the mood, and it seems that she picks up on this since she stays absolutely quiet. The only thing she studies him for is signs of emotional instability: will he have another meltdown or not? Luckily, he doesn't. In fact, he tells her to take the rest of the day off, as well as the following day. No complaints there either.
She gathers her things, and before she leaves, she reminds him that she will be taking the 23rd off for the holiday, up until the New Year as per their agreement, and he informs her that it's fine by him so long she comes in on the 22nd. Which would be three days from now. She says her goodbye to him and departs, leaving Izaya all alone with his bright and brand new computer screen.
Look it up on the internet my ass, I'll look it up alright, he thinks as he opens up a new window, ignoring his usual chat rooms for once. He cracks his knuckles.
It's time to get down to business.
_._._._
For two days straight, Izaya keeps his eyes glued to the monitor in front of him to the point they become sore and bloodshot, and his vision starts to blur. All he does is research this soulmate stuff, reading article after article until he feels like his brain will turn to complete mush. Some of them seem to be fakes and are relatively easy to label as such. Yet some of them come from university websites and are marked as actual thesis papers for psychology students. How he had never come across such a thing while he was still in university baffles him. He doesn't dwell on that thought for too long though. Surely they must be from less prestigious universities. That's the justification he comes up with.
Until he finds a peer reviewed study on his own University's website that was published just one year after he'd already graduated. He narrows his eyes and skims through the text, picking out the most important bits of information:
[Previously thought to be a fictitious concept, the existence of soulmates has garnered significant attention over the past decade as scientists have been studying the validity of this phenomenon. In recent years, multiple studies have been conducted to assess the extremity of the worldwide incidents centered around soulmates.
Before delving into the subject, one must first ask: what is a soulmate? This definition is necessary before one attempts to understand the complexity of this concept. According to Tanaka Mario and Sakamoto Luigi, two Italian-Japanese plumber-psychologists-" ]
Izaya stops reading for a moment. This has to be a practical joke, right? There is no way this paper has any validity to it whatsoever. Quickly, he opens up another tab and searches those two names up only to see…
He deadpans, staring at his computer screen with wide eyes. They are two real people who started out as plumbers… and fixed some leaky pipes for a lady who was considered a princess, got paid a pretty penny, went to study psychology together, and specifically started researching soulmates over ten years ago.
What are the odds?
Izaya shakes his head in disbelief and goes back to reading the article.
[- a soulmate is a someone with whom one has spent many lifetimes with as a friend, lover, co-worker, or partner, and to whom one is usually drawn to the most. A soulmate, in essence, is a spiritual partner that best serves as one's 'other half', most commonly taking on the role of a romantic partner. A romantic relationship is not always the guaranteed default, and soulmate relationships can also be purely platonic. However, in the recent years, the term has been strictly adapted to refer to a romantic partner due to the recently discovered mental and physical symptoms associated with the soulmate phenomenon.]
Izaya rolls his eyes. He wonders who even approved this article since it just seems to get even more and more absurd its claims with each paragraph.
[Recently it has been speculated that the existence of soulmates dates back to the earliest formation of human society. Records show that…]
Blah blah blah
[While difficult to measure the intensity of the effects a soul bond can have on the human body…]
Blah blah blah
[-will have a variety of effects.]
The article goes on to talk about specific cases of soulmates found around the world, giving examples such as a couple in France who experienced unexplainable migraines when apart, couples who claim to be able to share memories, and even extreme cases such as literally switching bodies with their soulmate. And given such bold claims, it's no wonder Izaya has his doubts. Those doubts would be made even stronger, if not for the fact that the more he reads, the more he finds himself identifying with the article. The list of symptoms is rather extensive and includes the following:
- Being able to hear each other's thoughts or share thoughts
- Being able to share or experience the same memories
- Being able to share dreams
- Being able to sense each other's presence and general location
- Being able to feel each other's emotions
- Being able to share each other's emotions, often times experiencing them without choice
- Being able to share or feel each other's physical sensations, mostly commonly pain and pleasure
- Adopting each other's favorite hobbies / preferences / dietary choices / etc.
