Tump!
"Crap, good throw," I applauded with begruding credit, giving a light clap. The lizardmen on the opposite team were grinning like the crocodiles they were, happy to be beating the human at his own game. What was that game you might ask?
Cornhole, an age-old pastime in my family. The game of drunks, though we were unfortunately lacking in booze today.
Todone was on my team, we were running the two of us versus the two of the lizardmen. I was starting to get a tired of the glares I'd been getting from the village, so I'd decided on introducing a game or two from back home to try and warm them up. And to be honest, it was a way for me to get a bit more friendly with the locals and get them to see me in a better light. It was a simple enough concept, epoxy shut a few apple-sized sacks filled with sand and carve a couple of boards out from a fallen tree, and the game was more or less set up. It seems to be growing on the lizards, though the more stubborn ones are loath to admit it.
The 'referee' tallied up the points the opposing team scored and we picked up the bags, put us at nine-six in the lizardmen's favor. Lucky bastards in my opinion. As the bonfire continued to crackle and enlighten our game for the many spectators we had, I readied my aim and decided to give them a lesson.
Fwump!
Fwump!
Tump!
The grins on their faces were wiped off by my two holes and a board landing, something I decided I didn't wanna spoil with words. I simply settled on a grin of my own with a light chuckle as our spectators gave their various appraisals of my tosses. Of course, then Todone started throwing his bags. The first two missed, the poor boy was still getting used to the game, but the third one landed on the board at least… only to slide off the board and take my sandbag with it. I huff at that, but I'm at least satisfied that we got six points that round. While the points are getting tallied up by the ref, Todone begins to chit chat with me.
"It wouldn't kill you to miss every once and a while," He said.
I scoff. "No fun in that. I warned them in advance that I had a lot of experience with this, they wanna challenge the master to a beat down, they'll get one".
"I didn't mean that," He interjected.
"Then what did you mean?"
"You're making me look bad,"
I chuckle heartily at that, and wince at the hole made on us.
"Y'know, the point of a game is to have fun and relax Tody. Honestly, if it isn't sparring you're practically allergic to enjoying things".
"I simply find it more suitable than throwing packs of sand at a piece of driftwood. Especially when facing off against them," He told me in a hushed tone at the end.
We start to pick up the bags for our turn now, and I can't help but want to ask the toadman something. "Alrighty then, other than sparring, what kind of games do toadmen play?"
That question takes a moment of consideration from the boy before he gives an answer.
"I don't know actually"
"You don't know?" I ask, tossing my bag salvo only to get two board thumps and a miss. "Like, no Tag or Hide-and-Seek?"
"I was always more focused on training, growing as a warrior to challenge for the position of chief so that I could guide our tribe forward. I'll… admit that I have much to learn it seems, thanks to you".
"Damn, all work and no play," I muttered, internally praising the landings Todone made with his bags. "That had to have been boring as hell man".
"It wasn't all bad. I do genuinely enjoy combat, and there was no short amount of sparring partners in my village"
"Still, a little variety would be nice," I comment, crossing my arms and watching the opposing team pick their bags up. "We're at… fifteen-fourteen in our favor, right?"
Todone nodded, to which I gave a small nod of my own. "Righty then".
"What was your life like in your home village, Nolan?" The toadboy asked.
"It was… life," I spoke dryly. "We had food and a roof over our heads most days, though my mother certainly didn't mind spicing that up every now and then. Wasn't the best of childhoods, but considering it's what made me who I am, I wouldn't trade it for nothin' at all".
Another thump and a swoosh, putting us at fifteen-seventeen lizardman favor. Damn, this is going closer than I thought it would.
"What was your mother like?" The toadman asked innocently enough.
"That's… not something I can easily answer in public," I tried to explain. "My mother was what many would call a grade-A… nah, I can't even say that, kids are in earshot. Point being, she made me her little yes-man, and when I got old enough to move away from her and think for myself, that's when the illusion I was showing myself started to fade".
"That doesn't sound like something you should be saying about your mother…" The boy said with confusion on his face.
