Chapter 4

An icy wind blew through the town and made me eat my hair. Bleh!

My teeth were chattering and I couldn't even feel my cheeks. They felt like metal sheets and I could barely move my lips.

I didn't think it would be this cold outside! Why is fall so cold! Wasn't that reserved for winter! Why didn't I bring a hat! I should've worn a hat instead of my bow. A part of me wanted to put my arms through the sleeves of the other arm to at least warm my hands a little. But that would make me look like someone from an insane asylum to everyone on the street…

I let out a sigh.

There was nothing to do. It wouldn't be for another couple of hours before dad came home. I walked down the street, just to look at the lawn decorations everyone had put up. It only took five pink flamingos and stupid-looking lawn gnomes before I got sick of it. Isn't there anything to do?

I looked around and saw the park about a block away.

Eh, might as well waste time at the park.

I waved to the apple juice guy right outside the park, though I ignored him when he tried to get me to buy some juice.

I went through the park gates and looked around to see if anyone was around. The only person I saw was a kid that ran past me. He was in a dead sprint towards the sandbox, and when he reached it, he took a deep crouch. Then, he jumped and dove headfirst into the sandbox.

But why, though?

Eventually, he pulled out his head, and sand flew everywhere. If that wasn't enough, he began to hack up sand in a coughing fit that seemed to go on for too long.

Is he choking? Can people choke on sand?

I picked up my pace to go help him, but before I could help him, the boy jumped back up. And then he began to skip away.

I guess he's fine?

But just as I was about to let him be, he turned around on his heel and sprinted headfirst into the sand once more. This is the kind of thing Kel would enjoy.

I mentally named the kid, ostrich kid, and walked past him to the swings. Swings were fun. But the swing was cold today. It was really uncomfortable to sit there, but it eventually warmed up a bit. My legs dangled, and I kicked every once in a while just to move a little.

The park was barren, so I guess I could enjoy the quiet?

Nothing was happening, though. Quiet is boring.

I gripped the chains, flung myself back and faced the sky. A cloud covered sun, so I could stare at the sky without blinding myself. I wonder, could I spot any birds? Have they all migrated for the winter already? Maybe I can find a few if I just check the trees…

I could've sworn I saw a bird near the entrance of the park. As I focused on the trees, I noticed some movement. My eyes checked for a bird, but instead slowly focused on a boy walk down the sidewalk.

He was walking with a violin case around his back, and a small plastic bag in his right hand. He staggered left and right in a super exaggerated manner while stomping on the ground.

Is that kid drunk?

My eyes slowly focused in on the boy's face.

Woah, that's Sunny! What happened?

Oh god, Sunny didn't somehow get his hands on alcohol, did he? Is that what's in the bag?! I need to check! Alcohol is bad, Sunny! You'll become an unresponsive husk that just lays there on the couch!

With a quick tug, I picked myself up and jumped from the swing. I landed with a deep thud as sand splashed around me. Ack! Sand got in my shoes. Gotta remember to empty them later.

I could be wrong, but to be sure, I needed to look in the bag.

I ran closer and closer towards Sunny, but he didn't notice the sounds my footsteps made. Anyone who didn't notice me by now had to be drunk. I can't believe it, he really does have alcohol!

This calls for something drastic! My running pace made my hands super numb and frosty, but they gave me an idea. They were about to get warmer.

Sunny passed the park gates. I slowed down so I could move quietly. With my stealthy tip-toe, Sunny was still completely oblivious. I was ready to pounce.

"Sunny!" and my hands latched onto his neck. Sunny responded by jumping in shock like a startled cat.

"Bwaaah!" he cried.

Sunny turned around and I looked him dead in the eyes.

"Aubrey!" He didn't look back at me, he looked at the ground instead. He avoided direct eye contact! That must be a sign of his guilt! "Get off! Your hands are cold."

My chilly hands will help me shock Sunny! I had to scold him until he swore off alcohol!

