Chapter 16: Love Cats

Ranma and Hibari walked to school, sweating in the heat of the Tokyo summer. Early June had been surprisingly cool that year, but almost as if it was anticipating the solstice the next Monday the thermometre was soaring today. Ranma thanked his lucky stars he'd fixed the cat's tongue when he did. The ringing of a bicycle bell provided a momentary distraction from the humidity.

"Nihao Tongzhi!" Shui called out cheerfully. "Shui has borrowed bicycle. Make walk to school shorter."

"Oh. Morning Shui," Ranma managed.

He wasn't really sure what else to say. He did notice Hibari was still treating Shui a bit coldly. He didn't know why Hibari had been acting that way all week, but it seemed like Shui did.

"Have idea for what we do with 'hanging out'. Cologne want open up beachfront booth on weekends. Maybe we go this Sunday, have fun beach day?"

"Ranma just got over that Cat's Tongue nonsense the old mummy put on him. Do you really think he wants to go to the beach with water everywhere?" Hibari asked sharply.

"Oh... Shui not think of that. Tongzhi Ranma can stay out of water though? Maybe?" Shui answered nervously as Hibari glared.

"Are there goin' to be lots of other food stalls?" Ranma asked, sliding himself between the two. He might not know why tension was flaring up, but wanted to calm things down.

"Yes. Very many. Start of summer rush means many restaurants open up stalls."

"Then I can handle going in girl mode," Ranma replied casually, "Easier to get free grub that way."

Hibari looked at him with honest concern. "Are you sure that's okay?"

"Yeah. If I ain't locked I'm fine with it."

"Shui have Jusenkyo powder for Hibari too. That good for beach, no?"

As if to prove a point Shui produced two packets and tossed them to Hibari. Her cold attitude seemed to lighten, bringing a smile to Ranma's face. He wasn't good at building friends networks, and didn't want this one to collapse so quickly.

A pair of redheads were digging through the bathing suit selection of a fashionable Shibuya clothing store. There was quite a lot of angry whispering between the two, but they made sure no one nearby could make out what they were saying. Ranma simply was not going for the more cutesy options Hibari kept offering him. Nor the more revealing ones.

"I think this might be good," Ranma offered, holding up a functional orange and blue one piece. It even said 'Boy' in Latin script.

"No. That's much too boring. I want to wear something cuter."

"I was talking about for me."

"We should wear matching outfits. It would be cute."

Ranma felt his eye twitch. He didn't think he could bring himself to wear anything Hibari felt was a good outfit. Her tastes were simply way too feminine.

"Ooh, what about this? It looks fun," Hibari announced, producing a red swimsuit. It was a one-piece, but the was lacking in fabric to the point it would look like a two-piece from the front. "I do like red... but the sky blue one would go with red hair well."

Looking it over Ranma felt a sudden twinge of mischievousness. It was actually pretty sporty. Sexy, but not super revealing. His pop would have something close to heart attack seeing Ranma in that. And Hibari's old man would definitely have a heart attack seeing the two of them dressed like that. Plus, he would look good, and that would make it all the easier to get his hands on free grub. A smile grew on his face in anticipation.

"This could be fun," Ranma laughed as he grabbed a matching sky blue and yellow set.

Hibari quietly raised an eyebrow. Ranma seemed to be growing rather more open to dressing up. Yet seemed to deny the idea just as strongly as ever while in male form. Her fiancé might be engaging in some unhealthy compartmentalising.

That Sunday dawn was very early. It was after all the 2nd longest day of the year. Ranma grumbled, finding 4:30 an unreasonable time to be awoken by the sun. He decided to just close his eyes and enjoy the calm. As he did he felt a body rub up beside him, and half opening his eyes he registered Hibari's sleeping form. He was going to push the blonde away when he realised that Hibari was not currently blonde. His fiancée had managed to avoid hot water the night before, so the powder induced transformation was still in effect from their swimsuit shopping.

Hibari snuggled into Ranma's side, murmuring something in her sleep and Ranma decided that maybe for once he wouldn't kick her out. Right now she was just a cute girl. And he was a boy. He could pretend that their relationship was normal. That he didn't switch sexes what felt like at least twice day. That she wasn't born with an incorrect body. That he wasn't supposed to ignore the feelings growing between them and somehow find Hibari a girl to fall in love with.

He could ignore all the confusion until the next time he saw her blonde hair at least.

Munching on breakfast after a brief sparring session with Genma left Ranma feeling smug. He'd managed to stay dry and male the whole time, which was just going to make the swimsuit reveal that much more of a shock. The panda across from him meanwhile had had much less luck, and was waiting for the kettle to boil.

As a blonde plunked down beside Ranma to eat Ibari cleared his throat.

"So, I hear you two are heading to the beach today?"

