Deer Diary Chapter 9: Year 5 Part III, a harry potter fanfic

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter series.

Reasons Why I Hate James Potter

1. He always runs his fingers through his hair

2. He is ugly inside and out

3. He is mean to Severus and he's a childish bully

It took a little while, but eventually the Marauders began to sit next to each other again. They eventually began to talk and talking turned to jokes and laughter until little by little, the Marauders became a family once more.

They were happier together, Lily noted, but James had still remained distant.

This whole year, Lily didn't see too many pranks by the Marauders and the only times James flirted with Lily was when she approached him or was near his vicinity. He had stopped seeking her out and had stopped with his grand, romantic gestures.

In fact, when James asked her out now, it was almost out of habit or a sense of duty. He was James and it was part of his personality to ask out Lily Evans. He just had to do it to maintain the façade of normalcy.

At least that was how Lily viewed it because nobody else seemed to think anything was wrong with the raven-haired boy.

James seemed angrier. Crueler. There was a cold darkness under his warm hazel eyes.

She didn't know what to do about it. There wasn't much she could do. After all, she and James barely had a relationship. They had talked their fourth year and Lily realized how James felt about her, even if she didn't reciprocate, but now, it felt like James was pulling back from her.

It's not that he didn't care for her anymore, but it felt half-hearted, as if he had other things on his mind.

All those feelings, those pent-up emotions, and darkness… it all exploded on that awful day.

Although the day was over now, the memories of it kept replaying in her head non-stop. At the moment, she was sitting on the hill outside. The sun was setting and she was all alone. She had only brought a blanket and a thermos of tea to accompany her.

The few sounds around her were that of crickets and the wind and the terrible echo of the dreadful day.

She ran outside just in time to catch the last of the terrible bullying.

James had cast an Impediment Jinx and began to choke Severus with a Scourgify charm.

"Leave him ALONE!" she had shouted.

James had then proceeded to ask her out. This time, same as the past times this year, the flirtations were far from romantic. It was teasing. It was… cruel.

He was cruel.

He was a bully and he had always been a bully. She berated herself for trying to believe anything other than this fact.

This show he was putting on was beyond heartless. It was vicious, inhumane, and downright merciless. He was a terrible human being and his cold-blooded actions were beyond anything he had ever done before.

She tried to look at Remus, and ask, 'This is your friend you so wholeheartedly defend?' She tried to look at him to understand what was happening, but he refused to look up from his book. Sirius was no help either for he was laughing along.

She and Severus may have had their differences in the past, but she would not stand by and allow her oldest friend to suffer.

"What's he done to you?" she had asked.

Back and forth she and James had argued and James and Severus had fought.

Severus cast a spell that left a bleeding cut on James, James cast a spell that hung the Slytherin upside down, and Sirius cast a petrificus totalus to protect James. Back and forth.

It was too much.

It was all too much.

"You're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus—"

"I don't need help from filthy little mudbloods like her!"

Everything that came after was a blur. He was sick. He was sick. He was sick. He was terrible. He was a monster. He was a bully.

In that moment, Lily didn't really know if she was thinking of James or of Severus.

He was just reacting to the situation he was in; he was being bullied. But then he called her—that. How could he? After he promised he wouldn't.

Lily tried to prevent the tears from spilling. She clutched the warm thermos of tea in her hands breathing deeply.

He betrayed her after he promised he wouldn't be like them. After he promised he wouldn't practice such dark spells.

The spell he used on James... That was dark magic. James had used spells they had learned in class, but the spell Severus had used didn't come out of a textbook. It was self-taught dark magic.

How could she have ever been friends with him?

There was a silence once more as the thought settled in the deep pit of her stomach.

She didn't know how long she stayed seated like that. The sun was low in the sky and Lily couldn't find it in herself to go back into the castle.

There was a small shuffle from behind her and a quiet voice said, "Evans."

She clenched her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut until she saw spots. "What you did back there," she said with a simmering heat that hadn't fully boiled over, "That was cruel and heartless."

