The service had been over for hours, yet the streets were still packed. The whole city had mourned the loss of life in the palace, either participating in the cumulative service, or holding their own within their houses. While not everyone knew someone personally that had died in the incident, they were still citizens of Ashuron; and Ashuron had lost more than a prince that night. They had lost their guardian, the founder and protector of their kingdom: Rosa, the demi-god.
Kanae watched what looked like a small family, comprised of a young mother, father, and son approach a statue of Rosa. They each pressed their hands together, a cluster of drifting lights indicated they had each released a prayer stone. Kanae couldn't fault them for praying. They would need all the help they could get.
The family left, only to be replaced by another group, then another. Kanae watched from her perch on the second floor of the palace. She was wearing her old clothes, a battered tunic and brown cloak tucked around her. The altered palace uniform had been retired. She didn't have any need for it since the object of her work was no longer here.
She ran a finger around edge of her spear, the shaft resting on her knees. Everything she needed to travel was packed in the sack on the ground. She was completely ready to go, there was just one thing…
The banister gave a slight wobble as someone adeptly swung into place beside her.
Shin's legs dangled over the edge, hands placed on either side to keep balance.
"I missed you at the service." said Shin.
Kanae gave him a sidelong look, examining his expression. He appeared to be in his normally cheerful mood, humming as he looked out upon the city. A bandage peeked out from under his sleeves and bracers, and a large bruise tinged with yellow stood out sharply on his right arm. All things considered, he looked rather good.
"I didn't belong there." Said Kanae, turning her gaze back to the statue and the families gathered around it.
In truth, she had been present. She had stood in the back of the room, dressed as one of the servants so as to blend in as she watched the private service held for the nobility and royal family.
She had felt odd being there. Her connection to all of this was second hand, mostly through Kyoko. She'd left soon after it had started, but not before witnessing a few things.
"Of course you'd have belonged!" Said Shin swinging his feet in the air as he spoke. "Anywhere I'm allowed, you should be allowed too. Anyway, a beautiful woman is the perfect balm for a troubled heart. I could have hugged you as you cried in sympathy for my loss. I of course, would have nobly blinked the tears from my eyes in a mixture of bitter and beautiful emotions, and knit our hearts together in this troubled time."
Shin looked at her sideways, opening his arms and said "Actually, it's not too late now."
Kanae gave him a flat stare.
"Sometimes I forget how completely insensitive you can be." Said Kanae. "And then you open your mouth."
Shin waved his still spread open arms. "So, is that a 'no' on the hug?"
Kanae kept staring, unsure how to react. A strong part of her wanted to take her spear and thwack him over the head with it. Another part wanted to at least extend some sort of comfort. Especially after what she had seen in the ceremony.
Shin and his mother had been near the front. The poor woman had been sobbing the entire time, Shin never leaving her side. He'd held her for the entire time Kanae had been present, rubbing her shoulders affectionately. Occasionally his kind expression would fall, and a bitter anger would show through.
His father was gone, and though Shin hadn't gotten along with him, it was still his father. Still the man that had raised him. There were sure to be some complicated emotions.
The scene hadn't faded from Kanae's mind. She doubted she would ever forget it.
"Is your mother going to be alright?" said Kanae.
Shin shrugged, lowering his arms. "She's better off without him, though it will take her a long time to realize that. Bastard. Even in death he excels at making mom sad."
"That's a little cold." said Kanae. "He was your father."
"And an accursed." Said Shin, "who planned to kill his brother, take over the kingdom and blame another country to start another war. Father of the year right there."
He said it dismissively, as if he really didn't care. Kanae frowned at the tone.
"Are you going to be okay?" said Kanae, in a rare moment of verbal concern.
"Okay? I'm going to be perfect!" said Shin, stretching his arms over head, a smile replacing his previous seriousness. "I feel great. Lory's got the best physicians in the kingdom looking after me. You can't even tell I got stabbed, which I'm kind of sad about. No one will believe my story about the crazy snake girl unless I have a scar to prove it."
Shin lifted his shirt, revealing the bandaging underneath. Kanae stiffened as he ran a hand over the fabric with a frown. "Do you think I'd get in trouble for tampering with it?" he said seriously.
Kanae's feet hit the balcony floor. She grabbed her bag and flung it over her shoulder, walking away from Shin. Her insides were boiling with irritation.
"Where are you going?" said Shin. She heard him scramble behind her, hurrying to block her path. She stopped, leveling a glare at him. It was very tempting to keep walking and plow into him.
"Are scars not your thing?" said Shin. "I was joking, we can make sure it heals correctly, though I'll have to go have a talk with-"
"Stop it." Said Kanae, cutting him off. "I'm sick of hearing your prattling. Why can't you be honest for one damn minute?"
He opened his mouth, blinking at her in confusion. Kanae cut him off.
"Stop." Said Kanae again. "Don't you dare say you are being honest. No one, I repeat, no one would be unaffected after everything that happened to you. Your father died, betrayed the kingdom and tried to kill your uncle. Your cousin became an accursed, your kingdom was attacked, and… and!" Kanae hissed the word, stepping close to Shin. The man took a step back, eyes widening. "To top all of that off, everyone you know is accusing you of being part of this."
