So, it's chapter 20. Finally. (I don't know why I'm saying that, because this is technically only Chapter 8 in the original version.) Some of it is fluff, a lot of it is solid plot setting. I don't know if I should be proud of myself or beat myself. It's not like it makes a difference either way. Just kind of surreal.

Warnings: It's shounen-ai, yaoi, slash, gay. Harry Potter is dating Tom Riddle. Remus and Sirius are dating. If you don't like it, why are you still reading this at chapter 20? I mean, really?

Notes: (X) is pov change and or time jump

Chapter 20: The Same

"You think Hagrid's alright," Ron asked.

"He said he was."

"And you believe him," Ron asked in disbelief.

"Yeah." Harry stretched out on his back, the clouds drifting through the sky. Aderes no longer seemed to be a threat. Now that they were an hour or so into class. The only time the Slytherin had acknowledged anyone was so, he could take the other Bowtruckle from Hermione when she and Draco had finished sketching it. Both creatures were walking over him like this was something normal for them, and Aderes seemed absolutely content with that. In other words, Harry didn't need to worry about the Slytherin randomly grabbing his hand right now or getting involved with their conversation. He glanced at Ron when he didn't continue the conversation. "What?"

"Nothing," Ron muttered under his breath.

"What should we do about Umbridge," Harry asked. Best to change the subject before things went sour, and they ended up fighting. Again. "We have to practice." Even if by some miracle Voldemort's plan to regain his powers had failed, they still had O.W.L.S. And really, the chances of Voldemort only regaining his powers for a single night were ridiculous. It would be nice, but Harry's life was never that simple, which meant he needed to be able to protect himself, not to mention those around him.

"We could practice by ourselves," Ron said.

They wouldn't get in trouble for practicing Defense spells in the Gryffindor tower. People did it all the time. It was more of an issue with space than anything else. Some of the spells would require a few feet in between the casters and it'd be an even bigger problem if someone accidentally walked in between them when they casted a spell or if a spell went wrong.

There was also the dueling club, but Harry suspected they'd rather disband than ever let him join again, even if he'd been trying hard to get the snake Draco had summoned under control and not to bite someone as everyone else believed. Draco might agree to clear his name now that they were sort of friends, but he didn't think that would change the members of the club minds much.

He sighed and draped his arm over his eyes. Why had everything fallen apart? Maybe not everything. He grinned, remembering the shadow's lips on his own and suppressed a laugh, as a feeling of lightness ran through him. He'd taken the initiative, something he'd been sure he'd never do, and had kissed him. And the shadow had returned the kiss happily. Would he get the chance to kiss him again before bed? It seemed likely since they usually went to sleep about the same time.

"We could," Hermione agreed. "There are study groups we could join—"

"I said we could practice spells, not study," Ron said.

Harry could hear the revulsion in Ron's voice, the mental image of him and the shadow snogging, fading. He turned onto his side, moving his arm from his eyes, his heart stopping. Aderes was also on his side in front of him, his eyes on Harry. "Don't do that!" Aderes laughed, Harry's face burning more. Why was everyone trying to give him heart attacks recently?! Was that the new pastime for the year? See who could kill Harry Potter first by heart attack? "Why aren't you playing with the Bowtruckle?"

"Professor Grubbly-plank wanted them back," he said, sounding like a child who'd just had his candy taken from him. "She wanted to get them packed up before class ended." He shot the professor a dirty look. "Even though we have twenty minutes of class left. I have no doubt she was just jealous."

Jealous of what? Who would be jealous of Bowtruckle using you as their personal tree? "So, go ask if you can help her with that," Harry said, rolling his eyes. He didn't need Aderes's undivided attention for the next twenty minutes of class or ever if he could help it.

Anger flickered across the other teen's eyes. "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"I'm trying not to have a heart attack or get us killed," he muttered, sitting up, and pulling out a clean piece of parchment. He placed it on the back cover of his Herbology book, wondering where he should start. His eyes shifted to the sky. Clouds had drifted over most of it now. Hopefully, it wouldn't start raining again.

"If you say so." He moved closer to Harry, their arms touching. "What's this about a study group?"

Harry's body instantly felt hot. He knew he should get up and move, but he couldn't deny that he enjoyed being this close to Aderes either. The shadow will murder both of us. It was strange how just last year, the only person who could make him blush was Cho, and now he wanted to snog Aderes and the shadow. You can't have both.