"I can't believe you could do this!" I wriggled my fingers. That made Sunny squirm.

"Do what?" He was trying to play dumb!

"You're drinking! What would Mari think! You're only 13!" I was going to have to stage an intervention for Sunny. The TV show proved that they always work.

"No, I'm not!" Sunny's face puckered up. It wasn't like Sunny to lie like this. The boy I used to know was changing.

"Then what's in that bag!" I kept one of my hands on Sunny's neck as I used the other to swipe the plastic bag in Sunny's hand. It was surprisingly light. I opened it to show the evidence. "Look!"

Inside the bag was a colorful square with some writing on it. Err, where was the bottle?

An awkward silence began to pass. There was a niggling thought at the back of my head, as I broke the silence.

"Um, what's that?"

"They're violin strings." Sunny said in a flat voice.

"So… you're not drunk?"

"No! Can you let go of me now?"

And it was like a cold bucket of water dropped on me. Then, I finally noticed the position I was in.

The thing I didn't realize about wrapping your hands around the neck of a boy you know is that… you need to be close to him. I could look into Sunny's (not drunk) eyes, in much more detail than usual. They were a really nice shade of brown. The other thing is that our faces were only a small distance apart and I could feel his breath.

I let go. My hands were finally warm and I could feel my fingers. My face was on fire. It was the cold. The cold made my face red. I screamed inside.

I messed so bad! I want to run away! But it'd be awful of me to do all that without apologizing.

"I'm so sorry about that Sunny!" Please forgive me! I didn't mean to do all that!

"It's fine." Oh thank goodness, Sunny didn't seem to mind too much. I think he's embarrassed for me, his face was red as well... "Though, what are you doing here Aubrey?"

Right. I was at the park alone.

I didn't know how to answer. I can't say I had nothing to do. That's a boring answer, and it would also sound like I was at the park, just waiting for Sunny to come.

"I was, uh," My eyes darted around, looking for something to use for a believable excuse. I remembered ostrich kid. "training my headbutt. So if Kel ever takes Mr. Plantegg again, he won't survive what comes next."

His silence was telling. I could feel my cheeks reddening again. Okay, time to force the conversation along!

"So, what about you!" I begged Sunny with my eyes. Please! Just brush over what I said!

"I was at Hobbeez buying stuff. It's where I got the violin strings." He complied, thank goodness.

"They have violin strings?" Wasn't Hobbeez like, for comics and toys only?

"The shopkeeper has a really weird collection."

I didn't even know violins could break. Wait, does that mean other parts of the violin could break?

"The violin is okay, right?" It'd make me sad if the violin that everyone worked their butts off all summer got damaged. Everyone worked really hard to buy the violin.

"Yeah. It's fine." Sunny murmured. His tone was awfully negative. He must've felt bad that the violin broke. He really shouldn't worry, it was just some strings snapping. I should help.

"Hey Sunny, can I help you fix your violin, to apologize for earlier?" It would beat just sitting around, looking for birds.

"I don't need help to fix it." Dang, there goes that plan.

"Right, you need to go home to practice…" I sighed. Mari could probably do a better job than I ever could to repair it.

"Actually, you can help!" Sunny changed his mind? "Follow me."

He walked over to the swings and put his violin case over his lap. I took the swing next to him as he opened the case and pulled out the violin. I leaned in to get a better look. The violin looked like it was trying to get a tv signal. The strings were all attached to the violin as well. How were you supposed to get them out then?

Turns out there really wasn't much to repairing a violin. Sunny twisted the knubs on the violin to remove the strings. Then he got the new strings from the rainbow square in the bag, and threaded the strings onto the violin.

I held the violin up the entire time. Yay teamwork!

When we finished, Sunny picked up the bow and began to play a few notes.

"Play a song!" I didn't get to hear Sunny play all that much outside of the few times I watched him practice with Mari. I really want to hear what it sounds like.