Kanae was breathing hard, fighting to stop herself from yelling. After everything that had happened, that last part was what really irked her. She'd seen it first hand, people gossiping about the royal family. About who could be trusted and who couldn't. She'd watched from the side as Shin had laughed off their accusations. He had flipping laughed at the idiots who accused a man who had already lost so much in the past few days.
Those morons had no idea what Shin had gone through to keep everyone safe. To save the kingdom. Her and Shin had nearly died to protect the inhibitor, and they had the gall to accuse Shin of betraying them!
The worst part was that Kanae couldn't blame them. Not when she'd had the same suspicions a few days ago. Especially when everything pointed to him like it did now. His father had turned out to be an accursed, and Shin hadn't been seen by anyone during the fight except those that had been with him in the catacombs. Kanae was the only person that could promise he had been there. Until Julie woke up, there was no one with any sway that could vouch for him.
And so they continued to gossip, and Shin laughed in response.
"This is what caused me to think you were an accursed in the first place." Continued Kanae. "You hold yourself above everything that is happening with your cocky attitude, your stupid laugh and smile- like the one you're giving me right now!"
"I can't help it." Said Shin, eyes twinkling. "You're so angry for my sake, it's endearing."
Kanae let her breath out through clenched teeth, feeling as if she might breath fire.
"Were you listening to me?" said Kanae.
"Every word."
"No you weren't. You were trying to divert the topic by embarrassing me. Is it really that hard for you to be honest? To be vulnerable for one second!"
Shin's face smoothed into a calm smile. He wrapped his arms around Kanae, pressing her face into his chest. Kanae stiffened, but didn't push away from the hug. Her arms stayed awkwardly at her sides, spear in one hand and bag in the other.
"I didn't say I wanted that hug." She grumbled
"Humor me for a moment." Said Shin. His voice sounded thicker than usual. "I'm trying to do as you asked."
That's when she noticed the tenderness in the hug, the way his hands held her against his chest. There was a complete change in his aura. He had become very still, an accomplishment for the man, which meant she had been right. He had been affected. He was holding it in, staying firm against the siege of bad events.
She relaxed, leaning into the hug as she understood the importance of this gesture. He was inviting her in past his defenses. Being vulnerable, as she had asked him to be. Yet of course he couldn't do it in a normal way. He had to hug her. He was probably going to insist that she start crying so they could – what had it been? – 'knit their hearts together in this troubled time.'
I have to admit, this does feel nice.
Kanae wasn't used to physical affection. Well, besides the force of nature that was Kyoko. Even that was different from this. Kanae closed her eyes. It felt warm, safe. A hug from a man was very different than a hug from a small petite girl.
Shin shifted, resting his chin on the top of his head as he gave a loud long sigh.
"Oh Kanae." He said. "You're really in danger of stealing my heart."
"It wasn't on purpose." She said.
Shin laughed, the rumble reverberating in his chest. "Yes, you made that perfectly clear."
They stayed there for a few moments, silent and enjoying the comfort. Shin was lazily running a hand up and down her back. Eventually he spoke again.
"Can I expect you to be honest with me?" he said.
She didn't respond. Honesty… now that was something she had a problem with as well. But, she had asked the same of Shin. Shouldn't she extend the same courtesy?
She only hesitated a second more before nodding against his chest.
"At the end of the fight." He said. "You threw yourself at Naomi. You were reckless. Desperate to save me… Did it remind you of your master?"
Kanae opened her eyes very slowly, leaning away. Shin allowed her to do so, his arms keeping her close.
"In a way." She answered. "But not until after the fact. All I was thinking was that I didn't want to see you die."
Sure, the situations were somewhat similar. She had been led away from her master when he had been attacked, much like what had happened with Shin. But the biggest difference was her own strength. Her own abilities had grown, and she had been able to save hi-
Her brain stalled as she realized Shin was getting a little too close.
What was he… oh heck!
Kanae dropped her bag as her hand shot out on instinct, stopping Shin's descending lips.
"What do you think you're doing?" said Kanae, heat rising to her cheeks as she glared at him.
Shin smiled. She could feel it against her fingers as his lips tweaked upward. The sensation was so strange it increased the heat in her cheeks.
"I'm trying to kiss you." He said. "I thought it was obvious."
That was when Kanae decided she'd had enough physical stimulation for the day. She scowled, pushing herself away. He barely moved, but it was enough for Kanae to step away from him.
"Did I say you could kiss me?" she scolded, swinging her spear to rest it on her shoulder. It was firm, secure and constant. Familiar. Different than these turbulent emotions Shin had managed to produce from her.
"I thought you'd like a proper goodbye." Said Shin with a shrug. "Since you're leaving."
Since when were kisses part of proper goodbyes? Well, unless the two in question were in some sort of relationship, which they were not. They just had an understanding… right?
"My contract with Lory is done." Said Kanae, looking away. "There's no reason for me to stay."