"I'm sorry," James Potter apologized.

No, Lily thought. He had no right to apologize now.

"I can't believe you would actually do that. I thought you were better than that. I thought—"

"Well, you thought wrong!" James exploded loudly. "That's me: James Potter, resident toerag and asshole who can't do anything right."

Lily stood up immediately and turned around to face him. He had no right to yell at her after what he did. She was the one who was mad. "How dare you—"

"I'm so fucking sick of you supporting him," James roared, "That fucking asshole called you that terrible name and you are still here defending him!"

"I'm not defending him and I am not supporting him, but might I remind you that you were the one to start the fight!" Lily walked up to him and poked him in the chest accusingly. "You were the one to provoke him and you were the one to—"

"You think he's innocent?" James took a step forward, which caused Lily to stumble a step back.

She widened her stance defensively and stood her ground. "No, I—"

"He and his gang were the ones to practice dark magic on the first years," James said darkly. "Or did you miss that part?"

"I— what?"

"They're experimenting on the first years! That spell he cast on me?" James pointed to the fading scar on his cheek. "They did this and much worse to some Ravenclaw kid just the other night."

"I didn't—"

"Of course you didn't know," James spat out. "Because you're blind to all the terrible things your precious Snivellus does for this Death Eater friends. Who do you think is creating all these dark spells and teaching them? He's not just on the outside, Evans, he's in the fucking middle of it all."

She knew he was right. She had spent way too long in denial.

"Why didn't you report it or- or tell someone? Dumbledore or McGonagall? They could have done something!" Lily tried to reason, though her defense started to sound weaker and weaker.

"They could have done what exactly?" James asked mockingly. "Assign them detention? Have them scrub the floors? They're purebloods with parents who have all the power. Nothing would happen except have those people they bullied be tortured even more. It's not that fucking simple and you know it."

The two of them stood there facing each other nose-to-nose with clenched fists and red faces.

Lily was the first to back off. She let out a shaky breath and sat back down on the blanket she was on before James had confronted her. With her back to James, she waited for him to make the next move.

He did. With a small sigh, he said, "I'm sorry I did it. I'm sorry I hurt you and I'm sorry he hurt you."

"You don't have to apologize for him," Lily said shortly, still fixing her sight ahead and not on the boy behind her.

Lily heard a sniffle and a shaky breath. If there was anything she learned this year, it was that everyone had baggage— even popular, perfect Potter.

"Sit next to me," Lily said softly.

James was hesitant, almost like he didn't believe she had suggested that until Lily moved to the left side of the blanket and patted the empty space beside her.

Still weary, James sat at the very edge of the other side and left plenty of room between himself and her. Once seated, the two of them still didn't make eye contact and Lily didn't really know what to do next.

After a few more minutes of tense silence, James rubbed his face harshly which drew out the tears that had been building up.

"Fuck." James dug the heel of his palms against his eyes to prevent any more tears from spilling. "I hate dark magic."

She finally turned to look at him and took in his worn out features, now more prominent than ever. "Tell me what's wrong, James."

James let his head drop, his chin almost touching his chest. He confessed, "That day when Sirius and I were turned into little kids was probably the best day I had this whole year."

He used a hand to rub the back of his neck before it went up and clutched his hair. He pulled harshly. "I still remembered all the shitty things that happened, but it just seemed less… like it wasn't dominating my life. I was just a kid who could play outside and everything was okay because the adults were handling it."

He turned to look at Lily for the first time since he sat down. "Do you realize in two years, we'll be the adults? Adults are supposed to know what they're doing and they make the right choices and… and everything works out in the end. That's how it's supposed to be."

"Sure," Lily reasoned, "But we still have time to figure things out."

"They don't."

"What?"

"They don't have everything figured out. They're as clueless as we are. And they don't have time to figure anything out because they'll be gone." By the time James finished his last sentence, he had a line of tears falling from his eyes.