Sunny looked like he swallowed a bug.

"Pleeeeeeease!" I know I'm being a bother, but I really want to hear what everything will sound like for when the recital comes.

The recital was in just a few days, and I've been super excited about it. Hero was really annoying with how much he talked about how he gets to listen to the two of them play all day! At least Kel doesn't make a fuss about it! Think about how Basil and I feel!

Sunny relented and stood up. He readied his bow and placed his violin onto his chin. He began to play.

It was beautiful.

A song echoed throughout the park. A madder red sky lit up behind Sunny as music poured from his violin. I didn't recognize the song, but it was wondrous. It was hypnotizing. He was graceful as he made his music.

The song wasn't quick, but it wasn't slow either. It made me kind of sad. The melody and the fact the only instrument playing was the violin. I wanted to fill the silence a little, so I hummed along. I didn't really know what I was doing, but it felt right.

Sunny turned to me immediately. Am I messing up the song? It was kind of embarrassing how he stared at me. I almost wanted to shut up, but I was enjoying myself too much to stop.

I closed my eyes so I could concentrate on the violin. I swayed with the beat and I felt myself smiling all the while. The air smelled like leaves and autumn. The only thing I heard was the lone violin and my own voice. I felt my tongue tingle as I kept humming all sorts of random notes.

I followed the violin as best I could, but I messed up a lot. I think I made up with it for enthusiasm, though.

Every once in a while, the violin and my voice would sync up, and those moments were magical. It didn't happen at all at first, but as I got used to Sunny's violin, I harmonized with it more and more.

The violin was like Sunny's voice, and it was singing with me. The sad song from the violin was more cheerful and lively when it mixed with my voice. It was really fun.

A not very good, clashing, completely random duet from the two of us played in the park.

Eventually, Sunny finished his song, and I stopped with him. I gave him a big round of applause.

"You were amazing!"

Sunny hid his face. I think I saw a blush there.

"Sorry if the humming was distracting." Hopefully Sunny didn't find me a bother.

"No, it was… pretty." Oh. Um. Right. He's talking about my voice, yeah. "I should've tried to match you more…"

"No way! It's more fun if you do your own thing as well! You're a lot better than me anyway, so you should sound good at the very least." It'd be awful if Sunny played badly on purpose for me. It wasn't supposed to be serious, so a lack of consideration would be a good thing.

Sunny didn't give me a response. He just put away his violin back into its case and he sat back down on the swings. A silence awkwardly formed between us.

Sunny was moping. Something obviously upset him, I could figure out that much. But what? Was it something I said? Will he talk about it? Would he even open up?

I knew what I had to do. We were on the swings. Sunny usually heard out my problems, now it's time I hear out his!

"Sunny, earlier, you were really upset. What was that about?"

"I wasn't." He tried to close himself off immediately.

"Stop lying." Even after all those times we talked… "Tell me what's bothering you."

"I… just don't want to talk about it."

"That's not fair. I tell you what I'm worried about, all the time. You can tell me, we're friends right?"

That was the clincher. Sunny began to twiddle his thumbs and eventually let out a aggravated sigh.

"I'm not good enough to play with Mari." His head was turned to the ground. "I practice and practice, but I'm not getting any better. It's so frustrating. All I get is to spend less time with everyone on Saturdays, and a bunch of callouses on my hands."

Sunny kicked and swung back and forth. He was barely holding back tears.

"It's miserable to play the violin." He said.

"What? That's… but…"

I wanted to bring up how everyone had pitched in to get that violin, how everyone did all that for Sunny. But, I held back. Sunny wanted someone to understand him, not to force him to do stuff.

"Sorry for making you play earlier then." He must've felt awful being forced to play.

"Don't. I had fun that time." That's a relief, at the very least.

"If it makes you feel any better, I would love any way you play. Everyone knows how hard you've worked."