Her stomach tightened at her own words. The second she'd felt insecure she'd gone back to lashing out. Ugh, it looked like she was just as guilty at being dishonest.
Despite her potentially hurtful words, Shin didn't appear affronted. He instead gave her a knowing smile.
"That's not it." Said Shin. "You're leaving because you have to fulfill something. A duty you won't trust to anyone else." He gave a sigh, folding his arms as he leaned to one side against the balcony. "I understand, because it's a similar duty that calls me to stay instead of go with you."
"I have to make sure she's okay." Said Kanae. It almost felt like an excuse.
Shin nodded, indicating he understood. "And I have to take care of my family. Uncle Kuu is going to need everyone's help in the next few weeks. Then my sister is coming up with her husband... It's going to be a mess."
"You have a sister?" She'd never heard of him having one.
"I do." He said with an interesting grimace. It looked more like a wince. "She's older and married to a rich bureaucrat in Kells. Natsu is a piece of work, let me tell you."
"She is your sister." Said Kanae, as if that fact alone should explain everything.
"You are determined to wound me." Said Shin. "Shall this be our parting? Harsh words shot towards one another in our time of grief and heartache? It is too much. No, I shant forgive you no matter what you say."
"Well isn't that just terrible." Said Kanae flatly. "It looks like that ended before it could start."
"Don't be so hasty to give up." Said Shin quickly. "I said that I wouldn't forgive you no matter what you said. Now, if you were to give me a goodbye kiss, then I might forgive you."
"Is that a fact?"
"It is." He said solemnly. "Only a kiss from your poisoned lips can heal the pain in my heart."
Just... what? Since when were her lips poisonous? He was making a jab at her sour attitude no doubt.
Kanae sighed. He was so… words failed her, so she decided to act out on her frustrations.
Kanae dropped her spear and yanked Shin down into a kiss.
Based on his stumble, he hadn't actually expected her to kiss him. He recovered a moment later, pulling her against him. Kanae hadn't meant for it to be anything but a short smooch. That didn't happen. She found herself unwilling to retreat from the sensations flooding through her. All her pent-up frustrations and desires were being expressed in this kiss. Her apology and her goodbye.
They finally broke apart, lips tingling and heart hammering. She realized one of her hands had circled around his back, the other tangled in his collar. He met her gaze with his customary cheeky grin, through there was an extra smugness that irked her.
"I take it back." Said Shin. "You're not allowed to leave."
"Since when do you have any say over my actions?" said Kanae.
"Since I learned what a great kisser you were." Said Shin, suddenly becoming serious. "You haven't been practicing with other men have you?"
Kanae couldn't help her lips twitching up into a smile. She shoved him away, the man grinning as well. She grabbed her spear and bag from the floor, sending a silent apology to her weapon for dropping it so carelessly.
She then rounded on Shin, pointing at him with an angry glare.
"When I come back," she said. "I'd better not have heard about other women you chased in my absence."
"Of course not," he said, not intimidated by her anger if that smug grin was anything to go on. "You are the only one in my heart." Then he paused, as if he expected her to say something.
"What?" said Kanae.
"Shouldn't you promise something as well?" he said. "Or say that I have you heart as well?"
"Sorry. A certain idiot physician already claimed a portion of it without my permission."
"Fair enough." Said Shin. "Give the two idiots my love when you find them."
When she found them. There was no question on if she could find them. He believed she'd be able to.
Kanae stepped forward, placing a hand against Shin's face. He smiled warmly at her, leaning into the touch. How in the world she had managed to fall for such a fool was anyone's guess, but she had, and it made her happier than she would ever admit.
She pressed a kiss to his cheek.
"Until we meet again." She said.
"Until we meet again." He murmured.
She brushed her thumb on his cheek one more time before slapping him gently and turning, chasing after the only other person that had stolen her heart.
Kuon ran through the palace, heart beating in denial to what was happening. He could hear fighting ahead, see the aftermath of small battles in the corridor.
He burst through the door, entering the scene of men before him. On one side stood four palace guards. On the other, stood a group of men Kuon had been associating with for the past weeks. Men he could almost call friends. Both had weapons drawn. Both had men lying dead on the ground.
Kuon spotted a certain man in the group of his would-be friends, a man that had betrayed Kuon. Anger flared inside of him.
"Harker!" Kuon bellowed. "Stop this at once!"
The group stilled. It wasn't surprising. At 16 years old, Kuon already towered over most men in both, stature, and anger. He strode confidently through the room, both sides shrinking in his wake.
Only one man didn't appear frightened. Kuon gritted his teeth as the slime ball smiled pleasantly at him.
"Ah, Prince Kuon." Said Harker. "I wondered when you were going to join us."
Kuon came to a halt, right between the two parties. The guards were leaning against each other, hope evident in their eyes. What business they had looking all hopeful was anyone's guess. Kuu was their king, not Kuon. He was just a failure of a copy. As much as he hated their expectations, it was the other group that received his glare. The ones that had freed him from the constrains of his duties and embraced who he was. The ones he had believed.