"She wouldn't have earned herself a bullet point on my list of people that royally earned my grudge otherwise," I muttered darkly. "Look, uh, can we change the subject? This is starting to roll down a path I don't wanna touch at the moment. We can talk about it later if it still bugs you".
There's silence between the two of us, myself content to keep playing and Todone not sure what to say. Eventually, after a couple more back and forths of the game in awkward silence aside from small talk pertaining to the game, our conversation drifted towards lighter topics.
"So how's the training going?" I began to ask. "I know that you've been helping rake in a little extra food for the lizardmen".
"Trying to," He said with a brief grimace. "It seems as though none of them are too keen on eating insects, unlike yourself".
I laughed at that. "Some folks are just squeamish I guess".
"We're right here you know," One of our opponents called out.
"Alright, maybe you can answer then, why do you guys not like eating bugs?"
"Do you eat bugs human?" The lizardman asked, to which I gave my warm reply.
"Hell yeah man, I could sizzle you up a mean plate of Shearjaw sliders if you'd like! If you'd prefer something more snackish though we could do crickets!"
There was a look of disbelief on his face. "Alright, prove it then! Show us you can eat insects without going sick!"
Just as I was about to answer, it seems as though some unlucky cicada wass zipping by, landing on a tree. I pointed to the bug.
"See that little guy?" I asked, getting a nod. "I'm gonna eat it right now".
There was a brief wave of disgust, but much of the crowd was also intrigued to see the human do something that, from what I can gather, most humans don't do here often either. I walk up to the tree carefully, and cup my hands around the noisemaker to keep it from flying off. Closing my grip gently, I wrapped my fingers around it and held it in my hand for all to see.
"Now the trick to cicadas is unless you've got a recent molt, their shells are normally pretty tough, so what you do is…" I begin, plucking its wings to prevent escape before pulling the head off to kill it quickly. "... is you remove the wings to keep it from flying away, a part of the shell to get to the juicy insides such as the head, then…"
I bring the bug up to my mouth, slurping its nutty flavored insides. I licked my lips of any remnant juices and held the empty shell up in my palm. "... you just suck the meat right out".
There was baffled silence among the lizardmen, some of them looking to one another as if to confirm what they saw me do. Then, one of the lizards spoke up, being followed by more murmurs from the rest of the crowd.
"Well, if the human can do it…"
"By the ancestors, did he really just…"
"I wonder what they taste like…?"
I can't help but smile, glad to share the snack idea with them. It'll help them hopefully stave off starvation too, in case the fishery doesn't fully work out. Some of the lizards still seemed squeamish at the idea, but on the same note they may not have much of a choice when hunger strikes.
"Now, you'd preferably want to eat most bugs cooked, but cicadas and certain grubs are a notable exception. Nevermind the bigger species I've seen roam the swamps and forest alike, smaller ones like waterbugs, crickets, spiders, june bugs, they're all just as good to eat as any other if you cook them right. I should note that most bug species have a particularly nutty taste, and the crunch to some of them can be off putting at first. If I had to suggest it, I'd try one of the bigger species first to work your way from the… squeamishness of it. I'm even willing to show y'all how you can cook 'em up"
I want to walk back to the board and continue our game, but it seems as though they aren't quite willing to let me go just yet.
"Which one would you… recommend first?" A braver lizardman asked.
Something tells me this is gonna be a minute.
Quite a bit longer than a 'minute'. We'd ended up completely canceling the game in favor of a new game called 'Ask the Human'. And boy, did it drag on. At first it was bug related, mostly on how to best spice and compliment them with sides, but then it devolved into what else we could eat. I'd even brought up a couple of the local plants as well as cambium and sugars. It seems as though Zaru was an outlier when it came to the things he ate with us, if the apprehensiveness and curiosity is to go by. Something tells me that the old man has a bit of a story to him. Bah, that'll have to be for when I see his ass next.
Now things were winding down, all of us just chilling out around the fires and talking. Turns out being a human that eats all kinds of weird shit makes for a hell of an icebreaker. Who would've thought? At least some of the villagers were finally warming up to me, seeing I probably wasn't about to sell their kin off or nothing.