I know just how much you wanted to play the violin, Sunny. On that Christmas day, when we gave you the violin, we lied a little. We said it was Basil's idea, but really, it was mine. I just had Basil propose the idea to everyone else about it, because, well, it was embarrassing to reveal that I was watching you.

But I saw how you played with your toy violin. I watched you get all sad when you talked about how Mari was busy doing other things, instead of spending time with you. I noticed how you sometimes look at the piano room, wishing you were playing music.

Saying that you hate the violin, that just can't be true.

"Does it even matter if I still sound awful?" He still doesn't get it!

"It does matter! I know it sounds stupid from me, the girl who doesn't even play an instrument, but it should mean something if you've worked for so long! You've poured your heart into playing the violin! Mari knows that too! That's why I love hearing you play it! Don't lose heart! I'll be your fan forever!"

Sunny didn't speak. He stared out into the distance while I recoiled from what I just said. After what seemed like forever, he spoke up again.

"Thanks Aubrey." And then Sunny smiled. Wow. Um. That's really really really cute. I've seen him smile before, but this one felt different.

"You're welcome Sunny." Glad I could help you for once. "So, what should we do now?"

"If I go home, I'm going to have to practice with Mari." Sunny looked away, "Can I stay here a little longer."

"Sure, why not?" And Sunny gave me another smile! That's unfair! That's a weapon! It's a weapon of mass destruction! You shouldn't bring weapons into the park, Sunny!

Did this count as a romantic moment? The teasing from Mari was still fresh in my mind, and I'd be damned if anyone caught us here again.

I checked for Kel, or if anyone else we knew was being a nosy busybody. I checked all around the park and when I turned back to Sunny, he was doing the same thing.

Our eyes met. I looked at Sunny and he looked back at me. We were both worried about the same thing, huh? Sunny began to chuckle, and I laughed with him.

Eventually, we both fell into the same-old routine. We just sat on the swings, making conversation with a bunch of silly conversations about what happened throughout the week.

"I didn't think you'd be able to hum that well. I kinda thought you were tone deaf." Said Sunny.

"What! What would make you think that?"

"I saw you sing at the park with our pets." Ohhhh right. I did butcher that, didn't I.

"Disney songs are impossible." My voice was already kind of husky for a girl's, and their songs want you to go as high as possible. It was a foregone conclusion, no matter how much I tried.

"I want to see everyone sing a song together."

"That sounds great!" Though I'm pretty sure Kel would ruin it.

"We'll be like those caroling families during Christmas." Sunny tilted his head. "Though, we're kinda already like one."

"I know what you mean. Sometimes Hero feels more like a dad than my own dad." I couldn't help but laugh when I pictured Hero with my dad's mustache.

"Kel would be the younger brother."

"Blegh, Kel would the most annoying brother. I don't know how Hero deals with him."

"Kel is fun. And he's great at making friends." That was probably true. If Kel were here, he'd be sticking his head in the sand like an ostrich with ostrich kid.

"Mari is the most adult though. Though, sometimes she gets too touchy." I knew she had to stop exercising after her knee injury. I just didn't expect Mari to still have that much arm strength. Her full-power hug was devastating.

"And Basil would be another younger brother." Sunny said as he nodded.

"Isn't he older than you?" Basil's birthday was before Sunny's by a good three or four months.

"Yeah, but he'd like being a younger sibling more."

"And…" we'd be siblings too. I couldn't bring myself to finish that sentence. It… just felt wrong to say. "Never mind."

But why did it feel wrong to say?

My words hung in the air, and Sunny looked like he wanted to finish my sentence. I hoped he didn't. Instead, he reached into his pockets and handed something to me.

It was a bright red orb wrapped in plastic. Oh, it's candy.

I unwrapped it and popped it into my mouth, and Sunny picked out a different one and popped it into his. It was watermelon flavored.