"Michi." He said. "Enna, Kichiro, I'm honestly disappointed. I thought you were smarter than this."
The men he had named managed not to flinch, though the color did drain from their faces. Harker cackled, deftly swapping a dagger between his hands.
"It's amusing you say that, when you're the one that was tricked so easily." Said Harker. "I don't even know what you're so upset about. Isn't this what you wanted Prince Kuon? To take revenge on those fools that call themselves nobles?"
"Not like this!" yelled Kuon, boiling in anger and humiliation. There had been a plan tonight, to hit the carriage of a certain advisor. One that had been tormenting Kuon for the past month. But something hadn't felt right. He'd beaten the truth out of one of the men, learning he had been double crossed. Dried blood cracked under his knuckles as his fists tightened.
"You know what happens to people that try to control me." Said Kuon. "It's the last mistake they ever make" He drew his sword, pointing it at the group as magic hummed around him. He didn't need light magic to deal with these maggots.
He wasn't sure who attacked first. What he did know was that a few moments later, he stood alone, among a smattering of fallen bodies. He rubbed his face with the back of his hand, smearing the blood across his face. He couldn't help smiling at Harker who was now cowering in front of him, cradling a broken wrist.
He advanced on the man, raising his sword.
"Kuon stop!"
Someone grabbed his wrist.
Kuon glared at Rick, his only friend in the palace. The older man was still trying to restrain him, face screwed up in desperation.
"Don't kill him, he can't fight anymore." Said Rick.
"He's a traitor." Spat Kuon, yanking his hand free. "I'm just speeding along his sentence."
Rick stumbled back, then took two quick steps to block Kuon. The prince glared at his friend.
"Move." He growled.
"Kuon, stop, this isn't you anymore." Said Rick. "This is taking it too far. You can't keep going like this. It's going to tear you apart."
"A little late for that." Said Kuon. He moved to walk around Rick, but the man side stepped him. He took a step the other direction, and was blocked again.
"Don't make me hurt you." Said Kuon, gripping his sword tighter. "I'd rather not fight you."
Rick's expression hardened, then slackened. He slowly drew his sword, pointing it at Kuon, eyes strangely blank. "If that's what it takes to stop you, then I will."
Rick attacked.
The two clashed, Kuon pushing Rick back. Kuon wasn't the better fighter, but his sheer anger pushed him to past his limit. He relished the ache in his body, the fire in his blood. The group of "friends" he had though understood him had betrayed him. Rick, the one person he was sure would always have his back had turned against him. He wanted to hurt everything around him.
Something flickered in his vision.
He jerked to a halt, eyes widening.
A tall dark creature stood in the room. It wore a long black cloak that shaded it's face from view. The fabric extended to the floor where it ended in a mist that hung around the whole creature. Goosebumps erupted on Kuon's arms at the sight of the creature, a vileness entering his heart.
A sword swung in front of his face. Kuon barely managed to get his sword up in time. What the Hell! Was Rick actually trying to kill him? The thought stirred his anger again, something else swirling with it.
Kuon roared, pushing aside Rick's sword as he stabbed towards Rick.
The man moved quickly, dodging as he thrust forward as well. Kuon realized his mistake a second later, he had been too hastily. Ricks sword was going to run him through!
A hair's breath away, Rick's sword moved. It moved, and Kuon's blade sank into the man's stomach.
Kuon's blood froze
No, no no no…
Kuon quickly sank to the floor, setting Rick down.
"Rick! Rick, oh gods this can't be happening." said Kuon frantically. "I didn't mean to- I thought you were going to block it." Damnit, why hadn't he learned how to heal with magic! His hand pressed clumsily over Rick's wound, warm slick red seeping through his fingers.
Rick suddenly yanked on Kuon, pulling him close. His eyes were wide, determination shining through the haze of pain. The grip on Kuon's wrist was so strong it hurt. He opened his mouth, trying to speak. He coughed instead, body spasming.
"Rick, stop, you're going to be fine." Said Kuon, unsure who he was trying to consol. "It's going to be alright. You're going to be fine." He had to be.
The grip on his wrist suddenly slackened, then fell, leaving behind a red print. Rick's eyes dulled.
He was gone.
Kuon couldn't move. He just stared at the red print on his wrist, a weight heavier than the world pulling him down.
"Well, that went better than expected."
Kuon's glare could have killed. Harker didn't seem intimidated, struggling to his feet. The crystal dagger in his unbroken hand was glowing strangely with darkness instead of light.
"Harker!" Growled Kuon. "This… this is somehow your doing. I'll kill you!"
Harker gave a shrug. "I don't deny it." He said. "But remember, you are the one that held the sword. You are as guilty as I am."
Kuon staggered to his feet, blood pounding in his ears. One desire was drowning out everything. To kill the man that stood before him.
"I can grant you that wish."
That specter from before stood beside Kuon. It slithered around him, it's voice dark and enticing.
"That dagger." The monster said. "It's what controls me. What forced me to control your friend, to attack you. If you take it from him, you will be the one with the power to change the world."
Kuon didn't need to be told twice.