He wiped them away with the back of his hand. Lily scooted closer and hesitantly placed a hand on his back, rubbing gentle circles.

"Who will be gone, James?" she asked carefully.

James clenched his fists hard, leaving half-moon shaped marks on his palms. He hid his head back into his knees and began talking. "During our fourth year, there was a Death Eater attack and- and my dad was on the frontlines. Everything was fine. It was supposed to be fine. After the attack, the remaining Aurors were cleaning the ruins and my dad should have gone home. He was injured and they cleared him to go home. But he stayed with his team and there was this dark object. It was a cursed item that was left behind as a second attack."

Lily stilled the hand that rested on his back as her mind reeled with shock. This was not what she expected he would say.

James let out a shuddery breath. "Apparently the first attack was too easy, so this was the plan all along. Nobody knew it was cursed. But my dad had touched it and the magic was able to get into his blood."

"After they cleaned the site, my dad came home and greeted mum and… it was only a few hours later that they realized it was cursed and called my dad back to the office and ran the tests. He was cursed and there was no cure and- and then my mum collapsed and we found out that it had spread to her as well…"

"The spell they used to curse the object was a weakening spell. It was made to be infectious and was supposed to weaken all the people within the vicinity, but since my dad was the only one near it and touched it, it had just affected him and then he came home and spread it to mum."

"My parents spent weeks in the hospital under quarantine. I wasn't allowed to see them and I couldn't even talk to them since they were so weak. The healers tried to break the curse and find a way to counteract it, but it was a newly created curse. Nobody even knew how it worked."

"James…" She didn't know what to say.

"They finally got released from the hospital and now they're bedridden. I can only see them when I cast a covering spell and I can never touch them. Most days they can't talk. They just lie there and… it's like I've already lost them."

"James, I'm so sorry. I didn't know."

"They don't have much longer." James looked dazed, the words he tried to keep inside finally spilling out of him. "I don't think they'll last the summer."

"Oh, James." Lily felt her own tears slipping down her face and reached out to wrap James completely in her embrace.

James hesitated for only a second before wrapping his arms around her and hiding his face in the crook of her neck. His whole body began to shake with sobs and Lily continued to cradle him close to her heart.

"I can't remember the last time I hugged her," he cried softly, his words muffled on her skin. "And now I never can."

She realized he was talking about his mum.

Lily's heart broke for James.

She couldn't imagine losing her parents. Especially in such a terrible way.

He was losing his parents to dark magic.

James was silent when he let go of Lily. He wiped away the tear stains, but it did little to change his exhausted image.

"I didn't mean to tell you all that," James admitted softly.

"I'm glad you did. I—"

"I don't want your pity," James interrupted. "What I did today was cruel and terrible and awful. You were right and I shouldn't have done that to Sniv- Snape."

"James…" Lily said.

"Have a good night, Evans." He stood up, albeit a little shakily. "I'll… see you around."

She waited a few minutes, giving James the space he so desperately wanted, and then she also stood, packed her things, and began the trek back to the dormitories.

She thought everyone would have been asleep by now, but as soon as she opened the door, she was bombarded by the energetic Alice, who began discussing the love note Frank had sent her during Charms.

While she babbled, Marlene took in Lily's blank expression and the fatigue that had begun to set in.

"Lily," Marlene said, interrupting Alice's spiel, "Are- are you alright?"

Lily Evans was there for everyone. She was there for Severus. She was there for Sirius. For Remus, Regulus, and… and now James. People laid their burdens on her because she listened and she cared.

But she was so tired.

"No," Lily admitted. "I'm not alright."

She felt so numb, she didn't even realize she had moved until both sides of her bed dipped and Lily found herself in the middle of her mattress with Alice and Marlene curled up on either side of her.

"When Alice feels sad, she likes to talk about it," Marlene said on her left side.

"And when Marley feels sad, she just likes the company," Alice said on her right.

"Which would you like, Lils?" Marlene asked.

Lily felt her breath hitch and more tears fell silently. "Just the company, please."