"Yeah, Shui invited us," Ranma replied. Out of the corner of his eye he confirmed Hibari's eyebrows were still red. She was just in a wig.

The mustachioed yakuza boss' eyes narrowed as he stared Ranma down.

"You will make sure Hibari stays out of trouble right? I can barely imagine what he might get up to at the beach."

"Don't worry, I'll make sure he doesn't do anything I wouldn't do," Ranma replied with a smile. "I even talked him into wearing the same swimwear as me."

Ibari smiled confidently. "Good work! Maybe you can make a man of him yet."

Hibari and Ranma both struggled to stay straight faced for the rest of breakfast. After a quick scramble to eat it all the two hurried back upstairs. Hibari had her powder induced form already, while Ranma just needed a glass of water. Once Ranma was physically changed they then slipped on their matching pseudo-bikinis and grabbed a couple towels. Heading down the stairs both were giggling furiously (though Ranma would insist his was a chuckle).

Strolling confidently past the living room where Genma had convinced Ibari to play some shogi the two part time redheads waited for a response. The two stocky men were however deeply engrossed in their game and it was up to Hibari to get their attention by clearing her throat.

"I thought you'd like to see our swimsuits," Hibari announced.

Both fathers turned towards the children they considered their sons and paled in unison. The swimsuits hugged both teens well and the adorable pose the two had taken together furthered the absolute lack of masculinity in their appearance. The shock hit Ibari to the point that he collapsed twitching (and possibly foaming at the mouth it was hard to tell from Ranma and Hibari's angle). Genma effectively turned to stone at the sight. It was only after the usual first aid crew had stabilised Ibari that the elder Saotome found the ability to speak to the pair.

"Ranma... What do you think you're doing?" he asked, fear in his voice.

"Well, I can't really wear a guy's swimsuit thanks to you. So I figured I might as well just go all in."

"And I couldn't have my future husband out girly me. So had to at least match him."

Genma's eyes grew distant, as he seemed to imagine some sort of life and death scene. Under his breath he muttered: "I tried... I really tried... I'm so sorry..."

Ranma wondered what on earth his old man was rambling about when he heard Shui's voice from the front door. The pair of redheads strolled confidently towards the door ready for a day of fun (even if it meant a car ride with Cologne). Shui marvelled at the two for a moment.

"You both look very... what word? Feminine?"

"It's an opportunity for some good fun. And I want to see the Shampoo squirm. She doesn't seem to like me being in girl mode as much," Ranma replied. "So I'll dress the part."

"Hmm... yes... definitely," Shui replied cryptical while giving them both a once over.

There was something in those eyes that made Hibari curious. It seemed like a guilty interest. Hibari realised Shui was Shampoo that would rather suggest Ranma was at least partially wrong about Shampoo's preferences...

Shui gestured to lead them out to the waiting minivan. The pair hastily donned some jelly shoes and headed out. Shui's father sat in the driver's seat and Cologne was beside him. Both looked surprised at the swimsuits the redheads wore. What surprised Hibari though was the third person waiting seated at the side sliding side door with her feet on the ground beside the van.

It was Shampoo.

Hibari's eyes flitted back and forth between Shampoo and Shui, trying to process it.

Shampoo glomped the pair, apparently ignorant of Hibari's slight meltdown.

"You both look too cute," she announced. If Hibari had been more alert she might have noticed the similar glint of guilty interest in Shampoo's eyes. "Shampoo just sad she no can go swimming too. Is needed in kitchen all day."

Ranma just rolled his eyes and sat in the back corner of the van. Hibari plunked herself down in the back middle. Shui slide protectively in the final read seat just before Shampoo could slide in to cuddle her fiancés. The two briefly exchanged a strange look. Blocked from her prefered seat, the indigo haired girl sat in the middle pair of seats, but seemed to have little understanding of seatbelt safety as she set herself up backwards to chat.

Despite Ranma ignoring her completely and Hibari giving only limited responses to avoid being too rude Shampoo rambled most of the drive. Shui nodded off for most of the ride.

When they finally arrived and were parked Hibari let out a sigh of relief. Shui informed them that all hands had to help with some set up still, but Shui would find them later. The redheads decided to head towards the area where most of the food stalls were set up first.

"Hey, why don't we make this a competition?" Ranma announced as they neared the stands.

"What precisely do you mean by that?"

"We split up. Each gets 10 minutes to score as much free food as possible. Then we compare our hauls."

"That could be fun. Do we compare by price or by quantity?"

Ranma paused to think it over for a second. "Quantity. Otherwise we'd need receipts."

"You're on," Hibari declared with a playful wink.

Ranma headed towards the thick of the crowd. He managed his cutest 'please sir I have no money' face at a good three stalls before he felt the need to back off a bit. Plus he had to work out how to hide his haul without any pockets. As he moved to slightly further out stalls he caught a glimpse of Hibari. She was surrounded by close to a dozen young men clearly running a complex sob story. She didn't have any food yet though. Ranma smugly made his way to another yatai.