The roar that left his mouth was raw, primal and filled with his rage. He left his sword behind, lunging toward Harker as a spear of magic appeared in his hand. Harker held up the dagger, black magic swirling into a shield to block Kuon.
What a pathetic attempt.
The shield shattered. The man was blasted back, the dagger flying from his hands as the magic rammed into his chest. Kuon didn't notice the man hit the wall with a crunch, sliding to the floor to never rise again.
Kuon stepped calmly forward, a strange darkness swirling inside of him. He picked the dagger from the ground, eyeing the item. It felt strange. Like an untapped power was sealed within. His grip tightened around the blade, the sharp edge slicing through his skin.
"Good." Called the specter next to him. "Now, what is it that you wish for?"
"Revenge." He said softly. "The power to hurt those that hurt me."
Kuon couldn't see beneath the cloak, but he could feel the smile beneath the specter's hood.
"Then I will grant your wish."
Blackness began to crawl around him. He felt something shift, something being torn away. Kuon grunted, pressing a hand to his chest. It felt heavy, cold. For the first time since this mess had started, he felt a sliver of fear. What had he just done?
It was too late to turn back. He could feel the darkness swallowing him, engulfing him in the embrace of his rage. He closed his eyes, ready to fall and stop feeling.
"Prince Kuon!"
Kuon's eyes snapped open. Through the haze, he could feel something. Something bright reaching for him. It hurt. Burned him with its presence. He could feel it clashing with the new darkness swirling inside of him, trying to push it back.
"Please, don't… fall… ind yourself… me!"
That sweet voice called to him again. He reached for it, numb, not understanding anything.
"Your resistance is futile!" he heard the specter jeer. "He has already fallen!"
Kuon squinted through the haze, sensing the dark creature. It was pressing against the light, trying to snuff it out.
A surge of protectiveness shot through Kuon. He shifted the grip on the dagger and dashed forward. Without so much as a tug of resistance, the blade slashed through the creature. The specter melted away in the air.
Threads of light spun together, snapping into a strong cord. Kuon gasped as his vision suddenly cleared, flooding him with a thousand senses.
His whole body was shaking uncontrollably, sweat dripping from his forehead and blood from his hand. He stood in the middle of the room surrounded by bodies of both the dead, and the nearly so.
A shriek rang in his ears.
Kuon turned slowly, eyes widening as he saw a woman he recognized stumble through the room. Tina, Rick's fiancé.
The woman flung herself at Rick's body, tears pouring down her face. A cry of grief rang out from her. It was the single most horrible sound he had ever heard in his life. A cry that he would never forget.
She smoothed down Rick's hair, calling for him to come back. To return to her. She noticed the sword still lodged in his stomach, recognizing the decorated blade. Then those eyes were on him. Agony and anger swirled within those red rimmed eyes. Another thing he would never forget. The pain her saw in her.
"You!" she shrieked. "You killed him! You murderer!"
The dagger fell from his hands. Her words registered, flooding him with the truth. The facts that sat before him. He suddenly saw the horribleness of what he had surrounded himself with. The pain he had been inflicting on himself and others. It was crashing down on him all at once. The realization of what he was. Of what he had done.
Kyoko's eyes fluttered open, thinking her dream - her nightmare - was what had woken her up. Then she noticed the tent was empty.
She sat up, the blanket sliding off her shoulders as he rubbed her eyes. Where was Kuon? She got to her feet, grimacing at the pain that awakened at her movements. There was only so much medicine and magic could do for their many injuries. She grabbed her cloak, pulling it around her like a blanket as she exited the small tent.
The stars still shone strong in the clear sky, well past midnight. Their little encampment was pressed aside a rock shelf, shielding them from the wind and prying eyes. She spotted a dark figure sitting on a rock that jutted out farther than the others.
Using small magic enhanced jumps to help her climb, Kyoko ascended carefully. She marveled for a moment how she could use magic to assist her in little things like this. Just a couple months ago, she wouldn't have had the control, let alone when she was still injured.
She reached the small plateau, taking a seat next to Kuon. He looked a little better than before. They'd both cleaned themselves up, each sporting several bandages and simple clothes provided by their supplies. Kuon was looking out into the endless sands, hand cradling the relic on his wrist. Small cracks gleamed in the starlight, less than a hand's width long. She reached out, placing her hand on top of Kuon's.
The contact seemed to alert Kuon to her presence. He glanced at her, then at their hands. The cracks didn't expand, but they didn't recede either. They just stayed there, constant. A physical representation of Kuon's current emotions.
"Couldn't sleep?" said Kyoko.
Kuon grunted. "You?"
"I woke up because you weren't there."
He went back to staring out toward the sands, his gaze unfocused. Despairing.
Kyoko removed her hand, gaze turning to her lap. Ever since they had left the palace, Kuon had been distant. Distracted. There was an impenetrable bubble of darkness around him that seemed to rebuff light.
Kyoko knew that by becoming an accursed, there would be some differences in Kuon's behavior, but she couldn't help her unease. Her fear that her presence wasn't doing anything to help.