- Experiencing feelings of anxiety when apart
- Experiencing physical pains and/or illness when apart
- Feeling comfort, pleasure, or any unusual sensation from physical contact
- Having matching birthmarks and/or any other bodily marks in the same places
- Experiencing switching bodily features such as hair color and eye color
- Switching bodies entirely
- Experiencing reduced pain from injuries when in each other's presence
The article also mentions that this is just a list of all possible symptoms that one may experience, but it doesn't mean all symptoms will be experienced. Some experience one or two, others more. It all depends on the intensity of the relationship, as well as multiple other factors such as age, stage in life, and any other specific circumstances. More often than not, these symptoms tend to be displayed when the soul bond is particularly intense, but one or more of the parties involved refuses to acknowledge it. Instances where one or more of the parties involved start romantic relationships with others also generally bring out these symptoms. The longer the soulmates are apart, the worse the effects tend to be. However, upon establishing physical contact, the degree of the symptoms tend to lessen, and upon accepting each other as soulmates, the two parties generally stop experiencing symptoms all together with only mild leftover effects remaining.
There surely must be a limit to how many times Izaya can roll his eyes in one day before having them physically pop out of their sockets. All of this sounds as if someone took all of the soulmate tropes and squeezed them together into one conglomerate. But what he hates the most out of all of this is that he thinks he very well may be experiencing some of these symptoms. As a start, most of this started happening after Izaya had seen Shizuo with that deplorable woman.
Check number one: Shizuo being with someone else.
Then the touching happened – the weird warmth and tingle of electricity Izaya felt that day that he's pretty sure he doesn't feel when touching other people. At least, he thinks so. It's not like he can exactly remember how touching everyone makes him feel, since he doesn't exactly go around touching random people on a day to day basis.
For now, that's check number two.
As for number three?
Well, the unexplainable anger and mood swings would be enough of an indication. Shizuo does tend to get angry… a lot… actually, a lot is a bit of an understatement. Izaya has witnessed his own fair share of Shizuo's 'temper tantrums' and it's safe to say that the beast truly has no control when he succumbs to the rage within.
Then comes check number four: the sweets.
Izaya doesn't like sweet things and never has, yet Shizuo does. As well as dairy; both are things Izaya has been craving almost every day. Not to mention, the dreams. Izaya is more than sure now that those dreams are definitely about Shizuo, but whether or not they are memories or Shizuo's dreams or just fabrications of his own mind, that he cannot be sure of.
Nonetheless, it's technically check number five.
With a tired sigh, Izaya switches off his computer. All of this is far too strange and confusing for him. He doesn't want any of it to be true, nor does he want to believe in it. Of course, being the worldwide champion of mental gymnastics, Izaya thinks that if he just tries hard enough, he will be able to disprove everything he just read.
For now, though. For now he just wants to go to sleep. His eyes hurt from staying up too long, reading about all this borderline useless information. No point in dwelling on it now, he supposes.
But if there is one thing for certain: even if he can't disprove this theory, he will still do everything in his power to break whatever bond he and Shizuo may have. Whatever it takes, even if it means killing Shizuo and having to live with a supposedly 'broken heart' until the day he dies.
_._._._
After those two days of being confined to his house and spending countless hours researching and reading every article he can get his hands on about soulmates, Izaya finally takes a break to catch up on a pile of work he's been putting off for quite some time now. For the most part, he hasn't been experiencing any mood swings for those past few days and the sugar cravings seem to have subsided slightly, making his day to day existence somewhat more bearable. Fortunately for him, his aforementioned workload isn't all that big, as most clients are too preoccupied with Christmas preparations.
Though unfortunately for him, researching soulmates has taken out quite some time out of his usual people stalking time. He'd been hoping to sway the flow of information around a few of his 'game pieces' as an early Christmas present for himself, before the Western holiday finally came and he would be flooded with the unsightly swarm of couples.
Ah, but no use dwelling on it now. Just the fact that he hadn't had a single strange dream or fit of anger in the last 48 hours should be enough of a blessing. Namie will also be back today, so perhaps he can get his fill of teasing her as well. And he knows just the perfect way to go about it.
Ever since reading those articles, Izaya has been somewhat adamant about disproving the link between the strange symptoms listed and his own experiences. He doesn't know if Shizuo is also experiencing the same things or not, but he can at least put one of his theories to the test, since this particular one requires help from anyone but Shizuo. Specifically, he wants to try the touching thing. The last time they'd had any sort of physical contact, Izaya can distinctly remember feeling pleasantly warm with a little electric aftershock grazing his skin. But maybe Izaya had suffered some brain injury that made him have kinesthetic hallucinations that day, or that made his perception of touch different from the norm. Not like he pays specific close attention to how it feels when people are touching him, but now he thinks that perhaps he will be more attentive and see if his secretary has the same effect on him.
He spins around in his office chair, sliding around the area of his office and living room, from one end to the other, just as a child would. His chair is still new and the wheels on this one are much better than his old chair. If this is what having a new chair feels like, he thinks he should have broken the old one even long before his first temper tantrum.