The air grew quiet, and we began to watch the sunset in silence while eating our sweets. I should really fill the silence, but I was lost in thought. I was in a trance, eating candy, and thinking about the two of us again.

Why couldn't I say we were family?

Well, I already kind of knew why. I've went over it so many times in my head, but maybe I'll get a different answer this time…

I didn't.

I like Sunny.

I've liked him for a while now. I feel fuzzy and happy when I'm around him…

But what exactly was our relationship?

We're definitely closer than normal friends, I know that much. So, would that mean we were family?

What even is family?

Families stick together. Everyone's together, supporting one another, and always being there for the other. But I didn't want to consider Sunny as a brother or something like that.

It sounded great! It should've been everything I wanted since I was little. I finally had close friends that would always stick together!

So why did I want more?! Why can't I just accept what I had!

Deep down, I'm just scared.

What if he didn't like me back? What if he just thought of me as another sister and just couldn't think of me that way? If he rejected me, it would be impossible for things to go back to the way they were before.

And even if he accepted me, and we became a couple…

I would lose the relationship I had now. Closer than friends, further than lovers. It was comfortable, yet cloying at times. It still makes me happy.

If I didn't keep this distance, would it just all fall apart, would everything fall apart?

When they were younger, Mom and Dad used to look so happy in their photos. They told me stories about how they met, and how they were so in love. Now, they both argue so much. Now, all they do is fight and ignore each other. Would that be us someday?

I really hoped Mari and Hero would stay together. I hoped they'd never fight in the future. I hoped their relationship would last forever. The both of them were perfect, the both of them had to be able to make a relationship work.

If I got any closer to Sunny, would I lose everything that I loved about our relationship? The long talks at the park, the ways we greeted each other, all the memories we shared.

Everything I had now and all the things that came with it were just too precious. Spending time with everyone was almost like a dream compared to the days where no one would play with me.

That should be enough, right?

I… didn't want to risk this. I couldn't risk this! I can't change a thing or I might lose it all!

I'll swallow what I felt. And lock it deep inside me.

I was about to swallow the candy, but suddenly, something shook me.

"Aubrey." said Sunny.

He was grabbing my shoulder! He's looking directly at me! My heart isn't ready! What do I do?!

"W-what?" My voice hitched, but at least I replied. Why was he so close?! Augh! My brain was mush! Why did I have to think embarrassing thoughts?!

"It's getting dark. You okay? You were kind of out of it." It's nothing special! It's just a normal thing to care about a friend like that! Stop reading into it!

"I'm f-fine! Let's go back home."

The moon began to rise. The night wrapped everything in a deep shade of blue. Thank goodness. The blue helped hide my red face.

I couldn't look at him anymore. My heart was beating out my chest. I needed to go away and get some space. Why did I have to think about our relationship here and now?! I'm making things so awkward!

There was only one solution to mushy brain: peace and quiet. I'll get that at home.

We walked together until we reached the corner of Sunny's street. I took the time to calm down a bit, so I could finally look at him again. Sunny looked a lot better to how he looked when I first saw him today. But, his hands were locked in a vice-grip around the handle of the violin case.

He must be nervous about going back home. I know that feeling all too well.

"Hey Sunny," I knew just the words to say.

"Yeah?"

"You'll do great." And with the best smile I could muster, I gave Sunny a push, and waved him goodbye.

Oh. The candy finally dissolved into nothing. Only the aftertaste was left in my mouth.

It was sweet.

I opened the door and turned on the lights. Dad wasn't home yet. I passed by the couch and blaring television. I almost tripped on a random bottle. That could've been dangerous…

…

I turned back and put it in the recycling bin.

Finally, I climbed the ladder to my room, and I took a breath of fresh air. I could finally relax myself.

My mind was reset! Time to reflect on what I did today!

Aaaaaand everything hit me like a truck. I plopped myself onto my bed and smothered myself with my pillow.