By the end of the 15 minutes Ranma had managed to bag some yaki imo, a nikuman dumpling, an ikayaki, a taiyaki, and two kyuri. A good haul of savory foods. Hibari appeared a few moments later, carrying a crêpe, some curry rice, a couple takoyaki, and a small okonomiyaki.

"I'll admit, you came close," Ranma declared with a confident grin, "But your technique takes too much build up time."

"Indeed, you certainly won this round sensei," Hibari replied with a dramatic bow.

Ranma laughed as he munched on the dumpling.

"How did you get so good at that so fast anyway?" Hibari asked. "You've only had the curse for what, three or four months now..."

"I was an adorable kid. Was easy to play the 'cute scared child' routine and get a buncha free eats. 'Course with the ponytail I had some people think I was a little girl from time to time. Which was awkward."

Hibari began giggling at that. Especially with Ranma's currently lovely figure.

"Oh yeah, laugh it up pretty boy. Anyway, it was disappointin' when the routine stopped working at like age 11. Puberty an' whatnot really ruined the effect."

"Puberty..." Hibari half hissed under her breath.

"So it's a silver linin' to the curse. Got one of my favourite pastimes back. It was weird havin' my voice 'un-drop' though... Speakin' of: what's with your voice? I swear it actually gets deeper when you're using that powder."

Hibari blushed a bit as she swallowed a mouthful of crêpe.

"Well... I can stop pushing my voice up when I'm like this."

Ranma tilted his head a bit and raised a red eyebrow.

"I realised my voice would probably drop some day when I was about eight. So I talked my dad into letting me take singing lessons. He wasn't sure about the idea, but I managed to get Tsugumi on board so he gave in. Using that training I learned how to raise the pitch of my voice. When I'm like this though I can just talk normally."

Ranma nodded a bit. It did make sense. He'd somehow never clued in that Hibari's voice should have dropped at some point. Suddenly he was very curious what Hibari's natural voice sounded like.

"You! The perverts!" a vaguely familiar voice called out.

Ranma and Hibari wondered what that commotion was about, but didn't want to get involved.

"You two crossdressers!" the voice continued, "I've learned the truth! I'm here to free Shampoo from your cold dead hands. I formally challenge both of you! We shall settle this like men!"

The redheads both turned around to see Mousse standing there. His shaved head made him look quite comedic. Neither of them had time to laugh though as a wave of chains and spikes flew towards them. Hibari and Ranma split apart hoping Mousse could only track one of them while the other could move in. Unfortunately he was able to switch targets with remarkable speed (though limited accuracy) and was able to force Hibari back. Ranma was able to move in for melee range and flew forward with a kick. Mousse had a major advantage of reach however, and intercepted Ranma with a kick of his own.

As the small redhead stumbled backwards Hibari moved in for the assault. Mouse responded with another volley of assorted projectiles. Hibari managed to dodge most of them. Only most though. A ball and chain slammed into her mid-section, winding her as she flew back.

Crashing into some yatai it took Hibari a moment to pull herself back up. Fighting in a swimsuit wasn't the best option. She was covered in scrapes.

Brushing herself off Hibari saw Ranma was having rather more luck at dodging, yet continued to fail his assaults the reach difference between him and Mousse. Trying to figure out an attack strategy Hibari was happy to see Shui arrive.

"What going on?"

"Mousse declared a formal challenge on Ranma and me. If he just wanted Shampoo I'd be happy to throw the fight, but he seems a little murderous. Also there's no way Ranma will willingly lose anything."

"Aiyah! Formal challenge mean Shui no can get involved. Wanted to help. Stupid Mousse ruin date... er, hangout."

"Yeah, he seems pretty annoying. Must annoy Shampoo about as much as she annoys us. Unfortunately his style is just so bizarre and unpredictable I can't manage to get in. Ranma is managing, but he's so short in girl form he has no reach."

Shui nodded thoughtfully. Then glanced around at the field of battle. Those red eyes landed on a water gun someone had left abandoned when the fight broke out. Shui cracked a smile.

"Mousse have Jusenkyo curse. Actually Shui fault. Stupid Mousse attack Shui at Jusenkyo. Dodge him and he fly right into pool. Ranma certainly have height advantage if you hit Mousse. Very small harmless animal."

Hibari's eyes lit up. "Thanks!"

Rushing over Hibari grabbed the water gun and was glad to see it was about half full. With Mousse focused on Ranma she was able to sneak into range before the bespectacled teen noticed her. Mousse launched a wave of throwing knives which Hibari barely dodged. However the assault took enough of Mousse's attention he didn't notice the stream of water flying towards his face. As it splashed him he suddenly disappeared into his robes.