That's what it was. Thought Kyoko, placing a hand to her head. She had just remembered the contents of her nightmare; Kuon going on a rampage because she had failed to stop him. To pull him out of the darkness. She had a feeling this would becoming a reoccurring nightmare.
"Are you in pain?"
Kuon was looking at her. His body was turned, only a slight change in his blank expression. A small crease in his eyebrows.
"No, sorry." Said Kyoko. I was just worried I wouldn't be enough to help.
Kyoko removed her hand, pushing aside her self-doubt. She had to stop being so selfish and thinking of only herself. She wasn't the only one in pain.
"Were you thinking about Rick?" she said.
He'd told her the whole story. What had happened five years ago when the palace was attacked. She'd listened without saying anything. Watching as he recounted the most painful memory he had. It had nearly broken her heart. He hadn't wanted her to comment, he'd just needed someone to listen, so that's what she'd done.
The crease on Kuon's forehead deepened, but he didn't answer her question.
Kyoko licked her lips, thinking of what she was going to say next. Of the thousand things she still wanted to say to him.
"I think…" said Kyoko slowly. "I can kind of understand what you're feeling right now."
"What do you mean?" said Kuon, a tightness in his voice. No doubt he was feeling offended that she would claim to understand the feelings of guilt and pain he had experienced.
"Rick loved you Kuon." Said Kyoko. "He was your friend, someone that looked out for you when you were going through your toughest times. You know now that during the fight, he briefly broke the control of the relic. He chose to let you kill him rather than kill you. He chose to give his life up to save yours."
Kuon kept staring at her, waiting patiently for her to continue. Kyoko shook her head with a grimace. "Knowing that doesn't make it any better." She continued. "It doesn't help to heal the pain of losing someone because of your own faults and weaknesses. You blame and hate yourself for your actions and not being able to stop it. I know this, because it's how I feel about Chiori."
Kyoko swallowed to clear her throat. She hadn't thought much of Chiori since the catacombs. It had been a conscious decision to keep her from breaking down while she was trying to help Kuon. But now, sitting outside with time to think, she could feel her original grief creeping in.
"She still had so much she wanted to accomplish." Said Kyoko. "She was finally going to make peace with her father. Live her life as a woman again. Try to make her father proud of her own accomplishments…. Now that will never happen because she gave her life to save mine. She chose to take that split second to save us instead of herself."
Kyoko didn't know why Chiori had done it. Maybe it was for her job. Maybe she wanted to save the queen and Kyoko was just an extra. Or maybe Chiori had cared for her and did it as an act of love. It didn't matter, because the result was the same. Her life was gone, and Kyoko was partially to blame.
Kyoko blinked the tears from her eyes, trying to clear her vision.
"I've agonized over that moment again and again." She said, voice thick. "Wishing she had just managed to jump away. That I had acted quicker or that maybe if I had found her first, I could have saved her. No matter how I replay the scene in my head, it doesn't change the outcome."
Kyoko reached out again, folding her hands over the relic on Kuon's wrist. Over the relic that covered the imaginary print left behind from Rick. There was a slight burn from the dark magic, but it didn't bother her. She clasped her hands firmly with Kuon's turning her eyes to him. She could see her pain mirrored in his face.
"They are gone Kuon." She said. "But not completely. They live on through us. Our lives are no longer our own. Everyone we've met and lost has become a piece of us. A part of who we are. We must live for their sake, as well as our own."
Kyoko reached up, placing a hand on the necklace she still wore. Though she knew the story of the crystal aster had been a fabrication, she still found comfort in. In the decorated sapphire on her neck. It represented not one, but two men in her life that she loved.
"This is what I came to understand when I was younger." Said Kyoko. "With your help, Ren. I was able to move forward after my father's death."
"You're right, it is similar." Said Kuon slowly, eyes on the necklace. "But it is not the same. Chiori's death, your father. They were not a direct consequence of your actions. Of your sins."
"Ah…" Kyoko let go of his hand, using it to rub the back of her neck. "I guess… you're right. Sorry for being presumptuous."
Stupid Kyoko, she thought. She had been insensitive to Kuon and his memories by claiming to understand them. She wanted to help Kuon, not become a hindrance.
She felt a soft pressure on her head. It was Kuon. He had placed a hand on her head, stroking her hair softly.
"Even if they're not the same, the guilt is." Said Kuon softly. "I'm sorry for your friend Kyoko."
Kyoko sniffed, blinking tears from her eyes. His comforting words and hand grounded her, allowing her to grieve more openly. She closed her eyes, leaning against his side. His hand continued to stroke her head, fingers combing through her short hair. She clung to the contact as she allowed herself to cry for Chiori and everything else that had happened.
The tears slowly dried, and she stayed there for a few minutes longer, breathing in the desert night air.
The hand in her hair suddenly paused. She glanced up to see Kuon's expression had changed. A small spark of determination shining through.
"Thank you, Kyoko." Said Kuon. "You're right. I have to continue fighting, not only for my own sake, but for everyone else as well."