"Hermione wants to join one," Ron said as if she'd suggested they should go behead someone. "I just suggested we practice our Defense spells."

"A study group wouldn't hurt," Hermione snapped. "At least it wouldn't for you since Harry has a private tutor now."

"He's not a private tutor," Harry sighed. Private tutors helped you learn things. Harry still couldn't remember what had even happened in History of Magic the day before, beyond listening to the shadow's heartbeat. He might go back tomorrow and find out the classroom had burned down around him.

"I could tutor you," Aderes offered. "But it won't be cheap."

"No, thanks." He needed to keep his interactions with Aderes to a minimum. He owed the shadow that much, no matter how hot Aderes was or how much he was currently enjoying the small amount of physical contact they were sharing.

"You're far too loyal," Aderes sighed. "You're a Gryffindor if you've forgotten, not a Hufflepuff."

"You're not going to convince me to cheat on my boyfriend," he said, giving Aderes an gloomy look. "I don't even know you."

"I'd be more than happy to fix that," he said, smiling.

"I wouldn't." Despite his words, he still didn't get up and move, even after Aderes moved a tad closer to him. He knew he should, that he was pushing his luck for sure, but some crazy part of him was enjoying this.

"What are you doing?"

"I thought I'd get started on my essay for Potions." Aderes's eyes widened and he sat up. He heard Hermione gasp.

"Where has my best friend gone," Ron groaned.

Harry decided he no longer had any friends.

"You mean you actually started your homework ahead of time, without being threatened," Aderes asked.

"Yes," Harry said through gritted teeth. Just how much had Hermione told Aderes about him yesterday? "I do that sometimes." What he wanted was to get it over with so he could spend his evening free with the shadow. Homework would just get in their way of more important things, like possibly snogging.

"I can't believe it sunk in so thoroughly that even after it was erased it remained. I'm brilliant!" He looked incredibly pleased with himself.

"What you're talking about." Why were the good-looking ones weird? And it seemed the better looking they were, the worse their weirdness was. Lockhart was a perfect example of this. "Are you okay…?" Aderes no longer looked happy, but rather like someone had taken a dead fish and struck him across the face with it. The Slytherin didn't answer. Shrugging, he wrote his name on top of the parchment and the title 'The Properties of Moonstone' underneath. Moonstone must help with stress if it's used in the Draught of Peace. He wrote that down and then stared at his parchment. His Potion's book was in his trunk, and he knew nothing about moonstones. He wasn't even sure his first sentence was right.

Aderes seemed to have gotten over whatever weird fit he'd been having. "It's right," he grumbled after reading Harry's sentence.

Harry frowned. "Why are you sulking?"

"I'm not sulking."

He's sulking.

"Moonstones are used primarily in potions. They're known for stabilizing emotions and relieving anxiety." He frowned when he noticed Harry wasn't recording his words. "Why aren't you writing this down?"

"I'm not paying you for help with my homework. I can do it myself."

"Just write it down. I won't charge you for the first one."

I really shouldn't. He wanted the help, but the shadow had warned him about using Hermione and it would be wrong to just switch to Aderes. "It's okay. I'll do it after I get back to the dorm." Snogging his boyfriend would just have to wait. His heart sank as he remembered he had detention with McGonagall that night, and then he'd have to finish the essay. The chances of him having any free time at all vanished from his mind. Maybe he could at least get a kiss goodnight from him like he had at the infirmary.

"Why are you being so stubborn," Aderes demanded.

The bell rang, and Harry shoved his items into his bag. "It's just…" How could he explain it? After last year and talking with the shadow, he knew it was wrong to keep relying on those around him. Eventually he'd have to give everything he loved up. His friends, Hedwig, Sirius. Even the necklace. Voldemort wasn't their fight. The dark lord had made that clear in the graveyard. In the end, it would just be them. Letting anyone else stay involved in this mess would only lead to their deaths, and he refused to let anyone else sacrifice themselves for him. "I want to do it. I want to show myself that I can."

"No," Aderes said, his voice growing cold. "You don't and I won't let you."

"Even if I don't, I will," he said. He couldn't understand why his words were having such an effect on Aderes. Had he hoped to use helping Harry with his studies as a means to get closer? "I told you, I have a boyfriend."