Ranma, Hibari, and Shui approached cautiously. The lump in the robes that had to be Mousse moved down a sleeve with determination. The form of a small long haired black cat with a shaved head pulled itself out of the sleeve.

"C-cat... H-he's a cat," Ranma stuttered.

Any surprise about Ranma's sudden nervousness was overtaken by Mousse holding up a paw. Rather than producing a few short feline claws instead a number of sickle like blades emerged. Hibari swore that cat-Mousse smiled before he lunged at Ranma's face (more blades emerging where claws should be on his other paw). Ranma screeched and barely dodged.

"Huh... Shui suppose that make sense. Cats already basically natural hidden weapon masters."

"Why is Ranma so scared though?" Hibari asked.

"Alas it is a tragic tale!" Genma announced as he appeared with a microphone. "Many years ago I put him through rigorous cat-fist training. Following the instructions t placed him in a pit of starving cats while covered in fish sausages. Unfortunately the training left him with a fear of cats. Even attempts to repeat the process so he could face his fears only made him worse."

"Where did you come from?" Hibari yelped.

"After seeing how you two were dressed I decided to follow to keep an eye on you. I don't appreciate the way you're messing with my son's head. Especially after all the effort I took to raise him properly," Genma answered smuggly.

Ranma ran past screaming as a hissing Mousse chased after him.

"Oh yeah, a trauma induced fear of cats is really a sign of healthy childhood."

"Okay, so I may have made a mistake or two. Nobody's perfect. The cat-fist still remains an unbeatable technique."

Hibari and Shui turned to watch as screaming Ranma had Mousse land on his head and dig claws into his scalp.

"Hm, yeah. Very unbeatable."

"Just watch."

Ranma's eyes seemed to grow blank and he fell onto all fours. Suddenly an unearthly howl emerged from the small redhead. His hands seem to curl into a paw like fist and he batted Mousse from his head. The pair hissed at one another before Mouse produced yet more knives where his claws should be. The cat lept at the redhead, but was smacked away by Ranma without the latter even touching Mousse. Within seconds the tide had turned to the point that Ranma was playing with Mousse like... well, like a cat with a mouse.

Luckily for the battered Mousse's sake Ranma was soon distracted by the smell of fish and other foods wafting in from the nearby food stalls. The boy-turned-girl-who-currently-thought-he-was-a-cat ran towards the yatai and began shredding them to reach the food inside. Genma posed to shed a dramatic tear.

"The only downside to this technique is he takes on the mind of a cat when using it. Words can no longer reach him," the elder Saotome explained passionately as he produced a large sack. "The only way to break him out of it was the calming care of a kindly old woman who'd lived nearby. Unfortunately we were in Nagano at the time so there's no way we could reach her."

"Huh, so what do we do?" Hibari asked while watching the destruction Ranma was unleashing.

"I shall have to play the role myself!" Genma declared, rushing forward in a grey wig and very grandmotherly dress.

Hibari and Shui sat stunned for a few moments. They just watched in silence as Genma charged aggressively towards Ranma waving a cat toy. They weren't surprised at all when the small redhead sent his father flying with a single swipe. Both knew enough to know that was not how you interacted with a cat.

"And he says I'm a weirdo for wearing dresses," Hibari muttered before turning to Shui. "I'll try to calm Ranma down. You go check on Genma... And Mousse I guess."

Shui gave an agreeable shrug. The red eyed 'boy' wandered off in the direction both had flown. Hibari then moved cautiously towards Ranma, who was munching happily on some squid (purring loudly). Hibari slowly held out a hand and beckoned Ranma forward.

"Here Ranma. Come here. I won't hurt you," she said in as friendly a tone as possible.

The curvy redhead paused and turned to her. His eyes suddenly lit up and he pounced. Hibari was terrified for a moment, until she realised he had only knocked her on her rear and curled up in her lap. Nervously she tried to pet the little redhead and he let out a content purr. Finding it cute (despite the context) she decided to scratch him behind the ears. The purring continued while he began to wash his face like a cat.

Hibari noticed Shui approaching, dragging a half conscious Genma and carrying a passed out little neko-Mousse. Cologne and Shui's father approached from the other direction, the look on their faces making it clear they were glad they'd set up at a different stall location. Hibari didn't want to upset Ranma, so sat patiently hoping he would fall asleep. The smaller redhead stretched in Hibari's lap, and seemed ready to sleep. Just before curling up he turned turned his face towards Hibari's.

And kissed her.

Author's notes: As some of you are fond of Hibari I thought I should mention my friend ExceedinglyTrans has started a Hibari fic called Listen! I'm a Girl!. In my humble opinion it's great. (Along with her Ranma fic Ranma: Queer Metamorphosis.)