Slowly, very slowly, a small smile pulled at his lips. She recognized it. The same beautiful smile with the aura of a fairy. It was a smile of true hope and happiness.
Kyoko sat up very suddenly, startling Kuon. He was now staring bewildered at Kyoko, who was sporting a very goofy grin.
"You finally smiled." Said Kyoko happily, pressing a shaking hand to her chest. It felt so good to finally see that expression on his face. She hadn't realized how heavy of a weight it had been until now.
"Is… that such a surprise?" said Kuon.
"I'm just really happy to see it." Said Kyoko. "Because I haven't seen you smile since the curse took you..."
Kuon's eyes widened. He apparently had been unware of the fact. Then slowly, another smile pulled at the corners of his mouth. A small, yet heavenly one filled with a calm warmth.
"I didn't notice." He said. "It does make sense though. I can sense the malice and evil in the world much more acutely. Things like happiness are harder to feel." His smile slowly faded. "I can only smile like this because of you Kyoko."
Kyoko's own smile faltered. She couldn't help indulging in the swell of joy at his words, knowing that she was the one that was able to make him smile. If she could have focused on that feeling of satisfaction, she would have been able to ignore the other feeling creeping in. The dissatisfaction knowing that she wasn't the one he loved.
It was hard to feel happy when his sweet words held no deeper meaning than of friendship.
She took a deep breath, her smile trembling.
"I'm glad to have been able to assist you Prince Kuon." She said. She would persevere in her quest to bring him light, even if there was someone else more qualified for the task.
Kuon was now frowning. "You're doing it again." He said.
"Doing what?" said Kyoko.
"Making me worry about you."
"How?"
He pointed at her. "You used my title. You do that when you're lying and hiding your feelings. What is it?"
Kyoko grimaced, looking away from him. "It shouldn't be too hard to guess prince Kuon." She said. "I am after all, a human with filthy emotions that corrupt my pure heart."
Kyoko wanted to kick herself for her selfishness. There was someone out there that would have been better at providing Kuon with light. She shouldn't be so petty, being happy with his compliments. Kuon needed every option possible to keep him from losing control, and she had ignored their biggest asset. The girl whose very memory served to combat the darkness inside of Kuon. The girl he was in love with.
So far, I've failed. Thought Kyoko. I should have found out who he loved and made her come with us. Not that there had been a lot of time during that attack. Still, she should have done something.
"I'm sorry Kuon." She said. "I shouldn't have been so selfish and found her for you. Tried to convince her to come."
"What are you talking about?" said Kuon.
Kyoko peered up at him, feeling miserable. "I uh, might also have been keeping a secret from you about a second identity."
Kuon raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything. Kyoko took a deep breath, readying herself for his anger.
"Remember the chicken you talked to in the clinic?" she said, plowing forward. "I wasn't really trying to deceive you. Well, maybe I was but that's because I didn't like you at that point and-" she swallowed. "Anyway, I'm sorry for not saying anything but… That girl you were talking about. The one that you love… I should have found her before we left."
Kyoko hung her head, her insides twisting in shame. An undeniable portion of her discomfort originated from the intense jealously she felt towards the faceless women Kuon loved. The relief she felt at being the one to come on this journey. Kyoko hated how these ugly emotions changed her into such a selfish being.
"Kyoko." He spoke her name softly. There didn't seem to be any anger in it.
She finally looked up. His expression was twisted in pain. Why was he upset? Was he sad she had been so selfish?
"When I changed." He said slowly, with obvious effort. "It was if the world was coated in blackness. I was angry. So angry at those that attacked me. I lashed back without thought. It was maddening how everything around me refused to die. To fall to my hands."
She blinked, then looked down. Kuon had laced their fingers together. She was unsure if he meant to comfort her, or himself. She wasn't even sure why he was telling her this, but she listened closely. His gaze hadn't wavered from her face.
"I was lost, remembering everything that had happened when I made the contract." He said. "Then something changed. A small blue light appeared through everything. It irritated me. I tried to push it away, but it came back again, and then again… And then I heard someone call my name. My real name."
Kyoko's eyes widened. His real name? What was he…
"Ren." He said softly. "You called to me Kyoko, and asked me not to leave. My anger finally stopped, then diffused. The light expanded to revealed this." He traced the necklace around Kyoko's throat. The one he had given her. The one that reminded her of a crystal aster and Ren. "Kyoko. You are the only one that could have brought me out of that rage."
Kyoko's mouth was dry, moisture trapped behind her eyes. She was trying so hard not to read between the lines, to stop herself from jumping to impossible conclusions. There was no way that she could be the one – No! she had to stop that train of through lest it destroy her.
"Your highness." Said Kyoko, her voice hoarse. "I'm not sure what you meant to imply, but surely you can see how I could take that the wrong way. If you say things like that, I can't help but hope..." She had meant to scold him, but her words came out more like a plea.
The hand near the necklace lifted upward. He brushed his knuckles against her cheek, his eyes a swirl of emotions. Fire had erupted through her at the gesture, no doubt coloring her entire body crimson. He had moved closer now. So close she could feel his breath. She was moving closer as well without realizing it.