"We need to get going," Ron said.

"You two are going to be late for charms," Hermione added stopping beside Ron.

"Fine," Aderes said. "This isn't over." He grabbed his bag roughly and started down the path, Draco following a few steps behind.

I've lost my mind. He wanted to go after him and had to force his legs to stay put. The shadow's been there for me all summer. You don't even know Aderes. Not that he knew the shadow much better, but finding out anything wouldn't be hard. Their minds were linked.

'You won't pass your O.W.L.S without help.'

'You're the one who told me to stop asking people for help!'

'I told you to stop asking Hermione, I never once said not to ask me!'

"Jeez, what was that about," Ron asked. All three of them seemed to have had the same idea of hanging back until Aderes was almost out of sight.

"Not sure," Harry said. He was more concerned about the shadow's comments and his own emotions than Aderes and his random behaviors. 'I don't want to be a burden.' He knew he already was, especially to the shadow. 'You've come to my rescue for almost every class and it's only my second day of school and I shouldn't rely on that. But when I have problems, I can't figure out… I'll ask.'

They started towards the greenhouse, Harry groaning when he saw Aderes and Draco had turned back. At this rate, the shadow was going to murder him. Aderes grabbed Harry by the wrist and started pulling him away from his friends. Ron looked to Hermione as if asking her permission if he should help and she had the nerve to shake her head no.

"What are you doing?!" He tried pulling away, but Aderes' grip was strong.

The Slytherin pulled him behind the greenhouse, gave a quick look to make sure no one else was there, and turned on Harry, his eyes narrowed. "Do you actually think you can defeat Voldemort by yourself?"

Harry blinked. Where in the hell had that come from? "What?"

"Answer me!" He released Harry's wrist.

"I don't have time for this," he said, turning. Before he could take a step, a barrier of light formed in front of him. Scowling, he turned back to Aderes. "You've lost it. If you don't let me out—"

"Do you think you can defeat Voldemort alone," Aderes asked again, his voice filled with contained rage.

"No, I don't," Harry answered. He really didn't want to talk about this right now, but if he didn't get Aderes to leave, he'd probably end up with yet another detention for being late to Herbology.

"So, you're just going to send your 'boyfriend' after him and hope for the best," he demanded.

Harry's heart stopped. "Of course not! I have every intention of leaving him and everyone else behind when the time comes!" That Aderes could even suggest something like that just showed how much he didn't know Harry. He hadn't even wanted to bring the necklace with him to Hogwarts for fear of what might happen.

The angry look on Aderes's face vanished, replaced by a pale, shocked one. His friends had finally decided to save him, and of course, at just the wrong time, no doubt having heard his outburst. The three of them had stopped together and none of them looked happy. "But—"

"You don't know me," Harry said, lowering his voice so the others couldn't hear. "You have no idea how many people have died because of me. I won't allow any more sacrifices. I'm not worth it. I'll do what I have to, I'll stop Voldemort and then…" He shrugged. He didn't know why he'd just told Aderes that. He hadn't even mentioned this to his friends or even the shadow, but being cornered only allowed for so many options. Still, he could have said nothing, but there was just something about Aderes that made him want to open up.

Ron came stomping towards Harry and shoved him, his back hitting the light barrier. "Are you kidding me," Ron demanded, his voice full of anger. "You were just going to leave and what? Die!?"

I'm going to kill Aderes. "This is why I didn't want to bring it up," he said. "I knew you'd get upset."

"Of course, we're upset," Ron shouted. It was surprising to see Hermione and Draco wearing the same expressions. He'd half expected it from Hermione, but not Draco. "We've been friends for years. You can't just expect us to let you run off by yourself! We're trying hard to so we can help!"

"I know that, but what kind of friend would I be if I got all of you killed?!"

"What if we didn't die," Aderes asked.

"Belt it Aderes. You have nothing to do with any of this," Harry seethed.

"Potter," Draco said, the warning in his voice evident.

"Draco, you know better," he half pleaded. If one of them understood how hopeless the situation was, it would be him. "There's no way this ends well."

"So, you're just going to give up," Aderes growled.