Okay, if I just take my mind off things, I can rid of this nervous feeling in my stomach!

Sunny spoke a lot today.

He thought of us as a second family and I winced. He didn't explicitly say he thought of me as another sister, but I think he does. How can I even compete with Mari…

I'm thinking about him again. I plopped onto my bed and smothered my face with my pillow. I screamed into the pillow to let out some of the feelings in me. My voice sounded weird.

But Sunny thought my voice was pretty ehehehe…

I need to stop thinking about him! How am I going to make our relationship not change, if I can't even look him in the eyes!

He had really cute eyes that made his face super cute…

Stop it, brain! But my brain didn't comply. I redoubled my efforts to suffocate myself with my pillow. It would be a mercy if it actually worked.

It sort of did.

I started feeling woozy, and my mind began to wander off. It was good that my bed was nice and soft.

There was a white two-story house on a beautiful hill. A pink-picket fence stood out in front, and a wonderful assortment of flowers and plants covered it.

Inside that home was a fully furnished living room and kitchen. There was a lit fireplace that was the perfect temperature, and the kitchen was full of warm chocolate chip cookies. There was even a giant fridge stocked with watermelon and all sorts of food.

Upstairs housed a massive bedroom with an adorable mountain of plushies and soft things. The bed was specially made to be jumped on, and when you laid on it, it was like floating in a cloud.

To the side, there was a music room filled with any kind of instrument. Across from it was a pet room dedicated to Bun-Bun and all sorts of other animals..

The backyard had a massive treehouse and a shiny blue pool. There was also a much larger garden in the back, filled with rows of unknown but charming flowers.

I was there in the living room, sitting on a giant beanbag.

My hair was pink, my eyes were blue, and… I was wearing a ring.

The ring was beautiful. Holding it up to the light just made it glitter all the more.

And then Sunny walked in. He was in a full tuxedo with a rose in his chest pocket and… wore a matching ring on his hand.

Sunny offered me his hand, and I took it.

We stepped outside into the garden. Our faces were lit under a blanket of stars and moonlight, and with both hands interlinked, we began to dance.

We moved with grace. A slow and lovely tune wrapped around us as we danced, but we didn't notice it. We only saw each other.

As we spun and stomped, our faces began to move closer and closer. Just as our lips were about to touch…

"Aubrey! Dinner!" Dad called out from downstairs. That snapped me out of it.

… Dang it.

The bow dragged the final violin note to completion.

I took a deep breath and took my violin off my chin.

"Woah! You improved so much, Sunny!" Mari used hers to lavish me with praise.

"Mmm." My feelings were mixed, Mari had never ever praised me to this extent, but… it was also the best I've ever played, even I knew that. We just played through all the songs in the setlist and almost nothing went wrong. There were still a few small mistakes, but I felt ready to iron them out.

"It was probably from replacing the strings."

"No way! I could hear so much emotion in your violin! That's all you lil' bro."

Was it? I couldn't tell if I sounded differently.

What changed?

Well, I finally had the peace of mind to think while playing. For the last song, I reflected on my relationship with Mari while playing. That helped me make my notes all the more full.

Mari truly cared for me.

But she still tries too hard to be perfect…

"What did you use to bring out the emotions in the song?"

"I thought of us."

"Heh, me too, Sunny." A smug smile plastered itself directly onto Mari's face. "Oh, but the song before that was absolutely perfect. What were you thinking then?"

That song was what Mari called, 'a sap song'. It was chock full with slow notes. It's where a musician can express their feelings.

"Nothing much, I was just in the zone." I lied.

I must never let her know that I was thinking of my biggest fan.

"Hm, it's getting late. You want to stop now, Sunny?"

"Can we practice a little more?"

It was kind of funny. Last night I wanted practice to end as soon as possible.

But now, I want to give her the most wonderful show she's ever seen.

"Sure. Let's go lil' bro."

The duet filled the neighborhood with song that entire night.