"It is more than a hope Kyoko, it is a truth." He said. "Though I can't promise to bring you light as you bring it to me, I can promise I will never stop loving you."
The gap disappeared, and Kuon kissed her.
Kyoko's eyes closed, tears leaking from the corners. After all her painful experiences and loses in her life, she was not ready for the sweet contentment that filled her at that moment. It washed away her pains, cleansing her soul and filling it with nothing but comfort and safety. She wanted to stay in this moment forever, drifting away in perfect bliss.
The kiss ended a second later. Kyoko still had her eyes closed, unable to remember what his lips had felt like. She was still too overwhelmed. Still wrapping her head around the knowledge that she was the one Kuon loved. That someone, anyone loved her in that way.
"Kyoko?"
Kyoko shivered. He said her name so softly. She could hear his feelings for her in that voice. He was currently tucking strands of hair behind her ears.
She finally opened her eyes, staring back at a slightly concerned Kuon.
"What do I do Kuon?" she said.
His brows knitted together in confusion.
She resituated herself to her knees, peering at him earnestly. "I don't know what to do with these emotions." She explained, her cheeks pink. "I'm so happy. I almost can't believe it."
She suddenly jumped up, just missing Kuon's chin with her forehead. She hadn't noticed he was going for another kiss. Instead she started pacing, freaking out as she waved her arms about in an attempt to explain how she felt, because there was no way he could love her. But she trusted him not to lie about this because he knew better than that so it had to be true. Her insecurities were coming out in a garbled mess as she tried to get a grip on what she was feeling.
A sound brought her out of her rant.
Kuon was hunched over, his body trembling. The color drained from Kyoko's face.
"Kuon?" she said, hurriedly kneeling beside him. Was he hurt? Was something happening with his dark magic?
Then she heard a snort.
"Eh?"
He was laughing at her!
She glared, watching as he peaked at her, a hand covering his mouth as amusement danced in his eyes.
She gave him a sound smack on the shoulder.
"Ouch."
"There's no need to laugh at me." She grumbled, humiliated.
"I can't help it." He said, finally uncovering his mouth. The smile wasn't as wide or mischievous as she had come to expect, but it was still there. "You're really cute when you ramble."
Teeth clacked together as Kyoko clenched her jaw in an attempt to stop herself from smiling like a fool. This playboy! How he could so easily say those types of things without a moment's hesitation was beyond Kyoko.
She grumbled, trying not to be happy from his teasing words.
Kuon sat up again, no longer laughing. She peered up at him as he lowered his face closer to her own, one hand planted on the ground for support. Their noses were almost touching.
"You're thinking I'm a playboy again, aren't you?" Her red face gave away her thoughts. "I don't do this with just anyone Kyoko. Need I remind you of my feelings for you?"
She opened her mouth to reassure him that she most definitely remembered. Then paused.
"I wouldn't oppose to a reminder…" she trailed off.
Kuon's eyes widened a fraction, before they colored with something else. A smoldering that she recognized.
This time when he kissed her, Kyoko remembered exactly what it felt like.
End of arc 3
Thank you all so much for reading and your words of encouragement!
I am going on another break.
There are three things that must be done before I start this back up again. One, is to finish Lock and Key. Two, is to write the second part of Life Force. (That one's for you cleocat333. I know how it's killing you.) Third, outline the next arc. Then I shall return! Keep an eye on my profile for a date.
Btw, I hope that was enough Shin/Kanae for the next good while. Who knows when they will be reunited again.
OniPrincess, to answer your questions, I don't believe in spoilers, so I shall let you continue to speculate about what the next arc will contain! XD I can't be sure about the length of the next arc since I haven't written the outline, but it will (hopefully) be about the same length as the others. (We just finished arc three). That being said, there is a ton that has to happen, so get ready to sprint at the gate. The next arc will be posted here in this same story. No bouncing between different fics. As for where I got the idea for this story… kinda hard to say. It's a mix of different stories I've had in my head, inspiration from other books/movies, as well as lots of help listening to a writer's podcast on how to develop and write stories. Plus, my Im0ut0. She does more than she takes credit for in regards to helping me think through the plot.
Haha, yes for the few that have mentioned it, I promise that when I write a book, I will make an announcement here so you all can go read it. :D
keiXseth : "are both Kuon and Kyoko will travel to Kyoko's hometown?" I can't answer that because I'm not 100% sure.
For everyone else, if you have any questions, make sure to log in when you review or PM me so I can answer you before the next chapter posts.
Watch my profile for the date when it starts coming up. (It will be a few months more than likely. Sorry!)
Thanks again everyone! I hope to see you all again in a few months!
-Blushweaver
Aww what a cute chapter. Hope ya'll enjoyed this crazy crazy arc. Maybe I will get some writing done in Blushweaver's absence…. Hmmm.
Also, I feel that Shin and Kanae need a shipping name. Any Ideas?
Rejected titles: "Dis is da Chapter Where Day Kissu." "The Parting of the Ways." "You Never Help me With your Stupid Titles."
-Im0t0u