I was pan-frying some grubs in a pan with a bit of fat and local herbs to flavor them up, eager to dish them out to the others to try. As much as I love eating bugs, eating them live definitely isn't recommended for first timers in my opinion. As I rotated them over the fire as evenly as I could, I noticed one of my 'volunteers' nervously gulp as he stared at it. No worries friend, with me here you won't be getting a bad first time. Getting some Shearjaw meat would be nice, it'd probably remind these guys of their home if tey ever ate shellfish, but that's not gonna be doable tonight. So, we settled on finding some grubs, before they changed their minds about bugs. Not a bad starter in my opinion. If we were in a drier part of Tob I would've gotten some grasshoppers or crickets instead.
"Now there's a difference between tree grubs and soil grubs," I began to explain. "Tree grubs have hard, sturdy mandibles perfect for boring their way into the wood, and as such you need to be carefully not to bite down on that part"
Todone nodded at that, frying up his own pan of water beetles. "He is correct. Though we toadmen do not need to worry about such things, you will. I would suggest pinching the jaws off before consuming them, unless you are content to swallow your meals without chewing"
The lizards cautiously eyed the food we were prepping up. Had to get this just right to get them hooked, otherwise we were gonna have to bank on the fisheries almost entirely for food. Surprisingly a lot at stake for a few meals.
"Now normally I'd suggest something that goes well with the bugs themselves. I've found that beer usually compliments some of the nuttier tasting bugs, but for grubs you'd want to think of something that would go more well along the lines of chicken or scrambled eggs. Maybe a nice cider along those lines. Buuuut we'll just have to do with a simple drink of tea for that"
"Do some of these bugs really taste like… chicken?" I heard one of them ask, to which I shrugged.
"Some do, some don't, the unique thing about eating bugs is that a lot of them have their own unique flavors and textures that you can't quite nail down perfectly, and even then some people taste things differently even when eating the same bug. I've noted that the Shearjaws of the forest have a flavor reminiscent of crabs or shrimp for example"
Our diners took a moment to look at each other at the mention of the sea food before looking back at me. "Truly?"
I laughed at that with a shake of my head. "You'd have to try to know for certain. If not that, then maybe some crayfish. They're kinda like little swamp lobsters themselves"
Though nervous, there was also some excited chattering at that now. Huh, so they do have some experience with eating something with more than four legs. I pull the pan off the fire and gently divy servings up on wood plates, Todone doing the same with his now. With an additional pinch of seasonings for the finish, I hand them over along with a pour of freshly brewed willow tea.
"Careful now, it's still hot," I warned, hoping that the lizards avoid burning their tongues.
Now was just a manner of waiting on their reactions. With the plates in front of them, a new wave of apprehensiveness reached them, some of the crowd watching on in curiosity. This would be the deciding factor of whether or not we could give them what they needed in the days to come. Famine or no famine, that is the question.
Gingerly, one grub was plucked up with a claw, the lizard eyeing it warily. It seemed to last for an eternity as he stared at it like it was the difference between life or death. Which it kinda was, even if he didn't know it. He growled, shut his eyes as he pinched the head off, and tossed it into his mouth with a chew.
A second chew.
And a third.
He was quiet, his eyes slowly opening and unreadable. He grabbed another grub simply and repeated the process, tossing it into his mouth. Eventually, he swallowed and licked his lips.
"... It does taste like bird?" He asked, more to himself in disbelief.
The others followed suit, cautiously eating their own fillings before their eyes almost froze to process the flavors on their tongues. Then all at once, they all dug into their plates, popping off heads and tossing the grubs into their maws.
"It's unexpectedly juicy and chewy, almost as if they were a berry but made of meat!" One of the lizards practically cried out, getting a nod from his neighbor.
"The spices, I recognize the scent from some of the local plants. To think we were so wary to use those…"
I chuckled at that. May have been slightly nervous at first, but I'm glad for the outcome now. Didn't expect this day to turn into a cooking show, but it is what it is I suppose. Todone brought his plate of water beetles up, something even I haven't actually had before. Mostly because they were too difficult to get my hands on back home.
"Alright folks, anyone else up to try some different bugs?" I asked.
That received significantly more appraisal from the crowd, even the children. I chuckled and grinned, glad to have gotten them hooked.