"No," Harry said. "I will never give up. I'll do whatever I can to survive, but I'm not stupid enough to believe that I have a chance against someone like Voldemort straight out of school." And that was only if Voldemort was nice enough to wait for him to graduate first.

"That's why you need help," Hermione said. "Ron and I talked about this over the summer… we know what we're getting into and whether you like it or not, it's our choice."

"No," Harry said.

"If Voldemort wins, it doesn't matter if you're dead or not," Aderes said. "I'd rather improve my chances of killing him by working together. You were almost taken out by a Gytrash and some Dementors over the summer. If you can't handle a minor inconvenience like that, I hardly have faith in your abilities to kill Voldemort."

Harry almost asked him how he knew that, then remembered Aderes's father worked for the Ministry and his court case had been in the Daily Prophet. It wasn't on the front page, probably because Fudge had lost, but they had printed it. "Fine." He knew fighting with them now was pointless. It would be easier to let them think he was willing to let them help and slip away when it came to that.

Aderes's look grew darker. "Draco, take the others and leave us be for a moment."

Draco frowned, his eyes flickering from Harry then back to Aderes. "Let's give them a minute."

You traitor!

"Are you going to talk some sense into him," Ron asked.

"I'm going to shove it down his throat," Aderes promised, walking past the redhead. Ron looked pleased and joined Hermione and Draco heading towards the front of the Greenhouse. "I could kill that old man for all of this," he growled. "All of my hard work, erased."

Harry had no idea what he was talking about, but his intuition was telling him to run. He held his ground though as Aderes stopped in front of him, his arms folded across his chest.

"Let's get something straight, Harry. You don't stand a chance against someone like Voldemort. Any preparations made were destroyed thanks to that cursed fool, mentally and probably physically. So here we are, back at square one."

"What—"

"So, we'll just clear this up right now. You do not get to be a martyr. You do not get to throw yourself in front of Voldemort as a shield. You are not allowed to kill yourself before our fight with Voldemort, nor are you allowed to just 'let it happen', because your life suddenly seems unbearable. You do not get to drown yourself in the lake for any reason, though if you'd like me to throw Weasley in, I'd be more than happy to watch him drown." He smirked, though his eyes were full of murderous intent. "Do you understand and swear to these terms or will I be forced to do the unthinkable?"

Harry took a step back.

Aderes chuckled. "Right, I already did that." The smirk vanished, and he grabbed the front of Harry's robes and pulled him forward, their faces even. "Swear to me you will not be stupid and get yourself killed," he hissed.

The fear Harry was feeling broke. He glared at Aderes and with a hard shove, removed the other teen's hand from his robes. "You don't just get to walk into my life and start making demands!"

Aderes raised an eyebrow. "Don't I?"

"NO!"

The Slytherin stared at him another moment. "You…" He sighed. "I thought you didn't want to explain to the others… I played along, but…" He shook his head before sighing again. "You really…" He placed his forehead in his hand.

Harry wondered if Aderes was losing his mind. Nothing he said was making any sense. "I have to get to Herbology…." When Aderes didn't answer he started past him. The Slytherin grabbed his wrist yet again, with his free hand, holding it tight.

"You were not dismissed." He removed his hand from his face, his eyes slits. "I'm not sure who I'm angrier with. You or that fool running the school."

"What does Dumbledore have to do with this?"

He took a breath and released Harry's wrist. "Promise me."

"I'm not—"

"Then you won't be joining your classmates for Herbology."

Harry stared at him. Where the hell was the shadow to throw Aderes into a wall? Surely, he posed more of a threat than Ron ever had or possibly could. He was always there protecting Harry, and they'd just been talking a moment ago. Unless… Something must have shown in Harry's eyes, because Aderes was watching him. "How…?"

"Not here," he said, his body no longer as tense as it had been. "Now you've two choices. You can promise me you won't be an idiot and I will walk you to the greenhouse where you may join Hermione and that friend of yours and I can trust you with all the poisonous plants you could imagine or you don't and I simply hold you against your will until you do."

The entire speech was mad, and Harry believed every word of it. If he lied, Aderes would know immediately, and then what? "I don't want anyone hurt."

"Then I suppose you'll have to accept my terms. Did it ever occur to you how hurt I'd be if you just vanished?"

It had, but Harry had decided it was better for the shadow to miss him, if he was capable of such a thing, rather than to die. "I didn't even know you were real!"