You're late, he thinks as he continues to spin in his chair until he becomes positively dizzy from the vertigo. The time on his computer reads 8:05 in the morning. Five whole minutes of sliding around on the chair. Ugh, how much longer must he wait? Those five minutes truly feel like eternity, especially because he's actually anticipating Namie's arrival that day.
Finally, his trusty helper enters through the front door, and Izaya immediately stiffens. He switches his position to one knee propping him up on the chair, while using his other leg to push himself around until he slides all the way up to her.
"Good morning, Namie-san," he says in an upbeat tone as he leans his arms against the back rest of the chair, looking at her with a sly smile. She raises her eyebrow at him, clearly surprised by his sunny disposition.
"What are you up to?" She asks cautiously, eyeing him from top to bottom to make sure he isn't scheming anything inappropriate or that would make her feel annoyed and/or uncomfortable. His smile just widens. She probably thinks that he is indeed up to no good, since more often than not he would be. However, this time, her assumption is completely untrue, thought that doesn't stop Namie from making a disgusted face at the smile Izaya gives her.
"I need a favor from you," he says with a light giggle to his voice. Ah, and there it is: the reason for his cheerful attitude. Surely, he's sucking up to her. Trying to win her over by cautiously portraying himself in a positive light.
"I'm not taking you to a hot pot party," she replies flatly, probably thinking back to the numerous times Izaya has begged her. Izaya tries his best to ignore her comment, since it does bring up some bitter memories of not being invited to a hotpot by his one out of two friend. Not like he cares anyway, because he definitely doesn't. He's completely unfazed by it. Pfft.
"Actually, that's not it," he says as Namie sets her handbag down and goes to the kitchen. He follows her in his little swivel chair, watching her intently as she pours water into the kettle, before setting it on the stove and turning on the heat.
"What I actually want from you… is for you to touch me," he finishes. Namie stops what she's doing for a full ten seconds or so as she processes what he just said. Then, she turns on her heel and stomps her way out of the kitchen and over to him with her hands on her hips and her eyes narrowed, an angry scowl on her lips.
"First of all, that is disgusting and takes your sexual harassment to a whole different level. And secondly, the only person I ever want to touch is," here her crass demeanor changes to adopt a dreamy eyed expression.
"Seiji," she swoons, and Izaya rolls his eyes.
"So why don't you find someone else to make yourself less lonely? Hell, why not even go bother that monster of yours, he'll surely be more than happy to give you enough attention," she finishes. Izaya whimsically spins around in his chair. Oh Namie, if only you knew the reason for exactly why he absolutely cannot go to Shizuo with this.
"Are you done yet?" he asks. She jerks her head back, signaling her shock, before she nods her head. Izaya proceeds.
"Good, then. First of all, the only perverted one here is you, Namie-san, for thinking that's what I was asking you in the first place. Secondly, it would be pretty gross if you did touch me in that way. What if you infect me with your incestuous desires? I would never be able to look at my sisters in the same way again," he jokes rather crudely and shudders just at the mere thought of it. He drops the joking mood soon after, taking on a more serious demeanor.
"That's not what I had in mind though. I'm just trying to test out a theory and need you to touch me anywhere really. Can be on the arm, forearm, shoulder, back, whatever. Doesn't matter. Hell, you can even pretend to choke me if you're into that. I won't mind. Consider it as an early Christmas present," he says slyly with a small grin because he knows she would be more swayed by such a proposal. The woman probably wants to choke him on a daily basis, so this would be fulfilling her fantasy perfectly. Namie certainly does seem tempted. She takes a step closer to him and puts her hand on the back rest of the chair, just centimeters away from where his neck is.
"And you're fine with that?" she questions. Izaya gives her a nod of approval. The other reason he thought of the neck specifically is because of that first incident with Shizuo, when he'd felt Shizuo's grip wrapping around his throat.
Tentatively, Namie slides her fingers until they just barely graze the sensitive skin of Izaya's neck. She presses her palm against his airway and pushes down. He shudders slightly from her cold touch, but otherwise doesn't derive any feelings of pleasure from this. Her hand is just cold and clammy. Nothing special there. Just her chilly touch subtly tightening, slowly robbing him of his breath. He scowls, clearly displeased.
"Namie-san, I said pretend, not actually do it," he says with a huff and she instantly drops her hand, embarrassed that she had actually gone that far. And the only reason Izaya had let her go that far is because he knows she would have never been able to go through with it to the end. Otherwise, he would have stopped her a lot sooner through any means necessary. She keeps looking blankly at him after that, pondering if there's anything else he might require of her.