The mattress wiggled as the two girls on either side simultaneously snuggled closer to the red-haired girl, the warmth of their bodies providing a comfort Lily had not felt in a long time.

It didn't take long after that for her to fall asleep, but before she did, she heard the murmur of Alice and Marlene's conversation when they thought she was completely asleep.

"Do you think it was about what James and Sirius did to Snape at that tree?" Alice whispered.

"Of course," Marlene whispered back, "What else would it be about? Snape called her that."

"James was pretty terrible too," Alice said, her voice growing even lower as she started to fall asleep.

"Yep," Marlene agreed.

"Like really terrible."

"I know, Ally."

"I can't believe you actually have a crush on him," was Alice's last teasing remark before her snores began to fill the room.

Marlene's "oh, shut up," was heard by no one.

"So I heard what happened yesterday," Regulus mentioned nonchalantly.

"So did the entire school." It was Lily's turn to stare out the window of their dim lit classroom. It was another full moon and another night of patrolling on her own.

"I heard Severus tried to apologize," Regulus continued. He appreciated the time he had with Lily Evans. Even though it was always late at night so no eavesdropping ears could listen in, he looked forward to the time she had for him.

"He tried," Lily said passively.

"I'm guessing you haven't forgiven him yet?"

"What makes you think I ever will?" Lily snapped, her green eyes flashed dangerously and Regulus fought the urge to jump out of the way of her glare.

"I- Well, it's just that you—"

"Yeah, you're right," Lily bit out, "I always do forgive him for all the bullshit he does and I always try to justify it, but I'm done. I'm done with him and I'm starting a new slate."

"That's goo—"

"No more Snape. No more Potter. No more drama!"

"No more Potter, huh?" Regulus asked wryly.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Tell me," Lily insisted.

"Potter's a prick," Regulus began. "He's always been a prick."

"What's your point?"

"You've always been sweet on him," he stated matter-of-factly.

"Wha—?" Lily looked like a gaping fish. "I have not!"

Regulus shrugged. "You always turn him down and insult him—"

"Exactly!"

"—But it's always in jest. It feels like banter most days." Regulus made a strange face. "Well, except for yesterday."

"What's your point?"

"I don't understand what's so great about James Potter." Regulus crossed his arms and scowled.

Under the pale moonlight, he looked years younger than he already was. A petty child with pouted lips.

"Jealous of Potter, are you?" Lily teased.

Jaw dropping, Regulus shook his head. "No! Why would you even say that?"

"I'm done talking about Potter and Snape. Let's talk about something else," Lily changed the topic easily, letting Regulus cool down. "Are you going to Hogsmeade next week?"

She thought the change in subject would help the kid relax, but instead, he looked tenser than ever. "No, uh, I… maybe. Are you?"

Lily shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know. I'm not really in the mood to go out."

"You shouldn't go," Regulus said, his voice becoming strangely grim. He held eye contact with her for a second longer before shaking his head. "I just mean… Hogsmeade is pretty boring anyway and- it's just a waste of time, so…"

"Yeah, I guess." Lily blinked at him. "It can get a little repetitive, but Zonko's Joke Shop always has a new product out which is pretty exciting."

"Why would I like that?"

"I was just—"

"I'm not him, you know. I'm not my brother. So if you're only talking to me because you think that I—"

"I don't think you're him," Lily interrupted. "And thank Merlin for that. I don't think I'd be able to handle more than one Sirius Black. But," Lily hesitated, "you are a lot more like him than you think."

His response was fast and to the point. "You're wrong."

"For starters, you're both incredibly stubborn and funny in your own weird way. You both have bizarre sleep schedules. But at the end of the day, you're both good people."

"That's not true."

"Sirius is good, Reg. I know he can seem hard-headed and mean at times, but his heart is in the right pla—"

"I'm not a good person." Regulus got off the desk and stood to his feet. "I'm going to bed now. I do have a bizarre sleep schedule. I should probably work on fixing it."