"So, you told me last night," Aderes said, obviously annoyed. "Good to know I have to worry more about you cheating on me with magical objects than another human. At least destroying the item won't get me sent to Azkaban." He slipped his arm around Harry's waist, the familiar warmth coursing through him.

They were walking towards the greenhouse entrance before the movements even registered in Harry's mind. None of this could be real. There was no way the shadow and Aderes were the same person. It wasn't possible. "W, why didn't you say anything last night?"

"I didn't think it was necessary."

"Are you joking? How was I supposed to know?!"

"The bond."

"Yeah, right…"

Aderes stopped him again. "Is me being an actual person a problem? Do I actually need to wipe your memory and go on pretending to be charmed item?"

"N, no," Harry shouted, his face red. Aderes and the shadow being the same made him happy, it just seemed impossible. The growing fear of having to choose between the two of them vanished. It wasn't that he liked one of them more than the other, he wanted to be with Aderes because he was his boyfriend to begin with. He just hadn't known it.

"I just… didn't expect it and I mean… you and me?"

Aderes arched an eyebrow. "What about us?"

"You're… you," he said, knowing that didn't make much sense, but his mind was fast turning to slush. "You," he said again.

"Yes me," Aderes repeated and frowned.

I can't do this, he decided. It would take him the rest of the day to come to terms with this, and he still had a class and a detention to make it through first. He leaned into Aderes's embrace; the Slytherin drifting to the side with him.

"H, hey!" He regained his balance and managed to keep Harry standing. "Don't just faint!"

"I didn't faint." Though a part of him wished he had. "This is a lot to take in."

"I guess so," Aderes said. "You still haven't made that promise and you only have two minutes before class starts."

"Because I'm mentally stable enough to promise anything."

"You've never been mentally stable enough for anything, so I can't be picky."

Harry glared at him, Aderes smiling.

It's not like he'd been trying to get himself killed to begin with, he was simply being realistic. Still, he wanted the shadow's, Aderes's approval. "Fine, I promise I won't intentionally get myself killed."

Aderes leaned in and kissed him. Any thoughts about Aderes lying to him vanished. "Good." He walked Harry to the entrance of the greenhouse. "Did you need my help in Herbology?"

"Shouldn't you be paying attention in Charms?" It would be wrong to ask Aderes to tutor him during class now that he knew the Slytherin had his own classes to tend to. How had he even managed it the other times?

Aderes snorted at that. "I've already learned everything this year has to teach."

"Oh…" That didn't surprise Harry as much as it should have, and yet he still found it impressive.

"I've no interest in relearning, something I've already mastered." He glanced at his watch, seemed satisfied with what he saw, and kissed Harry again. 'I'd much rather tutor you or kiss.' Reluctantly, he stopped. "But you've twenty seconds so." He gave Harry a gentle push, and he found himself standing just across the threshold of the greenhouse door. "I'll see you soon."

Harry nodded, unable to get any words out.

"Don't fall in love with a plant while I'm gone." He turned and joined Draco, who looked rather annoyed at having to wait. They started towards the castle, just as the bell for class went off.

He turned towards the tables, his eyes widening. Every single Gryffindor was staring at him with either shock or revulsion. I just kissed a Slytherin in front of everyone. Even Ron was staring at him in horror. Well, it wasn't like he could take it back and even if he could, he wouldn't. He found an empty table and sat down at it. His heart was beating fast, but not in a bad way. He knew everyone was talking about him again, but it didn't matter. He lifted his hand to his face and realized he was smiling. Despite everything going on, he was actually happy. He understood now why Sirius hadn't gone completely mad after he'd escaped from Azkaban. It was thanks to him being reunited with Lupin.

'Sorry I made you late for class.' He did feel guilty for that. But he had a boyfriend, a real human boyfriend, who was hot, and who cared about him enough to throw people into walls to keep him safe. Okay, that wasn't something he should be happy about, but it wasn't just Ron. Aderes had saved him from Umbridge.

Aderes chuckled. 'I have a permanent late pass.'

'Oh.'

'I guess given who your dad is, you get away with a lot, don't you?'

'Huh? Oh, William? I lied about that,' he said smoothly, Harry blinking. 'I needed a family name, and that seemed like the best choice given Umbridge's intrusion into the school.'