"That's it, that's all I wanted from you. Feel free to go back to work now," he says and makes a shooing motion with his hand before he spins his chair around and propels himself back to his desk. Namie just goes back to the kitchen, since the kettle was now giving off a shrill whistle from the evaporating water gushing out.
"And what about you? What are you going to do?" she calls from the kitchen as she starts brewing tea.
"I'm going out~ I'm feeling generous today, so in the spirit of Christmas, I'm going to give out presents…in the form of information, of course," he jokes as he checks a few last minute things on his computer.
"It's not a present if you charge money for it," Namie responds dryly as she places the tea mug on his desk.
"You're absolutely correct Namie-san, which is why I'm having a fifty percent discount on all sales. A bargain deal, wouldn't you say?"
"But by fifty percent, you mean full price while saying it's half off."
"Correct again."
_._._._
As soon as Izaya steps outside of his apartment complex, he's greeted with a gust of ice cold wind. At his feet there is a light blanket of snow. As of now, it's not much, but if it keeps snowing like that for the next few days, it surely will be a white Christmas. Wrapping his coat tightly around his chest, he steps onward to the train station, making his way towards ikebukuro.
Half an hour later and he's walking to his designated meeting point, merrily skipping around the streets. He's also a little restless as he tries to keep a lookout for Shizuo who would come rushing in approximately right about now to foil his plans with his usual unrestrained rage. To his surprise, the blond is nowhere to be found. As such, Izaya arrives a little earlier than anticipated. Of course, he's not crazy enough to wait outside and freeze to death in this weather. He's far too sensitive to the cold to be idly standing around in the chill of winter.
He decides to take a look inside one of the nearby stores. It's one of those small accessory shops that sell earrings, headbands, phone charms, and some other miscellaneous products. He's not particularly interested in any of that but still decides to take a look around the store, mostly for appearance's sake and to kill some time. Looking from one object to the next, Izaya eventually finds himself checking out a rack of sunglasses. Such a curious thing, why would these still be on display during this time of year? Who needs sunglasses in the winter anyway, when it's all dark and gloomy?
Of course there is one person that does wear sunglasses all year round, at all times of the day.
Heiwajima Shizuo.
Ugh.
Izaya quietly scoffs.
Why is he thinking of that monstrosity again? He doesn't know. He definitely doesn't know, and he wishes he could think about anything else, except the thought just won't leave his head. The longer he stares at the sunglasses, the more he can picture the image of Shizuo in said sunglasses; they'd look really good in them. The tint isn't too dark and is relatively warm in color. It's a stark contrast to the usual blue, but it would bring out the dark honey in Shizuo's eyes really well. And these frames are also a lot more stylish than the blue ones.
Not that the blue sunglasses look particularly bad or anything. Shizuo is definitely handsome in his own rugged way, and he definitely attracts quite a lot of attention, especially from the opposite sex.
Abruptly, Izaya slaps himself on the cheeks with both hands. What the hell is he thinking about now? It's just an arbitrary fact. That's it. Shizuo has always attracted people to him, and it's one of the things Izaya absolutely hates about the brute! Yes, that's right. He absolutely hates Shizuo and everything to do with him.
Without thinking, Izaya impulsively grabs the glasses and takes them to the front counter. The cashier asks if he would like to have that wrapped up in a nice bag as a present, and Izaya agrees.
They're for him.
Not for Shizuo.
Totally.
A present for himself, for Christmas.
Even if Izaya knows that the glasses completely won't suit his more feminine facial features, he still buys them. And maybe, when he finally puts them on, he can pretend to be as cool as Shizuo. Izaya snickers to himself as he exits the store. What a stupid thought. What an absolutely moronic and asinine thought.
Shizuo being cool.
Hah.
HA. HA. HA.
Well, Shizu-chan certainly can be impressive when pushed to his limits, the small voice in the back of Izaya's head thinks, just as a black car pulls up on the street in front of him. The tinted windows roll down, revealing a familiar figure inside the vehicle.
"I see you're doing some last minute Christmas shopping, huh Orihara-san?" the executive asks, and Izaya just smirks.
"What, this old thing? I guess you could say it's something like that," he says as he lifts up the colorful bag for a brief moment.
"Don't worry though, I haven't forgotten about you, Shiki-san. As it so happens, I have a present for you too," he smiles as he gets in the car. As it should be noted, both parties in the car are respectable and mature adults, so any strange or perverse connotations associated with Izaya's statement never even cross their minds. In fact, any proof of potentially inappropriate subtext from Izaya's side is further squandered with his next comment.
"In the form of some very interesting information, of course."
As if there was any doubt in the first place. This is not a Shikizaya fic people! :3