"Wait, Reg—"

He hesitated at the door. "Hogsmeade isn't worth it… Good night, Lily."

Alone in the empty classroom she let her head drop and sighed. She could never say the right things.

The rest of her week consisted of classes, silent patrols, eating, sleeping, and lying in bed dreading her inevitable doom.

"Enough with the gloom, Lily Evans!" Alice's voice did nothing to get her out of her funk.

Curled up under her many fluffy blankets, Lily gave her friend a non-committal grunt before rolling over and wallowing on her other side.

While Alice's voice may have done nothing for Lily, Marlene grabbing her by the ankles and pulling her off her bed certainly woke her up. Now a giant heap on the floor, Lily curled up and sighed against the fuzzy carpet.

"You gotta get out of this funk, Lils." Marlene insisted. "Come with us to Hogsmeade."

"No," Lily said petulantly. "It's boring."

"You're boring," Alice corrected. "We've watched you lying there every single day this week for hours. You need to get out and get a life. We get it. Snape hurt you. Frankly, we don't really know why you were friends with him in the first place. Now you have us and we're not going to let you waste your precious youth grieving over an asshole who was never really your friend in the first place."

Lily stayed silent, her face and body hidden under the protection of the blankets, which Alice and Marlene had thankfully not pulled off of her.

"Plus," Marlene added hesitantly, "Alice is gonna be sneaking away from me to go on a date with Frank and I will be all alone."

"I told you I'm gonna set you up with someone and we can go on a double date!"

"Merlin, that's even worse!" Marlene cried out, "Lils, you gotta save me!"

They waited a few more seconds and when Lily gave no sign of reciprocating, they resignedly turned to leave their dorm.

There was a small shuffle and Lily's head poked out of her blanket cocoon. "Can I help pick who you set her up with?" she asked Alice timidly.

Marlene groaned good-naturedly. "This was not what I meant when I asked you to come along!"

Alice squealed excitedly. "Two birds, one stone!"

"What about him?" Alice pointed.

Marlene squinted at the boy. "No."

"Him?" Lily asked.

The blonde scrunched her nose. "Ew."

"That one?"

"Never."

"Marley, you have to find at least one of the boys here attractive!" Alice exclaimed.

The three friends strolled through Hogsmeade, window shopping and boy shopping.

"I already told you, Ally. I don't need you to set me up with anyone and Lily's here so I won't be third-wheeling on your date with Frank!"

"But—"

"No buts. Let's just have fun and not think about boys. Boys are garbage."

"Amen," Lily agreed.

"Except Frank," Alice said dreamily. "Frank is so sweet."

"Thanks for the compliment, babe," Frank's voice came from behind them and they turned to face him.

Alice giggled and jumped into her boyfriend's arms to give him a quick kiss. "I missed you, babe."

Marlene gagged. "I wish I could miss this."

"I think it's cute," Lily said, smiling at the couple.

"Not as cute as my little bubblegum," Frank said, rubbing noses with his girlfriend.

"Merlin, they're getting worse." Marlene rolled her eyes, but even she had a grin on her face.

"I brought you something." Frank reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of Droobles blowing gum. "I know you were on your last stick."

"Aw, babe, you know me so well!" She placed a kiss on his cheek before unwrapping a stick of gum and popping it in her mouth. She then looped her arm around Frank's, looking ready to go on her date.

"Alright, babes," Marlene mocked. "You two have fun on your date. I'll stay here with this babe." She looped her arm around Lily's to mimic Frank and Alice.

"Bye, babes." Lily winked at the couple.

Alice stuck her tongue out at her friends before she and her boyfriend started walking onwards.

Once they were gone, Lily turned back to Marlene. "So you really don't like anyone at the moment?"

Marlene kicked a rock and sent it flying down the paved path. "Nope."

Lily chuckled. "I had the weirdest dream one night that you were into Potter."

"What?" Marlene choked on her spit. "No… that's crazy."

At her reaction, a realization dawned on Lily. "Oh, Merlin. It's actually true, isn't it? You like Potter?"