The party was settling down now, as that's what it had devolved into. Todone and I worked with some of the women to cook and fry up various things I wanted to introduce, including some of the greens. Those didn't get as much of a good reception as the bugs did though, but I'm at least glad that they liked it enough to consider foraging for it. The crayfish though… that really kicked off. Some of them suggested we do the same for those like we did for the fish. Thank God too, I would have been disappointed otherwise.
Most of the party was more games of cornhole and chatting while we all slaved away over the cooking flames, but I didn't mind for one. They knew who was cooking things up for them, and they all came by for various degrees of thanks and respects. At the very least, things went from 'interested' to 'friendly'. There were still a few that didn't quite want me here, and I spotted those three jackasses from earlier, but other than that everyone's been nothing but kind now.
I was actually in the middle of showing them another game from back home, checkers. Names were adjusted for the sake of tribal ideology, but it was basically the same. If the paper production continues at the rate it is, I could probably show them card games after this.
"So, once the piece reaches the other end of the board, he is declared 'War Chief'?" The young lizard boy in front of me asked.
"Correct. Now, the piece can move both forward and backwards as you please, though keep in mind the prior rules as well"
The boy nodded. "It seems simple"
"And it is. Nowhere near as complicated as the game of Chess, something I'd be willing to teach if I had the appropriate pieces carved out for it. There's another version of this game as well called 'Chinese Checkers' that's played with six players on a six-pointed star. If I had the time, I'd even carve a mahjong set for everyone to try out"
Ah, games. One of my many escapes growing up. Whether it was playing solitaire with a worn out deck of Uno cards or turning my modeling clay into a mockup of the 'Civilization' game I'd watch my mom play the few times she was sober, I'd have all kinds of fun. Even made a couple games myself, but those would need a lot of paper to write out all the rules and then I'd have to teach mathematics, make dice, and try to explain to them the concept of 'Roleplaying'... Even made an adjusted version you could play with yourself. Yeah… I didn't have a lot of good friends growing up, and what few I did were more keen on different things.
"So, now that you all know the rules, maybe you could try it against each other?" I asked the small group listening in on my showing of another game.
They all took up some pebbles, simple enough colored stones with pieces painted and marked different colors to signify sides of the field, and I was content to let them play as they may. I took a moment to sit beside them just to make sure there wasn't any misunderstanding of the game, before getting up for a stretch. Despite the fact that I was enjoying the attention, I excused myself from the crowd before walking out into the latrine part of our area to do my business. With a zip and a sigh, I relieved myself into the pit.
Despite the little hiccup I had this morning, tonight turned out to be a pretty good night.
Nolan Potts, Human (Karma: 50 [Neutral]) [17/21 Spell slots used]
Classes: Brawler (5), Ranger (3), Druid (4), Clothier (3). Total Level (15).
Spells (Druid): Frostbite, Entangle, Create or Destroy Water, Guidance, Jump, Cure Wounds, Dust Devil, Protect from Poison, Hold Person, Spike Growth, Lesser Restoration, Water Breathing, Darkvision, Sleetstorm
Spells (Ranger): Animal Friendship, Speak to Animals, Ensnaring Strike
Gear: Canvas Clothes (Sturdy, Weathered), Oak-Handled Brush-hook, Canvas Coyote Pack of Holding, Bundles of Herbs (Medicinal), Bundles of Smoked Bug Meat, Bone toolkit
Items of Note: {Humble Beginnings}
Party Members are as follows…
Member One: Todone, Son of Kodrotti, Toadman (Karma: -25 [Neutral])
Classes: Toadman Warrior (9), Brawler (8), Total Level (17).
Member Two: Crusch Lulu of the Red Eyes (Karma: 50 [Neutral])
Classes: Awakened Elder Blood Lizardman (1), Druid (6), Spirit Shaman (3), Summoner (1), Total Level (11)
AN: Alright, just barely managed to scrape this one out before bed. Good thing too, most of these chapters I only ever write in one sitting for the sake of not botching them halfway through. But yeah, the big two-oh. Yet another milestone among the list of stories I've written.
Accountless Fan: I've actually got something planned for next chapter pertaining to that, you'll see it then