'So… what's your real name?'

'… I prefer to go by Aderes.'

'Okay…'

"Mister Potter!"

Harry jumped, his eyes snapping towards Professor Sprout. She did not look happy.

I really need to figure out how to talk to Aderes and pay attention to everyone else. Aderes made it look so easy, but it really wasn't. He felt like he needed to give Aderes his full attention when they were speaking through the bond, but maybe he didn't?

"S, sorry," he said. "I just don't feel that good."

"Sure, because you looked so sick when you were kissing that Slytherin," Lavender shouted.

"You're just jealous Aderes was kissing him and not you," Hermione said.

"Enough," Professor Sprout shouted. "This is your first Herbology class of the year and we have much to cover so you can pass your O.W.L.S. We don't have time to worry about who's kissing who!"

'I think you started a war.'

'Hmm?'

'You pushed me into a room full of jealous Gryffindor.'

'They'll get over it. It wasn't like any of them had a chance, anyway.'

Harry pulled out his Herbology book to at least look like he was doing something class related. 'Why did you choose me?'

'Trust me. There's not a single person in Hogwarts who can handle me, but you.'

"You may begin."

Harry paled. He had no idea what he was supposed to be beginning. Hermione must have noticed his panic because she joined him at the table, Ron following.

"We're tending to Mandrake seedlings," Hermione whispered.

"Thanks… for earlier and this."

"As long as Aderes got through to you. I'm angry you don't trust us enough to help you, but I understand too. Especially after last year."

"Well, I don't," Ron said, still sounding somewhat angry. "We've been helping you from year one and we're still here. And why in the bloody hell did you kiss Aderes?" He lowered his voice. "Are you trying to get that shadow thing to murder him?"

"Oh, right. Eh, turns out they're the same person," he whispered.

"… Are you telling me Aderes just… decided one day he wanted to meet you, shoved himself into a necklace, mailed himself to your house, and neglected to tell you he wasn't a magical object?"

"Eh… sounds about right."

"And you still…?"

"Yeah," he admitted, his face burning. The way Ron put it made Aderes sound like a creep. Okay, Aderes was kind of a creep, but he was Harry's creep, so it'd be okay. They'd make it work. He'd wanted to date Aderes when he'd believed he was the core of a magical object, why would him being a creep change his mind?

"You're mad," Ron muttered. He stood up and went over to the table of plants and started inspecting them.

Was it really that bad? If he'd known from the start that Aderes was a real person, would it have made a difference? He ran the events of the summer through his mind, only instead of the shadow or a necklace, he placed Aderes in those memories. His heart beat harder. Nope, doesn't matter. "Hermione?"

"Yes?" She looked up from her pot. She'd already removed some of the weeds and had begun adding dragon dung to it.

"Do you think I'm crazy for not being freaked out about this?"

"No." She rotated the small pot and sprayed a mist of water from a spray bottle at the base of the stem. "Aderes filled me in over the summer."

He stared. "What?"

"I was going to tell you, but he asked me to let things happen naturally."

"So, what exactly did you talk about?"

"A lot," she admitted. "Things I didn't even think were possible until he showed me proof." She gave Harry her full attention. "I know it's a little strange right now, but I promise, Aderes cares about you, a lot."

"Right, because he's telling you everything and not me," Harry asked. He couldn't deny being a little angry and even more jealous. If Aderes cared about him so much, why was he explaining everything to Hermione and not him? That wasn't fair on any level.

She sighed and stood up just as Ron sat down with a pot. "Harry, Aderes and I are not interested in each other. We're friends." She grabbed her pot and walked over to Professor Sprout.

"What's her problem?"

"Me," Harry said. "I guess Aderes and her have been talking all summer."

"And he didn't tell you?"

"No."

"That's not a good sign."

"I know," Harry said, irritation creeping into his voice.

"You going to ask him about it?"

"Yeah." But it would have to wait. For now, he needed to focus on his assignment. If he brought it up to Aderes now, his emotions would get the best of him and he didn't want to fight again. No, despite this off the wall chaotic day, Harry just wanted to find a quiet out of the way place and snog his boyfriend.

(TBC)

I tried not to let Harry find out so soon, but Aderes insisted. I also figured it's twenty chapters in. Harry deserved to know.