"Shhh!" Marlene dragged her away from any stray ears to a part of Hogsmeade that was less crowded. "And no, not really!"

"You do! You actually do!"

Marlene relented, "Okay, fine. Maybe just a little. But I wasn't going to do anything about it," she swore.

"Why not?" Lily asked confused.

It wasn't like Marlene to hide her feelings. She was out there, with a boldness and confidence that Lily admired. Marlene oozed confidence.

"Well," the girl grimaced. "Cause you and James have that thing…"

"Me and Potter? We most certainly do not have a thing!"

First Regulus and now Marlene. Why did everyone assume she and James Potter had a thing?

"Alright, fine, there's nothing going on between you and James," Marlene said, not sounding entirely convincing.

"Exactly," Lily pushed, "which is why you are going to ask him out today."

"I— what? No!"

Luckily they were near Zonko's where she knew James and the rest of them spent a majority of their time. Lily barged into the shop her eyes landing on her target. "Oi, Potter!" she exclaimed, dragging a red-faced Marlene with her. She noticed the lack of companions beside him. "Where's the rest of them?" she asked.

"Remus and Pete decided to stay back at the castle and Sirius is checking out the newest flavors of stink pellets," James explained, nodding to the back of the store where his friend was.

"Flavor?" Marlene said, mostly to herself.

"Hmm?" James said.

Marlene blushed, not realizing she had spoken out-loud. "Oh, um, well, you said 'flavor of stink pellet', but it's not like you're eating them."

"You don't know that," James bantered, which caused Marlene to giggle. James looked pleasantly surprised at her reaction to his lame joke.

Lily couldn't hide her cheesy grin. "Potter, ehm… Marlene, here, was wondering if you would join her for a butterbeer."

Marlene elbowed Lily discreetly. "With- with all of us," she corrected with a strained smile. "Lily, you, me, and, um, Sirius."

James cocked a brow. "Oh, um, alright. Sounds fun. Let me check with Pads first though."

He left the two girls to tell Sirius about the change in plans and when he was out of earshot Marlene groaned. "That was embarrassing. I was such a stuttering mess."

"No, it wasn't!" Lily encouraged. "You were flirting and everything. You totally have the hots for him!"

"First of all, we already established that and second, don't ever say that again."

"Is it hot in here or is it just your passion for Potter?" Lily fanned herself dramatically.

"Girl," Marlene threatened exasperatedly, "I will end you."

"Do it," Lily challenged, wagging her eyebrows. "Then it will just be you and Potter on your very special date."

"And Sirius," Marlene added as she watched the approaching figures come closer.

"Ready to go?" James asked, returning to the girls with his best friend.

"McKinnon," Sirius said with his normal flirtatious tone.

"Black," she returned with a similar flirty voice.

The two of them began to walk ahead, seemingly blind to everything else. Lily noted curiously how comfortable Marlene was with Sirius, when, like she said before, she was a stuttering mess around James.

She and Sirius seemed to know each other quite well, and were even physically affectionate towards each other. Lily watched as Marlene tried to reach up to bat him on his head and how he pretended to duck and cover from her hand.

Wondering if Marlene and Sirius had a history she was unaware of, Lily made a mental note to ask her about it later.

With Marlene and Sirius walking ahead, it left Lily and James trailing behind awkwardly. This was not what Lily was expecting when she tried to set her friend up with James.

"Listen, Evans," James said awkwardly, drawing her back from her musings. "If this is about what I told you that one night… I don't want your pity."

Lily remembered that night as clear as day. The fact that his parents were cursed by dark magic and were now forever isolated from everyone including their own son and they were most likely going to die before James became of age. It was not like it ever truly left her mind.

"Just so you know, I don't pity you and you telling me that doesn't change how I see you. Plus, it was Marlene who wanted to do this, not me. Our wretched rivalry continues."

"Yeah?" James asked, a ghost of a smile on his lips as he trekked forwards. He let his snitch run a bit ahead of him before snatching it back again.

"Yeah."

The four of them eventually found a booth right by the large windows at the crowded Three Broomsticks and settled in. Lily immediately squeezed in beside Sirius, much to his surprise, allowing James to sit next to Marlene.

James gave Marlene a friendly smile which she reciprocated, but when his head was turned, she glared at Lily who winked cheekily in return. That response was met with a swift kick to the shin.

"So," Lily winced, rubbing the spot where Marlene's kick had landed, "quidditch, huh?"

"What do you know about quidditch, Red?" Sirius asked, amused.

"I know some things," Lily defended. She was only trying to find a common topic that Marlene and James shared so they could get the ball rolling.

"How many beaters are on a team?" Sirius tested.

"Two," Lily responded easily. "You and Marley."

"That was an easy one, Black," Marlene teased as she leaned slightly forward. "Lily, how many points does the snitch get you?"

"Uh, twenty?" Lily said unsurely. Alright, sue her, she didn't really know much about quidditch aside from people on brooms throwing things into hoops.

The other three at the table burst out laughing, but the good part was that it did begin a conversation about the recent game between the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff team and the different strategies they used.

Lily tried to pay attention. She really did. But sports were never really her thing and so, her mind and eyes began to wander.

She took in the laughter of students as they shared tales and relished their short break from classes and homework. She heard the sounds of butterbeer mugs being refilled and smelled the lovely scent of pastries to accompany it.

She looked out the window to the absolute chaos.

The windows exploded and the laughter immediately turned to screams. The sounds of mugs falling and shattering to the floor and the smell of fire filled her senses.

Immediately, James pulled Marlene under the table and used his body to shield her from any flying debris. She was the closest to the window and was the one who endured the brunt of the explosion.

Sirius and Lily both ducked under the table to join them. Other students began to follow in suit, finding their own tables and benches, doors and barrels to hide behind.

"What's going on?" Lily asked, panic rising quickly.

Sirius's head poked out and he scanned the area. He took in the running students, the colorful spells, the dark cloaks and white masks. "A Death Eater attack."

"Here?" Lily said breathlessly. "I thought we were supposed to be safe here. Dumbledore was supposed to—"

"It's gonna be okay," James comforted, his arm still around Marlene, "The Aurors should be here soon. This will be over soon." He kept repeating the mantra, if only to convince himself of the fact.

Lily noticed one member of their group who hadn't said a word the entire time. "Marlene," she asked, focusing her attention on her friend.

Marlene blinked at her owlishly and raised a shaky hand up to her temple where a trail of blood fell down the side of her head.

"Oh," Lily's eyes widened. "Oh, no."

"The glass and debris cut her head," James muttered, his arm still around her. Lily noticed how heavily the girl leaned on him, as if she couldn't keep her head up. She kept blinking sluggishly like she didn't really comprehend what was going on.

The yelling never stopped. The screaming never stopped. The running. The spells flying. The crashes. The blasts.

"Keep her still," Lily instructed, trying not to let her voice go shaky. "And don't let her close her eyes."

James nodded, swallowing roughly. "We'll just wait it out and we can get her to—"

A voice filled their minds. A hissing that they could feel inside their head.

"Join my cause and you will be safe."

Marlene whimpered and shuddered under James's hold. The blood continued to spill, tracking in thick rivulets down the side of her face.

"Join my ranks and none will be harmed."

Sirius and Lily leaned even closer to each other and Sirius held her hand. She curled into him and felt a tear fall into her hair as his chin rested on the top of her head.

"Join me and you will be rewarded."

The voice of Voldemort permeated the air and his presence silenced everyone with terror. The screams stopped only to be replaced with sobs and choking breaths.

She didn't dare imagine the damage outside. The wounds. The deaths.

"It's going to be okay," James whispered, sounding less and less sure each time the words came out.

There was a whooshing noise of a door swinging open and a haunting chill filled the Three Broomsticks.

From her view, there was a rustle and then the trail of a long black cloak. Lily could see his feet as he walked by and right behind was his slithering snake, Nagini. Lily tried not to flinch as the snake made direct eye contact with her before turning back to follow its master.

"Is anyone ready to join me and begin a new life?" Voldemort's voice came out loud and strong. He was not just in their heads. He was there in the pub, only a few meters away.

"Anyone?" Voldemort's voice repeated, sounding almost amused, as if he were entertaining children. "Perhaps if I demonstrate what would happen if you don't join me, you will change your mind," he said thoughtfully. There was a moment of dead silence and then, "Crucio."

She didn't know who was screaming. She didn't want to know who was making those terrible, terrible noises.

Sirius squeezed her hand tighter and she let out a soundless sob. She prayed this was a nightmare. A terror she could wake up from.

With a determined look in his eye James said, "Lily, take Marlene." He tried to gently move the girl into her arms. "I'll try and—"

"No," Lily whispered. She immediately reached forward and grabbed his arm preventing him from leaving their cover under the booth. "No. Please."

"He's torturing that kid," James growled lowly. "Do you hear it?"

Another echoing wail tore through the room and Lily flinched.

"I don't want it to be you," she said pitifully, tasting salt from the tears that had fallen.

"What the fuck do you think you'll be able to do?" Sirius hissed at his best friend. "You'll be dead before you even try to cast your first spell. Stay where you are."

James glared at Sirius and the boy was not afraid to return the expression. They remained at an impasse for a moment before James relented, ducking his head. He moved Marlene, allowing her to rest against the side of the wall and rubbed soothingly up and down her arms to keep her awake and calm.

"Where are they?" James muttered and now that his hands were free, he took out his snitch and began to fidget with it. "The Aurors should be here by now."

The screaming stopped and the only sounds now were the aftereffects. The whimpering and the heaving.

Voldemort moved again, his feet tapping on the wooden floorboards and his snake following close behind. He settled right in front of their booth and did not move.

Then their table was blown off its hinges. Casting a silent spell with a casual flick of his wand, Voldemort threw the whole table out the already broken window leaving the four fifth years open and exposed to Voldemort's calculating gaze.

"Hmm," he said pensively, "you were right, Nagini. We have a lot of good blood here." He tilted his head, taking in each one of the kids, his eyes resting on Lily's for a half-second more before ignoring her completely. "McKinnon, Potter," his eyes settled on the white sheep of the family. "Black."

All four of them remained silent, not having moved at all. Lily's mind was completely blank and it was as if her whole body had quit functioning.

"It was a shame what happened to your father, Mr. Potter," Voldemort mused. "He was a distinguished man with an honorable bloodline." The villain gave him a knowing look. "Hopefully, one day you will carry his legacy and continue the pureblood line."

James yelled, standing up to face the antagonist, but Sirius beat him to the punch.

Literally.

Standing there with a heaving chest and a still curled fist, Sirius Black stared down the man he had just punched in the face.

Voldemort wiped his cheek and mouth with the back of his hand and chuckled. "Mr. Black, it's such a shame you act like this when your own family is—"

"Shut the fuck up about us and our family," James snapped. He cast an offensive spell, which Voldemort flicked away without batting an eye.

"You could have joined me and I could have protected you and rewarded you. You would be welcomed back into your family with open arms." Voldemort sighed. "It's always a shame to kill purebloods," he lamented before raising his wand at the boys.

They raised theirs as well as if they stood a chance against the older man.

"No!" Lily cried out. "No, please! I'm muggleborn! Take me fi—"

It only took that second of distraction for a team of Aurors to enter the situation and begin attacking the villainous wizard.

Finally challenged, Voldemort decided to take his leave and disappeared with a swish of his cloak. Outside the broken window, other Aurors had begun rounding up the Death Eaters that had not managed to escape and cleaning up the site of the attack.

"You're safe now," a booming voice called out. "The attack is over. We will be escorting you all back to the castle, but first, anyone who is injured can come out and we will take you to the healer on site."